9:29.
It's a time that will never leave his memory. To some, it is simply a number on the clock, but not to Noah Puckerman. The details of that night live on in the depths of his memory. He can tell you that the colour of his shirt was forest green, that Pink Floyd was playing on his ipod, that he had two lives left on the Mario video game he was playing.
The phone rings once.
He ignores it, he assumes that it's probably toll free at this hour of the night.
It rings again.
He leaves it, expecting his mother to answer it.
It rings again.
He sighs and leans over, picking up the phone.
"Hello."
The voice on the other end is distraught. He recognizes it but can't place whom it belongs to. The next thing she says gives it away.
"Is she okay?" he frantically asks.
The answer to his question makes his heart stop beating.
He drops the phone.
9:31
He screams, "Why, why her? Why do all the fucking bad things happen to her?"
His mother runs up the stairs. She finds him crying and screaming.
"What is it honey?" she questions, running to his side.
"Quinn…car…accident…drunk driver hit….her" he manages to choke out.
His mother wraps her arms around him.
His tears fog his vision.
"I love her," he screams, "How did this happen to her? She doesn't deserve any of this!"
"Horrible things happen to good people," his mother says, through her own tears.
"I should have saved her."
"This is not your fault Puck."
He wants to punch the asshole who did this to her.
9:35
His mother convinces him that he is too distraught to drive.
She pulls him to the garage, forcing him into the passenger seat.
She puts the keys in the ignition of her car and backs out of the driveway.
Time couldn't move any slower.
Puck pulls out his phone.
There are twelve missed calls from Santana, eight from Finn, five from Berry.
He wants to vomit.
9:43
His mother pulls up to the emergency zone in the hospital.
She squeezes his hand, and quietly says, "stay strong…for Quinn."
He doesn't respond.
He opens the door, and steps out before she even comes to a complete stop.
Puck runs to the hospital doors.
He rushes up to the front desk, his body weak with worry.
Santana stops him.
"They don't know anything yet," she whispers.
She collapses into his arms.
9:44
Santana pulls away, tears streaming down her face.
She looks like shit.
But he does too.
"Why her?" he asks, it hurts too much to say her name out loud.
"I don't know," she answers.
At this point, it's the only answer they have.
He latches onto it.
9:47
Puck sinks down into the chair next to Finn.
He feels the pressure of Finn's hand on his back.
He turns to look at his best friend.
Puck hates the look that he finds in his eyes.
It's fear, fear of everything not being okay.
Finn loved her too. In a different way, but it was still love nevertheless.
Santana is pacing the room.
Rachel's eyes are rimmed in red.
She puts her head in her hands, and weeps.
9:52
He notices a blonde woman sitting near the back of the room.
Judy Fabray.
He walks over and silently wraps his arms around her frail, shaking body.
He can sense her surprise, but feels her hands tighten around him in return.
The wetness from her tears, dampen his shirt.
"I loved her," he whispers, his voice barely audible.
"I know," she says in return.
"I should've tried to help her…while I had the chance."
Judy stares him straight in the eye.
"You did help her…never forget that, no matter what happens."
9:58
He watches as more people arrive: Sam, Mercedes, Brittany, Mr. Shue…
The entire glee club is crowded in the waiting room.
Not a free chair is in sight.
He notices people approaching him, but he can't talk.
He feels numb.
Suddenly, he feels incomplete without her.
He thinks about all the people that loved her, and how he shouldn't have given up.
He thinks about Beth, and how she will never remember Quinn's face.
But mainly, he thinks about them, and what could've been.
9:59
He pulls out his phone and stares at it.
He watches as his fingers hit the familiar buttons.
Puck's body feels separate from his mind.
When she answers, he feels like he's going to faint.
"Shelby…Q-Quinn was hit by a drunk driver tonight. She's at the general hospital."
He can hear Shelby's heavy breathing on the other end.
She starts to cry.
So does he.
"Can you come?" he chokes out, "with Beth."
He breathes a sigh of relief at Shelby's answer.
"I just…I need Quinn to see her again, just in case she…" he chokes on his own tears.
"If…she doesn't make it," he finishes.
Hearing himself say the words out loud scares him.
10:08
He stares at the hospital doors; his eyes haven't moved in minutes.
Shelby rushes in looking frantic, Beth is on her hip.
She runs over to Puck and buries her head into his shoulder.
Their screwed up history together is exactly that – history.
He kisses his daughter softy on the cheek.
Everything about her reminds him of Quinn.
She's perfect, absolutely perfect.
It gives him some relief to see a piece of Quinn right in front of his very eyes.
It also makes his heart ache even more.
10:12
A doctor walks in the waiting room.
Puck can't figure out the look etched on his face.
"Are you all acquaintances of Quinn Fabray?" he asks.
"We're more than acquaintances," Rachel says slowly, "we're her family."
Puck looks over at her, and they lock eyes.
Something passes between them: maybe it's hope.
"Quinn's in critical condition. She's in a comatose state; we are doing everything we possibly can, but I'm afraid to tell you that her chances are low."
"How low?" Santana screams, practically throwing herself at him.
"I suggest that you say your goodbyes now. I'm so sorry," he says regretfully.
Puck crumbles to the floor.
10:34
He watches as Santana files out of Quinn's hospital room.
She's one of the last few people to say goodbye.
She looks weak, vulnerable, unmasked.
He's not used to seeing her this way, and her lack of strength scares him.
She shakes her head slowly.
"I don't know what I'm going to do without her," she whispers.
"Me either."
"She's my best friend. I love her."
"She loves you too."
Santana nods, "I miss her already."
"I love her so damn much, and she never even knew it."
"She knew Puck… because she loved you too."
10:36
He gently grabs Beth from Shelby's arms, and walks slowly to her room.
He takes a deep breath when he enters, bracing himself for the worst.
A sigh of relief escapes his lips when he sees her lying there. Her face is untouched and as beautiful as ever.
As he glances down her body, he notices bruises, cuts, and blood.
He tears his eyes away, and forces himself to look at her angelic face.
The way she should be remembered.
"This is your mommy Beth," he says to the toddler.
She may not remember this day, but when Beth asks about Quinn in the future, he wants to be able to tell her that she was able to say goodbye properly.
"She was a beautiful woman, both inside and out. Strong, determined, a little bitchy sometimes, but she also had a sweet side, a tender side; especially when she was with you."
Beth makes a cooing sound, and he brings her closer to the bed.
"I'll tell you all about her someday, and how much I loved her."
Beth reaches out with her tiny hand, and softy strokes Quinn's cheek.
"She loved you very much, more than anything in the world, she would never want you to forget that."
Beth blows Quinn a kiss.
It's a sad goodbye, but a beautiful one.
It's the kind of goodbye that Quinn always deserved to have, but never received.
10:51
Puck watches as a tearful Judy leaves Quinn's room.
She asked if he wanted to be the last one to say his goodbyes, and he accepted.
He sits himself down in the chair beside her bed.
Reaching down, he interlaces his fingers with hers.
For a second he feels complete again, like they are finally together, reunited.
Then he remembers how far from complete they really are.
He stares at her face for the longest time, trying to remember every detail: her rosy lips, thick blonde hair, and fair complexion. He wishes that he could see her hazel green eyes again. The ones that always revealed to him what she was thinking.
"God dammit Q, I don't understand why this had to happened to you. You've been through more shit than anyone should ever have to go through. You're the strongest person I know. I know it sounds selfish, but I have no idea what the fuck I'm going to do without you. Who will I make fun of Berry with? Who will I yell at for being selfish? Who will hug me when I'm sad, or when we win sectionals? I know that we have a complicated relationship, but I wouldn't change a thing; except for the year we spent avoiding each other. I know that it hurt to be around each other, but it hurt even more to be apart. I missed you so much, I'll never forgive myself for missing out on an entire year with you."
He takes a deep breath, as he grips her hand tighter.
"We can tell each other things that we can't tell other people. I can be myself around you. I shouldn't have been so hard on you this year; I should have been there for you. I know that you were having a tough time, and I'm sorry…I'm so so sorry. I promise you that I will make you proud. I'll live out your dreams for you; I swear that I'll get out of this town and make something of myself. I tell Beth all about you. I tell her about how you used to raise your eyebrows when you were unimpressed, how you absolutely loved bacon when you were pregnant with her, how you got into every single school you applied for, especially the Ivy League schools like Yale."
A tear falls from his eye and hits her bruised arm.
"You always told me that you just wanted someone to love you, but Q, you were loved by so many people. You touched so many lives, you just didn't realize it. Please don't leave me Q, I need you, we all need you. I love you so much."
He leans down and softy kisses her on the lips.
He stares at her face once more, never letting his eyes wander to her injuries.
He wants to remember Quinn as the woman she was.
"I love you…"
He goes to leave the room.
Out of the corner of his eye, he catches sight of something fluttering.
Her eyelashes move ever so slightly against her skin.
Puck wonders for a brief moment if he is just imagining things.
He runs outside and calls for the nurse.
The next few moments are a blur, and he can't remember much.
He can't remember that the wall colour was a dusty grey, that there were two dozen yellow roses sitting by her bedside table, or that the clock on the east wall was facing the window. He can't tell you what time it was when the doctors and the nurses rushed in, and he got pulled out of the room.
However, he does remember every single detail of Quinn's face.
He remembers seeing her move.
After that, nothing else matters.
Five years later, 9:29
Puck lies in bed and glances at the clock.
It is 9:29.
His mind immediately flashes back to that night.
It's impossible for him to not think about it.
The time will forever be engraved into his mind, whether he wants to remember it or not.
Most things, he wants to forget.
He wants to forget about the pain she experienced.
He wants to forget about how broken and hurt she looked.
He wants to forget about the anger that boiled up inside of him.
He wants to forget the sadness he felt at the thought of never being with her again.
But, he wants to remember what it was like to see her moving.
He wants to remember how it felt to hear Quinn tell him she loved him back.
He wants to remember how the worst day of his life, was also the best day, because it brought them back together.
Now, he glances over at his beautiful wife lying beside him.
God gave Puck his angel back five years ago, and he's never let go since.
He never will.
Quinn opens her eyes to find him staring at her.
She snuggles closer to him.
He wraps an arm around her, pulling her close.
"I love you," she says.
"I love you too…especially now."