"Teardrops on My Guitar"
I sat in the great hall next to the one man that I could never have, but wanted more than anything. He made a joke about Professor Snape and I smiled. I can't let him know. He would laugh and make fun of me like he does with Snape.
I hope he doesn't see the way I look at him, the way I feel about him inside. I need someone to hold me, someone to love me. But he won't. He can't. How could he when he has her.
He talks about her all the time. I don't see it, but for him to notice her she must be beautiful. She is attractive I suppose. Long black hair, very petite, that cocoa colored skin, the big brown eyes. Yes, she is attractive. Not like me. Straggly red hair, pale freckled skin, not much of a shape, and eyes that are nothing special.
I hope she realizes how lucky she is, to have him. I have to live without him because of her. Well, I guess it's not only because of her, because he would never like me whether she was around or not. But it's easier to have her to blame it on, than just knowing I'm not good enough.
Harry
looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm
needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful,
that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to
live without
"So, Ginny, are you looking forward to the quidditch match against Slytherin this Saturday?"
"Yea, Harry, I can't wait?" He talked to me!
"How come you answered Harry, but not me?" Ron asked. I started blushing furiously. I can't believe how when he's around, I block everyone else out. I don't hear or see anyone. It's like our own little world, a place where I can pretend he is mine even if he isn't.
Harry turned back toward Ron and started talking about Cho again.
"So, mate, you really like her don't you."
"Yea, I do. I think I could love her." Hearing those words come out of his perfect mouth and seeing the happiness in his eyes makes me want to cry.
But I don't. I just smile, and get up to go outside. It's a Saturday and luckily no classes. I can just sit out by the lake without a worry in the world. It hurts so much that he doesn't know how I feel. At night, I stay awake thinking about him, thinking about whether I should tell him or not.
I know I shouldn't, I can't. I would be too afraid. Why would he want me anyway?
Harry
talks to me, I laugh cause it's so damn funny
That I can't even
see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally
got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at
night
I
walk up to my dorm and get the guitar that Hermione bought me a
couple years ago. She taught me to play and I started writing my own
music. I take it back out to the lake and start strumming away;
always feeling a little more relaxed when I play. It was the best
release from reality. I start singing a song I wrote for him, but
knew he would never know. He's heard it and told me it was
wonderful, and he asked me who it was about. I laughed and told him
I just made it up, it wasn't about anyone.
Thinking back to that day, I started crying. I do this quite often, it's definitely not a new sight for the students here to see me playing my guitar and crying. But they don't know why, no one does, not even Hermione.
It
starts to get dark, so I head inside. I sit in the window staring up
at the brilliant stars in the night sky. I make a wish, a wish that
one day he will love me. I know it will never happen, but a girl can
dream. I turn on last years Christmas gift from Hermione, a CD
player and I sit and listen to the same song I always do. I'm not
sure who sings it since Hermione made me this cd, and amazingly
didn't label it. I always sing along, and can't help but love
the way it makes me think of him. He's
the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that
keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep
singing, don't know why I do
The next morning I am sitting in the Great Hall and see him walk in. My breathe catches in my throat, as it always does when I see him getting close to me. He is wonderfully perfect, and of course she is with him. I wish I could be perfect. The perfect lips, the perfect hair, the perfect smile, and his perfect scar that too many people gush about. That scar is the only reason she is with him; the fame of the boy who lived. She doesn't love him like me. She is only going to hurt him
Cho needs to realize what she has. If I were her I would never let go of him. My hand would always be in his or his arms around me, I would give him every part of me: mind, body and soul. I would look him in his gorgeous green eyes and tell him how lucky I am to have found such an amazing person to love me. I would tell him how much I love him and that I will always be there for him. Hold him like there was no other man on earth, like if I were to let go of him, I would no longer be able to breath.
Harry
walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes,
so perfectly, the kind of flawless I wish I could be
She'd better
hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes
and know she's lucky cause
His eyes glance over at me, and he smiles. Does he know what I'm thinking? Should I tell him that he is the reason I am always crying, always needing my release, playing my guitar, singing about a man I love but will never have? I can't.
That night, I again wish on a star, I again listen to my song, and I go to lie down.
He's
the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that
keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep
singing, don't know why I do
The girls are having a slumber party down in the common room tonight, so I have the dorm to myself. I sit on my bed and I cry. I look over to my nightstand and pull the drawer out. I see the picture, my favorite picture. It's of Harry and me in Hogsmeade last year. It was my birthday and he gave me a necklace. It was a silver lightning bolt on a black cord. The picture was of him putting the necklace over my head and then hugging me.
I put the picture away, and make a vow to myself to forget him, to move on. There are plenty of guys who have asked me out. In fact, just today Dean Thomas asked me to go to Hogsmeade with him this Saturday after the quidditch match. I told him I would think about it. Maybe I will say yes. Yes, I think I will.
I lean back on my pillow, thinking that perhaps, for once, I will sleep. This resolution I have made myself will hopefully allow me some rest.
So
I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture
down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight
My eyes are nearly closed when I hear a tapping on the window. I look out and Harry is floating there on his broom.
"Harry, what are you doing here?" I throw my robe on, realizing I only had on a lavender tank and boy shorts.
"I needed to think a bit and always fly when I need to think. Just like you always play your guitar when you need to think." Harry smiled that big toothy grin he gets when he is happy.
"Okay, but that doesn't explain why you are at my window. Hermione's is a story up if you were looking for her." Ginny had a hint of jealousy in her voice.
"No, I was looking for you. I was wondering if you would like to fly with me for a while, it's a beautiful night out." Harry reached his hand out to her, and she hesitantly took it. At the touch, her heart nearly busted out of her chest. It was rare touches and moments like this that made her so happy.
Once on the broom, she tried not to lean too much on Harry, afraid he would feel her heart pounding. Harry had other plans; he wrapped his right arm around her waist and pulled her right back against him, right between his legs. He then let his hand slide down to her thigh and left it lying there.
He landed right beside the lake at Ginny's favorite spot to sit. Harry sat down and pulled Ginny down right next to him, so close that their thighs were touching.
"Harry, can I ask you something?" Ginny looked him in the eyes, the moonlight making the green in them shine.
"Anything."
"Where's Cho?" Ginny couldn't help it. He had a girlfriend, and yet, she felt like he was trying to make a move on her. She loved him yes, and wanted to be with him more than anything. But she would not be the woman on the side.
"I think she snuck to Hogsmeade with Cedric." He seemed so nonchalant about it.
"She's cheating on you?" Ginny would kill her. How could she? Was he just using her to get over the pain of Cho cheating? Her heart felt like it was about to break.
"No. We broke up." Harry looked at her and smiled.
"How are you smiling? I heard you whisper to Ron that you could love her just yesterday." Ginny was confused.
"I broke up with Cho, because she wasn't the girl I was talking about yesterday."
"Then who was?" Ginny needed to know who she should be jealous of now, who to start making a dartboard out of their picture.
"That girl is you."
He's
the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got
enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep
singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, but there's
never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into..Before
Ginny could respond, or even absorb what he had just said, he leaned
in and kissed her. She was in heaven. She kissed him back, feeling
his arms wrap tight around her waist. After kissing for a few more
minutes, Harry stood and pulled her to her feet.
"Ginny, would you be my girlfriend?" Harry tried to look serious, but she could see the excitement and worry in his eyes. She just grinned and leaned up and kissed him. She whispered against his lips, "Yes Harry, it would be a dream come true."
They climbed on the broom and he took her back to her room, which was still empty. Ginny smiled at him and leaned in for one last kiss goodnight. He turned to fly back to his dorm, and Ginny smiled. As soon as he was out of sight, she started screaming and jumping around. All of the girls from the common room and the ones from the top floor, which included Hermione, ran to her dorm room with their wands raised.
"What's the matter Gin?"
"What's wrong?"
"What's with the screaming?"
Ginny couldn't tell who asked what, but she thought she would just yell it out to everyone.
"Harry Potter just asked me out, and he kissed me!!"
She started jumping and screaming again. The girls all congratulated her, some a little less willingly as others. After all, he is Harry Potter.
When they left, Ginny laid her head down to sleep, without making a wish, without singing her song, and without looking at the picture. She still had trouble sleeping though, because she kept running their kisses through her head.
Harry looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
The next day, when Harry walked into the great hall, it was the red head on his arm. Both of them smiled, and sat together at the Gryffindor table.
No more faking smiles, no more jealousy, because he was hers, and there would not be anymore teardrops falling on her guitar.