Title: Got the Wedding Bell Blues

Author: Evil_Little_Dog

Rating: K+

Disclaimer: This is a derivative work, and, as such, I make absolutely no money writing this. Darn the luck.

Summary: All they wanted was a simple wedding. Too bad it's now an international affair.

Notes: Inspired by LadyNorbert's story, "Flowers of Antimony", located here on FFN.


Roy found Edward at the Scarlet Cock, exactly where Aunt Chris said he'd be. The young man sat in the back of the tavern, his chest on the table, cheek pressed to the wood. His eyes were mere slits and the corners of his mouth turned down. Even that stupid strand of hair flopped down. Roy pulled out a chair, scraping it over the brick floor, giving Edward notice he had company. Edward didn't even flinch.

"I take it Miss Rockbell is not as pleased with the plans for her wedding."

Edward groaned and turned so his forehead rested on the table. "No." Slowly, he sat up, his expression so forlorn, Roy almost felt for him. "I didn't know she could say those words."

Not quite sure whether to believe Edward or not, Roy let out a noncommittal hum. "I suppose it is a lot to take in. Especially over the telephone."

Edward stared at his empty glass as if he wished it was full. Roy considered ordering him another round of whatever he was drinking, but Edward fixed him with an annoyed glare. "Do you know how small Risembool is? There's one inn. It has five rooms. Two are used by the innkeeper, his wife, and kids. Granny has a few extra rooms. Which have been claimed by my brother and Mrs. Hughes and Elicia. Weddings in Risembool aren't big affairs – we sign our names in the register and…have a party." He shifted his shoulders, reminding Roy of a horse with an annoying fly landing on its skin. "It's still a day for the bride. Now it's a day for…Ling and Grumman." He passed a hand over his eyes. "She didn't actually say anything, but Winry's pissed."

"She has every right to be." Roy watched as Edward opened his fingers enough to peer at him, obviously not expecting the support. "You're right. It is a day for the bride and groom, not a pair of country leaders." He leaned across the table. "So, how are you going to fix it?"

"Me? Ling and Grumman are the problems!" Edward showed his teeth, like he wanted to bite someone.

"And they're looking at it as a way to foster relations between Xing and Amestris, which is important."

"So is keeping Winry happy."

Roy allowed himself a smile. "I rather doubt they'd understand that, as you're supposed to take care of that issue."

With a low growl, Edward flopped back in his chair. "They started the problem!"

"They're not going to solve it, though."

The, 'They should' was unspoken, but hung in the air between them for a few seconds. Edward let out an exaggerated sigh. "Fine. Suggestions?"

Holding up his hands, Roy said, "I'm not the one getting married. But I'd start off with sending her flowers or chocolates and an apology to arrive before I did."

Edward grumbled. "No flower shops in Risembool, remember? Or candy stores. Besides, that's not Winry's style. Maybe some tools from Rush Valley. Still won't get me off the hook." The last was added with an irritated grumble. "Damn it, I'm going to punch Al for this. If he hadn't told Ling, Ling wouldn't be coming, and Grumman wouldn't think he needed to come, too, and my future wife wouldn't be furious."

"Perhaps you should cut your visit to Central City short, and go home to find out what make Miss Rockbell happy."

"A simple wedding." Edward dragged himself to his feet with a groan. "I guess it's good you warned me. If I'd known earlier…" His expression suddenly brightened, and the familiar, wicked slant came back to his mouth. "That's it!" He slapped Roy's shoulder. "Thanks. See you later."

"What?" Roy, nonplussed, blinked after Edward's retreating back.

"What's the only way to resolve this?" Edward called over his shoulder. "Eloping. See you at the fake wedding, bastard." He waved a hand without looking back as he ducked out through the door.

"Eloping," Roy muttered. The implication worked its way through. "He wouldn't." No. Roy knew Edward would, if he could convince Miss Rockbell. "I suppose that solves his problem." And opened up more in regard to the Emperor of Xing and Fuhrer President Grumman. "That brat is going to be the death of me."


~ end ~