Memories and Photos
The sun rose over the horizon line just like any other day. But, this wasn't any ordinary day; it was Noah's second birthday. I wanted this to be a special day for him; one that may not have necessarily remembered details about, just to remember that it was amazing. It was just the three of us on a special celebration, viewing the mountains from a birds eye view. We had a close friend fly us his airplane for an hour or two, just so we could marvel at the beauty God had created on the Earth. March 14. There might be snow still covering the mountain tops, just maybe. Hunter carried Noah to the airplane which was driven by our life long friend, Shane. He always did have a strange fondness for the air. I just remember Noah being so excited. He was practically jumping out of Hunters arms, begging for the ride to begin. Hunter just laughed his signature "I'm-truly-happy-and-not-pretending" laugh, with his signature smile. Noah definitely had his father's genetics. Blonde hair, blue eyes…his stubbornness, but then again Hunter is always telling me how stubborn I am. I guess we are just a stubborn family. But, Noah has my brains. He is already creating music, weather it's beating on pots and pans in the kitchen or playing the piano in the living room with me, or playing (well sort of) the guitar Hunter got him for Christmas. Life couldn't be more perfect than at that moment. My two favorite people in the world were right in from of me, smiling and laughing.
"Come'o Mommy! Ucle Shae take us for ride!" Noah demanded excitedly.
"Yea, come 'on Mommy, your taking forever!" Hunter joined in with his son while giving a slightly playful smile. I just shook my head and took my place between Hunter and Noah on the plane. I never have had a great fondness for flying, Hunter knew that though. Sweetly, he held my hand as the plane took off from the ground and into the calm, March air. Noah was ecstatic. He was squealing with excitement as he looked at the shrinking trees below him. We flew around for a while, and Hunter still held my hand for support. I really hate flying. Suddenly, I realized that the trees below us were getting bigger at an abnormally fast rate. We were getting too close to the mountains. I closed my eyes shut for a moment, hoping that I was imagining things. I opened them only to realize that I wasn't seeing things. Hunter realized this problem soon after I did as a panic look swept over his face; something was wrong with the plane. Noah began to cry out as he too understood something was not right. His screams were cries of nervousness. As quickly as possible, Hunter tightened his grip on my hand and wrapped his other arm around me to protect me. I tried to reach Noah to protect him, but it was too late. We were on the ground, in the roaring flames. I couldn't even think, I just remember being pulled out by Hunter. There was actually clean, fresh air to breathe again once we got to safety. I took a deep breath, and stopped in mid breath. Noah. He was still in his car seat.
"Hunter! Get my baby, he's still in there. Hunter get him!" I screamed in desperation for my child. Hunter sprinted into that inferno before I even was half way through my sentence. Minutes seemed like hours. Time had a way of slowing down on me in the worst situations. After the eternity, I saw Hunter come out, empty handed. Reality hadn't struck me quiet yet. I don't even remember falling to my knees, but I do remember Hunter crouching down in tears.
"I-…I-", he couldn't day it, but continued to try. "I couldn't get him Kira, I just couldn't save him." Reality fell upon me, and hard as he said that. My little boy was dead. I just fell into Hunters burnt arms, not able to comprehend the fact that he was gone forever, I would never get to see him laugh, or play, or smile again. He would never cry out my name in excitement, or run to me when he was afraid. He was gone, forever. I wasn't for a couple of minutes before I realized Hunters condition. A least m80 of his body had to have been burnt and his arm, it was very limp and abnormally bent. But, he stood up and waved his arms to try to signal down help while Shane left to find help. Two hours he did that. The flames died down during that time at the skeleton of the plane remained. My gaze searched over plane, not wanting to see what I knew I would find. But I still continued to search the plane with my eyes. Then my eyes fell upon the one thing I didn't want to see. The car seat, just an empty car seat. There wasn't even a body there. He was completely gone. No remains of him were left except for memories and pictures. The rest was all a blur until help came for us. I remember starring at the car seat thinking that was the last place he ever sat, and that this would be his eternal resting place. He wouldn't even get to come home with us.
Once on the resting plane, after much struggling to stay with my "son", I felt numb. I searched the rescue plane, looking at the others on the plane. Shane wasn't in too bad of shape, just minor injuries like a broken leg and minor burns, but nothing terrible. That was good. I'm glad he survived in great shape. But then I came across a man with a head the size of a pumpkin. He was waving at me with a small, yet sad smile. It took me a moment to realize who it was. My eyes widened with shook. I was Hunter. I didn't even recognize my once handsome husband. I waved back as more tears formed in my eyes, even though I believed that I was completely dried out. But before my vision was completely blurry I saw him mouth four simple words at me
I love you Kira.
I tried to mouth the same ones back, only with his name. But, his eyes closed, and the life in him was gone. He was dead. I watched him die. He was slowly dieing the entire time. And here, on the rescue plane to safety, he died. In one day, I lost everything that meant the world to me; my son, and the love of my life. Both gone. All I have left of them is my memories and pictures. Both gone, in one day, in three hours, in the same accident, never to return. No matter how tired or dehydrated I was, I still cried harder than I have in my entire life. How could I continue on living?
The next year and a half was the hardest time in my life. I kept blaming God, myself, and anyone I could for their deaths. I was angry, depressed, and found out shortly after the accident that I was pregnant. I was pregnant. After I returned home and was placed in ICU, Dr. Renolds told me I was three months pregnant, but the baby didn't survive the crash. So instead of two losses, it was three. Three Bradleys died that day, and it hurt. During that year and a half, I came so close to suicide. I would look at pictures of my two boys and cry myself dry all over again. Death was only a bottle of sleeping pills away, but something kept me from that. I realized that my life was not mine to take. After I found peace, and saw my time with them as a gift, a gift that some people never even get the chance to experience, I found that voice that told me to continue on was my angels. Hunter, Noah, and little Hannah, as I call her; they were still with me. Now instead of trying to hide the memories in fear of more pain, I spread them to every part of my life as possible. They were a gift that I had the pleasure of experiencing, and I wouldn't trade those five years for anything. Not for anything at all. However, I now live my life not as I did before, with caution and rules, but I live a life of curiosity because I have no clue what is going to happen to me tomorrow, so I just live life in the moment.
Authors note: So, this story is based on a true story. I was in on Opera one day when I was board. I listened to this woman's story of resilience. Her name is Laurie Johnson. Her husband Clyde and two year old son Macallan died in a tragic plane crash. I listened to her story in amazement. The story just struck me so deeply; I just had to write about it. My story is very similar to hers, only with minor tweaking here and there.