Summary: She was sick of it, sick of everything, the name calling and the laughs, the slushie facials and constant fear when she walked the corridors of William McKinley High School.
WARNING: This story deals with attempted suicide along with other dark and adult themes throughout. Do not read if you are not comfortable with that.
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Rachel Berry walked through the doors of her beautifully decorated, but modest, home in a suburb of Lima, Ohio. She lived with her dads, Hiram and Leroy, but they were never home. Always on business trips or busy working late, today was no exception.
They'd be gone for the next few days, and Rachel sighed heavily as the thick front door slammed shut and left her alone in her house, shut away from the world.
Rachel, ever the epitome of brave, confident and collected, marched to her room in silence.
With the reassurance of two doors behind her, she fell on the soft carpet of her room and began to shake with sobs. Her whole body convulsed as she knelt there, crying and screaming, unable to hold it in any longer. She was sick of it, sick of everything, the name calling and the laughs, the slushie facials and constant fear when she walked the corridors of William McKinley High School. But most of all, she hated the loneliness. She was sick of having no one to turn to, no one to defend her when she really needed it and no one to ask her if she was ok, on the rare occasion that she broke her facade and ran to the bathrooms in tears.
Today had been the last straw. She was used to people calling her a name or two during the day, or people looking at her in the corridor and laughing, but today, everyone seemed to be out to get her. She didn't once turn a corner with out someone laughing, Quinn and Santana had been especially vehement with their taunts, screaming treasure trail and RuPaul, among other names, down the halls at her whenever they saw her. She'd been slushied twice, once by Karovsky and once by Puck, and when she'd been in the bathroom cleaning herself up for the last goddamn time, she wasn't taking this anymore, with tears in her eyes, Santana and some other cheerios had walked in and laughed, said "Jesus manhands, this is the girls bathroom, can't you read?" Then laughed again and called her pathetic when they saw the tears in her eyes, before shoving her roughly into the wall on their way out.
Rachel didn't cry then. She refused to give them the satisfaction. She quickly changed her top, retrieved her things from her locker, and ran to her car, skipping the last couple periods to go home.
Now, there was only one thing Rachel saw fit to do.
She walked into her dads' bathroom, opened the medicine cabinet, and immediately sought out her goal. One bottle of sleeping pills, and one of pain killers. She walked downstairs and retrieved a bottle of gin from the liqour cabinet, before slowly ascending the staircase to her bedroom again. She sat on her bed and twisted off the cap of the gin. "Now or never. Come on Rachel, this is all you've wanted to do for years, you're finally getting your chance." she muttered to herself. Without any more hesitation, she swallowed 20 pain killers in a row, washing each down with a shot of gin. Grimacing, and feeling her head go slightly fuzzy from the alcohol, she opened the bottle of sleeping pills, knowing she needed to be fast to get it done before the mixture of gin and the first sleeping pills made her arms too weak and her lids too heavy to be able to do much more. she took the rest of the bottle of sleeping pills, about 38 she reckoned, but with the effects of the alcohol setting in she couldn't be sure, two at a time and lay down on her bed waiting for the long sleep she knew was coming, ready to embrace it.
