Gale Hawthorn Vs. The World
When Gale meets and falls for the charming young Peeta he soon discovers the boy comes with some major evil baggage. Forced to fight for his new love Gale has to defeat all of Peeta's evil Ex's who are seriously cramping his love life. The Ex's range from dumb muscle heads to classy spoiled boys, but Gale will have to beat them all in order to save Peeta's heart...literally.
A Scott Pilgrim parody...Durr...With a little Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist mixed in.
Gale Hawthorn Vs. The World
Chapter 1
If you were to ask Gale Hawthorn if he believed in love you'd probably walk away with a smack to the face and the foot in the ass.
Now originally Gale loved...love, and was always the type to fall hard, but when he fell too hard for a certain someone, he ended up falling flat on his face and breaking all of his teeth when that certain someone kicked his heart square in the balls. From that day on Gale renounced love in all of its forms and decided to live a life free of temptation. Gale came to the conclusion that love was something people made up to cover their god awful relationships.
But in the back of his heart, where Gale stashed most of the things he didn't like about himself, he still wanted to find the one. The one guy who would finally convince him that love was actually real, and not just some word for hopeless romantics.
Now if you were to ask Peeta Mellark if he believed in love you'd probably get a very kind yes and a date at 7:00pm.
Despite his poor records of past partners Peeta believed that love was a living, breathing force of goodness in the world that drove people to madness, and that's what Peeta loved so much about it. From the day he was a little boy working in his family bakery Peeta loved to watch the happy couples come in and order birthday cakes, wedding cakes, and valentines pastries for their respective partners. So when Peeta was asked out at 13 by the local bad boy Peeta readily accepted. However the relationship ended when Peeta took off his blind glasses of love and realized the guy was a jerk.
Then so begun Peeta's unfortunate race thought live, falling for every guy who showed promises of being the One. By the time he was 17 Peeta had amassed a long list of past Ex's, all of whom were jerks. But in spite of all his past failings Peeta held out hope for the future. He believed that he was moving towards the One and that the One was moving towards him.
But moving along.
In his attempts to get over that certain someone, Gale had formed a rock band of misfit losers who were unlucky in love as he was. He spend most of his days in a slump over his bass guitar strumming out sad notes while his friends tried to break him out of his stupor. In the middle of their songs Gale would break into a rant about how that bitch broke his heart and he could never pick up the pieces. Eventually his own band mates would get sick of his moaning and kick him out of their garage (Where they practiced) and send him home.
After Gale had his hearts balls broken he moved out of their place and into a small apartment with his childhood friend, a Miss. Glimmer Cheney. Glimmer was a tall blonde bombshell that had no shortage of guys at the apartment, much to Gales annoyance and occasional pleasure.
When Gale sloshed into the one room apartment Glimmer looked up from her magazine and rolled her eyes in a complete 360.
"G this was fun for a few weeks but this moping is starting to get on my last nerve...for gods sakes." She said calling Gale by his pet name, but still getting tired of his constant bad attitude.
Gale didn't look at her but slumped into the one bed the two of them shared.
"I loved him. We were making plans for the future. He told me he loved me...that bitch." Gale said not turning towards Glimmer, who wasn't paying attention to him anymore.
"Right, right he's a bitch." She said flipping through her magazine. "Can we talk about something else? Like I'm having a really pretty week...you know?" She said with a ditzy tone. Gale looked up at her and slumped deeper into the bed.
Glimmer may have seemed rough, but she did care about Gale. Glimmer was the first person Gale came out to and she had helped him hook up with that certain someone. And even after the break up she offered her place to Gale and was always trying to set him up on dates. Gale was tall handsome and had a set of soul searching eyes, but could never snap out of his post breakup haze to actually meet anyone.
Suddenly her phone started playing some Pixies Bossanova and she immediately picked it up.
"Hello?" She said holding the phone with her shoulder as she continued reading her magazine. "No its Glimmer...He's being a baby you're just going to have to talk to me. What really?" She was talking with someone on the and Gale looked up at her to try and read her face. "That's fabulous we'll be there." She said hanging up the phone.
"Get up." She said smacking Gale on the head. "Clove's cousin is having a gig at Leela's Palace. I've been trying to hook up with her cousin for a hot minuet and this is my night!" She said riffling through her closet.
"I'm not into partying right now." Gale said putting his face back in the bed.
"Come on G you've been moping for like a month now. Lets go to the party, hear some awesome music, and find you something better." Glimmer said waling around without a top on.
Gale considered going but was quickly reminded of the fact that when he met that certain someone, he met him at party. "I'm not going anywhere." he said turning away from Glimmer. Gale felt a hard tug at his hair and was staring straight into Glimmers eyes, who looked none to pleased.
"Get you're ass out of that bed. I am sick, sick, sick of your shit. So get up, put on something slutty, and go to this party or I'm going to shave your balls in your sleep." She said dropping is head and walking back to her closet. Gale quickly got up and pulled out some clothes. He knew Glimmer didn't make idle threats...plus his hair had just grown back.
Gale and Glimmer arrived fashionably late and the club was in full swing. The Leela's Palace was an old place that had been there for over fifty years. It had a good vibe which always seemed to calm people down. Glimmer ditched him and ran off to find her boy when Gale spotted his band mates and walked over to them. Gales town was a small place with a big attitude. If there was a party going on everyone knew about it, but only the best got in.
Gale sat above a speaker and stole a drink, waiting for Glimmer to finish her man hunt so they could finally leave. That night Gale didn't expect to find anyone or anything. He expected the night to go on with all the excitement of watching a corpse decay. So an hour into the party Gale was still heart broken a little buzzed and ready to leave when he spotted something out of the corner of his eye. It was like a golden star surfing through the crowd of people on the balcony above him. Gale was drawn to it like a magnet to...another magnet, and quickly followed the star though the crowd. Gale quickly realized what he was following was not a star but a head of the most blonde hair that he had ever seen. It made Glimmer's hair look like a hookers wig and he was hypnotized. The head stopped and like a parting sea people moved out of the way for Gale to see.
It was like looking at the sunrise as this person unfolded in front of him. He was a blonde haired (That was too blonde to be fake) blue eyed boy with a face that could make a priest sin. He was a young guy with a strong chin but baby features that made him look like a model. He was talking to someone at the upper bar but was too far away for Gale to hear.
"G what are you doing?" Glimmer called coming up from behind him. Gale turned to Glimmer but quickly looked back and saw the blonde kid was gone. She looked like she had seen some major defeat on the man front, but Gale was too districted to really listen to her.
"I...I gotta go." Gale said Running up the stairs to the balcony. He ignored Glimmer's calls and tried to find the blonde star again, but was lost quickly in the crowd. Gale remembered a certain nerd who always attended the best parties, and knew he could help Gale find the blonde boy.
Gale searched the upstairs and quickly found who he was looking for. It was Beetee, the hipster nerd who knew everything about everyone. If Gale wanted to find the blonde kid Beetee would know who he was, what his shoe size is, and what he had for breakfast three days ago. Gale rushed up to Beetee's side interrupting his chat with three equally as cool nerds.
"Beetee you know this one guy with blonde hair? "Gale asked giving a piss poor description. Beetee turned and thought for a moment.
"That one guy with blonde hair?" Beetee asked not bothered in the least by Gales sudden Intrusion. Gale nodded vigorously.
"Yeah that's Peeta Mellark." Beetee said as if was the most obvious thing in the world. "I hear he's from up north, district 12 I think. I hear talk he moved down here after a bad breakup with his last boyfriend." Beetee said dismissing his posse of nerds.
"Really?" Gale asked wanting to know more.
"Gale I hope you're not serious about going after this guy?" Beetee said pulling him to the side. "I hear this Peeta's pretty intense, lots of baggage you know what I mean?" Beetee said trying to caution Gale. Gale drifted out of Beetee's arms and flew down the stairs looking for Peeta.
Gale had an odd habit of going completely dead to the world when he was taken with someone. He would devote his entire self to the person, and for better or worse he couldn't be stopped when he got a boy in his sights. Gale must have spend at least twenty minutes going around the still packed club asking people about Peeta.
"He's got some battle scars dude." A lonely stoner said trying to hold onto Gale before he left.
"I hear he once dated three guys at the same time...I mean who does that?" Another girl said with two guys hanging over her. In her defense it was only two guys.
"You know that blonde hair...fake." A boy with blonde hair said, his black roots starting to peep through his 'blonde' hair.
Gale wasn't a stubborn guy, but he still found this all very hard to believe. Even in the brief sixty seven seconds Gale stared at Peeta (he counted) He came to see the boy as a pure beauty who couldn't be associated with such bad stories. So Gale sat on a dirty couch for a bit and thought. He wondered if he should really go after Peeta, and if he was really in any shape to date anyone. As his buzz started to ware off Gale began to think more clearly and he could think a a deeper level. However Gale was so engrossed in thought he didn't seem to notice when Peeta sat on the couch next to him, drinking what looked to be a gin and coke.
Like a wild lion to a gazelle carcass Gale could almost smell Peeta next to him. He looked up and slowly turned his head to the side, getting a clear look at Peeta. Gale could feel the warmth and hear the music whenever he looked at Peeta. It was like a mix of a heavenly choir and a great rock song. In those seconds everything came together for Gale. He was reminded of his favorite song by the Beatles, I Want To Hold Your Hand. In rock people had always sang about lust, sex, violence or crime, but for Gale the Beatles had got it right. They just wanted to hold someones hand. Gale had always thought that was f*&$ing brilliant, and while he stared at Peeta he could hear that song playing in the back of his head.
It was at that moment Gale realized that this boy, this star in the sky, this blonde rocket, this boy named Peeta...was the one.
If you like the story, hate the story let me know so I can fix it. The stories I make do not belong to me, they belong to the people who read them and get enjoyment out of them, and as the readers of this story I want to make you happy.