As Long As I'm With You
(by AMS - 1/16/05)
Notes: Tsume/Toboe, light fluff. Takes place during episode 5. Short and kind of pointless, but I had to write something for these two. It was driving me mad. :D
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Tsume sighed. It had been a few days since their arrival in this rundown city and his patience for the place had run out long ago. It was bad enough he had started off on this foolish journey in the first place, but recent events only cemented his belief that this quest for Paradise was both futile and tedious. He now walked across a long bridge as indistinguishable as the rest of the city, Toboe following close behind. Tsume had gotten used to the boy following him around, though it still made him feel slightly awkward and irritated.
Toboe. That damn kid. It was his fault Tsume even bothered to stick around at all. The runt wasn't exactly easy to be around; he was always whining about something or asking questions, pouting if the responses weren't favorable. He seemed to have a special talent for bothering Tsume in particular, and the older wolf often had to be forceful with him to get any privacy. Every time Tsume went out to think or get away from Kiba's ridiculous nonsense about Paradise, Toboe followed him, just as he followed him now. Even so, Tsume couldn't help being a little amused at the boy's fascination with him.
It was past dusk when the pair approached the train station, and Tsume was feeling weary. He still hadn't had a bite to eat in many days, no thanks to Hige. He strolled up to an unoccupied bench and sat down, letting out another sigh. He glanced at Toboe, wondering if the younger wolf was tired.
"I'm tired. Want to rest here?" Tsume said casually. Normally Tsume would never admit to being tired in the presence of another wolf, but he felt strangely comfortable around Toboe, or at least moreso than the other members of their so-called pack. Toboe agreed, and as he plopped down next to him Tsume noticed he was visibly worn-out. Despite being an annoyance, Tsume couldn't help feeling a twinge of concern for the boy.
Toboe turned to look at Tsume, a small smile forming across his face. "Hey, Tsume... what do you think Paradise is like?" The younger boy's eyes gleamed in a sadly hopeful way, and Tsume couldn't bring himself to give one of his usual sarcastic answers. He told himself he was just tired. It wasn't like he had a soft spot for the kid or anything.
"I don't know. Nothing like this place, being here is more like being in Hell," Tsume answered, frowning a bit. Suddenly he realized how ironic it was to be sitting here with a boy he never would've associated with under different circumstances, on a journey he hardly believed in, stuck in the farthest possible place from where they were supposed to be going. His frown intensified.
"When I dreamt about Paradise, it was so beautiful," Toboe stood up and walked a few paces, then turned to meet Tsume's stare, "But this place isn't so bad. Not as long as I'm with you."
The words had barely registered in Tsume's mind when he snapped, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"N-nothing, Tsume... I just like being around you, that's all." Toboe was grateful that it was too dark for Tsume to see him blush slightly. When the older wolf turned to look at something else and didn't reply, Toboe assumed he had adequately covered the true meaning of his words.
Tsume smiled inwardly as Toboe walked several feet away and jumped to the top of a stack of boxes. Even in the growing darkness he could see the look in the boy's eyes as he stared up at the moon. Tsume enjoyed watching him at these moments, tracing the outlines of his lithe body with his eyes in the fading light. He leaned back and lay down on the bench, putting his hands behind his head. Toboe. He wasn't really such a nuisance. All this time Tsume had been suppressing his growing affection for the boy, but watching him now made him remember, made him feel.
As Tsume watched him, Toboe tilted his head back and let out a howl into the night air. It was a calming sound, vaguely sad, infinitely comforting. Tsume's gaze softened and fixed on the young wolf as he howled, taking in the moment, trying to commit it to memory. Something stirred within Tsume, and he recalled the events from the past few days. He remembered how Toboe had helped him when he was injured by that machine, how he had put his arm around him to steady his body in case he fell. The stupid kid had even risked his life for him. Have a little faith in me, he had said. Tsume smiled wryly. He had never had much faith in anything.
He didn't understand why Toboe cared at all. Tsume had been mean to him, sometimes bordering on cruel. He tried to be firm with Toboe; the kid needed to toughen up or he'd never make it. Anyone else would have stopped bothering. What was so different about Toboe?
But I like you, Tsume.
The gray wolf closed his eyes and focused on the sound of Toboe's howl. The awareness that Toboe meant a lot to him took Tsume by surprise. He was protective of the runt, but up until now Tsume had not allowed himself to believe it went beyond that. Toboe made him feel things he hadn't felt in a long time, things he never wanted to feel again. These sorts of feelings only bred weakness and vulnerability, and Tsume could afford to be neither. He was so lost in thought he didn't even hear the soft footsteps approaching where he lay.
"Tsume?" the quiet voice caused Tsume to sit up with a start, eyes fully open. Toboe stood in front of him looking a little startled.
"What?" Tsume demanded, cool facade firmly back in place.
"I'm tired," Toboe practically collapsed onto the bench, laying down on the left side of it. He lay there quietly for several moments before breaking the silence. "Tsume... will you stay with me?"
Tsume looked down at the boy, but his eyes were already closed. He didn't answer for several minutes, allowing Toboe to drift off to sleep. After he was sure the smaller boy was asleep, Tsume reached out and ran his hand gently through Toboe's soft auburn hair. "I'll stay with you, kid."
With that, Tsume lay down as well, his head next to Toboe's. This place isn't so bad, he thought. Not as long as I'm with you. Tsume allowed himself a ghost of a smile before proceeding to fall into a deep sleep.