A/N: I got hit by a brainwave.
If anyone wants a challenge, let it be 'Never Let Black, Lupin, and Mini Potter Get Drunk Together.'
evilcackle
Harry Potter blinked owlishly at his godfather, bright green eyes looked quite startled. A bottle of beer hung loosely between is fore and middle finger on his right hand. The sixteen year old's soft black hair was messier than usual, looking like it had been run over by a mob of fangirls.
Sirius Black let out a cackle, his left blue eye sparkling brightly, while an eye patch hung weirdly over his right gray one. His shoulder length black hair was full of knots and tangles, some strands sticking out like he was electrocuted as he leaned against the wall desperately. One hand pounded into the wall, while his best friend and lover was practically howling.
Remus Lupin was howling with laughter, pardon the pun. Draped over the couch, his slender body was shaking with laughter. His right pale green eye was closed, while his left amber eye was cracked open slightly. His own beer was tipped over on the floor, leaking slightly. Black's beer was on the table, trembling slightly as the black haired thirty-four year old collapsed on the ground, his cackles ringing out.
"V-Vuh-Voldy!" he gasped out. Harry let out a slight giggle.
"Voldyshorts!" Remus cackled.
Harry thought for a moment. "...Moldypants?" His question brought the two howling Marauders to immediate silence. They looked extremely thoughtful, as if digesting this. Then loud laughter erupted again, somehow louder than before.
Sirius looked like he had some kind of brainfart, before jumping to his feet. "Oooh, let's invest the powers of us into those phellytones!" He cackled, and immediately Potter's face lit up.
"Lets call Voldy!" He suggested, slugging back another drink of Blue Moon.
Remus turned to the black telephone on the table, lurching awkwardly as if to grab the phone. Only he toppled over the chair he was sprawling out on, crashing on to the floor with a loud ruckus. The telephone clattered out of its hold and down the side, only being held up by the curly cord it was bouncing on. Sirius and Harry flinched at the noise, before Harry picked up the phone.
"Let's seeeeee..." He crawled, pretending to think. "What is his phone- OOOOOH, DOBBYYYY!"
Immediately, a short being popped into existence. It was grayish, with large, bat-like ears and huge, cat-like green eyes. The Dobby-creature looked confused. "What can Dobby dos for the Great Harry Potter?" It inquired in a confused squeaky voice.
"Did Lucius have Voldy's phone number?" Harry hiccupped with a giggle.
"Yes?"
"Can you get it pleeeeeease?" He draped himself over the creature, widening his pretty eyes and cocking his head slightly. Dobby shivered slightly in excitement.
"Anything for the Great Harry Potter!" He squeaked happily, popping out of existence and sending Harry sprawling to the floor. Moments later, he came back with a piece of paper with something scrawled on it. Looking at Potter in confusion, Dobby queried, "What is Harry Potter doing on the floor?"
Sirius and Remus all at once started laughing again, startling the house elf.