Disclaimer? (not sure how these work) I don't own anything, I don't own Prince of Tennis or I Never Told You by Colbie Caillat
Those who knew Tezuka would say that he was a man of little words. The people around him would call him stoic or quiet, saying that he was just good at keeping his emotions in check and had no need for expressing his thoughts. But he knew that wasn't the case. Sometimes, there were some things he couldn't get himself to say no matter how much he wanted to.
It was late at night today and once again he had trouble falling asleep. His thoughts were keeping him awake...something that happened quite often since that day in their second year of high school.
That day had been a normal day in Seigaku High with classes during the day and tennis practice after school. The regulars from middle school had all continued tennis and they were on their way to winning nationals just like before. Everything was the same, yet everything had also changed on that day.
Tezuka and Fuji had gone out for three years since middle school. But on that day, there was gossip all around that this 'perfect pair' had broken up. Why? No one actually knew.
They were seen together all the time and never fought or had any signs of being unhappy. The break up surprised everyone, and what was more surprising was that they still hung out as if nothing had ever happened.
But Tezuka knew that wasn't true. On the outside, it may seem like nothing changed, but he knew that to him, it was completely different. When they were going out, the facade the tensai put up in front of others disappeared. He would show his true emotions and open those beautiful blue eyes. But after that day, Tezuka faced the same mask as all the others.
And as he lay on his bed staring at the ceiling thinking of those days, a song he had heard once popped into his head. He had heard this song on the radio, one of the rare times he had actually listened to the radio, and the lyrics had almost fit too perfectly with his situation.
I miss those blue eyes
How you kissed me at night
I miss the way we sleep
Like there's no sunrise
Like the taste of your smile
I miss the way we breathe
He did missed seeing those clear blue orbs looking at him- something others didn't get the chance to see very often unless they were Fuji's opponent in tennis, in which case, those eyes were scary and something you didn't want to see.
But Tezuka knew that Fuji's eyes weren't just scary, they were perfect and beautiful and the way he looked at you made you feel as if you were the only person in the world.
He missed those nights when he would wake up to his lover giving him a sleepy good morning kiss and his beautiful smile that was real and not just a mask. He had loved everything about Fuji...
But I never told you
What I should have said
No I never told you
I just held it in
And now I miss everything about you
I can't believe I still want you
After all the things we've been through
I miss everything about you
Without you
Tezuka didn't like showing his emotions in front of others. It made him feel vulnerable, and even though it was Fuji, who had already seen him and could read his emotions, he still couldn't say those words. And he had known how much Fuji needed to hear them and that everything would have turned out perfectly if he had...
I see your blue eyes
Every time I close mine
You make it hard to see
Where I belong to when I'm not around you
It's like I'm not with me
Everytime he closed his eyes, the same scene played over and over. It had been etched in his memory and his dreams and kept him awake many nights. The hurt and sadness in Fuji's eyes at he had asked him one last time before they had broken up.
He knew that after 3 years of being together, that Fuji had always waited for him to be ready, had always understood. But he also knew that Fuji was starting to think that maybe it wasn't that Tezuka wasn't ready...that maybe those words just weren't true.
And on that day, Fuji had pleaded with him. "Ne, Mitsu. Please. Do you love me?...did you ever?"
And he knew at that moment, that it was now or never...that the tensai would walk away if he didn't respond, and that he'd lose Fuji forever.
But I never told you
What I should have said
No I never told you
I just held it in
And now I miss everything about you (still you're gone)
I can't believe that I still want you (after loving you I never should have walked away)
After all the things we've been through (I know it's never going to come again)
I miss everything about you
Without you
He cursed at the fact that after being together for so long, that he hadn't been able to say the words that could have kept them together. The words he'd rehearsed in his mind year after year but had never told Fuji and would probably never get the chance to again.
"I love you. I always have...and I always will."
How was it? I'm considering a sequel because I personally hate unhappy endings. But it won't be a songfic and I'll only write it if people are actually interested. ^^;; I hope it was good!