Tumblr Prompt: Someone Like You just came on the radio and I'm dying thinking of Golly, like embarrassingly crushed. Could you write a fic biased off of it for me?
She smiled as the familiar smell pouring out of her favourite cafe hits her nose, a scent of delicious baked goods and fragrant coffee and fond memories. As she entered the establishment, the warmth and smell of baked breads welcomed her like an old friend, giving her a warm and giant hug. It had been too long – almost 2 years long. But Holly was back in town and she had nowhere to go, at least for the time being.
It was comforting to know that Martha still remembered her after all these years, and the usual order of scones and black coffee she used to have. They chatted for a while, the shop owner had a sympathetic smile on her face the whole time and Holly knew the reason behind that smile. As a wave of customers flood through the door, Martha left her – not before making Holly promise to come back soon – with scones and coffee on the house. Holly did leave a generous tip in the jar, expressed her thanks once again before heading for the door.
As she turned around, Holly almost dropped her cup of coffee on the ground as Gail Peck appeared in her line of sight.
Holly's brain froze and she could hear her heart beating loudly in her ears, a large boulder lodged in her throat. For a moment, Holly had forgotten how long was it since she last saw or talked to the blonde, as all that mattered was that moment between two people, two ex-lovers.
It had been 4 years since their breakup, which was the last time she saw the blonde. But Gail looked stunning as always, the blue in her eyes much brighter than during those last few weeks before that painful ending of their relationship. The blonde hair – though dark blonde roots were showing – was as short as when they first started dating and it looked like she hadn't aged one bit.
Gail might still look the same, but Holly could feel the difference. She couldn't put a finger on it, there was just something different about the blonde. She wasn't the same Gail she fell in love with years ago.
She could hear someone clearing their throat, it might be Gail, or maybe it was one of the customers since the two women had been hogging the entrance of the cafe for quite some time. Holly shifted awkwardly before stepping aside, which Gail did the same.
She could see the blonde struggling to keep the shock from showing on her face and Holly was struggling to find the words she swallowed down along with the lump in her throat.
"Hey," Gail spoke first. There was a small smile, one that Holly might've missed if she wasn't paying attention to the blonde's face.
"Hi, Gail." The name felt weird and foreign on Holly's tongue. She couldn't remember the last time she had said that name out loud. The brunette flashed her crooked smile and for a moment Gail forgot about the pain and heartbreak those many years ago, only remembering that smile and laughter she never knew she missed so much.
"So, uh… How are you?" Gail shoved her gloved hands into the pockets of her thick coat. How do you greet your ex, with a hug and a kiss on the cheek or a handshake? Both seemed kind of awkward and wrong.
"I'm okay, just got back about a week ago." Holly moved to lean against the wall of the cafe, as the morning crowd started to pour in. She whipped her head back to see Martha standing over the other side of the counter with that same sympathetic smile from earlier. "I didn't think you'd still come here."
"Good ol' Martha's famous pastries are to die for, you were the one who told me that." Holly caught Gail waving to Martha, greeting her before ordering her usual. At the end of her sentence – at the reminder of the past – Gail's eyes returned to Holly's and both women wore a grim look for a second.
"So how long will you in the city?" Gail finally broke the silence.
The brunette pushed her glasses further up the bridge of her nose. "I don't know yet. My contract in the UK was up and I don't have anywhere to be right now, so I'm just catching up with old friends back home."
"I see." Gail nodded and looked at her watch. It looked like she had somewhere to be. "Listen, I've gotta get to work soon, but if you're free tomorrow, the gang will be at my place to fire up the grill and watch the hockey game, so why don't you drop by I'm sure everyone would love to see you."
"Since when does Gail Peck host barbecue parties and watch sports games?" Holly quirked an eyebrow.
The blonde shrugged with a smile. "Well, people change." There was a silence as the door swung open and close and people enter and leave. This wasn't the right time or place to catch up. "So, you up for it?"
"I'll—I'll think about it."
"Alright, I'll text you the time and my address. You're still using the same number, right?"
Holly shook her head. "You can email it to me."
Gail nodded and walked past Holly to get to the counter for her order. "Okay, I hope you'll make it. See you soon."
With a small wave to the blonde, Holly left the warmth of the cafe and carried on down the sidewalk, taking a sip of her coffee.
After recovering from the shock of seeing Gail and their conversation earlier, Holly wasn't actually too surprised at seeing the blonde. Deep down, one of the reasons why she came back to Toronto was because she wanted to reconnect with Gail. She wanted to know how she was doing and if she was happy. Well Gail looked amazing, Holly could tell her skin was glowing even though she was covered in winter clothing.
Temporarily living in Lisa's guestroom, Holly found herself alone at her best friend's apartment, thinking about her encounter with Gail and the invitation to the gathering the next day.
After the breakup, Holly didn't talk to any of Gail's friends, except for Traci and her brother Steve. A couple of weeks into the breakup, an offer as Seattle's senior forensic pathologist come knocking on her door and she took it, seeing it as an opportunity to get away from everything, from Gail. As everything was beginning to settle in Seattle, Holly exchanged phone calls and text messages with Steve and Traci to check up on Gail. But knowing it was too much too painful to learn about Gail's wellbeing, Holly stopped reaching out and decided that both of them needed to move on.
None of Gail's family and friends knew this, but Holly was a runner too. She too, wasn't great at relationships and at the beginning both women thought they could be bad at it together, to learn from their mistakes together. But came their last and final huddle - Holly knew, this time she was going to run - that inevitably broke their relationship into pieces.
Thinking about the barbecue party, Holly had reservations. How would Gail's friends react to her presence? To be in a room full of cops her ex works with? They love Gail like their own and it wouldn't surprise Holly if one of them pulls a gun on her.
When Holly arrived at the given address, she was surprised at the big house in front of her. Maybe Gail grew out of the blue uniform and traded it in for the white? Maybe she'd moved in with someone else? Holly's stomach sunk slightly at the prospect although it had been 4 years since their breakup. With a clear of her throat and a shake of her head, Holly pressed the doorbell and within seconds a cheery Dov was greeting her.
"Hey, Holly! Welcome back!" Dov welcomed her with wide open arms, bringing her into a hug.
"Thanks, it's good to see you, Dov." Holly squeezed the man back before letting go and being led further into the house.
Walking toward the living room, she saw the usual – Andy, Sam, Oliver, Dov, Chloe, Chris, Nick and two more unfamiliar faces, probably Chris and Nick's girlfriends judging by their body language and intimacy.
It was weird. Oliver and Chloe were chanting Holly's name and they all came to greet and hug the brunette who was standing kind of awkwardly in the middle of the living room. On her way over, Holly wasn't sure what to expect, but certainly not this overwhelmingly positive reception from Gail's friends. It made sense, though. What happened was years ago and everyone knew the breakup was hard for both Gail and Holly. They were all pretty optimistic that if only one relationship could survive and flourish in the long run, it would be Gail and Holly's. No one saw it coming, and they all felt for both women.
"Glad to see you, Holly. We've missed you." Oliver whispered into Holly's ear, and the brunette realized just how much she misses the man.
"You too, Oliver. I've missed all of you too."
"Now that the doctor is in, let's get this barbecue started!" Oliver yelled once they broke apart.
Holly smiled as she heard the older man giving orders to Dov and Chris not to overcook the meat like the last time and Sam and Andy arguing over the something trivial and then proceeded to making out on the sofa. Everyone else yelled for the pair to get a room but they simply carried on. She'd missed this, the dysfunctional family of 15.
Holly looked around but failed to find Gail, and as if the blonde could sense her presence being summoned, Gail strolled up next to Holly with a beer in hand.
"Hey, glad you made it." She offered the beer to the brunette. "Beer?"
"Thanks," Holly accepted the drink. She saw the silver band on Gail's ring finger and lost her ability to speak. "Where's Steve and Trac—" She simply stared at the ring.
"They took Leo to his basketball game. They'll be here later." Gail frowned at Holly's startled expression and looked at where the brunette was staring. Oh.
"You're married." Whispered Holly, soft enough that the others couldn't hear it.
Holly couldn't stop staring at the ring. Why hadn't the blonde told her the day before when they ran into each other? But obviously it wasn't something to just blurt out in the middle of a short conversation they haven't had in years. Holly sighed internally and followed Gail into the kitchen.
"Her name's Sarah. She's a doctor at Toronto General and we've been married for 6 months."
Gail didn't tell her how sometimes she would run into Rachel at the hospital when she visits her wife, and how she would ask about Holly, how she was doing and where in the world would Holly be.
Holly leaned against the counter and gripped at the edges tightly. She looked around the kitchen, worried Gail's wife might appear at any second. "Wh–where is she?"
Gail shrugged. "A work thing down in New York City. She'll be back in 2 days."
Holly mentally chastised herself for acting and feeling this way. She should be happy for Gail. Did she think she could just come back to Toronto and waltz back into Gail's life?
She had been pacing up and down the length of the hallway of their apartment waiting for the boys to bring Gail home from the Penny. The blonde had the day off and when Holly returned home after work to find the house empty, she called Gail but it went straight to voicemail. Holly waited for hours, getting more anxious by the second. When her phone finally rang, she snatched it up from the table only to see Chris's name on the screen. Chris told her that they'd found Gail close to passing out right outside the entrance of the Penny, and that they were on their way over with Gail in tow.
Holly swung the door open after the first knock to see Gail out cold in Chris's arms as Nick stood closely behind them.
It wasn't the first time Gail had turned off her phone and blew her money on alcohol at the Penny, but it was the first that Gail had to be carried home. Holly sighed and opened the door wider for Chris to enter and deposit her on the bed upstairs.
"Look, Holly, I know the two of you have been going through some rough patches, but please fix it, okay? Because what's next, Gail drinking on the job or getting admitted for alcohol poisoning? I love you both, but please fix this soon I don't wanna see either of you get hurt any further."
Chris swept Holly up for a hug. "I know, Chris. I know. I'm trying."
With a nod and a worried glance at Gail, Chris left the room and Holly followed to say her goodbyes to the boys before locking the front door. She went back upstairs and crouched down next to Gail's sleeping form. She brushed strayed blonde hair out of Gail's face behind her ear, taking a good look at her love.
"I'm trying. I'm trying, Gail. What more do you want? I stayed in Toronto for you. I gave up an amazing opportunity in San Francisco for you. I gave up so much. What else do you want from me?" Holly whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks, her tone filled with desperation.
"I want a baby, Hols. But you can't give that to me."
Holly flinched at Gail's sober voice, startled by the blonde's reply. She was supposed to be asleep. She wasn't going to do this again, not right now away. So she stood up and made her way downstairs to spend the night on the sofa.
There was a long silence, not the comfortable ones they used to have way back when. It was the type of silence that strangles you, sucks the air out of you and you can't find the right thing to say.
"I'm happy for you." Holly managed to say.
Gail nodded, but Holly continued. The words felt bitter on her tongue, and she needed extra effort to get it out. "So tell me about your wife."
And Holly was suddenly reminded of how much Gail used to love.
In the history of worst decisions, this might be the top of the list. Holly stumbled up the front porch of Gail's house as a painfully cold and strong wind caused her to rub at her thinly clothed arms and hug herself. She must've forgotten her coat at the bar.
It took 3 rounds of ringing before the door opened, revealing the sleepy blonde in a warm robe, shivering as the cold wind almost knocked her a few steps back into the house. Her brows furrowed as she regarded the brunette in front of her who seemed to be slightly intoxicated. Holly was under-dressed for the night too, and Gail quickly pulled her into the warmth of her home. She felt as if Holly's hand might be frozen.
She sat the doctor down on the sofa and wrapped the throw blanket around her before going into the kitchen to make some tea.
Holly shivered and wrapped the warm and soft material tightly around herself, already regretting her decision to come over to Gail's home uninvited and glancing at the clock, so late at night. When Gail returned with tea, Holly accepted it muttering a grateful thanks as her fingers felt like it was beginning to thaw around the warm mug.
She took a sip and groaned softly.
"Just the way you like it, right?" Gail asked from the opposite side of the sofa, far from the brunette.
"Yes, you remembered." Holly took another long sip as Gail just nodded.
Gail waited until Holly was halfway finished with her tea before speaking. "Is everything okay? What are you doing here so late at night?"
"I—I need answers." Closure. Holly slowly leaned forward to put the mug down on the coffee table.
"Answers to what?"
"Are you happy?"
Gail sighed. She felt bad for the brunette, her eyes spoke of the sadness that her tongue wasn't. Her brows furrowed in regret, her nostrils flaring in remorse.
"I'm pregnant, Holly."
"H—how is this even possible? You love children! You're great with children" Gail yelled as her arms flailed aimlessly around her.
Holly took her glasses off and rubbed at her temples. "I love them, but I don't want them, Gail." How many times must she say it to Gail?
"Why not?"
"Because they're not in my plan," Holly sighed loudly.
"Oh for fuck's sake forget about your plan for just a minute, Holly!"
"What do you want me to say, Gail? I told you, I don't want children and I don't want to be a mum." Holly had to keep her cool, because one of them going crazy was enough for the night.
Gail stopped her pacing and stepped closer to Holly. "Plans change, people change, you can change."
Holly moved away from the blonde. "I don't want to change! I'm perfectly fine with who I am. Why can't you be okay with that?"
Feeling hurt by the distance that Holly created, Gail sat down on the sofa dejectedly. "I tried to be, Holly. I really tried. I thought I was okay with just the two of us. We were doing so great and I didn't want to get in the way of that. I thought if I'd given you time maybe you'd change your mind."
"My mind's made up, Gail." Holly sat next to Gail, knees almost touching.
Both women sat there, at a loss for what was next for the both of them. Holly could give up moving from one place to another, she could give up amazing job offers, but this – raising a child, being a mother? She thought she could do it, but she couldn't, not even for Gail.
"I think we should break up."
It hit Holly like a ton of bricks that although they were madly in love back then, she just couldn't give Gail the one thing she wanted, needed the most. To be a mother. It was the one thing Holly couldn't give up for Gail.
Just as Holly was beginning to feel sick and tired of running around, working from city to city, Gail was finally putting down roots and having a baby like how she always wanted back then with Holly.
"How far along are you?"
Gail's hand subconsciously moved on its own, rubbing her belly. She had been touching her belly a lot more recently. There was a sweet smile on her face. "About 3 months now. I'm barely showing and Sarah and I decided to announce the pregnancy after her return."
Holly simply nodded, she didn't know what to say. She needed a moment to digest all of it. Too much happened that day. From learning that Gail was married to her pregnancy. She finally realized why Gail looked like she was practically glowing yesterday.
"Pregnancy looks good on you." Holly smiled.
"Thanks."
"So, are you happy?"
Gail scooted closer to Holly and placed a hand on top of the brunette's. Holly closed her eyes at the contact. Her heart didn't race like it did when Gail used to touch her. Even the slightest touch used to send her heart rate skyrocketing. At this moment it felt calm, like her heart was trying to make peace. "I'm very happy." Gail squeezed reassuringly.
There was no doubt in her voice, only a lightness that was filled with love and happiness, something Holly had failed to give Gail during the last few weeks of their relationship.
If Holly knew back then that their relationship would end the way it did, she would do it all over again because it led Gail here – happy and in love and basking in her much deserved pregnancy glow.
No idea if anyone would grill steaks during winter time. But the guys at 15 sure do.