A/N: Here's the disclaimer. Joss owns Buffy and all, I own myself, my mom
is, well, my mom, Doritos and Sprite belong to whoever. Oh yeah, and don't
laugh at the Sweet Pea! My mom really does call me that! Okay, now that I
have added this, I am off to watch Alyson Hannigan and Jason Biggs and co.
in "American Pie 2." And yes, this is my first time watching it. I love
DVDs!
A/N2: Okay, I changed my name in this. It's still me as Brooke, but, for reasons that come up later on, I changed the name for privacy reasons, k? Read and review people!!!
"I hate night classes!" I grumbled, letting myself in the front door. I walked to my bedroom, dumped my stuff, and continued on to my mother's room.
"Hi, honey, how was your class?" she asked.
"Fun. Business and economics. I mean, the only reason I passed econ in high school was because we never had to do anything!" I complained. "Hey, did you tape 'Buffy' for me?" My mom nodded and pointed to a video cassette on top of her television.
"I'm off to sleep. Long day at work today. Sweet dreams, Sweet Pea," she said, yawning.
"Night, Mommy! Love you!" I turned off her lamp, took the tape, and went into the living room. I popped in the tape, rewound it, and grabbed some Doritos and a Sprite from the kitchen. I settled in to watch two hours of commercial-free "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer."
"God bless FX and the fast-forward button!" I declared. I pressed PLAY. At that instant, red and gold sparks flew from the remote and TV. And then, everything went black.
* * * * * * * * * * *
"Buffy, Buffy! Wake up!"
'Good,' I thought, 'the VCR isn't broken. The tape's still playing. Need more caffeine!' I sat up and opened my eyes.
"This doesn't look like my living room," I said sharply.
"Um, well, of course not, B, this is school." I looked up into the face of Nicholas Brendon, the actor that portrays Xander Harris on "Buffy."
"Yeah, you know, that fun place where we're supposed to learn but actually end up fighting big mean bad guys?" Alyson Hannigan, Willow, said. I started to stand. "Whoa, easy there, Buffy, you had a pretty bad fall."
"Yeah, just fainted out of nowhere," Nicholas replied. I pulled away from them. 'Why are they calling me Buffy?,' I thought. Last time I checked, I looked absolutely nothing like Sarah Michelle Gellar, and I certainly wasn't named Buffy. I decided to speak up.
"Okay, Nicholas and Alyson, if I may presume to call you guys by your first names, I'm not 'Buffy,' alright? My name's Brooke. Brooke Kaminski. You guys play Xander Harris and Willow Rosenberg on 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer.' And I comfortably sit in my living room and watch you guys on TV. Not in the TV, not in the show. Remember Sarah? That's who you want, not me," I finished. They exchanged a look.
"We better get her to the library and talk to Giles," Alyson decided. I shook my head.
"No, he's not Giles. Anthony? Ring a bell?" They shook their heads. "UGH! Come on, people!" Alyson started leading me down a hallway and Xander took my other arm. 'Okay, okay, what will make them remember…' I thought fast. Then I had it!
"Alyson! Okay, remember Jason Biggs? 'American Pie'?" She shook her head no. "Okay, fine. Here, what movie is this line from: 'One time, at band camp, I took the end of my flute and…'" Alyson and Nicholas stared at me blankly. "Oh, good Lord, every teenager in America knows that movie! Every student that has ever been to band camp and lived to tell about it! I refused to see it out of principle just because you made fun of band! Alyson?" I spotted Charisma Carpenter up ahead at a locker. She had to know what was going on!
"Oh my God, what is up with Buffy? Ugh, who did her hair this morning?" Charisma scoffed. What the he-? I realized we had reached the library. This place looked nothing like sets in a studio, more like real life. A horrible thought popped into my mind, that I had gotten thrown into the Buffy-verse…only, as Buffy!
"Giles! Where are you?" Alyson called out. No answer. I kept thinking. Was I supposed to play along? I mean, I've seen practically every episode, but I still knew nothing about fighting and killing vampires. Not to mention absolutely nothing of the characters private lives! I groaned and sank into a chair. 'Giles' finally appeared around the bookcases.
"What happened?" he asked. I put my head in my arms.
"She fainted and hit her head. We think she must be delusional or something, she keeps calling us by different names," 'Xander' said.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, she thinks she's not Buffy Summers, for one," 'Willow' spoke up.
"I'm not!" I groaned out.
"Stress trauma…too much burden with being the slayer, so her mind is trying to compensate…" Anthony muttered.
"Okay, stress trauma, fine. But where is she coming up with all this?" Xander asked, folding his arms. I sat up, having made my decision.
"Okay, if I really am 'Buffy Summers' and you guys really are, well, you guys, and I'm in Sunnydale right now, then we're sitting smack on top of a freakin' hellmouth, right?" I said. 'Giles' nodded.
"Hellmouth? Hello, you people live for the weird. I only see it whenever I go to frat parties at Ball State! The hellmouth! Think about it. What I am saying could very well be true!" I exclaimed. This was worse than trying to understand my old sociology prof! 'Giles' stroked his chin.
"Yes, I suppose you're right, but what exactly is it that you are saying, I mean, about you and all of us?" he spoke. I took a deep breath and stood. I began pacing, merely to keep some sanity.
"Alright. Buffy's the slayer, right? Right. Sarah Michelle Gellar plays her, 'Willow' is played by 'American Pie's Alyson Hannigan, 'Giles' is portrayed by Anthony Stewart Head, 'Cordelia' is actually Charisma Carpenter, and 'Xander' is played by cutie Nicholas Brendon." 'Xander' smiled.
"Hey, I may not be that Brendon guy, but she called me cute, that's always good," he said.
"Xander, shut up," 'Willow' told him.
I continued, "I was just turning on the VCR to watch a couple of 'Buffy' episodes I had taped, when some sparks started flying from the remote all 'Harry Potter' style, and then Alyson and Nicholas were standing over me. That's all I know."
"So who are you then, if not Buffy?" Anthony asked. I exhaled loudly.
"I'm Brooke . Live in hole in the wall Kokomo, Indiana. Okay?"
"Kazinski?" Nicholas repeated. "Like Ted? Whoa, psycho, is he your cousin?"
"No," I snapped. "He's not. K-A-M-I-N-S-K-I!" I spelled.
"Well, you look just like her," 'Xander' said.
"I believe Ted Kazinski is male, Xander," 'Giles' corrected.
"Um, I think he meant Buffy," 'Willow' replied. I felt like crying. I was trapped at a family reunion! Doomed to argue endlessly in circles.
"Alright!" I conceded. "I'll call you by your 'names,' just stop for a minute!"
"Brooke…if you're not Buffy, but you're here, then where is Buffy?" Xander asked. I shrugged.
"Probably sitting on my couch in Indiana going, 'What the hell just happened here?' Lord, when my brother's friends find out he's got Sarah Michelle Gellar, or 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer,' whichever, for a little sister…" I laughed hollowly.
"Actually, she would look like you, well, what you really look like, anyway," Giles corrected. I shrugged.
"Whatever. Okay, so say there is really this 'parallel universe' or whatever and Buffy and co. really exist, outside of the actors. That explains you guys and Sunnydale not looking like some TV studio. But how did I end up here? I'm not into messing around with spells or anything else like that. I mean, the worst I've ever done with the occult is go to the French Quarter!"
Giles shook his head, frowning. "I'm not sure. But we'll find out. Willow, you know the drill."
"Yeah, yeah. Research."
"Xander, you stick with Brooke. Do NOT leave her side for any reason. Brooke, I'm going to need you to pretend to Buffy. If you've seen these television episodes, then you should have a fairly good idea of how to act." I nodded. "Alright, see you two later, then," Giles finished. Xander and I walked out of the library.
I turned to him. "Wow, back in high school. Um, we don't really have to go to class, do we?" I asked.
Xander broke into a smile. "Of course not. Much easier for me to not leave your side if we aren't in class. You and I only have three classes together." He stopped. "I mean, Buffy and I only have three classes together." I chuckled. "I can see this is going to get really confusing," he said softly.
"Where's Snyder?" I asked abruptly.
"Principal? Um, no clue. Probably giving some poor, unsuspecting freshman an enema this time of day," he responded with a grin. I laughed.
"Good, then let's make a break for it now!"
A/N2: Okay, I changed my name in this. It's still me as Brooke, but, for reasons that come up later on, I changed the name for privacy reasons, k? Read and review people!!!
"I hate night classes!" I grumbled, letting myself in the front door. I walked to my bedroom, dumped my stuff, and continued on to my mother's room.
"Hi, honey, how was your class?" she asked.
"Fun. Business and economics. I mean, the only reason I passed econ in high school was because we never had to do anything!" I complained. "Hey, did you tape 'Buffy' for me?" My mom nodded and pointed to a video cassette on top of her television.
"I'm off to sleep. Long day at work today. Sweet dreams, Sweet Pea," she said, yawning.
"Night, Mommy! Love you!" I turned off her lamp, took the tape, and went into the living room. I popped in the tape, rewound it, and grabbed some Doritos and a Sprite from the kitchen. I settled in to watch two hours of commercial-free "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer."
"God bless FX and the fast-forward button!" I declared. I pressed PLAY. At that instant, red and gold sparks flew from the remote and TV. And then, everything went black.
* * * * * * * * * * *
"Buffy, Buffy! Wake up!"
'Good,' I thought, 'the VCR isn't broken. The tape's still playing. Need more caffeine!' I sat up and opened my eyes.
"This doesn't look like my living room," I said sharply.
"Um, well, of course not, B, this is school." I looked up into the face of Nicholas Brendon, the actor that portrays Xander Harris on "Buffy."
"Yeah, you know, that fun place where we're supposed to learn but actually end up fighting big mean bad guys?" Alyson Hannigan, Willow, said. I started to stand. "Whoa, easy there, Buffy, you had a pretty bad fall."
"Yeah, just fainted out of nowhere," Nicholas replied. I pulled away from them. 'Why are they calling me Buffy?,' I thought. Last time I checked, I looked absolutely nothing like Sarah Michelle Gellar, and I certainly wasn't named Buffy. I decided to speak up.
"Okay, Nicholas and Alyson, if I may presume to call you guys by your first names, I'm not 'Buffy,' alright? My name's Brooke. Brooke Kaminski. You guys play Xander Harris and Willow Rosenberg on 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer.' And I comfortably sit in my living room and watch you guys on TV. Not in the TV, not in the show. Remember Sarah? That's who you want, not me," I finished. They exchanged a look.
"We better get her to the library and talk to Giles," Alyson decided. I shook my head.
"No, he's not Giles. Anthony? Ring a bell?" They shook their heads. "UGH! Come on, people!" Alyson started leading me down a hallway and Xander took my other arm. 'Okay, okay, what will make them remember…' I thought fast. Then I had it!
"Alyson! Okay, remember Jason Biggs? 'American Pie'?" She shook her head no. "Okay, fine. Here, what movie is this line from: 'One time, at band camp, I took the end of my flute and…'" Alyson and Nicholas stared at me blankly. "Oh, good Lord, every teenager in America knows that movie! Every student that has ever been to band camp and lived to tell about it! I refused to see it out of principle just because you made fun of band! Alyson?" I spotted Charisma Carpenter up ahead at a locker. She had to know what was going on!
"Oh my God, what is up with Buffy? Ugh, who did her hair this morning?" Charisma scoffed. What the he-? I realized we had reached the library. This place looked nothing like sets in a studio, more like real life. A horrible thought popped into my mind, that I had gotten thrown into the Buffy-verse…only, as Buffy!
"Giles! Where are you?" Alyson called out. No answer. I kept thinking. Was I supposed to play along? I mean, I've seen practically every episode, but I still knew nothing about fighting and killing vampires. Not to mention absolutely nothing of the characters private lives! I groaned and sank into a chair. 'Giles' finally appeared around the bookcases.
"What happened?" he asked. I put my head in my arms.
"She fainted and hit her head. We think she must be delusional or something, she keeps calling us by different names," 'Xander' said.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, she thinks she's not Buffy Summers, for one," 'Willow' spoke up.
"I'm not!" I groaned out.
"Stress trauma…too much burden with being the slayer, so her mind is trying to compensate…" Anthony muttered.
"Okay, stress trauma, fine. But where is she coming up with all this?" Xander asked, folding his arms. I sat up, having made my decision.
"Okay, if I really am 'Buffy Summers' and you guys really are, well, you guys, and I'm in Sunnydale right now, then we're sitting smack on top of a freakin' hellmouth, right?" I said. 'Giles' nodded.
"Hellmouth? Hello, you people live for the weird. I only see it whenever I go to frat parties at Ball State! The hellmouth! Think about it. What I am saying could very well be true!" I exclaimed. This was worse than trying to understand my old sociology prof! 'Giles' stroked his chin.
"Yes, I suppose you're right, but what exactly is it that you are saying, I mean, about you and all of us?" he spoke. I took a deep breath and stood. I began pacing, merely to keep some sanity.
"Alright. Buffy's the slayer, right? Right. Sarah Michelle Gellar plays her, 'Willow' is played by 'American Pie's Alyson Hannigan, 'Giles' is portrayed by Anthony Stewart Head, 'Cordelia' is actually Charisma Carpenter, and 'Xander' is played by cutie Nicholas Brendon." 'Xander' smiled.
"Hey, I may not be that Brendon guy, but she called me cute, that's always good," he said.
"Xander, shut up," 'Willow' told him.
I continued, "I was just turning on the VCR to watch a couple of 'Buffy' episodes I had taped, when some sparks started flying from the remote all 'Harry Potter' style, and then Alyson and Nicholas were standing over me. That's all I know."
"So who are you then, if not Buffy?" Anthony asked. I exhaled loudly.
"I'm Brooke . Live in hole in the wall Kokomo, Indiana. Okay?"
"Kazinski?" Nicholas repeated. "Like Ted? Whoa, psycho, is he your cousin?"
"No," I snapped. "He's not. K-A-M-I-N-S-K-I!" I spelled.
"Well, you look just like her," 'Xander' said.
"I believe Ted Kazinski is male, Xander," 'Giles' corrected.
"Um, I think he meant Buffy," 'Willow' replied. I felt like crying. I was trapped at a family reunion! Doomed to argue endlessly in circles.
"Alright!" I conceded. "I'll call you by your 'names,' just stop for a minute!"
"Brooke…if you're not Buffy, but you're here, then where is Buffy?" Xander asked. I shrugged.
"Probably sitting on my couch in Indiana going, 'What the hell just happened here?' Lord, when my brother's friends find out he's got Sarah Michelle Gellar, or 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer,' whichever, for a little sister…" I laughed hollowly.
"Actually, she would look like you, well, what you really look like, anyway," Giles corrected. I shrugged.
"Whatever. Okay, so say there is really this 'parallel universe' or whatever and Buffy and co. really exist, outside of the actors. That explains you guys and Sunnydale not looking like some TV studio. But how did I end up here? I'm not into messing around with spells or anything else like that. I mean, the worst I've ever done with the occult is go to the French Quarter!"
Giles shook his head, frowning. "I'm not sure. But we'll find out. Willow, you know the drill."
"Yeah, yeah. Research."
"Xander, you stick with Brooke. Do NOT leave her side for any reason. Brooke, I'm going to need you to pretend to Buffy. If you've seen these television episodes, then you should have a fairly good idea of how to act." I nodded. "Alright, see you two later, then," Giles finished. Xander and I walked out of the library.
I turned to him. "Wow, back in high school. Um, we don't really have to go to class, do we?" I asked.
Xander broke into a smile. "Of course not. Much easier for me to not leave your side if we aren't in class. You and I only have three classes together." He stopped. "I mean, Buffy and I only have three classes together." I chuckled. "I can see this is going to get really confusing," he said softly.
"Where's Snyder?" I asked abruptly.
"Principal? Um, no clue. Probably giving some poor, unsuspecting freshman an enema this time of day," he responded with a grin. I laughed.
"Good, then let's make a break for it now!"