Hospital For Souls, a gotham fanfic

Hospital For Souls Part 1

And then I found out how hard it is to really change

Even hell can get comfy once you've settled in

I just wanted the numb inside me to leave

No matter how fucked you get

The sun will return and you come back down!

The funny thing is all I ever wanted I already had

There's glimpses of heaven in every day

In the friends that I have, the music I made

The love that I feel, I just had to start again

Your mind can go places when you are alone I should know. I haven't had a visitor in months. I have no friends here and I'm a high risk case according to the psychiatrist here. Arkham Asylum is full of people. Murderers. Rapists. Cannibals. Thieves. Insane people. I was none of these things when I first arrived. I was admitted because of a mental disorder. When I got here, thoughts I never had before came to me. Actions I have never done were fulfilled. I said things I had never allowed out of my mouth before. It started a year ago, when I was a intern under Edward Nygma.

He was so sweet and nice. I couldn't see why everyone was so mean to him. His riddles always got my mind working and his charismatic behavior enthrilled me. He was my first crush. Sure I found guys cute before and I often lusted after them, but Ed made me feel something more. Every time someone insulted him or was rude, I debunked their bad manners. Ed and I evolved into friends. We played video games together and he let me spend the night at his home sometimes when the fighting between my parents prevented me from getting any rest. I asked Ed a question one day,

"Why do people get married Ed? Why do it when more than half the time it ends in violence in this city? You are the smartest guy I've ever had the pleasure of knowing, so you must have an idea."

He flushed at my compliment and adjusted his glasses,

"I can start a war or end one,

I can give you the strength of heroes or leave you powerless,

I might be snared with a glance,

but no force can compel me to stay;

What am I?"

I knew the answer instantly and I smiled sadly,

"Love."

Ed was happy that I got the answer right, I usually do but not always right away. I sighed,

"I wish I could remember my parents being in love. All I can remember is their yelling and throwing and late nights when neither of them would come home. I'm 17 for goodness sake. They should be divorced if the love is gone. If nothing can make them love each other, they shouldn't still be together."

Ed placed a hand on my shoulder awkwardly,

"I'm sure you are the reason they stayed together. I guess it would be so that you would have both of them in your lives so to speak."

I shifted on my feet at the thought. Shaking my head, I went to go to his kitchen when I collapsed right to the ground.

My parents didn't have the money to pay for my medical bills. Without my consent they sent me to this pit and never looked back. Ed didn't visit. Not even Harvey who looked after me from time to time. I saw in the newspapers that the Wayne family was assassinated, all but their son. While everyone felt sorry for his loss I was happy for the boy. He wouldn't have to grow up to watch his parents waste their lives away and end up disappointing you. A year in this abyss and I lost my mind.

Perhaps it was always there. Perhaps I always knew it was. Change like this didn't come easy. I changed from the ambitious girl I was to this volatile woman with an unknown need. I didn't know if it was the asylum that caused my change, but this carnal desire to harm everything in sight just became my only activity. I attacked guards who ran their mouths too much around me. I attacked other patients. I almost killed a few. The solution the asylum came up with was to put me in solitary. I guess they didn't know that silence is also violent. I screamed after 2 days in solitary. I learned afterwards that they kept me in for a week and a half. My psychiatrist thought it would help me, but it only made me hate her. She allowed me to be locked in a cage by myself. I wanted to gouge her eyes out with that bloody red pen she kept jotting notes on her notepad with. Her diagnosis was that I was mentally unstable and shouldn't have much interaction with the other patients.

Then he came. Red hair. Contagious smile. His body dripping with pride as he was escorted to the recreational room. I saw him long before he was me. He was hard to miss. His face stood out unlike all the others. He wore a smile like I had never seen and his ego was not swayed in the slightest by his knew home. His calculating eyes scanned the room but never found me. No no. I can see everyone, they can't see me. I'm in the room, but they can't see me.

Because we all walk alone on an empty staircase

Idle in the halls and nameless faces

I am powerless

Everybody wants to go to heaven

But nobody wants to die

I can fear death no longer

I've died a thousand times

At least that's how it all was supposed to go. Next thing I know, a body is next to mine. Sitting directly beside me. I could feel determined eyes glued to my face and my hands started twitching. My eyes rolled to look to my left hand side. There he was. Smiling at my face with a wide grin. His eyes bright with curiosity. It was his eyes that made my hands twitch. I got lost in them for a moment. My non-expressive stare didn't effect him.

"Hello, goregous. I'm Jerome."

I said nothing. I hadn't said a word since I got here a year ago. My only vocalizations nowadays is growls and purrs. But to Jerome, I said nothing. He leaned towards my face and said,

"It's rude to not introduce yourself you know. I gave you my name, I should at least know the name to your beautiful face."

My hands twitched again at his words. All activities stopped in the room. Jerome finally looked away from me. Turning his head to scan the room again, I got a good view of his neck. I could she his veins pulsating as he turned and I growled lightly. His head snapped back to me and he looked confused for a moment that I had changed my position in the short moments he looked away. I was now on my palms and feet in my chair, staring him down. I waited for him to move. Instinct driving over my mind as I waited for him to act like prey or to move at all. Any excuse would too. A patient suddenly called out,

"Someone get the guards quick. She'll most likely kill this one."

Jerome's eyes never left mine at the comment. He was frozen still, like he knew it would trigger me. Another patient started crying,

"Where are the guards? She'll rip his throat open like she did to Mickey. He's still in recovery. I doubt this one would make it, he's all skin and bones."

Then more began to murmer,

"She's crazy."

"A cannibal."

"No, she never tries to eat anyone, only maim or just kill. I should know. I'm an actual cannibal."

"I heard the boy killed his mother with a hatchet. Bet he wishes he had it right about now."

"Oh please, like he stands a chance. I bet you $100 she kills him."

"Isn't betting what got you in this place, shut up."

"Whatever, I haven't seen this bitch in action since they last out her in solitary. It'll be entertaining to watch her mangle someone again."

But to everyone's disappointment, the guards came in and surrounded Jerome and I. My gaze daring him to move now. One of the guards started to speak, he was a nice guy, shouldn't be working in this hellhole. But nice. I knew why he was speaking, he was the only guard I never attacked.

"Come on Lya. You've been doing good for a while now. Do you really want to break you streak?"

I didn't respond, only tilted my head slightly, still waiting for Jerome to make his move so I could make mine. I suddenly smiled and shifted in my seat, sitting back down and leaning my head back. My gaze now on the ceiling as I held my hands up in the air. A different guard approached me with handcuffs. They were going to escort me to my cell. But I wasn't through just yet. I wanted to feel something. Pain and cause it. When the guard was close enough, I rapidly found my body wrapped around his.

Hold me close, don't let go, watch me

In this hospital for souls

Hold me close, don't let go, watch me

In this hospital for souls

The guards eyes and mine locked and I saw shock and lust in his eyes for a split moment. All was quiet in the room as time seemed to slow down. Unwrapping my arms from around his neck, I used my body weight to arch my torso downwards and towards Jerome who also stared. The force of my body caused the guard to flip and go hurling into the wall behind Jerome as I did a complete backflip. On my feet, my stance was crouched and ready to fight. Time still moved slow as I moved onto another guard. My nails raked across his face as I kicked another in his torso. Time sped up and I fought three guards at once. My furiosity driving me to fight animal-like. All the while, Jerome watched with an insane smile on his face. I screamed as I felt multiple tasers hit my side but didn't stop fighting. All three men were down on the ground in agony and bleeding. I was about to attack more guards when I felt something prick my skin. Pulling it out from my neck, a tranquilizer dart. I faintly heard Jerome laughing as I screamed in fury as my eyes began to blur.

By time I got out of solitary again, Jerome did not approach me, but instead watched from afar. A week passed and he made no move to talk to me. I sighed audibly and got up from my usual spot in the room. All eyes snapped to me as I made my way to the table were the red head was talking with his buddies. His back to me, he slowly turned and watched me approach. I saw caution in his eyes. I sat next to him, facing him sideways. My hand went into his hair without his permission and I felt its softness. His head was turned to me and we made eye contact,

"My name is Lyanna Grimm. Pleasure to make your aquaintence Jerome."

He smiled now and opened his mouth,

"You held back that day. As much as you fought, you held back from killing them."

My fingers gripped his hair firmly,

"I don't kill my toys. It makes it so much more fun to watch them squirm in fear of me. They'd never expect a straight A honor student to turn out insane and capable of having them at her feet within seconds. It's fun."

"Well, Lya, I haven't had may toys in my lifetime, but I'll take your word for it."