Her light destroyed, Sakura now finds herself on a path she never thought she'd take, that of a missing-nin. Rumors of her status are spreading, and one organization has taken notice. DeiSaku maybe some ItaSaku

A/N Thanks for joining me today! I've finally decided to get to work and give back to the pairing I love to read. I hope I can give you all something to enjoy. My goals with these stories are try to stay out of some popular tropes and clichés I see with AkatsukimemberxSakura fics, especially the DeixSaku ones. I do have a plot and an endgame in mind, and I hope to make it there in 20 chapters or so. I'll really be pushing myself to finish this story. I'm sorry if it's a slow start!

As for backstory that you may need to know, this story branches off from the manga after Gaara has had Shukaku extracted and Gaara revived. Sasori is never killed by Sakura and Chiyo, he is simply forced into a retreat.

Stray Thoughts

Chapter one

Sakura's boots were wearing thing, her hair was dry and limp, her lips cracked, her eyes weary but at least she was alive. Or had some semblance of it. She was currently trekking through the land that bordered between Kusagakure and Takigakure, though a bit too close to the Land of Fire for her. Sakura couldn't help but feel slightly unnerved as the tall grass towered over her head. She gave a soft sigh as she amended that it was tall enough to shield her from the harsh afternoon sun. A firm breeze rustled the grass, the sound like a thousand paper cranes let loose on the wind as the grass bowed and waved around her. She was given a brief glimpse of the expansive landscape surrounding her as the grass dipped and ebbed. The beauty was lost on her.

There would have been a time where this sight would raise her heart, make her feel alive and free. It would make her smile as the overwhelming urge burst through and she ran through hidden sanctuary. Sakura was beyond that girlish charm. Instead she simply walked on after sparing a few seconds to glance back down the trail she had left in the grass. Like a snake through the corn field, she trudged on. For once in what seemed like a very long time, Sakura let her mind wonder, finally feeling a bit more at ease now that she was far away from any type of settlements. She couldn't help but feel a sense of disgust well up in her throat as through some introspective thoughts she came to loathe what she had become. A coward.

Worse than trash.

In all of her life she didn't think this would be where she'd end up, what she'd become, what would become of her. It was only three years ago it seemed that she was destined for greatness, for a welcoming, warm life.

'How naive I was. How stupid and idiotic. All the signs were there, plain as day.' It was going to be a bad day for Sakura, regardless of the natural splendour that surrounded her or the perfect weather the skies had graced her with today. She stopped suddenly, her current train of thought dropped in lieu of thinking about how cruel her fate had been. Sakura looked skyward, almost as if searching for the Kami who wiped her predetermined destiny from the board and substituted this existence in its place. She felt as if she was a prop in the background of some hero -or villain's- story, that that is what she had been her entire life. Her existence didn't matter beyond filling a plot point in someone else's destiny.

'Did I fill my purpose? Am I cast to the side now? Does my story not warrant its own ending? No, I will end this story, even if that ending is tomorrow.' Sakura's head dropped in grim determination, a single lock of pink hair drifting across her unfocused gaze. She gained some solace in the fact that she now seemed to be in control of her own destiny, no longer tangled in the threads of the Ninja worlds politics, of the ever looming war about to burst on the horizon. A life on the run was not a pleasant one, but the upsides it had were staggering in the freedom they brought to her tired soul. Sakura had freedom of choice, something that she had some to realize had only ever been an illusion when she was tied to Konoha.

But it also came with crippling self-responsibility.

She could no longer rationalize her actions by simply blaming it on her village, her Hokage or her team leader. Sakura was forced to accept that she killed others by her own free will. It was by this free will killing that Sakura's notoriety had grown. While it had taken upwards of six months for the news of her survival to spread once she had defected, it had spread quickly, but quietly. It seeped through the underworld of the ninja world, trickles here and there, but no-one ever quite pinpointing the origins. It had been another full year of nothing but whispers and rare sightings before Sakura breached more fully into this untapped resource that was illegal shinobi dealings.

Sakura had to admit, it was a steep learning curve for her. For starters, she had never even known something like it even existed outside of small enclaves of civilian black markets, it was not something that she had ever been informed about. It seemed like it was definitely a blank spot in the academy curriculum. Sakura could only guess it was a dirty secret for most of the Hidden Villages, something swept under the rug so as to not dishonour their noble shinobi. Couldn't let the civilians know that they were just as bad as they were, if not worse.

It was because of this illicit underworld that Sakura was able to stay afloat in this turbulent new world. Jobs were picked up, money -as well as gossip- was traded for goods and services. A simple henge to alter hair and eye colour was all Sakura needed to flit around as she liked in the illegal boondocks without having her location noticed. That fact that she was a young, attractive Leaf kunoichi did not go unnoticed, it was an unusual sight, however she needed to keep some semblance to her actual identity so that she could maintain her connections easily.

Sakura's head snapped to look back through the grass from which she came, her body turning slightly to allow for the movement. A graceless gust of wind rushed up through the path she had left behind, billowing up from her feet. Her vertically striped travelling cloak ruffled with the breeze, the left side folding back to reveal Sakura's hand reaching into her pouch to retrieve a Kunai. The flare-up caught beneath her sandogasa, tousling the pink locks around her face. Her short ponytail should have been tighter, neater; Shikamaru would be disappointed that his style had been so carelessly impersonated.

'Heh, Shikamaru, I wonder if he's alive. Probably not.' Was Sakura's last thought before she dropped to a knee, the gentle 'whiph' of an Odachi sweeping over her head. The Kunai grasped tightly in her hand was let go following her clean drop, but it did nothing but pierce through a haze of mist.

'Fucking Mist nins with their fucking Kiri-Shunshin and their fucking bullshit Silent Killing Technique.' Sakura swore mentally in aggravations, though silently thanking Kakashi from his strict regimen that trained her to be able to counter such a devastating technique. However, now was not the time to be thinking of Sensei's past or she'd be reuniting with him sooner rather than later.

The swipe of the Odachi came again, but from the back, this time. The blade sought to behead her quickly, but Sakura had already moved from the long range of the towering weapon. Sakura kept low, eyes gazing back at her opponent. The Mist kunoichi's stance was firm and rigid, her feet carefully spread and placed for a quick push off. She lunged towards Sakura, intending for a standard down sweep. Sakura didn't have much experience fighting against such a weapon, it was too large, bulky and slow to draw for most nin -'Which is exactly why a Mist nin is using one'- and she prayed it would be similar to countering a katana.

Sweeping to the side, another kunai was quickly hurled at Sakura's opponent as she hoped to pin her in the side. The Mist nin twisted her body in time to dodge, retreat and then lunge again, this time hoping to hit true with a sweep of her blade. All she cut was grass. With a chakra infused back hand spring Sakura propelled herself higher into the air so she could then seamlessly drop into the six foot high grass without leaving a track. The Mist nin swore, following in Sakura's direction by cutting large swathes in the grass.

The Mist nin heard a rustle from her left side and paused, realizing she had lost the upper hand. The barrage of Senbon that filtered through the grass from behind her prove home the point, painfully so as they drove into the flesh of her back, the chakra used to hurl them through the grass dissipating. The Mist nin returned a volley of kunai but they fell short after only a couple of metres, the grass acting as a buffer. It didn't stop the enemy kunoichi from lunging forward after them, piercing her blade through the swaying grasses to where she suspected Sakura to be. All she was met with was an exploding tag. The subsequent explosion pushed the Mist nin back through the air, the flames licking at her face and scouring her skin. Her flight backwards was quickly stopped but a chakra enhanced foot to the back, resulting in a swift, sickening crack. Her body tumbled backwards over the foot, landing in a heap at the feet of the pink haired missing nin.

Sakura looked down at her now screeching opponent, the woman desperately trying to move away from her. The Mist nin's legs were useless now, Sakura had completely pulverized a section of her lower spine with that swift, overpowered kick. Sakura kicked away the Odachi that the enemy woman had dropped in her shock, which seemed to snap the Mist nin out of her shock. She reached for her kunai pouch, refusing to be done in so easily, regardless of her now crippled form. She was stopped by a heel to the shoulder that dislodged the joint from its socket. There was no scream that punctuated that one.

"Reach again and it's the other shoulder." Sakura loomed over her opponent, who seemed much older than she was.

"You know the routine. Who is with you, when should I expect them, why are you here and under what orders." Sakura was met with nothing but a petulant glare. Sakura was beginning to think the woman was a mute, there had been no battle banter which she found odd from a Mist nin. They always loud mouthed, overly aggressive and hard to kill. 'I suppose there are always exceptions to the rule.'

"Once again. Who is wi-" "Go fuck yourself." There it was. She had begun to think she was mute. Sakura raised an eyebrow, but held down her desire to simply walk away and leave the kunoichi here to die a slow, miserable death. However, Sakura needed a blank spot in her information filled and this woman would see fit to do so. She wandered over to the Odachi that had been kicked aside so easily and picked it up. Returning to the prone kunoichi, she used the tip to flip aside her Jounin vest on her left side, before pressing it delicately to the black shirt underneath. The tip resting between the gap of the fourth and fifth rib. The Mist nin knew this as well.

"My last five combatants have all been Mist nins. All I seem to run into these days are Mist nins. I am getting really sick and tired of being left drenched to the bone after having to kill you fucks. I want to know why you are all so insistent on seeing me dead." They were like ants, continually crawling out of the wood works after her, and she wanted to know why. Sakura's past with Kirigakure had been that of any average shinobi tied to an opposing village.

"And here you are, so far away from home, seemingly all by yourself, so determined to kill me." Sakura's Sandogasa didn't do much to hide her snide expression or her angry eyes. While she had always been pursued by either bounty hunters, hunter nins or the average shinobi, she had yet to encounter one village -save for Konoha- so persistent on her death. If she had any chance of persuading them to leave her the fuck alone, she needed to know why, and if the answer to that why was something she'd be unable to deal with. Well, the deaths these Shinobi faced would be getting a bit more gratuitous. Sakura was a swift, merciful killer when she needed to be, the idea of putting another living thing through unnecessary pain didn't sit well with her, but she rationalized, if an example needed to be made, it would be made.

She was still met with nothing but silence.

"You are dead." She sighed, a weary, tired look seizing her face. "The second I got the upper hand, you were dead. You're dead now. To your village, dead. To your family, dead. The only thing that doesn't know that yet is your heart." The metal tip of the Odachi tapped at her chest, at the heart Sakura knew lay just beyond the clothing and the flesh of this woman paralyzed before her.

"I can still have honour in death." The Mist nin bit back in a scathing tone, sweat dotting her hair line and cheeks.

"There is no honour in being a Shinobi." Sakura counted just as easily. She raised the sword, giving it a once over, the sun sparking off the metal like fire. The blade was covered in no blood, no guts, simply the desiccated remains of the grass the Nin had swiped at. The Odachi was a weapon popular among Samurai. Samurai who held their honour above all else. It seemed this Mist nin had chosen the wrong line of work.

"You should have been a Samurai." Sakura spoke, mostly to herself, before dropping the tip back to its resting place on the prone womans body. "Now talk," Pink eyebrows rose as she stared down her nose. "and I can grant you some honor in death." Sakura knew that that kind of deal wouldn't work on the Mist nin, that they had been trained far too well to fear what would happened if they talked, if they divulged important information. So, Sakura was surprised when it did work.

"The Mizukage has struck a deal with the Hokage." Sakura reeled back mentally, her brain dashing through scenarios as to why this treaty had been sprung at such a time. "One of the stipulations is that you had to be dead."

'Trust Sasuke to pawn this job onto someone else. Like usual, I'm not worth his time.' Sakura thought bitterly.

"They'll keep coming. They will send more and more. By the time I left they were already training Hunter nins how to counteract your chakra infused fists." The woman laughed, obviously upset that she hadn't been in those classes. She may have survived, otherwise. "You have become the Mizukage's prime target. Order are out that if you are spotted by shinobi in the field that they are to disregard current missions and instead neutralize you." That would explain that chunin team on the coast of the Land of Lightning.

"Why?" Was all Sakura could think to ask. "What's so good about this deal?"

"Mizukage-sama knows that war is coming. He knows what the Hokage wants and he wants to spared that fate. He seeks partnership with Konohagakure so that he, and the village, will be on the winning side once the dust has settled." Sakura gave a nod, placing the palm of her hand on the end of the Odachi's handle. She pressed swiftly and firmly, silently sliding the kunoichi's blade into her own heart. While the act may have been silent, the woman's death was not. The violent panting as her heart tried to beat around the impalement was heard to hear, the woman's desperate clutching at the sword, hard to watch. It only last a few seconds, and then the Mist nin went still, her last exhalation slightly longer than normal.

That was what Sakura was waiting for.

Falling to her knees, she let go of the breath she was holding, jamming the butt of her palms into her eyes to rub furiously. Deep down, Sakura was still Sakura. She still had a tendency to care too much, she was still a little soft and she never could get over taking someone elses life. No matter how many times she was told she'd get used to it, or she'd stop caring about it in the end she never had. Every death weighed on her, even the death of this lone kunoichi who would never live the honourable life of the Samurai. Who would not even have the decency of a burial.

Sakura stood, pulling her hands away from her eyes to look down at her fallen foe. She had to move, Sakura didn't know if the kunoichi had teammates in the area and she didn't want to hang around to find out. She hesitated.

'I can spare a few seconds.' She thought, though she knew it was for her own comfort and not the honour of the deceased. She grasped the Odachi and slid it from the corpse, before letting it drop by her feet. Bending down she arranged the enemy kunoichi's hands over her chest, making sure her feet were tucked together neatly.

Sakura left the dead woman behind her, her Odachi driven into the ground by her head, her Hitai-ate tied around the handle. 'I have to admit' She broke off into thought, sparing another second to look at the crystal clear sky 'this is a lovely place to die.'

It was three uneventful days later that Sakura found herself on the coastline between the Land of Earth and Takigakure heading towards Kaishoku Gake, a large town well known for its illegal underworld dealings. She was a few minutes from breaching the outer cusp of the city if the cry of seagulls gave her anything to go by. Cloudy jade eyes peered around at her settings, though there was nothing very remarkable to view if you weren't into harsh grasses and decaying windswept tree's growing out of the cracks in rocks. The wind was harsh here and carried the harsh scent of seawater.

As she breached the hill she had been slowly trekking up, a much better site greeted her. She had picked an excellent time to arrive. The golden hues thrown from the sun sitting on the horizon as it slowly seeped under it were cast across the sky in beautiful arcs. The set the clouds above Kaishoku Gake on fire with brilliant carmines, oranges and yellows, though the most oververt were the billowing carnation pink hues. Sakura took a few moments to take in the sight, the stiff dusk breeze sweeping through her travelling cloak and under her sandogasa. Her shoulders dropped as she relaxed for the first time in a while, content in the knowledge that any shinobi following her wouldn't trek this far into such dangerous territory. If they did, she assumed they'd be dead before they made it to her. The illegal shinobi in Kaishoku Gake weren't too fond of ninja from the big bad hidden villages. Speaking of said town, Sakura decided she wanted to actually be there before the sunset, traversing the stone steps down the cliff face to the city was not a pleasant task when you couldn't see one foot in front of your face.

Following the well-worn foot path that most took down into the city, she continued on with her journey. 'I am going to have such a good sleep tonight.' Was the only thought going through her tired mind. It had been a couple of weeks since she slept in a bed. As she turned past the sign that marked the stairs and subsequent entry into Kaishoku Gake, she saw gazed down onto said city, just enough light left in the sky for her to be able to see the large expansive town in all its glory. It was certainly a sight to see.

The cliff side curved out before her, stretching hundreds of feet from the coast to the peak. Carved out within this very cliff, was a massive cave system, the largest of which resided directly in the middle, surrounded by smaller ones. Neons flashing signs and house side lights could be spotted from here, as could the very buildings and houses themselves. It looked just like any other bustling city or town, the only difference was it happened to have been built within the side of a bloody cliff. A thousand or so people resided within this illegal little outcrop, self-governed only by itself and its residence. A city of no rules, only the strongest and smartest could live here.

Or if you had something worth offering.

Sakura continued her trek down the stairs, into the city, but it was dark before she even made it halfway down. However once she was in the city, it was an entirely different world. The massive main cave -her destination for the rest of her stay here- was alive and humming with activity. Bright lights lit up the streets, music pouring from bars, the scent of food wafting from street side restaurants, even the hustle and bustle of a full main street help Sakura relax. Through her weeks and months on the run through foreign countries, through expansive forest and empty wastelands, Sakura always missed the presence of other people. She despised being alone in an empty world that held nothing for her anymore.

'It's been too long.' She gave a soft sigh as she disappeared among the massive, her henge already in place. Her plain brown hair and her plain brown eyes let her fit right in and be completely unnoticed. Kaishoku Gake was more like a gambling, resort town than an dark, back alley black market type thing, so Sakura found it far more easy to slip by. There were plenty of young females here already. Her train of thought dropped as her stomach grumbled loudly, the scent of BBQ tantalizing her nostrils as it drifted past on a coastal breeze.

'When was the last time I ate?' She hadn't packed enough food when she left from her last destination, an almost fatal mistake, especially if something had gone wrong in her journey here. Sakura was normally very good and making sure she had enough calories for the day to be able to keep up with her grueling regimen while maintaining enough body fat and energy. She certainly did not need to become some delicate waif or pass out from malnutrition. Sakura had to maintain her bulk to support her taijutsu and chakra consumption. She needed to make her way to her lodgings, and fast. Slipping through the crowds and away from the mouth-watering foods that begged her to join them, to soak in their aroma and vanquish them in her dry, starving mouth, and down some dingy back alleyway. The scent of which immediately helped curb her desire to eat anything.

It was a few more twists and turns until she found the place where she would stay for the night, the Ducks Dinner. Looking up at the sign that hung over the large wooden double doors, she was greeted with the same insignia she saw every time she visited. The paint was cracking and peeling, but the imagery remained, that of a fox holding a big fat brown hen, hanging limp in its mouth. What it had to do with the name of the establishment, Sakura had no idea. Another grumble reminded her she had to eat.

Pushing in through one of the double doors while she swiftly removed her sandogasa, Sakura was greeted by the average sight she had come to expect. That was the hustle and bustle of one overly packed tavern. Sakura fought her way through the throngs of pub goers, making her way to the bar where she managed to burst through the throngs of old crotchy men, drunken idiots and women of ill-repute.

'I mean I'm all for sexual freedom but have some common decency.' Sakura huffed as she watched one couple pretty damn close to doing their own rendition of the horizontal mambo right on the side of the bar. Even though the bar was crowded, Sakura knocked her knuckles on the smooth wood surface in quick succession. It only took one quick second before she was being towered over by one astute barman. She always got quick service here.

"Keiko-chan" The tall, long haired brunette purred her way. She simply rolled her eyes as the man before her dropped to an elbow on the counter, his head coming to rest right in front of her face. Fuji always made time for 'Keiko.' "It's been awhile since I saw you around. Tell me, you haven't been sleeping at other taverns, have you? After I go out of my way to get Chichi to give you a discount."

"Of course not, Fuji-kun." It had been awhile since she used that honorific, but anything she could do to make Fuji like her more was welcome. He helped her a lot and was a good contact to have. the Ducks Dinner was a tavern of notoriety in this scene, people posted jobs and traded information easily within these four walls. Having the son of the owner like her was a very, very good thing. "You know this is the only place I come to when I visit. The other places don't have barmen quite as cute." It took everything in her power to wink and smile at him without feeling like a complete moron. She was rewarded with a hearty laugh as he stood back up, grabbing a glass from under the counters ridge, his charming smile still affixed firmly in place.

"What will it be tonight" Fuji quipped with the pleasantries out of the way.

"No sake tonight, Fuji-kun." Sakura held her hand up in a stopping motion "I haven't eaten anything in the last couple of days, my supplies ran short. Just some water and miso will do me tonight, if the kitchens still open."

Fuji's eyebrows bunched with a slight show of concern, but nodded regardless "I'm sure they'll make an exception for you, Keiko-chan. If not, I'll whip it up myself." He shrugged his shoulders as he placed the glass of water in front of her before turning around and wondering off out back "I mean, how hard could it be?"

And that is where Sakura sat for the next few minutes, carefully nursing her drink so she wouldn't be sick once her miso arrived. 'Tomorrow I'll pig out on some calories and try to gain the fat I burned off back.'

A bowl of miso arrived in front of her ungracefully, sloshing up the sides of the bowl and nearly tipping out. The tofu at the bottom jiggled restlessly but Sakura's gaze was elsewhere.

"Hamasaki-Ojisan!" Sakura startled, not expecting to be greeted by Fuji's own father, let alone have him bring her food to her. She gave a respectful nod of her head, which Hamasaki returned. He was just as tall as Fuji -if not twice the muscle mass- a great big bushy moustache that covered his lips and a great big bald head. Not a single follicle in sight.

"Eat quickly." Was all he spoke and Sakura was suddenly on edge. While she tended to stay out of the stern Hamasaki's way, she was not used to him talking to her so forcefully. Something was wrong. Taking heed to Hamasaki's words -or was it a warning- Sakura forwent the spoon and simply picked the bowl up and drunk directly from it, the tofu pieces bumping her lips until they were swallowed at the end. Sakura dearly hoped she wouldn't vomit that all up later.

"You have visitors." Concise and straight to the point, the three words doing nothing for Sakura's already fried and exhausted brain. Hamasaki drew his arm up, jabbing two thick, burly fingers towards the corner of his establishment. Sakura really did not want to turn around.

"I don't know what you do or who you run around with, but I don't want this kind of thing going in my bar. I put up with a lot of shit and stay out of peoples private dealings, but this is too much. Fuji likes you Keiko, lord knows the boys sick in the head for it and I done a lot of things for you, for him, but I will not let him get mixed up in whatever it is you need to do with them." His eyes were hard and Sakura really, really did not want to turn around.

But she did

and she regretted it immensely,

There, in the dark, stolen corner were two men she had never wished to see in her life again. The black, high collared cloaks gave them away in a heartbeat, the red clouds burning into Sakura's retinas. There kasa placed on the table in front of them she was able to identify them with ease. After the Gaara incident, who couldn't? Sitting on the other side of the tavern from her, was one Hoshigaki Kisame and one Iwa no Deidara.

'How did I not notice them?' Sakura panicked internally, 'Is it because it's so crowded? So many Chakra signals fried by ability to sense, especially since they're covering theirs so aptly.' She rationalized. Sakura tried to keep some semblance of cool as she assessed the situation. 'How the fuck am I supposed to do that!?' Came her mental shriek when all three made eye contact. Hoshigaki's subdued grin nearly made her choke on her own water, but Deidara's response to his newfound attention was worse. Raising a hand to the side of his head, he gave a short two fingered wave, mouthing the word 'yo' mockingly from the mouth in his hand.

'That arm should not be attached.' Was Sakura's only thought, she knew that elbow was completely removed due to her late Sensei's Kamui, so why it was back was beyond her.

"They want to talk to you Keiko." Sakura turned back to Hamasaki, looking into his hard, cold eyes. "Now."

Please rate and review, if you have the time to!
What takes you a few seconds to do lasts me a life time

Notes:

Kaishoku Gake means Coastal Cliff

Chichi is how someone refers to their own father in Japanese.

Ojisan meaning uncle or 'middle aged gentleman'

Next Chapter:

Sakura's meeting with Hoshigaki Kisame and Deidara begins. What could it mean and why are they there? Where are their usual partners?