How Not To Flirt
In this AU (which I will probably write for again, because once again I have no self-control) Hacker and Digit and the kids are friends, cause I like to think that if he weren't evil, he could be great buddies with them.
I do not own Cyberchase, nor do I take credit for any of these cheesy and quite frankly horrible lines.
"I don't wanna do this" Hacker mumbled, peeking over the corner of a bookshelf to stare at Inez.
"You'll do it, because you should feel lucky that I'm giving you the opportunity to do it" Matt said from behind Hacker. Even with his back turned, the green-haired male could just feel the threatening glare he was getting from the redhead.
"Are you sure you're not her brother? You really seem like you could be siblings"
"Not the point, Hacker. Quit stalling"
With a resigned sigh, Hacker moved from the bookshelves and slowly approached the girl sitting at the table, engrossed in her book.
"Can I sit here?" he asked meekly, receiving a small nod in reply. So he sat down, mind racing as he searched frantically for something to say.
"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" he blurted. Apparently his mind translated 'something' as 'the most cliche line in history'.
Inez paused in her reading, giving him an amused glance before going back to her reading. Hacker slumped at the lack of reply.
"Um, uh... If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber"
He distinctly heard Matt smack his head on a bookshelf, but he tried to ignore it. Inez looked up, one eyebrow raised in confusion.
"Hacker? Are you doing some kind of weird dare?" she asked, clearly confused, if not a bit amused at the same time.
"I, um, I have to go" he said, frantically standing up and rushing over to where Matt was.
"That was awful" Matt said, as if he didn't already know.
"Yeah. That's why I didn't want to do it"
"I thought you just didn't want to ruin your friendship. Or, you know, whatever small amount of friendship you have" Matt said, rubbing his temples. Hacker sighed, glancing back at Inez.
"What now?" he asked, more to himself than to Matt.
"Now I'm going to teach you how to flirt" Matt said. Hacker raised an eyebrow at him.
"Really? You can flirt?"
Matt ignored the question, instead turning his gaze back to the entrance of the library. Hacker followed his gaze and saw Digit standing by the door, holding his math book and waiting for Matt so they could begin his tutoring session.
It took Hacker only a moment to understand Matt's intentions.
"You're going to flirt with Digit?" Hacker asked, not sure how to react to that.
"Yep. Might as well kill two birds with one stone"
Hacker didn't have enough time to allow his mind to catch up with the meaning of that sentence before Matt walked over to Digit.
"Hey, Didge! You ready?" Matt asked, smiling at the freshman.
"Yeah. My mom's coming to get me earlier than I thought though, so we might have to cut it short today"
"That's alright! C'mon, is it okay if Inez and Hacker sit with us?" Matt asked, glancing over at Hacker for a moment. The older male got the message and went back to sit next to Inez again. She gave him a glance from the corner of her eye but otherwise made no acknowledgment that he was there.
"Sure, if Inez doesn't mind. She seems to be reading, and I wouldn't want to disturb her" Digit said, slowly following Matt as they went over to the table.
"I don't mind. Hacker and I can be a backup if Matt messes up on something" she said, smirking behind her book. Matt simply gave an offended huff but didn't dignify it with a response.
"Thanks, Inez" Digit said, giving a soft smile as he and Matt sat down across from her and Hacker. Inez only replied with a small hum, already sucked back into her story.
"I'm sorry you have to keep doing this, Matt. I know you have better things to do, but I really appreciate it" Digit said, frowning a little. Matt smiled, giving his younger friend a playful poke in the shoulder.
"Hey, I don't mind! Meanwhile, stop frowning! You never know when someone could be falling in love with your smile"
Hacker raised an eyebrow. That may have been even dorkier than what he'd used earlier. At least Matt actually seemed confident when he used it, though.
"Huh? What does that even mean?"
Unfortunately, judging by Digit's blank face, he didn't catch the meaning. Matt's face fell slightly, and he just shook his head.
"Never mind. Let's just get going on the homework, okay?"
Digit shrugged and opened his math book, pulling out his papers from where he'd put them to mark his spot. Hacker offered Digit a spare pencil from his backpack before he even asked, noticing that Digit wasn't carrying his at the moment.
"Where's your backpack?" Matt asked.
"After I went home to do my other work, I must have left it there when I left to come here" Digit replied meekly. Matt just shrugged, replying that it wasn't really a big deal before he started to help his friend.
A few minutes into the session, Hacker started to wonder if Matt had given up with the flirting thing. But then, Matt leaned over, staring at Digit.
"Hey, Digit? Is there something in your eye?" he asked, interrupting the boy in the middle of his question - Something about how negatives cancel out, or something along those lines.
"Huh? I don't think so" Digit responded, reaching up and rubbing at his eyes.
"Oh, no, never mind. It was just a sparkle"
Hacker held back the urge to slam his head on the table, and he heard Inez give a small snort. Was this how Matt felt watching him? Was he even really trying here or was he showing what not to do?
Digit gave the redhead a confused stare.
"Matt, are you okay? You're acting kind of-"
"Um, hey! Do you always wear your shoes over your socks?"
The four teens went silent as Matt tried that line in desperation. Was that even a real line, Hacker wondered, or was he just saying random words at that point?
"Matt, what's going on? You're being weird" Digit said, looking extremely worried for his friend.
"I'm trying to flirt with you, damn it!" Matt said, slamming his head on the table in frustration. Digit's mouth dropped open and his face turned red. But before he could think of a reply, his phone vibrated. He checked, and could only sigh.
"That's my mom. I have to go" he muttered, gathering up his things and not looking at any of his friends. He scampered from the library like a scared mouse, and Matt couldn't lift his head from the table until he was certain that the younger boy was gone.
There was a silence that fell over the remaining three. Matt seemed embarrassed, Hacker was amused but a bit annoyed as well, and Inez was an odd mix of confused and annoyed.
"Yeah. And I was the one that needed help" Hacker finally said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.
"At least I wasn't stuttering all over the place!" Matt said defensively.
"You're both idiots. But at least Hacker's a cute idiot" Inez said, her tone stern as she went back to reading her book. Hacker gave Matt a pleased smirk.
"Yeah, I- Wait, what?!"
And so Inez got Hacker to suddenly become a cherry that had a face like a deer caught in headlights. Meanwhile Digit texted Matt later that night:
Digit(D): If I fail my math test, can you and I go for milkshakes to make me feel better?
Matt(M): Sure pal.
D: And if I pass, we should get milkshakes to celebrate!
M: So you want to get milkshakes either way?
D: Yeah.
M: Okay, that's fine.
D: Great! It's a date then!
M: Huh?
D: I said it's a date! That's okay right? ;)
M: Oh! Yeah, sure, definitely!
So things ended up okay for everyone! Yay for happy endings!