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A Sam/Andy fic.
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Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Rookie Blue.
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A/N: Sorry I haven't posted much today, it's been pretty busy around here.
This one is my take on how Andy might try to make things right after the end of "Hot and Bothered".
I hope you guys like this one, I know I'll love writing it.
As always, please read and review, I live for feedback!
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From the moment that Andy woke up the following morning, she felt sick to her stomach. She'd left Sam's place in silence, not trusting herself to look back. If he'd been watching her from a window, or standing out on the front step, she didn't know if she'd have had the strength to keep going. It had been bad enough hearing him say that things really were back to normal ... the look on his face had nearly killed her.
But she'd known that she had to leave. The power coming back on - right in that moment - was too powerful of a metaphor for her to ignore. She knew that if they'd gone further, that she would have hated herself completely.
As it was, she was wracked with guilt.
She kept turning to Sam every time that Luke turned his back on her. She'd needed to be comforted last night, and since her boyfriend had chosen his career over her stability, she'd gone to the one person she knew would always choose people over the job. She'd gone to him for comforting, to make her feel better, and when she'd seen him ... she just knew that the only way he could make her forget what had happened was to fall into that bed with him, and never get back out.
But, reality had slapped right across the face, and now she had to deal with that.
She could tell that Sam had been hurt. Seeing her putting that shirt back on had triggered something, and it had shown on his face. She needed to make things right with him, she just didn't know how.
She started with a cup of coffee. Not one made in the makeshift staffroom at the division, but a real coffee, made by someone who really knew what they were doing. She knew his order by heart, and waited impatiently for it to be finished so that she could make her way to the division.
Andy almost spilled the drink twice on the way over, but she managed to keep the contents in the cup long enough to place it in front of him at his desk. "Truce?" she asked nervously.
He glanced up at her, his pen pausing where it had been writing. His mouth opened, but he didn't say anything.
"Can we talk?" she asked him, motioning with her head that they should go somewhere private.
After a moment he nodded his head, leaving the coffee on the desk when he moved to stand up. They walked through the station, making their way to an empty interrogation room. Sam held the door open for her to go in first, making sure that they went on the "cop" side of the room.
Andy took a deep breath, preparing herself.
Sam spoke first, though. "You don't have to."
Andy paused, her mouth poised in the beginning of the word she'd been about to speak. "What?"
Sam shook his head. "We're fine. It was what it was, let's just move on."
Andy's shoulders sagged momentarily, knowing from the tone of his voice that things weren't fine between them. He just wanted to preserve their working relationship. She wanted that too, but she wanted him to understand what had happened. "Please, just let me get through this?"
He stared at her for a moment before nodding his head.
Andy took another breath, steadying herself. "I'm sorry about last night. I really did come over to talk to you, but when I saw you ... I just let myself go. I let my emotions take over, and I was completely prepared to finish what we'd started."
Sam nodded his head slowly. "So, why didn't you?"
She looked to the side for a moment before answering. "Well, first, it was because ... Luke called." She saw the expression on Sam's face change rapidly, and immediately explained what she meant. "I couldn't bring myself to do something with you without taking care of what I had with Luke, first. I didn't want to be that person. But it was more than that ... you're my training officer. And it wasn't until the lights came back on, that I realized what could happen if we went any further."
Sam listened in silence, waiting for his turn to tell her just what he thought about their situation.
"I know that we have to maintain a working relationship, and I know that I probably made a huge mistake by coming over to your place last night. I wasn't in my right mind, and I figured you'd be the one person who could make it all make sense. I know I screwed up, but I don't want this to ruin our relationship. So, can we just ... disregard?" She finished with a sharp exhale of breath, looking at him imploringly. What she really wanted to say was that she wished she hadn't left at all, but she refused to let her emotions rule her again.
Realizing that she was waiting for a response, Sam pushed off of the door he'd been leaning against. He let his hands drop down to his sides, taking a few steps towards her. "No, McNally ... I don't think I can disregard what happened. Yes, we have to maintain a working relationship if we're going to be partners. And I respect that you didn't want to go any further while you're with Callaghan. But we both know that there's something here, McNally. You came to me, McNally. Of all people. You could have gone to Nash, or Epstein, or your father ... but you came to me. That means something."
Andy opened her mouth to reply, but he held his hand up.
"No, you had your turn. Now it's time for you to listen," he told her. "Look, I'm not one for big speeches, so I'm just gonna lay it out. I like you, McNally ... obviously. This thing between us, it's not going to go away just like that. So you have two choices. You can end things with Callaghan, and we can figure this thing out. Or you can shake my hand, and walk out the door, and we'll both try to act like nothing ever happened. I'll let you choose." He finished the ultimatum by taking one more step forward, and holding his hand out for her to shake - or not.
A very long moment passed, with Andy looking from him to his hand. She hadn't expected his reaction to be this. Shouting, maybe. Him giving her the cold shoulder wouldn't have been unreasonable. But this? This was ... the word surreal came to mind.
Her brain screamed at her to just shake his hand and keep things professional. She didn't know if they would last, she didn't know if they would end up fired or transferred if anyone found out about them. She didn't know if she was willing to take that chance. She wasn't even back on active duty yet, she'd only come by the division to talk to him. She hadn't even been convinced that he would forgive her for what happened ... let alone this.
Andy opened her mouth to speak, but not words came out. As hard as she tried, nothing would penetrate the invisible barrier of her open mouth. Her actions would have to speak for her, but what would they say? How could she make this decision?
Did she love Luke? No. She didn't envision a future with him much longer. She had tried to stick it out, thinking that things would turn around. Not every relationship was easy, and they were bound to disagree every now and then. But when she closed her eyes at night, it wasn't Luke that was on her mind. Even after the catastrophe that was last night, Luke hadn't made an appearance in her dreams. She didn't think about him unless someone else brought his name up, or she saw him passing by. Passing by being the operative words. They hardly ever spent any time together anymore. They were basically only a couple by statement, not by actions. So, she didn't think that she would be staying with Luke. But did that mean she was willing to take a chance with Sam?
Andy hoped that he wouldn't get sick of waiting, and just turn and leave. It was too much to think about, too much to decide, but she didn't think she'd have all the time in the world.
Sam stood resolute, his hand still in the air.
The seconds ticked by, and Andy still hadn't made a move.
Dammit, just stop thinking so much, Andy! she berated herself. She couldn't let her head make this decision. This was a matter for the heart. It had led her astray many times before, but it was the only thing that she could count on. Because her brain was telling her how many ways that this could backfire, but her heart was singing a different song.
Things might end badly with Sam ... but they could end great. He could be the one. He could be the perfect guy for her, and she would never know until she took that plunge.
She was practically bouncing on the balls of her feet, struggling with herself. Closing her eyes, she slowly extended her hand. When she opened them again, her fingertips were inches away from Sam's, and though he tried to hide it, she could see the hurt in Sam's eyes. Her hand continued forward, and when it made contact with his, she closed her hand around his, feeling the roughness of his calloused skin.
Sam blinked, begrudgingly beginning to shake her hand, but Andy halted the movement.
She pulled him forward with her hand, closing the space between them. With a silent prayer that she was making the right choice, Andy stood up on the tips of her toes, sealing her lips over his.
Sam was surprised, but welcomed the kiss.
Their joined hands remained pressed between their bodies as the kiss grew, until finally Andy pulled back.
"I can't go any further until ..." she trailed off, not wanting to ruin the moment more than she already had.
Sam nodded his head in understanding. "Got it."
Her hand squeezed ever so slightly against his, looking up into his eyes. "But we're good?"
Sam nodded his eyes, returning the pressure. "We're good."
Andy smiled softly in relief, leaning forward to kiss him softly once more before leaving the room. Despite her nerves, she felt a weight lifted off of her shoulders. She didn't know what would come of her relationship with Sam, but she knew that if she didn't give it a shot, she would never forgive herself. Sighing, she made a beeline for Luke's office.
There were still a few things she needed to sort out.
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The end.
Well, what did you guys think? Like it, hate it?
In retrospect, it's good that they didn't get Sam and Andy together so quickly. The best relationships are the ones with the drawn out tension, and I SO want Sam and Andy to be one of TV's hottest couples.
Reviews are appreciated, flame if you must, but constructive criticism is much more useful.
Until next time ...!