Of Changing Winds and Emotions: Chapter 1
(Twilight is neither mine nor has it ever been. That right goes to Ms. Meyer. )
"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us."
- Helen Keller
Summary: To me love isn't a word to be thrown around for the hell of it, there should be meaning behind its use. Now if I just knew what love was my life would be significantly easier.
Taking in a deep breath I turned into Forks High's mildly full parking this is it, my first day of senior year and here I am feeling as if I'm gonna piss myself. Parking in the first available space I found putting my old Chevy into park while sighing and resting my head on the large steering wheel. 'Buck up Bella' I hissed aloud, 'You're gonna have to see him at one point or another so put your goddamn big girl panties on and march in there.'
Stepping out of my truck, pulling my bag along with me, I blinked as the rarely present sun graced lil' old Forks, Washington with it's presence. Almost wishing for my sunglasses that were still left at...his...house. While contemplating when or even if I would invest in another pair I noticed the small blur of my best friend, Alice, skipping out of the main building.
"Bel-la!" she sang as she came into earshot of me. Pivoting around from my customary parking lot scan I faced my oh-so-miniscule friend with an attempt at a smile.
"Hey Alice." I mumbled while being wrapping her tiny frame into a hug. It was less for her and more for an opportunity for me to have some sort of physical contact.
"You holdin' up ok?" she asked into my ear, her cool breath tickling my neck. "I know you say you're okay every time I ask but do me the favor of not bullshitting me this one time."
I shrugged in reply while setting her down, her eyes expressing her worry. She knew how I felt, hell, she always known exactly how I feel.
"It'll get better I guess." I mumbled half-heartedly before linking arms with her, stepping onto the curb and walking into the ever-dreary Forks High campus.
Conversations became hushed as the two of us walked through the outdoor siting area, I dared a glance up at my surroundings and received the exact sites I'd expected. Lauren Mallory looked on with a slight smirk playing on her overly makeup caked face, while to her right sat an over-joyous Jessica. "honestly," I mumbled to Alice, "you think they could have some tact."
"You do realize they need every spare braincell to seemingly function in life. I mean we really should pity them, that can't finish a sentence without using at least three 'likes'.Even if the sentence is four words, three of them are like." Alice deadpanned.
Looking at each other we burst into a fit of giggles as if we were back in elementary school.
Opening my mouth to reply I was cut off by a loud yell, coming from behind us, "Bells!" Jacob Black was running towards us from the car park where his trusty motorcycle, who he dubbed Lila, was waiting. Jake, the lucky bastard, goes to the Rez school who begins their year tomorrow.
As he neared I noticed the binder in his hand, a binder looking suspiciously like one of mine that held my summer work.
"You forgot this at my house yesterday." He said coming to a halt a foot in front of Alice and me. "I wasn't sure if you'd need it or not and..." he drifted off as I took the black binder from him and tucked it into my messenger bag.
"Thanks Jake" smiling as a dimpled grin erupted onto Jake's face. "I have a feeling I'd miss this in Chem. You're a life saver. I owe you."
"I'll take my payment in a kiss thank you very much." He smirked in a devilish way.
Rolling my eyes I turned his head to the side and pecked his cheek. "Moron." I laughed as he scooped me into a hug and placed a kiss on my cheek.
"Yes but I am your most favorite moron." He retorted, grin growing.
"Of course." I winked at Alice who was looking at us like we were
from mars or maybe pluto. After all Pluto needs more lovin' and lets be honest it sounds more exotic.
"If you two are done your little love-fest..." Alice paused giving us a playful glare, "Bella we need to get to class."
"Sorry Jake I'll see you after school? After all we need to work on my 'you know what'." I smirked knowing full well that would grate on Alice's nerves and it sounded just vague enough that she would think that we would be making the beast with two backs.
"Yep see you then Bells, Alice." he nodded to her before jogging over to Lila swiftly straddling her but then he stopped as an oh-so-familliar silver volvo turned into the parking lot.
I froze, feeling my body cool significantly.
"Futher mocker." Alice hissed and before I could even move she was on her way over to Jake, who looked as if he was rethinking the whole 'gotta go home' idea.
Trying to move my feet I felt frozen to my spot, he was here. Jake was here too, that was never a good combination especially now. Watching tiny Alice try to subdue our giant of a friend would probably be fuckin' hysterical at any time but now.
Alice seemed to whisper something to Jake that made him freeze and look at me, then to the silver volvo then to me again.
Fuck. He Knew. He knew. Shit. He knew what happened between me and ...him.
Turning to face Alice, Jake gave her a small nod before jamming his helmet on and kicking up Lila's kickstand before roaring out of the parking lot. My eyes following his form until he was on the road, then turning to scan the grounds I saw three pairs of eyes locked on me and it was evident that none of them were pleased.
I had called those behind the eyes family. My closest relationships in Forks along with Rose, Jake and Alice. Now they all held an obvious contempt for me.
Thankfully Alice's voice interrupted my thoughts,"Bella, com on let's just get to English, huh? We'll meet Rose there."
Rose. Yeah Rose. Hopefully she'll listen to me before ripping into me, again. Snorting to myself at the thought of Rose being tame about this situation was like asking for a multicolored pig to fall out of the sky and then be able to fly. Chances of that happening without the use of artificial coloring of course.
I resigned myself to Alice's direction and numbly began walking through the halls where I managed to catch little snippets of conversation here and there
"- she left him"
"I heard she cheated."
"I heard he hooked up with Tanya."
"A rez kid and she are dating."
Rolling my eyes for what seemed to be the millionth time this lovely morning I glanced to Alice. Her face was one of practiced calm, looking closer I saw her baby blue eyes blinking back a few cared for me more than anyone, including him, she never left my side as we meandered through the halls to Mr. Halls classroom. Taking stock of the seats available I was pleased to note Alice and I were among the first there. We chose the back right corner, while it was farthest from the door I only had two desks near me, Alice in one and hopefully Rose in the other.
"You told him." I deadpanned just loud enough for Alice to hear.
"I had to." She shrugged while shrugging off her bag and pulling out her notebooks.
"You don't have to do anything." I pouted, "In fact you relish in not doing something that's supposed to be necessary."
"True." she laughed." But I also didn't want Jake walking over there and starting another fight, he thinks you two just are on another off section, which usually means Tanya or some shit like that."
I glared at the name, I don't care how many times I hear it, I just can't help but have a negative reaction to the name.
"What'd he say?" I asked.
"You should know how he'd take it, he's happy as fuck. I swear that boy is seriously special, in that 'i like to eat paper way.'"Alice made a show of nibbling on her paper before making a face.
I smirked,"I personally prefer college-ruled."
Before we continued our seemingly pointless conversation a small group of classmates walked in. Among them being Mike Newton, Angela Weber, and Ben Cheney. Angela sent me a small wave and smile which I returned before she turned back to her long-time boyfriend Ben. Mike on the other-hand made his way back to our corner sliding into the desk in front of me.
"Bella, Bella, Bella." he tisked with a flirty smirk on his boyish face, "you look stunning, as per usual."
Who the fuck speaks like this I rolled my eyes internally. I mean really, one you're in High School, and two you are by no means Casanova. My internal monologue was cut off by Alice, "Mike, sorry but we're saving that seat for Rose, you know haven't seen her much. Sorry." Her fake sadness was absolutely horrible but I'm sure she knew that.
"Oh well if you're sure," He glanced at me asking for either a conformation or denial.
I shook my head at him,"Sorry."
"No worries, we'll catch up in gym yeah?" He asked as he slid out of his seat.
Without waiting for a reply he attempted to casually walk away, to the middle section where Jessica Stanley was sitting. She threw an evil little grin my way as if to say, 'see no guy wants you.' By all means she was welcome to Mike, hell I'd throw them a fucking congratulatory party if they did get together. One less straw on my overworked back.
I took a glance at the clock, 8:57 and change, in less than three minutes I will be held captive in a class with the one person I can no longer look in the eye.
Edward Cullen.
R/R lovies!
-Congo Sensi