This is just a cute little piece I thought of in bed the other night. Oh the things you think of when you can't sleep. I'm sorry if Nowaki or Hiroki seem out of character. I tried very hard to keep them the same but make this as fluffy and sweet as I could. So... Sorry for talking so long... Go ahead and read. :)

Truly Loved

Hiroki tossed and turned in bed. He never could sleep well without his giant boyfriend beside him. Lately Nowaki had been working extra at the hospital because they had transferred in some children with grave situations. So he returned home late at night and crawled into bed completely spent. Hiroki punched his pillow and rolled onto his chest. "Ridiculous. I'm a grown man and I can't sleep all because someone isn't with me. How old am I… 5?!" He sighed and glanced at the clock. "God knows when Nowaki will be home. Damn. It's getting late." He knew he had no work tomorrow, and he knew Nowaki would try to take the day off if so. "Is it wrong for me to hope for that? How selfish am I for wishing him here… Instead of with those unhealthy kids?" Before he realized it he was hugging Nowaki's pillow tightly to his chest. He breathed in the scent of his most precious person. Before he could register the embarrassing act he was committing his cell phone began to ring loudly on the bedside table.

The young assistant professor jumped at the phone but recognized the ring as Nowaki. "Hiro-san?"

"Do you know what time it is?" Hiroki said trying to keep the aggression and such from his voice.

"I'm sorry it's so late… But I have a favor to ask." He sounded different… His voice was gruff.

"Nowaki? Are you getting a cold?" Hiroki sat up straight and was still holding his pillow to his chest. The concern thickly laced his voice as he clutched the pillow.

"No… But… Would you please...? Come pick me up?"

There was something obviously wrong. Hiroki was up in an instant, "You're at the hospital?"

"Yes."

The brunette found some clothes and began throwing them on, "Don't move then… I'm coming. If you move Nowaki I swear!"

"No I won't move… Thank you Hiro-san… See you soon."

And Nowaki hung up the phone. This alarmed Hiroki to move a little faster. He somehow caught the last train and walked as fast as he could to the hospital Nowaki worked at. The tall man was sitting against the wall with his knees pulled to his chest. His head rested there and his shoulders were slumped. Hiroki felt his heart rate speed up and his pace picked up a little. He came to a stop in front of his large boyfriend and sighed, "Nowaki?"

The black haired man picked up his head and Hiroki could see the dried tear stained face. His lover rose to his full height and looked around before hugging him tightly, "Thank you so much Hiro-san."

Hiroki blushed extremely hard and hugged him back for a quick moment, "Is everything okay?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now." His eyes pricked with tears so Hiroki quickly dropped the subject and they began the long walk home. No one was out and about at this time of night so Nowaki took Hiroki's hand and they continued down the side walk.

Hiroki felt uneasy and he hated it. Nowaki sighed heavily and moved a little closer so their shoulders brushed occasionally. On the way home they made small talk for the most part or fell into silence. When they finally entered the apartment Hiroki just got the door closed and his shoes off before he saw Nowaki sink to his knees and bury his face in his hands. "Nowaki?!"

He came to kneel in front of his lover and tried to understand what had Nowaki sobbing like a child. "Hiro-san!" Nowaki stretched his arms and flung himself into the confused assistant professor. The older man didn't quite know what to do in this situation. Slowly he wrapped his arms around his lover and sat back on his butt.

His heart was beating rapidly and his mind was running, "No-Nowaki what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

He just shook his head into Hiroki's chest and held onto him tighter. It was probably ten minutes later when Nowaki finally calmed down and stopped crying. Hiroki's eyes scanned his face and he felt his boyfriend's head, "I'm not sick Hiro-san… And I'm not hurt or anything like that."

"Then what's wrong?" Hiroki said hating the way his heart was breaking at this sad face.

"A… A little girl was moved to my care… She was dying of a heart condition and she died in my arms tonight as I tried to revive her three times. I couldn't save her." He cried again and Hiroki without thinking hugged him back to his chest.

Desperately he tried to grasp how to make him feel better. He could… Just this once… And only this once… Be… Gah… Lovey dovey. "Nowaki?"

"Yeah?"

"Uh… I know this is a bad time… But… Would you take a… bath… with me?" Hiroki's face was red from chin to hairline.

Nowaki cocked his head, "Of course." But no visible smile was made.

They walked to the bathroom together and Hiroki began to fill the tub. He turned back and saw Nowaki unbuttoning his black shirt. "Let- Uh… Let me." That blush was firmly planted on his face as he moved his hands down the buttons and unbuttoned his pants. Then he left Nowaki to take his own pants off while he undid his tie.

"No. Hiro-san… I want to take off your tie." His big lug pouted moving closer now clad in only boxers. "And your shirt… And your pants, and your boxers." In his rush out the door Hiroki just put on his teacher attire out of habit.

"You're a pervert." Hiroki said blushing but letting his boyfriends hands wander where they like.

"I'm your pervert." Nowaki truly liked the way Hiroki was trying to make him feel better. He may hardly say that he loves him, or do such things all the time… But when he did… He knew how much effort Hiroki truly put into his actions.

Hiroki was stripped and when they got into the warm water they sat on either sides of the tub. Nowaki stretched his long legs a little and kept to the sides of the tub while Hiroki kept his legs close to his body and allowed Nowaki to stretch out. His blue eyes slipped closed and Hiroki admired his face for a moment. What was he going to say to him? Nowaki's first patient death… Hiroki had no idea how Nowaki was feeling. Maybe he could just… Cling to him while they slept? Would that make him feel better? Maybe not?

After Hiroki washed and truly bathed Nowaki he allowed the same to be done to him. "Um… I don't really know how to make you feel better… So I hope that… Uh… Doing this tonight will be enough to kind of help."

He felt his face blush again and lowered his eyes as Nowaki scrubbed his back. Leaning forward slightly the black haired man placed a kiss on the back of Hiroki's head, "It helps more than you know."

"I'm sorry I can't do more." Giving up on being so shy Hiroki decided to just let it go and not hold back what he wanted to say because it would sound childish to him. No, tonight he would say whatever he thought of first and make an excuse for it tomorrow.

After their bath was finished Nowaki dried his lover off and slipped him back into his sleeping clothes. Together they lay down in bed and stared at the ceiling. Their shoulders barely touched but found comfort in the even breathing of each other. A long silence seemed to stuff the air. Nowaki sighed and ran a hand over his face, "Perhaps I shouldn't blame myself so much."

Hiroki pursed his lips and thought for a long moment, "You did everything you could. So… You really shouldn't blame yourself so much… You always… You-You always do your best at your job and you have so many other patients to take care of… Um… So… Don't blame yourself."

A small smile did light Nowaki's face and he turned on his side, "Thank you very much Hiro-san."

"Nowaki?" Hiroki said timidly, "I'm col- Um… Will you hold me?" His face was flushed from chin to hairline as he said such an embarrassing thing.

Nowaki looked shocked for a moment before nodding and pulling the assistant professor to his chest and his arms. "Of course Hiro-san."

His face lost a small amount of red as he relaxed and submitted to being loved. "One more thing Nowaki."

"What is it Hiro-san?" Nowaki said tilting his head to gently rest it on Hiroki's.

"Nowaki… Maybe you shouldn't work so hard sometimes… I mean like… Take a day off more often. You- you always work so hard and you work so long. I mean… Your job is important and should always take precedence… But you are working so hard for so long that I'm concerned that it will start to deteriorate your health."

Nowaki had a soft look on his face, "Hiro-san… Do you get lonely without me here?"

For a moment Hiroki fought with himself for the words his heart longed to say, "Um… Yes… A little. How childish and selfish? You're working and following your dreams… Which is very admirable. I well… I'm very proud to stand beside you Nowaki… Um… If the world was different and this was more okay… I'd gladly marry you in a heartbeat."

"Hiro-san…" Nowaki said with a breathless voice.

The older male felt like he was going to die of embarrassment but if it meant making Nowaki happy… He'd spit it out. "So um… I can't really sleep well when you aren't here, and um… I love you Nowaki." Nowaki was crying again, he was holding his lover to his chest tightly. "Nowaki?" He managed to get turned around to face his large boyfriend.

Nowaki shook his head, "I'm crying because I'm so happy Hiro-san. You've made me so happy. I will try to spend every moment with Hiro-san from now on. I will do my best I promise. I love you Hiro-san!"

Hiroki buried his face into Nowaki's strong chest and punched him lightly, "You're my idiot Nowaki… Never change."

"Hiro-san…" Nowaki fell asleep quickly with drying tears on his face and Hiroki was left to admire his lover and examine his own happiness as well. The big lug had made such a difference in his life, and Hiroki couldn't imagine a day without him.

Sorry it's kind of short... It's just a little fluffy one shot. Um... Hope you liked it... Again my apologies if they seemed a little out of character. Um... Leave a review with comments and critiques... Try to be gentle this is my first ever yaoi and one shot. Thanks! :)