Dying for Life

by Shiruvia Phantomhive

Jamie wanted to live from outside. She wanted away from it all. So badly that she faked her own suicide . Hidden behind a mask of hair dye, contacts, makeup, and style. She changed her name and returned back to her old school and home town , to observe the reactions of the students . But will her discovery push her over the edge.

Dying For Life

Jamie wanted to live from outside. She wanted away from it all. So badly that she faked her own suicide . Hidden behind a mask of hair dye, contacts, makeup, and style. She changed her name and returned back to her old school and home town , to observe the reactions of the students . But will her discovery push her over the edge.

So much happened before i said goodbye to everyone and everything. Yes I was on the verge of suicide, but at the same time I wasn't. I wanted to give up and not have to deal with this crap that consonantly haunted me.

It was the first day of the last September of 5th grade and I was ready for school to be over. I hopped out of my mom's white Chrysler van and looked up to the school with my heart held high. I grabbed my sister from the car, bid my mother farewell and walked my little sister to her classroom.

"Are you excited Lilli? School's almost over!" I quizzed my 3rd grade sister excitedly.

She nodded and gave me a small smile, never once actually looking at me. She was always so quiet. I hated it. I smiled back and led her into her classroom, freeing my hand from hers. As I was walking out the door I watched Lilli skip up to her friends and laugh loudly. What could that child have against me? I was the only one she didn't talk to. I swatted the thought away and walked down the hallway quickly, hoping to get to class before the bell rang.

During math, right before lunch, the intercom came on over head it's usual annoying requests.

"Penny Winchester for check-out please" it spoke demanding. The boys snickered loudly and I heard one of them cough "loser"

I ignored their foolish remarks, aed up my things quickly and sprinted out the door towards the office. But not until I was tripped by one of the boys closer to the door and fell to the ground with a slam. I quickly got up, dusted my self off and continued running. I arrived to the office and swung open the door with source-less energy. I skipped up to my mom and smiled widely. She had been crying. Again. I saw a new bruise on her forearm and that curly hair wasn't in a neat little bun like it usually was. It was hanging at her droopy shoulders and seemed less lively.

"Hey Penny. We're going on a little adventure" She gave me a weak smile and I knew this wasn't going to be a normal adventure.

Lilli walked into the office and ran up to my Mother hugging her tightly. I turned and pushed open the office doors holding then open for my mother and Lilli .

An adventure she had told us.

I knew better

The entire back of the van was filled to the roof with clothes, pillows, blankets, snacks, games, and bags of essential needs.

We were gone a whole month

Until the police came.

An then the battle over custody, divorce, denial, confession, and worst of all. Being put in the middle

Its been a year since my parents divorced each other. My dad needed help desperately with taking care of my little sister and I, so in came Nana, his mother. I hated her. She hated me. Along with Nana, in came her husband, my Papa Bob. I loved Papa Bob! We had so much in common, we loved the same foods, same things to do. But little did I know that it was all a lie.

The first time it happened, I was on the computer. At the time it was a desktop facing the window. I played the usual little game for an hour or so. Well my Nana was preoccupied and my Dad was at work, Lilli was upstairs and Papa Bob was downstairs. I continued playing games when I heard shuffling behind me. I felt arms go around me and grab me. He whispered dirty things to me and touched me in a way no one should be ever touched. My body froze. I was terrified. I was a 10 year old girl for pete's sake! Leave me alone! but nothing came out of my mouth. Once he stopped and walked away, I ran up to my room, locking the door behind me, sat in the corner and cried myself to sleep. that may have been the first time but it wasn't the last. I kept my mouth shut out of pure weakness.

It happened in different ways after that. For 3 years straight. Until i snapped. I was now 13 and stronger. It happened one morning before school and the second time, I got to school and reported him. It was all a blur. Police at the house, DCF, my frustrated parents, Guidance counselors, but worst of all was the therapist. She thought I was depressed. No. I was fine. I wanted out that was all.

So I got out.

Blackness surrounded my lifeless body. My hair was mangled and a mess, clothing was ripped and dirty. I seemed to be barefoot and bloody. I looked to my blood stained hands and turned them over. Did I just kill myself? I turned to my left and looked into a body mirror. How did I kill myself? Why am I out of my blood? so many questions blogged my mind. But were quickly disrupted a blood curdling scream. My hands flew to my ears but the screaming was just as loud. Closing my eyes, sank to the black ground.

A sharp pain began to spread across my body and that's when I realized I was the one screaming. the pain grew and I couldn't stop screaming. I opened my eyes and looked to my lifeless body on the ground. It began to twitch and shake viciously. My screaming increased as though I couldn't control it.

I shot up out of my bed. My hair was plastered to the back of my neck and my breathing was heavy. I looked around me, my sheets and pillow were thrown all around Me. I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom across the hallway. It was only a dream Penny. Calm down. I stripped from my sweaty pajamas and jumped into the shower.

Once out of the shower, I quickly threw myself together, deciding in the progress to be superman themed today. . . . . I let my straight brown hair fall down my shoulders.

Throwing my backpack over my shoulder, I trudged downstairs in search of my little sister. Dad had already headed to work so it was just me and Lily getting ready for school. I lingered at the bottom of the stairs for half a second deciding weather or I wanted breakfast. I decided I would and walked down the hallway to the kitchen. As i walked through the door, I noticed a note on the fridge.

Penny and Lilli,

I'll be out for a while after work so I left 20 dollars on the counter for you two to get dinner, behave yourselves while I'm gone and be nice to each other.

love, Dad

I huffed out and crumpled up the note to throw it in the garbage but stopped when I heard a noise behind me. I swiftly turned around to see Lilli standing at the counter watching me. I scowled at her and held up the bawled up note for her to see.

" Dad went out again so we've got to get dinner." I gripped the paper tight "Another secret girlfriend." I mumbled under my breath.

Lilli quietly nodded and headed out the kitchen quickly. i watched as she exited and knew she was just trying to get away from me. I chuckled the wasted note at the trash can and watched as it landed perfectly in the bin. I continued staring after the note, wondering if he would ever be a normal dad like he used to be.

I swatted the thought away and exited the kitchen, ignoring my whining stomach. Grabbing my house keys from the wall and my skateboard, I threw the door open and exited swiftly.

I stumbled out on to the sidewalk, peering around me to make sure no one saw me make a fool of myself by tripping. As I straightened myself out, I could hear the bus in the distance, slowly making its way to its stop. I hopped on my board and skated as fast as i could to the stop sign at the end of the road, not caring about my hair anymore. I watched the doors of the school bus beginning to close slowly.

"WAIT!" i cried out, I reached out to the bus, merely a few yards from its doors.

The doors stopped and opened abruptly. I came to a stop in front of the doors, picked up my board, and ran up the little steps to the platform. I looked at everyone around me, who has stopped talking and were now giving me their full attention.

"Loser" I heard a boy fake cough. I ignored him and made my way to the back of the bus quickly, but not before i was tripped by an intercepting foot. I felt myself fall, and waited the impact of the metallic, cold flooring. But it never came. I looked up to see a boy holding my shoulders to prevent my fall. His beautiful brown eyes were full of sorrow and mourning. His blonde side swept hair was complemented by a 'Obey' snap back. He reminded me of someone that should be obsessed over by girls and not helping me.

I gave him a slight smile, adjusted my board under my arm, stood up quickly and continued making my way to the back of the bus. Once finding my usual seat, I threw my backpack and board down and slammed my earbuds in, to block out the annoying voices around me. I stared out the bus window, attempting to clear my mind.

A tap on my shoulder intruded my impending thoughts. I looked to find the same boy who helped me, sitting next to me. I took my earbuds out and placed them in my lap.

"Hi" I greeted him quietly, trying not to draw any attention to myself.

"Hey, I'm really sorry you have to deal with these bastards" He gave me a little smile that made me bubble inside.

I looked down at my hands and began playing with the wire to my ear buds.

"It's no big deal to me as much as it used to be." He placed his hand over mine, quieting my fidgeting.

"No one should have to get used to bullying. Especially someone that has had to go through what you did." I looked up at him and gawked.

I stared at him open mouthed, replaying his last words in my head over and over again. " Especially someone that has had to go through what you did."

I watched as he got up from beside me and I retreated to his previous seat, as though nothing had happened. I couldn't shake the feeling that this kid knew something about me that I didn't!

My school was now in view. Trident Jr./ Sr. High School. Home of the sluts, jocks, and the geekiest of the geeks. I smirked to myself, knowing today would be different.

The bus came to an abrupt stop, letting ids out at the entrance of the school. I waited until every kid was off, until slowly making my way off of the ride to hell. I looked up to the school, huffing out a frustrated breath, hoping today would go by quickly.

"Hey! Penny the Pimple head! Move it!" I winced at the name calling, made by an obvious jock head. I swiftly moved to the side, letting him pass and hopped on my board, skating to the doors quickly, dodging any on coming people.

I skated past a guy attempting to flirt with a girl leaving the doors. I chuckled under my breath and skated past, into the school. I approached my locker and hopped off my board swiftly. I banged my fist into my locker, sending it flying open. A few hate notes fell out. Probably telling me to kill myself or crap like that. I picked up the notes off the floor, that fell out of my locker and read through them. A few death threats, fake crush notes, etc. My fingers slid across the surface of a note neatly folded and tucked into an envelope.

I looked at it closely and decided to keep it and read it later. I shoved the note into my text book and placed it in my locker. I threw the rest of the notes away, into the trash can right next to my locker. I slammed my locker shut and heading to class as the bell rang.

As i walked down the halls, I couldn't stop thinking about the note. I looked to the floor as i walked to the second level of the school, to Language Arts. I continued to stare at the floor, as I came to the top of the stairs, but I was suddenly falling backwards and down the stairs. Everything felt like it was in slow motion, my hands instinctively flew to the back of my head to prevent any serious damage to it. I felt the back of my legs hit the tiles first, knowing there would be a huge bruise later. I felt arms wrap around my stomach before my upper back could come in contact with the cold tile. Both, the person and I went flying to the floor but with loss of an impact. I opened my eyes which I apparently closed, and looked down at the hands holding me around my stomach. They loosened as I stood up and found the same boy that saved me on the bus earlier, lying on the floor with a bloody nose. I inwardly smiled and bent down beside him, he looked up at me and smiled a toothy grin, causing blood to run into his mouth.

"Your nose is bleeding" I pointed out, helping him off the floor. And smiling at him

"Can you take me to the clinic?" He looked me in the eyes and pleaded.

"Only if you tell me why you helped me twice this morning" I smiled and crossed my arms to my chest.

He smiled weakened and he gave me a serious look

"Sometimes. We all need someone to help us up when we have fallen" and with that, he headed to the clinic

I was not sitting in the clinic, clearly late for class by a hefty 10 minutes. I looked over to mystery boy, who was being helped by the nurse. Apparently, when he fell, my head smashed his nose, breaking it. I was pretty upset that I hurt him, but he kept telling me that it was okay, that it was just an accident and he'll be fine.

"You know, I never actually got your name." I looked at him. The nurse ignored our conversation for the most part.

He smiled and looked over the nurse hand and at me. He winced.

"I'm Christian. And I already know your name" He smirked at me, but quickly disappeared as he winced.

"How on earth can you know my name when we have never meet?" I asked him, raising my eyebrow

"Believe it or not, but you're pretty popular" I couldn't help but burst out laughing, to what he had just said.

" HAHA sure. Whatever you say Christian" I crossed my arms and leaned back into my chair.

He stayed silent for the remainder of the time, until the nurse was finished bandaging his nose.

"Alright, be careful next time and get out of my office" She smiled, letting us know she was just joking.

"It's fine, I'll be fine I promise." He smiled at me "I'm sorry for making you late to your class"

I shrugged as we began to climb the steps to the second level a second time. I held the railing the entire time way up, so I don't break something else of Christian's.

"It's fine. I'll be fine" I mocked his tone and made a funny face

He laughed as we came to the top of the stairs.

"Shouldn't you get to class Christian" I stopped walking in front of the door to my class and turned my attention towards him.

"I wanted to walk you to class and make sure you don't try to kill someone else." He smirked at me

As i turned my attention to the door in the back of me and placed my hand on the cold door knob, i slowly turned around one more time to face Christian.

"Thanks for walking me. And helping me up when I feel. .. . twice." He smiled back and wrapped his arms around me, giving me a hug. I was hesitant at first but decided to return it, after all he did save my life. We broke apart and I could feel my face heat up and my face flushing at the same time.

He gave me one last smile and turned down the hallway, making his way to class. I looked after him, hoping I would see him again soon. I turned around and placed my hand on the knob once again, took a deep breath and walked inside.

As I walked in, I got a few stares, a short lecture from my teacher, explaining how much time I've wasted and that she wanted to see me after class. I shuffled to my seat, luckily not getting tripped. I pulled out my notebook and a pencil and began writing today's future events down.

I banged my locker open, and shoved my books in, retrieving my skateboard. School went by so slow than i wanted it to. I didn't see Christian again for the rest of the day, and it truthfully saddened me. I knew I wouldn't see him again after today. Well, at least not as myself. I pushed the thoughts away and walked to the bus, ignoring my skateboard that I couldn't ride. I stared at the floor as I walked onto the steps of the bus, no one was on yet so I made my way to the back and threw myself down, slamming in my headphones and staring out the window, into my own little world. I smiled at the song that was playing in my headphones. I hummed the lyrics to "Fell" by Sleeping with Sirens not caring that people could hear me. As people finished loading, the bus took off, I looked around the tops of the seats for Christian. I frowned with no luck in finding him so I could say goodbye in my own little way. As the bus came to a complete stop at the end of my street, I got off quickly to avoid tripping again.

I watched as the bus rolled away, listening to the obnoxious voices disappearing into the distance. I threw my skateboard down and took off down quietly down the street. I hopped of my board and walked up the steps and into the house. The house was quiet as usual when I got home, Lilli didn't get home until late, and Dad was at 'Work' all day. I had the house to myself, just the way I liked. I ran up to my room and threw my stuff by my door, grabbing the bag I kept all of my supplies in; hair dye, make up, glasses, ect... I ran into the bathroom across the hall and began working on my hair. My hair was naturally light brown and straight. So I planned on dying it raven black. After applying the hair dye to my hair, I tied it into a bun and let it soak in.

Thoughts clogged my head. Do you really want to do this? Why now? What about your dad? Lilli? The rest of your family? How long can you keep it up before you crash? I felt guilty for leaving them, but part of me knew that they'd be fine without me. I looked into the mirror and shuddered at the image of my self. I had dark circles under my eyes, tears stains on my cheeks. I hadn't realized i was crying. Guilt and Depression washed over me for a mere second before I heard a knock from the door. I felt panic rise in my chest, but composed myself before running down stairs and to the front door, opening it slowly. I was shocked to find Christian standing before my eyes.

He wore the same clothes as earlier in the day, but his facial expressions had drastically changed. He wore a face of sadness and pain. His brown eyes traveled my body, inspecting me closely, until they landed on my hair colored dye.

"penny what are you doing?" He asked quietly, his voice cracking a little at the end.

I looked at the floor, not wanting to fess but not knowing what else to say.

"Don't do this" I heard a voice beg. My head shot up and anger overwhelmed me.

"You don't know what it's like. Going through what i have. It kills people. But not me. Do you have any idea how hard I've worked to fight suicide? And if this-" I pointed to my hair " is how I get out of hell. So be it!" I jabbed his shoulder with my ringer roughly.

He looked taken back and I couldn't help but feel a little guilty I talked to him like that. But he needed to hear it.

"Where are you staying then" He crossed his arms and leaned on the door frame.

I opened my mouth to answer but closed it when I came to realize that I actually didn't have anywhere to stay when I would be returning to school. I thought out everything and yet, the simplest little mistake made this plan fall apart.

I looked to the floor, causing a piece of hair dye to fall onto my nose. I felt a hand reach out to the piece of hair dye and felt it being tucked onto the back on my ear, making me flinch and look up. Christian was still standing in front of me, he smirked dropped and his face was unreadable.

"Let me help you" He pleaded

I looked away crossing my arms.

"Penny you can't do this alone." He took a step into my house, which caused me to take a step back and drop my arms.

I sighed and turned to walk further into my house, motioning to Christian to come in and close the door. I listened as the door closed quietly and Christian followed me upstairs, into my room. Once in my room, I turned to him and told him everything.

"Okay. So first of all. I'm working on my new appearance at the moment, I already have a new backpack, school crap and I registered my self as 'Victoria Greath' to the school system. I planned on making it look like i too pills, left a note and ran. I put a lot of work into this plan. and I'm trusting you with this." He nodded his head, showing he understood.

"Everything was pretty much planned out until I forgot about a place to stay. this experiment is supposed to be fake suicide and I don't need my family to know." I looked around instinctively. I had never actually said the plan out loud and it made me nervous.

"You can stay at my house" Christian blurted out

I snapped my head over at him and raised my eyebrow.

"What about your parents? And shouldn't you be convincing me not to do this?" I crossed my arms and glared at him.

"Well I only have a little brother and my parents are on a 3 month business trip together" He smirked at me "Do you want me to convince you to not do this? Personally I think it'll be interesting" He smiled

"Truthfully, I don't think you could convince me" I smiled back and suddenly remembered my hair dye.

"Dammit!" I pushed past Christian and ran into the bathroom.

I stripped from my shirt, to prevent the dye from staining my favorite shirt, and tipped my head over the sink and began rinsing the dye from my hair. The cold water felt nice against my heated scalp. Once I finished rinsing out the hair dye and shampoo along with conditioner, I got a nearby towel and began drying my hair. I began walking across the hallway into my room, when I bumped into Christian in the hallway, sending me to the ground with him on all over my body. I felt completely flustered and remembered I didn't have a shirt on. I stared at his brown eyes for a second before pushing him off me.

You really know how to make a good impression" I yelled over my shoulder, running into my room and throwing on a random t-shirt from my drawer.

I threw the towel into the dirty clothes in the corner of my room and looked at my dark raven hair in the mirror. I was shocked to find that the hair dye made my skin very very pale.

"Please tell me your descent" He peeked between two fingers.

I laughed and threw a nearby pillow at him, he caught it and threw it back. I blocked it and pointed to my hair.

"Look at it i look like a freaking ghost" I sighed and put my forehead to the wall.

I felt Christian put a hand on my shoulder. I looked over at him, not taking my forehead off the wall.

"It's fine you look different that's what you wanted didn't you, come one lets just finish up here so we can get out of here okay Penn-Victoria" He corrected himself and smiled

I got up from the wall and smiled.

Lets get this over with.

Christian and I had finally finished my make over. It took a few hours, but it was worth it. I spilled a bottle of painkillers out on a notebook, leaving the notebook open with a note saying why I committed suicide and drowned in a nearby river a few streets over. I thought everything out pretty well.

Christian and I were now walking to his house, making sure I was well hidden by one of my that stood before me.

It was an amazing house. Made out of bricks and glass, I never would've guessed lived here. It had a large driveway and a garage and a big porch. I smiled at the house, thinking of how amasweatshirts. he had told me his house wasn't far, because after all, he walked here himself. I didn't know how he knew so much about me. But there was something about him that made me trust him.

With my duffel bag slung over my shoulder, my skateboard in my hand, and a hoodie over my head, I felt pretty hidden. Almost like a secret. As we walked out my neighborhood and down the street, I spotted Lilli's bus driving by. Panic spread through my body as i ducked behind Christian as an attempt to hide. I caught Lilli's eye at the bus rode by, but luckily she looked away without a thought to it.

I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding and returned to my original walking spot. Christian gave me a questionable side glance and opened his mouth to talk but before he could, I interrupted him.

"Don't" I stated simply, looking ahead as we walked

He closed his mouth and turned his head away, looking forwards. We walked in silence for the remainder of the walk. It was comfortable silence, snapping me out of my thoughts.

Christian stopped abruptly, but I continued walking, still lost in my thoughts. Christian grabbed my sleeve and pulled me towards him roughly, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"This is it" e spoke to me quietly, looking at the house with disgust. I looked up at a 2 story house zing it looked compared to mine.

Not noticing Christian was already up the driveway and opening the door, I snapped out of my trance and ran across the grass to the door.

"Thanks" I mumbled to Christian as I passed him through the door and into his house.

I looked around, smiling at the entry of it. It might look breath taking from the outside but the inside seemed so comfortable and cozy.

"It's not much" Christian stated, standing next to me, looking around as well "But it's my home"

"Its perfect" I smiled. Looking over at him. He looks at me with a smile.

"Let me show you around." he held out his hand and i gladly took it as we roamed his house.

Once we finished exploring the house and meeting his little brother Connor, he lead me up the stairs to where I would be staying. It was quite a large room, which was a guest room right across from Christian's room. It was nice, i knew I'd love it. It had a Queen bed in the center against the wall and two nightstand on each end of the bed. A large Dresser and a body mirror arranged around the room, not to mention and walk in closet and its very own bathroom. I loved it!

"Well I hope you enjoy your stay at the Craigen Manor." I turned around and smiled at Christian.

"So that's your last name? Craigen?" He nodded and smiled "I like it"

He laughed and went into his room, coming back with a few blankets and pillows for the bed.

"It's getting late, you should probably get ready for bed" He smirked

"Okay, Mom" I mocked him as he threw the blankets and pillows.

I put my stuff in front of my dresser and threw the blankets and pillows on my bed. Deciding I need a glass of water, I walked across the hall into Christian's room. The door was closed, not thinking, I opened the door revealing Christian stripped down to his boxers. I stood there gasping at him. His back was perfectly tanned and toned with muscles. His back was to me, so i gently closed the door and ran downstairs into the kitchen. Looking through the cabinets for a glass. I looked through every cabinet and finally found them in the very last cabinet, of course on the very top shelf.

Being the idiot I am, I got up on the counter on my knees and reached for the glass carefully. But of course, I lost my balance, sending me plummeting to the tile floor. Well at least until Christian caught me from falling the stunning 3rd time today. I couldn't help but in weirdly groan. I was such an idiot! He gently set me down and closed the cabinet.

"I feel like i should babysit you." He smirked at me as he went to another cabinet, grabbed a glass, filled it with water and handed it to me.

I stuck out my tongue out at him and took the glass, taking a sip. He was now wearing gym shorts and a t-shirt. My brain put him back in just boxers and I couldn't help but burst out laughing.

Christian gave me a weird look and chuckled a little.

I ran back upstairs, sure to thank Christian for saving me once again. I closed my door quietly and set my glass down on my nightstand. I lied down on my bed, getting comfortable and quickly falling asleep.

So this is what Home feels like.

"Penny" I heard someone say my name

"Penny get up!" I rolled over my mouth muffling my screams. I looked over to find Christian, his face caused the memories to come flooding back. He removed his hand from my mouth and wore a worried expression. I gave him a weak smile and got off the bed.

"Sorry. Forgot my place." I rubbed my forearm and apologized. Christian smiled.

"It's fine. My little brother is sleeping though" He exited my room. I followed behind, into his brothers room.

As we went into his brothers room, I could tell by the way Christian looked at Connor that he really cared for min. Most brothers would kill each other in a battle to death, but it seemed like these two were really close. I smiled and leaned against the doorframe, watching as Christian talked to Conner back to sleep. I backed up as Christian came out of Connor's room.

"You're a really good brother you know that." I smiled at him

"Thanks" He mumbled and smiled at me.

I remember when Lilli and I were little, I always thought Lilli hated me. I cried about it sometimes, being so upset that my only sibling refused to talk to me. But eventually I got over it, realizing that crying about it wouldn't help anything. When my mother and father divorced, my dad refused to let her see us. Lilli had refused to talk to me and only me, ever since mom had left. I new that day would come when it would stop. But it would take some time. and now I couldn't stand either of them. Married or not.

Christian put a hand on my shoulder, and gave me a weak smile. I felt a tear slip from my eye. I hadn't noticed i was crying. I quickly wiped away my free falling tears and smiled at Christian, letting him know i was fine.

"What time is it?" I asked, noticing it was dark outside.

"Its 5 o'clock in the morning." He sighed " You we mumbling in your sleep and I wanted to make sure you were okay"

I nodded and took his hand on my shoulder gently.

"Today's Tuesday right?" I asked, running a hand through my tousled hair.

"As of right now, that is correct." He tapped his wrist, pretending there was a watch there.

"Okay, well Victoria Greth starts school tomorrow." I smiled at the thought. But I still wondered what my Dad and Sister thought about my disappearance and 'suicide' when they got home. Did Lilli react? How did my Dad feel? I felt overwhelmed by the amount of question that bombarded my mind.

"I could skip school tomorrow and help you perfect things" He smirked "If you forgot about somewhere to stay. What else could you have forgotten?"

I waved my hand in the air, trying to add to the effect that I didn't want him skipping.

"You really don't need to skip for me. I mean your parents would probably get upset." I explained, trying to convince him.

"Well, I mean, my parents would be okay with one day." He countered.

I tapped my chin, thinking this thoroughly.

"Are you sure?" I asked, eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, totally" He reassured me, adding a wink at the end.

I sighed and looked up at him he was one of a kind really. But I couldn't help wonder what motivated him to help me in the first place.

"Alright" I mumbled. Look down to the floor, wondering if I made the right decision.

He nodded and walked into my room, shutting the door behind me. I leaned up against the door and let myself slide down. All of the days thought overtook my mind. But suddenly, only one remained.

What did I get myself into?

I walked through the deserted halls of my high school, wondering where everyove had gone. I continued looking in every crevice of the place. Where did everyone go? I thought hard, but was quickly disrupted by a blood curdling screaming coming from the other side of the hall. I whipped my head towards the sound to find a booy hanging in the air, chest forward, head back, and hands extended out at his sides. I was too far away to see who it was, so I began to run towards him. And the closer I came, the more I wanted to run further away. His screaming pierced my ears. It hurt me to see this boy like this. I was now so close I felt like I was going to go deaf. My breath hitched in my throught when i realized who it was, Christians mangled body now hung before me, his screaming like acid to my ears. I couldn't stand seeing him like this.

My legs felt like Jell-O and I could no longer stand. I dropped to my knees and covered my ears, trying to block out the sound. I looked at him and forced myself to jump onto his floating body. We went to the floor with a crash. I got up on my hands over his body, checking to see if he was okay. I tried to speak but no sound was coming out. Suddenly, he looked at me and began to slowly crumble beneath me.

"NO!" i screamed

I shot up from my bed, gasping for air. Another Nightmare. Only a Nightmare...I kept repeating this to myself, slowly getting up from my bed and walking into the hallway. Light streamed through the windows and the house was completely silent. I walked up to Christian's closed door and slowly turned the handle. I pushed the door open quietly and peered in. Christian's bed was empty and panic slowly ran through my body.

I quickly ran down stairs into the kitchen, grabbing a glass of water, trying to calm myself down. But a note on the fridge caught my eye. I walked up to it and read it closely.

Penny,

I left for school, so try not to fall while i'm gone. Conner is at school as well, so you have the house to yourself, be careful and don't break anything.

-Christian

Everything suddenly made sense. He wasn't in his bed because he was at school. I let out a deep breath and but my glass down. I leaned against the counter and regained my sense. I took a deep breath and stood up straight, walking up to my room quietly. I was still a little shaken from my nightmare, but I managed to make my bed quickly and neatly. I got my bag from in front of my dresser and began unpacking, organizing everything the way i liked it. I put all of my essentials and school supplies in my new backpack and hung it on my bedpost. Once I finished, I grabbed a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and started the shower in my bathroom. After peeling from my dirty clothes, I carefully jumped into the warm water. I noticed the bathroom was already stocked with all of the washing essentials. I silently thanked Christian and stared at the wall.

I stood there letting the water run over my shoulders and down my back, taking in big deep breaths trying to relax myself. After finishing my bathroom routine, dressing and combing my hair, I grabbed my notebook out of my backpack on my bedpost and sat on my bed. I began flipping through the pages of the notebook, reading and rereading all of the details of the plan. I planned to stay at the school for a few months or more. And thought I'm one to keep quiet, I will gradually try to change the school for the better and see if they truly ignored me or if I was just being paranoid. Having no friends except Christian, I wouldn't have to worry about people recognizing me and revealing my true identity.

I began jotting down new ideas to gradually change the school, but came up short. I decided to move to a different location in the house, maybe getting inspiration from a different surrounding. I hopped downstairs and decided to sit in the living room on the longer couch, of the two they have. I plopped down on the couch and laid down, propping my head up on a pillow and holding my notebook in my face to write. I looked around the room, trying to find some inspiration. I set on a picture of Christian, Conner and I'm guessing their parents.

They were all hugging and smiling. His mother had the most beautiful long, straight brown hair with blonde highlights. She looked like a fit woman, most likely a yoga teacher, or something along those lines. His father was very handsome. His blonde hair was styled perfectly, and his smile was one of a kind. He was a buff man, built up but not to much. Christian and Conner defiantly took after their father. But something I noticed was they all had the same shade of brown eyes. They were gorgeous and bright. This was a typical family, and a very beautiful one at that.

I felt my eyelids slowly begin to close as I tried to fight off my drowsiness

I woke to the sound of the front door closing and keys jingling. I sat up quickly, causing my notebook to fall to the floor in the process. I stretched slowly and stood up.

"Afternoon, Penny" I heard Christian's voice. I looked over to the front.

"Afternoon Christian how was school?" I smiled

Christian's smile disappeared and he shrugged.

"Boring. Nothing has been said about your disappearance and suicide yet. I don't think your Dad hasn't made the announcement yet" He gave me a serious look.

I felt a pang of disappointment and quickly pushed it away and put on a fake smile.

"Okay" I said happily, trying to hide the disappointment hidden underneath.

Christian could sense the fakeness in the smile and walked up to me, hugging me tightly.

I held him longer than I should. But I guess he didn't mind, we kind of just stood there in his living room, hugging.

He pulled away, but held my shoulders. He gave me a smile and let go.

"I've got to go pick up Conner from the bus stop." He turned away,dropping his backpack on the coach.

"I can pick him up if you want." I offered quickly, not thinking before I spoke. I mentally face palmed.

"No it's fine. You don't need to be recognized too early anyway." He looked at me, frowning.

"I'll put on my fake glasses and my hoodie. Come on i want to go" I begged him.

"Fine you can you. But i'm coming with you, just to make sure you don't get hurt or get him hurt." he smiled

I stuck out my tongue, but then returned the smile and ran upstairs. I grabbed my Converses, hoodie, and fake glasses.

I hopped back downstairs and grabbed Christian's hand, running out of the house the the bus stop.

Kristen and I have been sitting on the curb by the bus stop for sometime now, waiting for his little brother Connor spice to roll up. I sat silently" it with my thumbs, staring down and tried intensely. As I sat there, I felt the tension rising in my chest. This things I haven't got completely filled and I knew it would come back to bite me. And sure enough it's it.

I pulled on the hoodie on my head, pulling it down a little further as the bus pulled up. I set up quickly incline onto this top sites. I skin the bus windows for familiar faces, I felt your take Obama as Lily's eyes start but it back into my. Her expression was plain and I knew that she would tell dad she saw someone just like me, triggering his feelings. Or at least, I would hope. As Connor got off, he ran into my legs hugging me and smiling at me. I looked down at the little blonde and gave him a weak smile, gently sending him to Christian.

The bus doors closed and it took flight, Lily's eyes watched me. I turned to Christian gave him a sarcastic smile.

"Well, I recently found out that Connor and Lily go to the same school." I picked up a rock off the ground and threw it as hard as I could down the street after the bus, which was too far down the road to notice.

"Christian, what's wrong with Victoria?" Conner asked Christian loudly, sending guilt thought all my body.

Being only 6, Conner was a smart boy. He has so much Christian in him, I thought they were fraternal twins. And going to the same school as Lilli would be a problem. I couldn't pick him up from the bus stop without being properly hidden. I looked at Christian, who was giving me a concerned look. I ignored it and listened to Christian's next words.

"Victoria is just a little broken, that's all. Would you like to help put her back together?" Christian said quietly

Connor nodded his head and took hold of Christian's hand. We began walking back to the house, and I felt Conner's little hand grab mine. I smiled down at him and gave his hand a light squeeze.

The short walk back consisted mostly of Connor telling us about his bay had went and how a little girl stuck a glue stick up her nose and had to be sent to the nurse's office because it was so far up her nose.

"What did you so today Victoria?" Conner asked me, tugging on my hand. I looked down at him and smiled.

"I fell asleep and woke up to your big brother Christian" Conner looked to Christian then back to me.

"That sounds boring" He said plainly. I laughed and poked Christian's shoulder, causing him to smile.

"I don't know, it wasn't too boring" I smiled to myself and stared at the ground as we walked.

We walked in comfortable silence the rest of the way to the house. Just as Christian unlocked the door and opened it Conner threw a surprising question at me.

"Victoria?" Connor asked.

"Yes Conner?" I smiled and looked down at him as we walked in, taking his backpack off and hanging it by the door.

"Do you like Christian?" Conner asked, looking at me innocently. I opened my mouth to speak but quickly closed it.

"Well of course, your brother and I are very good friends." I looked at Christian and smiled. He smiled back and walked into the kitchen, leaving Connor and I alone.

" I mean do you like like him?" Conner whispered to me. I smiled at him and crouched down next to him.

" I don't think that way of him. I think him and I are just really good friends." I smiled and tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.

Connor nodded and ran up stairs into his room. I walked into kitchen, finding Christian standing at the counter with a glass of water, staring at me as I walked in.

"What?" I asked, getting a glass out of the cupboard, avoiding the ones higher up.

"Oh nothing, just thinking that since I'm going to skip tomorrow with you. I'm gonna watch some movies." Christian said, looking into his glass.

I raised an eyebrow at him and smiled.

"And I need to know this because?" I questioned him, hoping he would get the response I wanted.

"Well, I figured you would probably want to watch some with me tonight as well." Christian looked at me and smirked.

I smiled and filled my glass up with water, leaning against the counter next to him while sipping the water.

"Sure." I said simply, taking another sip from my water.

After feeding Conner dinner and helping him go to sleep, Christian and I got out our pajamas and snuck downstairs into the living room, leaving the lights off and turning the volume on the T.V. down low and sitting down.

"So what do you want to watch?" Christian and I were sitting a coach apart, trying to ease the awkwardness between us.

I shrugged and grabbed a blanket hanging over the back of the couch.

"Something action filled, or scary" I curled my legs under me on the tiny couch and snuggled into the blanket.

Christian nodded and pulled out an unfamiliar movie, pushing the disc into the player and pushing play.

"what are we watching?" I asked drowsily, fighting sleep.

"You'll see" Christian smiled, laying down on the couch.

I sighed and began twiddling with my thumbs, looking up on occasion to see what was going on. A flash of lightning lit up the windows and was followed by a boom of thunder and heavily rain. I looked over to Christian who looked sound asleep, so I got up and went over to him, putting my blanket over him and turning the T.V. off.

"Penny" I heard Christian's faint voice behind me as I was staring at the blank T.V. screen, deep in thought.

I turned around and bent down next down to his face, listening to him as he talked in his sleep.

"Stop. Don't. Penny put down the-" The rest of the sentence faded away as Christian silenced. I sighed and tucked the blanket up to his chin, and placing a nearby pillow under his head to comfort him.

"Goodnight Christian" I whispered, combing the hair out of his face with my fingers and standing up.

As I walked up stairs, another flash of lightning shown through the windows lighting up the windows in the living room. I shuddered at the crackling sound of thunder and walked down the hallway, peering into Connor's room to make sure he was okay.

I searched the dark room and vaguely came upon Christian's brown eyes. I walked in and sat on the bed next to him, brushing his blonde hair out of his face.

"You alright ?" A flash of lightning lit up his windows, sending him curling up next to me.

I could feel him shake his head, answering my question silently. I smiled and helped him up. I crawled into his bed with him, snuggling with him. I put the covers over him and held him tight next to me. It wasn't long until I heard his heavily breathing, signaling that he was asleep. I smiled and then I too, fell asleep happy.

I woke to the smell of bacon and toast. I pushed the blankets away from me and realized I was in Christians room. Without Christian. I smiled, remembering last night. I stretched loudly and stood, glancing at the gloomy outdoors through his windows. I never would have thought that Christian was afraid of Thunder, I mean i was at one point, I guess he just never go over it.

I ran my fingers through my rustled hair and walked downstairs, letting the smell of breakfast led me to the kitchen. As I walked in, I smiled at the tasty fumes filling my nose.

"Morning" I heard Christian say bubbly. I turned to him, trying my hardest not to look at his shirtless chest. I returned the smile, noticing that Christian had bed hair.

I started laughing, causing Christian to give me a funny loo. I opened the Microwave, which was placed above the stove and opened the door to it, so Christian could see his reflection.

Christian got the memo and looked into the microwave door and he shrieked, his hand flying to his hair trying to fix the mess. I couldn't stop laughing. I held onto the counter with one hand and my stomach with the other, laughing hysterically.

"Your...Face...Was...Priceless!" I said between laughs. Christian dropped his hands from his still messy hair and punched me playfully in the shoulder.

I stood up straight, recovering from my laughter and noticed the closeness between Christian and I. I looked at him as he stared back at me, both of our faces expressionless.

"Here, let me help you." I stepped a little closer and began to straighten out Christians hair.

I felt Christian's eyes on me the entire time, so I couldn't help but smile. Once i finished, I stepped back and viewed my work. It wasn't any better really, but all of the knots were out, so I felt pretty accomplished.

"Thanks." Christian smiled. turning back to the stove and putting the food on plates.

He turned around and handed me a plate and fork with a smile. i smiled back as we went over to the dining room table, I gathered Christian's empty plate and took it into the sink, and began rinsing them off.

"I'll get it, you go get dressed. We have a long day ahead of us." I heard Christian behind me. I turned to him and smiled.

"Did you already take Conner to school?" I asked, walking out of the kitchen.

"Yeah. I'll see you in a few." I nodded to myself and ran upstairs into my room.

After running the brush through my now back hair and throwing a random outfit, I hustled downstairs with my notebook, plopping myself down on the couch.

I felt the couch sink in next to me as a still shirtless Christian sat down and leaned over my shoulder to see what i was doing.

I handed him the note book and began going over the details of the next few months.

"Okay, so is that everything?" I asked for the third time. I couldn't believe how many flaws I forgot to fix.

We had finished perfecting the plan and we were exhausted. It had been early afternoon when we started and it was now about 6 o'clock. We took breaks, picked up Conner from the bus stop, snacking, bathroom, new pens when we ran out of ink.

"Thats should be it." Christian said looking through the numerous papers on his bed. While we were working, we had decided to move upstairs away from the distractions outside, and when Conner got home, we could watch him.

I sighed and stacked back up the papers, placing them next to me and laying down on Christians bed with a frustrated groan.

Christian joined me, lying next to me on his Queen sized bed. I stretched myself out, closing my eyes and laying one of my hands across my stomach, placing the other one in between Christian and I.

"Thank you" I said softly to Christian, my eyes still closed.

I felt Christian slide his hand into mine, intertwining our fingers. It surprised me at first, causing me to open my eyes and look at him. He just smiled and gave my hand a light squeeze. I returned the smile and felt a blush creep up on my cheeks.

We just sat there and laid next to each other, enjoying the silence and resting from the long day of reading and writing nonstop.

Just Friends. .. . . .. . . .

I woke up extra early, remembering today was Victoria Greath's first day of school. After a long day of writing and perfecting this on the plan, I feel asleep in Christian's bed and he carried me back into my room. I blushed to myself in the darkness, rerunning everything from yesterday, just as I do everytime I wake up. I got off my bed, darkness filling the room because it was that early. I smiled to myself and threw on some clothes, making sure everything was on properly because I couldn't see. I put on makeup that i hated to wear, fake glasses, and lastly my Converse. I knew it was extremely risky to go back to the same school, but I really had to finish this experiment, and to do that, I needed the same school. I snuck into Christian's room, crawling onto his bed and sitting next to him, I bent down to his ear.

"Wake up" I whispered into his ear, causing him to groan and turn onto his side. I giggled and talked to myself loudly.

"Well I guess we're gonna have to do this the hard way." I said loudly, but not loud enough to wake up Conner.

I ripped the blankets off of his body violently, revealing his shirtless chest. He had on pants, thank God. I laughed to myself as he groaned and reached around looking for some type of cover. I laughed and got off his bed, going to the other side. I picked him up bridal style, meaning he was very light for a guy. i carried him downstairs, careful not to trip and hurt him. He was half asleep, his eyes half open and looking at me.

Soft light now shone in through the windows, showing me where I could walk without tripping. I walked into the kitchen, sitting him on the counter and getting a little water in my hands, I splashed him in the face. He shrieked a little and wiped the water off his face, giving me a smirk.

"It's too early!" He said, getting down from the counter and trudging back upstairs slowly.

I laughed and ran up behind him, sleeping him off his bed and running up the stairs. He going to my neck and his eyes were wide to shop. Once I was at the top and I put him down, I already have I was already having and puffing.

"We'll I'm Awake now." He said rubbing his eyes and walking into his room.

I walked into Connors room, waking him up and helping him get ready for school. I ran into my room and grabbed my backpack and Ran back down stairs with connor's hand in mine.

"Come on Christian! We're gonna be late!" I yelled up the stairs.

"Comming!" He yelled down the stairs.

I Tapped my foot impatiently, waiting for Christian to hurry up. Finally, I heard him coming down the stairs, hair looking fabulous as usual. I smiled.

"Ready?" I asked

"Ready." Christian responded smiling.

I let out a deep breath and turned the handle to my first period class. I opened the door and walked quietly, approaching the teacher who stop talking long enough to notice that everyone's eyes were glued to me. The younger woman smiled at me and put down the clipboard she was holding.

"Hello, you must be our new student." She gave me a warm smile, she had beautiful smile to be a teacher.

"Yes ma'am, I'm Victorin Greath." I smiled back at her and glanced at the class.

First period Bing science, the tables were fixed for two people, and it seemed as though there was only one empty seat. And that he just so happen to be next the same boy who bullied me.

"Class this is Victori Greath. Please help her feel welcome at Trident." She nodded to the class, giving stern look to certain students.

"Ms. Greath." The teacher turned to me with her warm smile. " You will be seated next to Jacob." She looked over to the boy with the only empty seat next to him. "Raise your hand please Jacob."

The bully, whose name was apparently Jacob, raised his hand And smirked at me. I inwardly ground and readjusted my backpack, walking over to the desk slowly. I pulled up the empty seat and sat down quietly, placing my backpack on the floor next to my feet.

As the teacher returned to her talking. I tried my hardest to focus but I could feel Jacob glancing over at me every 10 seconds. I finally got so pissed off I turned to him and glared.

"Can I help you?" I asked, whisper-yelling.

He gave me a weird look and stared at me a little longer.

"You look familiar." He whispered back, stroking his invisible beard. " Have I ever dated you at one point?"

I scoffed "No."

He smiled and turned back to the board by the teacher was writing down scientific equations.

"Well I should." He glanced back at me and gave me a wink, before turning away.

I rolled my eyes and began thinking about why no one was really paying attention to the fact that there was a girl missing. Being me. I sighed and began tapping my fingers on the desk, hoping that time would pass me by little faster.

When the bell rang with that and a place., I grabbed my bag and ran out of the classroom, not caring that there was people in my way. I got out of the class room and took a deep breath. This is going to be a long couple of months.

"All students please gather at the cafeteria immediately. And assemblies about to take place." I heard the speaker overheard Blair.

As I made my way to the cafeteria, I heard students gossiping about it what about what it was about.

"I heard some girl killed himself." I heard one girl say

"Did you hear that one freak committed suicide." One of the boys said

"No way!" The boys friend responded

I can tell everything around me and shocked my way into the cafeteria. I looked over at the bleachers and stands them for any sight of Christian. I finally found him, sitting with a bunch of his guy friends talking quietly talking. He caught my eye and waved me over to sit where he was.

I climbed The bleachers and sat next to Christian, looking at all four of his friends.

"Hey" He smiled.

"Hi" I gave him a small smile.

He turned to his friends.

"Hey guys, this is my friend Victoria. She's new to Trident." He gestured to me, with a smile.

I waved to his friends and gave them a smile.

"Welcome to Hell Victoria." I heard one of the boys say, he gave me a smirk and a wink.

He was brunette and very toned. His skin was perfectly tan and his hair was spiked up with gel. He was really cute, I have to say, but not nearly as cute as Christian.

I giggled and pushed my glasses up to my nose, setting them correctly.

I saw the boy open his mouth to say something, but quickly got cut off my the microphone over head.

"Ladies and Gentlemen please take a seat." The principal, who was a short man, gave everyone a stern look, which immediately softened when he began to speak again.

"I may as well cut to the chase." I heard the principal say. "Penny Winchester committed suicide two days ago."

Silence pierce my ears. Not one person moved or spoke. It seemed as the world just paused.

My mouth hung open as I looked to Christian. He gave me a surprised look and turned back to the principal.

It was seconds until someone actually made a sound. And the words that were spoken truly surprised me.

"WHO IS THAT?!"

I let the words that had been said ring in my mind for what seemed forever. Every inch of me filled with those three words.

WHO IS THAT?!

I felt Christian's eyes on me, but I refused to look at him. The cafeteria kept silent after those three words were spoken. I felt a sudden surge of anger and disappointment strike my heart, compelling me to stand up.

I stood and held my fists clenched by my side. Nothing could stop me from saying what I was about to say.

"Penny Whinchester was one of a kind girl. She tried to stay out of peoples way, pleasing everyone, but herself. She loved school, but people like you-" I pointed to the Jacob, my bully, or should I say Penny's bully. "Pushed her to kill herself. She was a strong girl, head always held high, but not high enough to keep her head out of water. She was struggling, her heart breaking a little more every second. A single boy tried to save her, tried to stop her, but she was long gone! She had Nothing left!" I screamed. The entire Cafeteria had their eyes on me, including the principal.

I took a deep breath and finished what i had started.

"I should know, she was my best friend." I said quietly, but loud enough so they could heard me. "She was truly already dead. She was a hell of a warrior. But o warrior goes down without a fight, And she put up on hell of a fight. But if she had to kill herself to get out of an everlasting war. So be it!" I looked at the ground and could feel myself choking on my own words.

"And honestly, I wouldn't blame her." I looked at every single pair of eyes and walked out of the Cafeteria quietly, and as I did, I knew I had just ripped out a piece of their hearts. If they only had one really. It wasn't my fault that no one wanted to interact with me. I am who I am, I wasn't going to change just because they didn't like who I was. I ran down the hallway, tears flowing freely down my cheeks.

I shoved open the doors to the girls bathroom and being the only girl there, I shut the door and locked it. I walked over to the sink and took a deep breath, looking into the mirror at my broken reflection. The mirror, causing it to shatter all around my bloodied fists. I pulled away from the wall, not feeling pain. Numbness filled my body. Shattered glass filled my fists, but I didn't care.

I Slid down the floor, under the sink, and crawled up into a ball. I broke down, holding my legs to my chest, causing blood to smear, causing me to weep heavily. I felt like I was ready to die. I let my eyes close, still crying and fell asleep.

One that I hope would last forever.

I could feel my limp body being lifted off the ground by strong arms. I was half asleep and pain shot through my arms from my hands. I groaned and refused to move my body, due to the fact that throughout my body ached all over. I looked up to see a guy, no a paramedic carrying me out the front doors and towards flashing lights. Red, Blue, White, and Yellow lights flashing brightly. People in uniforms stood around me as I was carried towards an ambulance. I felt my limp body being laid upon a gurney, causing pain consciousness, and as I did, I stared saying Christian's name, hoping they would get the memo and send him to the hospital.

I felt myself come around, finally. I opened my aching eyes and looked around the hospital room. I looked down at my sheets covering my body and I winced when I tried to move, so I just stayed put. My hands were placed down at my sides, I stared at the IV stuck into my arm. I looked at my little nightstand next to my bed, to find my fake glasses, my folded clothes, and a single rose in a vase. I sat there and stared at it for a good minute, until a nurse came in with a clipboard.

"Oh good you're up. How are you feeling Sweetie?" The nurse asked me nicely.

I shrugged "I've been better" I said honestly.

She smiled and wrote on her clipboard. She checked my blood pressure and checked the bandaging on my hands. She took out my IV gently and placed a Band-Aid over the puncture mark.

"Did anyone come to see me?" I asked quietly.

"Yes, a boy came in and said he wanted to see you and he wanted to see how you were doing. He checks in every couple of hours." She smiled

"Wait. How long have I been in here for?" I asked quickly

"About a day or two" She wrote on her clipboard and opened the door.

"Your friend should be here soon. Then you're free to leave, stay put until then please." She smiled, and exited, closing the door after her.

I let out a deep breath and got up off the bed, not bothering to listen to the nurse. I threw my jeans, t shirt, and hoodie on, and sat back on the bed, putting my fake glasses on. 10 minutes after I finished getting dresses, did the door open and in came Christian.

"Christian!" I shouted, getting up from the bed and running into his arms.

I held onto him tightly and he returned the hug. I put my face in the crook of his neck and sighed.

"I'm such a mess." I said quietly

I heard him chuckle and put his chin on my shoulder.

"After you left, a couple of students started crying and others started verbal fights." He hugged me a little longer. " It took the staff a good 10 minutes to get everyone to calm down."

I smile to myself, but quickly frowned at the images flashing through my mind of the girls bathroom. Christian and I stood there, embracing each other. Honestly, I didn't know what I considered this boy anymore. I was sure it was a friend, maybe a best friend, but now words like crush or boyfriend flashed through my mind. I quickly pushed them away. Only friends...

We pulled away, but I held his hand in mine , not caring that it was bandaged and throbbing. We quickly left, boarding a nearby community bus and requesting Christian's neighborhood. I held his hand a little tighter as we sat down.

"I don't know if I can finish this Christian." I whispered and looked down at my feet.

I felt Christian's opposite hand under my chin and lift my face up to look at his.

"Penny. You're strong. You're not doing this alone either. I'm here and I always will be." He said, giving me a small smile.

I gave his hand a squeeze and hugged him, not letting these uncomfortable bust seat ruin in.

As the bus made it to Christian's neighborhood, we got off and began walking down his street and towards his house, still hand in hand. Clouds gathered overhead, blocking the sun and sending a boom of thunder through the clouds. I remembered what happened to Christian at a time like this, I looked over to him and he shivered, I quickly grabbed his hand and ran to his house. As we ran, I thought to myself how everything happened so quickly. It wasn't long ago that I was Penny Winchester, the invisible girl of Trident Jr. Sr. High School. I looked at him and smiled reassuring him that it would be alright. I knew I wanted Christian to look at me more than a friend. he picked me up when I had fallen, cared for me when I was lost, and most of all, He was there for me when no one wanted to be.

"Christian." I said getting his attention. He turned to me and smiled, he seemed calm, like he wasn't afraid anymore!

Not thinking, I dropped his hand and took his face in my hands, crashing our lips together. He smiled under the kiss and kissed back, wrapping his hands around my waist, pulling me closer, not caring about the storm. I let go of his face and wrapped my arms around his neck. His lips were soft and warm, melting against mine. Our bodies fit together perfectly and I loved it like this. Thunder boomed overhead, and heavy rain came down. He didn't seem to care at all anymore and the best part was neither did I, we stood there kissing in the rain. I was shocked at myself, that I had the courage to kiss this boy, but I knew that maybe, we could be more that best friends.

And they say,

It all goes down from the first kiss.

I snuggled closer to Christian on the couch, if that was even possible. After our kiss, we walked home, soaking wet and smiling like idiots. I took a shower, taking off my soaked bandages and replacing them with fresh dry new ones. It was hard to keep away from each other now. So with Connor at a friends house for the night and Christian and I home alone, I took this time to heal a little and spend time with him as well.

He held me close to his chest, with my arms wrapped around him. The T.V. was off and it was just us, enjoying the comfortable silence with each other. After today, I really needed some quiet. It was dark outside, but neither Christian, nor I moved to turn lights on. I smiled into his chest and he held onto me a little tighter. Something had been bugging me ever since we had gotten home, and I needed to get it off my chest.

"Christian?" I looked up at him, refusing to loosen my hold around him.

He looked down at me and smiled. " Yes?"

"What am I going to do about school tomorrow?" I asked quietly and stared at Christian's t-shirted chest.

"You're going to walk in with your head held high." He said as he kissed the top of my head.

I smiled and nodded to his response.

"You know, I wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for you, you know that right?" I whispered, closing my eyes and putting my face into his chest.

I felt him tighten his hold around me and pull his mouth right next to my ear.

"And I'm so glad you are." He whispered into my ear, his hot breath tickling my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

I turned my face into his, kissing him. He kissed me lightly, a genital and soft kiss. I took this moment to take in everything, his smell, his touch, his taste, and I craved every piece of it. His hands guided up my back landing on the back of my neck, putting more pressure into the kiss. I smiled and let go of my hold around him, lightly putting my hands onto his soft cheeks.

We broke apart, breathing deeply. We gazed into each others eyes, his brown eyes piercing into my brown eyes. I smiled at him and he smiled back at me, pushing a strand of my hair out of my face and tucked it behind my ear.

And that night, we fell asleep in each others arms...

Obvious to the fact that the next day would change our lives forever.

I felt my eyes open slowly, to be waken up next to Christian. As I looked up at him he was already looking down at me with one of his smiles. His arms were still wrapped around me holding me close, but my hands were curled up into his chest. I looked into his eyes and smiled, he smiled back and released me, so I could stand up and stretch. I heard him chuckle as I made my st reaching loud and long

"What?" I laughed

"Nothing." Christian said and adding a wink at the end.

I smiled and walked up stairs, changing out of my dirty clothes and into some fresh clean ones. I pulled a brush through my hair, threw my fake glasses on, and slid on my Converses, ready to take on the day.e kitchen and grabbed an a

I hopped downstairs with my backpack on my back. I went into the kitchen and grabbed an apple, snacking while I waited for Christian to finish getting ready. The nerves were rising in my stomach, getting worse and worse by the second. I took another bite out of my apple and tried to clear all the worst possible things that could happen. Getting impatient, I walked over to the stairs.

"Christian are you almost ready?" I yelled up the stairs, but silence was the response.

"Christian!" I yelled once more, still nothing in response.

I ran up the stairs and into Christian's room, to find him sleeping against his dresser with his shirt half way put on. I chuckled and the sight of him and walked over to him, standing up straight. He suddenly awoke from his nap with wide eyes. He looked over at me and smiled.

"Sorry." He said sleepily.

"It's alright, get some clothes on so we can go, otherwise will be late." I said to him and walked out the door.

I headed back downstairs and continued eating my apple. As I took another bite, I heard footsteps coming from the stairs and a half awake Christian.

I walked into the school, pulling Christian along trying to keep him awake, which seemed hopeless by now. Suddenly, a thought came to me. I turned to the half awake Christian and took his cheeks lightly into the palms of my hands, bringing his lips to mine. I kissed him slowly and deep, making sure he would completely awaken after. His eyes shot open when I parted his lips from mine. He smiled and took my hand into his.

"I'm awake now." He said with cheerful grin.

I rolled my eyes playfully and looked around at the students that were giving me side glances.

"There looking at me like I murdered someone." I whispered to Christian.

I saw a few of the students glare at me, and others barely look at me and began to cry.

"Would it make you feel better if I walked you to your first period?" Christian asked me in a hushed down tone. I nodded, gripping his hand a little tighter than I already was.

Once we made it to my first period class which was science, Christian turned to me and kissed me on the forehead and let go of my hand, pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear.

"Be good I'll see you soon alright, there's nothing to be afraid of okay." Christian said to me with a smile.

I smiled back and gave him a hug before throwing open the door to science. I walked in and rush to Missy, avoiding any eye contact with any students. I finally reach my desk as the bell rang, signaling students that they should be in class. I noticed Jacob was missing, but I decided not to bother myself with the thought. I thee my backpack down by my chair and let out a frustrated sigh, sitting down on my stool. As the teacher walked in, I noticed the amount of silence that filled the student-packed room. Being in the very back of the classroom, I looked around at the back of the heads of my fellow students. Almost every single head was hung low with depression luck. And even though I couldn't see their faces, I need that they were in pain mentally. I found out, but quickly this on myself when I heard the simple words "Please pray for his family." I snapped my head up and

stared at the teacher.

Who died?!

I got the attention of one of the closer students, the student, a younger girl, gave me an evil look.

"What" She demanded, narrowing her eyebrows at me.

I shifted in my seat uncomfortably and answered.

"What happened?" I asked quietly.

"Well of all people here you should be the one to know." She scoffed at me.

I looked around and drew my attention back at her, " Sorry I don't." I explained.

"Pathetic. You killed Jacob. Embarrassed this school. What else do you want to hear?!" Her voice cracking at the end and with that, she turned around.

I gawked at her, not believing a single word that she said. I tried to dent it, but every bone in my body told me that this was MY fault.

I had pushed a student to suicide. Just as someone did to me.

I raised my hand wearily, causing the teacher to point her attention towards me.

"Yes Ms. Greath?" she asked with a tone of sorrow.

"May I use the restroom?" I barely managed to choke out.

She nodded and returned her monotone teaching, as I rushed out of the classroom and down the hall with my backpack slung over my shoulder and tears stinging my eyes and cheeks.

I can't believe I killed him.

I ran out the back of the school and onto the vacant football field, not caring if I got caught skipping school or not. I ran to the center of the field, dropping to my knees and throwing my head up to the sky. I let out a long, hair-raising scream and dug my hands into the grass, tearing it out violently.

I can't do this anymore. I thought to myself as my voice died, leaving my throat raw and aching.

I knew I wanted to make an impact on my school, and I wanted that badly. But I didn't want it like this, I didn't want people dying because of my actions. I closed my eyes and curled into a ball, carelessly crying in my hands.

"Victoria?" I heard a small female voice. I peered through my hands and paused my weeping.

I looked up to find a younger girl standing right before me with a very worried expression on her face. I sat up quickly and wiped away my tears.

"Yes?" I asked quietly trying to act like she didn't just see me have a total mental breakdown.

She sat on the grass right next to me and put her hand on my knee, causing me to flinch.

"My name is Danielle, I'm Jacob's younger sister." She gave me a weak smile.

I felt a pang of guilt and tried my best to stay calm and not cry again. But the truth was, i was screaming on the inside.

"Jacob told me about you. He told me how to changed his life with the simple words you spoke in the cafeteria that one day. He did this for Penny. He wanted to show her that she wasn't the only one that was broken on the inside, that she wasn't alone." She looked down at her hands and continued, "Jacob was a troubled brother. He had dyslexia and ADHD very badly, so the older kids at school would make fun of him all the time. I mean it wasn't his fault he couldn't do anything about it. I always tried to cheer him up when he came home from school, but as days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, Jacob was getting weaker. He turned to Penny for an escape." She giggled nervously, "Of course that wasn't very healthy for either one of them... Well after Jacob had found out that Penny had committed suicide, when he got home, he told me about how she fought hard and long to stay alive, but could no longer take it. He told me that he did too, that he was feeling the same way as Penny did."

"Danielle, I'm so sorry i didn't-" She cut me off then

"No let me finish." I nodded as she took a deep breath in and continued her story. " After Jacob told me this, I knew what he was thinking, I knew that he was ready to give up just like her. But he told me not to worry myself, that he wasn't actually going to die, that he would always stay by my side. Well, that night, I went into Jacobs room to say goodnight and he...he was gone. His room was stripped of clothing, shoes, and other things. My parents told the school that Jacob had committed suicide, to cover up the fact that they were abusive parents." She twiddled with her thumbs as she finished.

A wave of relief washed over me, but the last words Danielle said registered in my mind.

"They were abusive?" I asked quietly, staring at my lap.

She pulled up her shirt just enough to see the huge softball size bruise that colored her stomach. I stared at it, long and hard, thinking about how badly I wanted to fix this little girls life.

"Danielle, can I ask you something?" I asked, giving her a little smile.

She nodded and put down the corner of her shirt, hiding the bruise.

"I'm 11." She whispered.

"Danielle." I said, lightly turning her head to look at me. "You're a very strong girl. A brave on at that."

She smiled and placed her hand over mine.

"After I went into Jacob's room, I found a note on his bed." She dropped her hand and pushed mine away, pulling out a note that looked identical to the one I found the day I became Victoria Greath.

It was folded neatly and had my name scribbled across the envelope cover. She handed me the note, giving me a small smile.

I smiled back and began opening the note, but Danielle stopped me.

"Don't open it until school is let out." She whispered.

I nodded to her command and smiled.

"Thank you Danielle." I whispered back, giving her a genital hug.

As we stoop up and began to walk our separate ways, a thought occurred to me.

"Wait!" I yelled across the field as she walked to the opening.

She whipped her head to look at me once more.

"How did you find me?" I yelled, throwing my backpack over my shoulders and carefully putting the note into my pocket.

"Shadows don't always hide secrets" Was all she said before she turned and ran through the opening in the fence, and disappearing.

Her words ran through my head as I walked back to class. I came upon my first period once again. I straightened out my hair and clothes, making it look like it was just a trip to the bathroom. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

Shadows Don't Always Hide Secrets.

I let out a tired breath as I walked out of my last period class, glad the day was over now. My run in with Jacob's little sister still replayed in my mind over and over again. What did she mean by Shadows don't always hide secrets? I rant to my locker and leaned against it, waiting for Christian t o come to our usual meeting place.

While I waited, I decided to open the note, that I was dying to read.

I pulled the paper out of my pocket and read it slowly and carefully.

Hello Victoria. My name is Jacob Miller, I know a lot about you, and judging by your show in the cafeteria, you already know enough of who I am. It's been a long trip for the both of us. Danielle talked to you I presume. I know you're probably wondering why I'm coming to you about this, but I know that you aren't who you say you are. Meet me at the river by your real house at 6:30 sharp. Bring the boy.

Yours Truly,

Jacob.

I found it a bit creepy that I was speaking with someone that was supposed to be dead, but at the same time that's what everyone is doing at this point. But I went with it, I knew this had to be something important. I shoved the note in my pocket and looked up just in time to see Christian walking towards me with a smile on his face. I smiled right back at him and took his hand in mine.

"How was school?" He asked, swinging our intertwined hands back and forth.

"Interesting." I chuckled nervously.

As we made our way onto the school bus, I got many stares and I knew that this wouldn't stop until the smoke was cleared and lies were revealed. Christian and I climbed the bus and sat in our usual spots. Once the bus took off I decided to tell him about first period.

"Did you hear about Jacob?" I asked quietly, looking at my lap.

Christian pulled me into a hug and I stuffed my face into his shirt, taking in a big whiff of his smell.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, putting a hand on my shoulder.

I Chuckled nervously and let go of him, looking at him straight in the eyes.

"I meet his little sister today." I said, smiling a little as the image of her replayed in my head.

"What did she say?" He asked.

I pulled out the note and handed it to him to read it.

"She told me his entire story. And gave me this note from him." I pointed to the folded piece of paper in his hands.

Christian carefully opened the note wearily and began reading it. His eyes widened towards the end as he finished reading it, handing it back to me.

"So he's not actually dead?" Christian whispered, his voice cracking a little at the end. I shook my head.

"He's still alive. And I need to see him." I said confidently looking around making sure no one overheard us talking.

Christian nodded took my hands in his.

"One way or another, we're going to fix this mess okay?" He smiled

I smiled and nodded confidently, turning back around but keeping one of Christian's hand as we rode back home.

I straightened out my shirt one last time as Christian and I stood by the river, awaiting Jacob's arrival. We sent Connor to one of his friends house just until we get this thing over with. I didn't know what this boy was capable of doing, so I figured I should keep the boy safe. I could feel the pressure on my shoulders, that even though I didn't end this boys life, I was on the verge of ending it.

I took a deep breath, as I saw a figure approaching us at exactly 6:30 p.m. The closer he got, the further I wanted to run away.

Jacob was now standing before us with a great smirk plastered on his face, that I wanted to slap off his face. Why is this boy smirking when he almost committed suicide barely 24 hours ago"

"Hello, Penny"

I flinched at my name. He knows my name. I felt Christian tense next to me, but not daring to glance over at me. I heard Jacob give a low, dark chuckle that sent shivers down my spine.

"That's right. I know your little secret." He crossed his arms over his chest and smirked.

"Why did you do this?" I snarled, completely losing fear of this boy.

"Simple reasons." He pretended to inspect his nails as he continued. "I knew that my abusive parents would be happy to get rid of me, and that the school would be devastated of my loss of life. And when they put two and two together, all fingers point to you." He pointed at me to emphasizing his point.

"What did I ever do to you!" I demanded. I was angry now. "I had reasons for doing this to you. Good reasons. You practically killed me for peats sake!" I practically screamed.

"Ah. But why did you attempt to return the favor?" he asked maliciously pointing a finger at me.

"I...I.." I searched for words, or an answer to come out, but nothing did.

"Exactly." He snickered.

"Listen. You want your secret safe correct?" He asked, not letting me answer, "Well I want to be dead and stay dead." He smirked.

"What do you want from me?" I snarled, bawling up my hands into fists.

'I want you on your knees begging for mercy." He smiled, venom dripping from his tone.

"You're pathetic." I spat at him through gritted teeth.

"Better than I want to call you." He turned to Christian looking him up and down.

"So I see your little boyfriend has chosen your side." He smirked at Christian and I could tell that pissed Christian off.

"I was always on her side you little-" I could tell Christian was getting fed up.

"Now now, no need for foul language." he smiled and turned to me.

"I'll keep in contact. But not in a way you want me to." He smiled victoriously and turned around, walking away slowly. Once he was out of earshot, I felt like wanting to run after him and ending him myself.

I turned to Christian and frowned.

"Danielle, his little sister, made him sound so much more innocent." I sighed and plopped down in the grass.

"I can't believe this. Penny you may as well back out now." Christian said quietly.

I felt anger rise with inside of me.

"You want me to back down from a fight? You want me to give up and tell everyone who I really am?! Just who are you exactly Christian? Why did you help me on the bus that day? Why are you helping me now? Answer those questions! And weather you're helping me, or not, I will never back down! I can't stand-" I was standing now, and in Christian's face. But before I could finish, Christian cut me off.

"just shut up!" Christian said before taking the sides of my face in his hands and smashing our lips together.

I was shocked at the kiss this time. This wasn't the place, or time. But when his arms went around my waist and pulled me closer, all of my anger was washed away. It was a short kiss, but sweet and subtle as well. As I pulled away, I lightly punched Christian in the chest.

"This isn't the time I'm trying to stay serious." I said breathless.

Christian smiled and took my hand in his as we walked back to his house.

"I can't believe this is happening." I whispered to myself.

I felt Christian give my hand a light squeeze.

"We're going to finish this the way we started it." He whispered to me as we waked up his yard.

Christian and I went into his house and crashed on the couch, but not before there was a knock at the door. I groaned and got up, walking to the door and opening it slowly in fear that it might be Jacob.

"VICTORIA!" Connor yelled, running into my legs and hugging them tightly. I smiled and giggled. I looked up and found an older woman smiling at me.

"Well hello, you must be Christian's older sister." She gave me a warm smile and held her hand out for me to shake.

I gladly shook it and returned the same warm smile. Even though I wasn't related to Connor or Christian at all, I went along with it. And the next thing I knew, Christian was behind me, smiling at the woman as well.

"Hello, I'm Christian's older brother, Connor. And this is Victoria." He gestured to me. I smiled at her, even though we already met.

"Christian and Victoria are dating!" Connor shouted out playfully at the older lady.

The lady gave us a strange look and withdrew her hand from Christians. My eyes went wide as I looked from Christian to the older woman.

"Ma'am I'm not related to Craigens at all." I smiled, trying to explain this to her.

She let out a relieved breath and smiled. I heard her mutter something about young love and turned back to us.

I took Connor and closer the door slowly, turning to Christian.

"Who was that?" I asked.

"Connor's friends other." He replied with a smile, picking up Connor and swinging him around playfully.

I smiled and began walking towards the couch, making one more attempt to rest my aching head. But not before I felt my arms go around my waist, pulling me off the ground and swinging me around, causing me to scream and laugh. Christian put me down and smiled, leaving me breathless from screaming and laughing. Connor giggled at me and ran up stairs to his room, laughing the whole way.

I turned to Christian and smiled. he smiled right back as he pulled me into a tight hug.

"I love you." I heard him whisper into my ear.

Those simple words sent butterflies flying through my stomach. I smiled like an idiot and whispered back. . .

"I love you too." I said hugging him tighter.

This boy will be the end of me. And I was now okay with that.

I sighed as I looked in the mirror one last time. I straightened out my favorite Halo shirt, black skinny jeans, my fake glasses, and my grey beanie that I had thrown over my head to add a little spark. I smiled at my reflection and grabbed my backpack, running down stairs. I was up before Connor and Christian as usual, so I casually threw my backpack on the couch and ran back upstairs to get Connor ready for school. I walked into Connor's room and woke him up, helping the sleepy boy into his clothes for the day. Once I was finished, I handed him his backpack and sent him downstairs for breakfast. Next was Christian's room.

I opened the door slowly to find him already dressed and ready, all he was doing now was his hair. I giggled to myself as he looked at me with half gelled hair.

"I'm almost ready I promise." He smiled and turned back to his mirror, applying more gel and finishing his hair up.

While Christian was finishing up, I went back downstairs and threw my backpack over my shoulders, ready to fight the day that was waiting for me. Christian ran downstairs, backpack hung over his shoulder and grabbed Connor from the kitchen.

"Ready?" He asked, smiling brightly to the both of us.

"Ready." Connor and I said at the same time with confidence.

"Greath ! Off the floor!" I heard my Physical Education coach yell at me.

I have been knocked in the face by the volleyball I didn't know how many times, and every time I fell on the floor, Coach would Yell at me. I stood up quickly and Dusted myself off, getting into ready position. I stared at through the net at the server, ready to take Molly on. She had a malicious look on her face and readied the ball to spike. Sarah Henderson and I knew each other well. She was Jacob's girlfriend. They have been together for a few years and apparently she was madly in love with him, she refused to break up with him when she found out he was constantly cheating on her. I kept my game face on as she spiked the ball back at my face, obviously doing it on purpose. She was too quick as I felt the rubber hitting against my face, slamming my glasses into my face and sending and me flying once again to the floor of the gym. I ground as the coach announced that it was time to get changed.

"Thank God." I muttered to myself, as I walked into the locker room. I quickly changed into my clothes and finished putting my backpack on just as the bell rang for the end of the day.

I dragged myself to my locker and slammed it open to have a note fall to the floor from the locker. It was the same looking note as the on that Danielle, Jacob sister, gave to me. I consciously picked up the note and looked around to see if anyone noticed. But everyone was ignoring me, still being pissed about Jacob's death. Bastard. I stuff to know into my locker and through my books into my locker, not waiting for Christian.

"Hello. Murderer." I heard a girly voice say behind me. I quickly spun around to find a preppy face. It was Sarah Henderson who was in front of me with a smirk plastered on her face, I mentally sighed and shifted my backpack on my back nervously.

"Can I help you?" I asked rudely, trying to get her to go away.

Apparently this pissed her off because the next thing I knew, there was a fist in my face and I was on the floor with a bloody nose. Students were now stopping and smelling up Molly, as though to thank her. And inwardly groaned and stood up weakly, grabbing my damaged fake glasses and wiping the blood from my nose.

"That was for Jacob." She smirked, dusting her hands off.

"Oh yeah? Well this is for Penny." I felt my hand ball up into a fist before I could think and sent it flying to her face as hard as I could.I rubbed my sore knuckles, as I gave her a disgusted look.

"Check yourself before you wreck yourself Molly." I said plainly and walked outside. I'll just wait for Christian outside. I thought to myself.

I leaned against the wall, still rubbing my knuckles.

"Victoria?" I heard a soft voice a few feet next to me.

I turned my head slowly to find a confused Christian looking up at me. I gave him a weak smile and walked up to him, embracing him into a hug.

"What happened?" He asked softly, as we pulled away.

"I kind punched Sarah Henderson in the eye." I said rubbing my arm and looking at the floor, not bring myself to look him in the eyes right now.

"Penny..." He whispered, tilting my chin upwards. I felt weak when he said my real name. Defenseless.

"Come on, lets go home and get you cleaned up alright." He said, holding my hand with a smile, while walking towards the bus.

This Is Hell.

"Christian give it to me!" I yelled playfully. Christian and I had been at this for the last 15 minutes. Ever since we had gotten home from a long day at school and dropping Connor off at his friends house, we had been watching T.V... But Christian and I were fighting over the remote, trying to see who would win this battle.

Christian stood on the couch, holding the remote high above his head. I was jumping for it desperately, until I grabbed his shirt and pulled him down, sending both of us falling on the floor. The remote feel to the floor a few feet away with a clatter and Christian was now hovering over me with a hand on each side of my head, propping himself up. We gazed into each others eyes, not saying at least one word. Christian began to lean in, both of us closing our eyes in the process. But just as our lips grazed each other, there was a heavy knock at the door.

I gave out a frustrated groan as Christian had to roll of me and jog to the door. I stood up and straightened my frustrated-self out before Christian could open the door. I became quickly alarmed as Christian's eyes widened at whoever was behind the door as he opened it.

"Well hello ." Christian said loudly just enough so I could hear. My body froze and my heart skipped a beat. DAD?

I heard my fathers voice come from outside the door. I quickly became just as alarmed as Christian. "Is this where Victoria Greath lives?" My father's voice asked, his tone hopeful.

"Yes, please Mr. Whinchester, come in." Christian stood back, allowing my dad to enter the house, sending his eye straight to a shocked and flustered me.

"Mrs. Greath!" My father exclaimed, rushing over to me and holding his hand out to shake mine. He obviously didn't recognize me which relieved me and slightly pissed me off at the same time.

I quickly regained my senses, pushing my fake glasses up on my face and shook my father's hand, putting on a smile at it. His face was better looking that the last time that I had seen him, which had been for weeks. He looks better. And that REALLY pissed me off.

"It's such an honor to finally meet you in person! I've heard from so many people about you standing up for my daughter." He finally let go of my hand and sat down right next to me, and completely ignoring Christian who quietly sat on a different coach as us.

"Thank you Mr. Winchester." I said with a fake smile. "She was a good friend of mine."

"I bet she was." He gave me a saddened look that I could tell was highly fake.

"How is the family taking it?" I asked, curiously while we were on the subject.

He sighed and looked at his hands. "Her little sister is a mess, and her mother, oh her mother." He shook his head.

Now this I knew was a lie. My mother is living in England at the time, living with some weird boyfriend she had met over the internet. She completely dropped my sister and I and left. She never cared about us in one way, or another. And to this day, I know she doesn't.

"Oh my, sounds like a dilemma." I said, sarcasm ringing highly in my voice.

"Oh yes Mrs. Greath." He said sadly, sighing dramatically as my father always did if he wanted something.

"Please call me Victoria." I gave him the fakest smile I've ever put on.

"Well Victoria. I'm currently cleaning out Penny's room, getting rid of everything. and since I figured you were good friends with her, that you would like to keep some of her things. You know as tokens, or memories you two shared. Would you like any of it?" He asked with hopeful eyes.

"What are you going to do with my- I mean what are you going to do with her room?" I demanded, feeling the anger rise in my chest.

"Well, my girlfriend is moving in with Penny's sister and I, and I need the room for her office." He explained nonchalantly.

"I want none of it." I snarled through my teeth. I was getting to my boiling point with this man.

Mr. Winchester as I called him, not wanting to call him my dad any more, shifted in his seat nervously and looked at his hands.

"Alright, well if you change your mind, or anything, here is my number." He handed me a card.

"I'm throwing everything out in a week, so try to contact me before that if you'r willing to change your mind about it." He said, clearing his throat.

"Get out." I snarled, standing up straight and pointing to the door.

"What?" Mr. Winchester asked, clearly taken back to my demand.

"I said,-" I cleared my throat," GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE!" I screamed at him, stomping my foot in the process.

Mr. Winchester stood quickly and jogged out the door, opening it and disappearing as fast as he could.

As soon as the door clicked closed, Christian was at my side, trying to comfort me with a hug.

"Christian. Don't touch me." I demanded, giving him a side glance. He quickly withdrew his hands and took a step back.

I was completely overwhelmed with anger. I couldn't help it anymore, so I dropped my knees and let out the loudest scream I could manage. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Christian covered his ears.

I let my voice out and collapsed, falling into Christian's arms, sobbing uncontrollably. He held me close to him, rubbing me soothingly and whispering to me calm me.

I was so sick of these feeling. These feelings that I knew would never go away. I wanted out as Victoria, more than anything I wanted out as Penny. I wanted to give in, to give up!

But there's something you should know about me.

I Don't Go Down Without A Fight.

I lied in my bed, tossing and turning. I couldn't sleep, and I refuse to let Christian sleep in my bed with me. He needed his sleep and I knew I would be up all night. After Mr. Winchester (Dad) give me an unexpected visit, I was a mental wreck. I refuse to you dinner and I didn't say a word to Connor when he got home from his friends house. I turn frustrated Lee onto my side, hearing the crunching of paper in my pocket as I wrote. My brain clouded with curiosity as I pulled the paper from my jeans that I still war from earlier today. I squinted and realized it was the note that had fallen from my locker. One that I had suspected that Jacob sent me. I turned on my lamp and sat up in my bed, sending out the crumpled note.

I quickly opened it and slid the note out, unfolding it and reading it thoroughly.

Hello Victoria. Or Penny. However you really are. I hope you enjoy my girlfriends presence while it lasted. She was a wonderful idiotic girl isn't she? I hated her. But not as much as I hated you my Sweet, sweet penny. By the time I'm done with you, you'll be on your knees begging for mercy. He may be wondering how I know so much about you. Well let's just say that the people you trust, aren't who they say they are. Until I watch you suffer next.

Yours truly,

Jacob.

I could feel my blood boil as I finished reading his name. I wanted this boy dead. I didn't care if I had to do it myself. I would be rid of this past once and for all.

I crumpled up the note violently and threw it across the room, causing it to hit the wall and fall in to my backpack. I ground and fell back onto the bed, letting my head rest on the pillows. I rolled over and turned off the light, lying there and rereading the note in my mind. I truly did hate this boy. And I didn't know what I did to make him hate me so much. Sure I humiliated him in fact entire school pretty much, but that's no case for war.

I wanted away from this was to change my school for the better, and get away from my hell of a family. But seems like I caused the exact opposite. I sat up from my pillows and stared into the darkness.

What have I done?

I shifted my backpack upon my shoulders as Christian and I walk to the bus stop in silence. Ever since I read the note Jacob wrote to me, I have been paranoid of anyone I was close to. I knew I should trust Christian, but something in that letter, racked my brain into thinking Christian was enemy.

"Penny. Please talk to me." I heard Christian whisper to me.

I whipped my head towards him, shoving my clammy hands into my heated jacket pockets.

"Hi." I said quietly.

Christian came to a complete stop and turned to me, grabbing me by the shoulders and making me look him in the eyes.

"Please tell me what's wrong." He spoke with pleading eye, his voice cracking a little towards the end,

The pace of my heart quickened from the sudden movement.

"Let me go Christian." I whispered, looking towards the ground to avoiding his eyes. He let go of me softly, letting me straighten myself out. I retrieved the note from Jacob, which I remembered to keep in my pocket. I took the note out and took his hand in mine and placing the note onto the palm of his hand.

"This is why I'm so upset." I spoke softly and plainly, shoving my hands in my jacket pockets once again and turned to continue walking down the street leaving him behind.

I'm so sick of this!

I slammed my locker closed, shoving my books into my backpack. I was now the schools worst enemy and I was now okay with it. Christian was being a little to sensitive and I could feel my mental stage beginning to slip away a little more each day.

"Hi" I heard a female voice behind me.

I turned around and smiled at the young girl that was in front of me. I knew her. Her name was Jacky Turner. She was in the same grade as me and struggled a lot in her academics. Her bright red hair was pulled back into a messy bun today, complimenting her ti dye t-shirt and jeans with blue flip flops. Jacky was a little shorter than me, but her hair made up for it a little bit.

"Hey." I smiled, throwing my backpack over my shoulder.

She shifted the textbooks in her arms and smiled at me.

" I know you're probably really busy, you know, with the whole school hating you all.." she trailed off not finishing her sentence.

"Yeah. . ." I said monotone, rubbing my forearm awkwardly.

"Well, I was wondering if maybe, I don't know..." She trailed off again, looking down at her shoes.

" Jacky. Come on." I said, egging her on.

"I waas just wondering if you could tutor me in Math?" She spend talked. Looking me straighted in the eye.

The request was odd, I'll admit. But I wasn't going to turn her down after she went through the trouble of talking to the most hated person in the school.

"Sure." I said, giving her a small smile.

Her face lit up like a little kid on Christmas morning.

"GREAT! Meet me here at 4 p.m. tomorrow after school." She smiled, handing me a piece of paper with an address on it.

"See you there." I smiled, taking the note note from her pale hands.

She nodded, skipping off and out the doors of the school. I looked around the barren halls, searching for Christian who was now always late. I gave out a loud frustrated sigh and looked down at the note. Her handwriting was terrible but it was still readable. I sighed and stuffed the note into my pocket. I looked to find Christian's friends coming down the hall. They were all laughing at a joke one of the boys made.

"Hey guys have you seen Christian?" I asked loudly, getting their attention.

"Sorry Vic. Don't have a clue." One of the boys said.

" I saw him in the locker room, he looked pretty beaten up." A blonde one said.

Anxiety came over me. I Swear If Jacob Did Something...I took off down the empty hall, making a sharp turn towards the gym area. As soon as I spotted the boys locker room door, I could feel my pace quicken. I reached for the handle, yanking it open. I didn't care if I got caught.

"Christian?" I shouted through the locker room, breathing heavily.

The locker rooms were clearly empty except for a few stray pairs of boxers here and there. I heard a faint voice not too far away.

"Penny." I heard Christian's voice.

I walked around a row of lockers to find Christian sitting on the floor, leaning up against the lockers. His eyes were surrounded with purple, the side of his face was bloody. He was holding his arm to his stomach.

"Oh Christian.: I sighed, walking over to Christian and sitting on the floor with him, inspecting his wounds.

I heard him chuckle, his voice weak and scratchy.

"What happened!?" I whispered, lightly touching his bruised eyes.

"Jacob..." He trailed off, coughing.

I could feel the anxiety and anger building up in my heart. That Little BASTARD Is Ganna Get it. I slammed my fist against the locker, causing Christian to jump and look at me with concern in his eyes.

"You're so beautiful." I heard him whisper. I flinched at his compliment.

The anger washed away soon as those words left his mouth. He called me beautiful. I smiled and looked over at him. I picked him up gently, causing him to wince a little. I placed him in my lap as i sat leaning against the lockers. He wrapped his arms around my neck and chuckled, looking straight into my eyes.

"Shouldn't this be the other way around?" He smiled, his purple eyes crinkling.

"Sometimes, we need a change of place." I smiled, trying to be a little sentimental.

His bloody teeth showed as he gave me a wide toothy grin. I mentally cringed. This boy has gone through hell just because of my stupid decision. I frowned and hugged him to my chest, kissing his hair.

He nuzzled into my chest and sighed.

"I'm so very sorry Christian." I whispered, as a single tear fell from my eye and ran across my cheek.