I've never written a story for a prompt but here it goes. I hope you like it. This if for the week 16 tmblr rizzlesfanficchallenge (milestones)
As usual I own nothing R&I except my story line.
#rizzlesfanficchallenge #week 16 #milestones #luckypenguinbuddy
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JANE DOE: Milestones
Though today was a majorly important day for me, my story actually started just about six months ago. You see I spent ten weeks in a coma a fact that I learned later. When I finally woke-up it apparently created a quite a stir. All I remember is a flurry of activity around me. It was really overwhelming at the time. The light in the room was way too bright that I couldn't keep my eyes open. Not to mention at that precise moment someone felt the need to keep lifting my eyelids and flashing a light into them. What the hell? It seemed like there were several doctors and nurses poking and prodding me all at once. I could hear voices all around me. One woman's voice in particular and she kept saying. 'Jane open your eyes. Please…open your eyes'. When I finally open my eyes and they actually focused I could see the room was full of people. A deep voice said 'welcome back'. Then two people came into view hovering over me.
I had no memory of why I was in there, I just knew I was in the hospital. I knew I had been injured very badly because the pain was tremendous. There wasn't a spot on my body that didn't hurt for some reason. It was like someone plugged me into a wall socket. Those two people that stayed in my field of vision once I was able to keep my eyes open. The gentleman with jet black hair, a thick bushy beard and wire rimmed glasses said, "I'm Dr. Cranston and I'm your doctor. I need you to relax for me."
That was when I finally heard all the sounds of the machines and alarms going off. I wanted to ask so many questions but I couldn't talk because I had a tube down my throat, "Good. That's it." The doctor said, "You have a tube that has been helping you breathe so I need you to relax and let it do its job."
The woman takes my hand and I relax, "Good." She says, "That's really good."
The doctor smiles at me and says, "It will be a few days before we can attempt to remove this intubation tube." He gave me a sympathetic look, "We have to make sure you can breathe on your own first then we'll wean you off the machine and oxygen. We'll have to ease your lungs back into doing their job due to the amount of time you have been on this machine." What the hell. Machine? What machine? How long have I been here?
He looked over at the other woman hovering above me then back to me, "I'm going to ask you some questions and if you can…blink once for no and twice for yes. Do you understand?"
Blink…blink
"Okay, good. Do you know where you are?"
Blink…blink
"Good. Do you remember why you're here?"
Blink
"Okay…well we'll get back to that. Are you in any pain?"
Blink…blink
"Bear with me for a little bit because I need you coherent for this conversation then we'll get you comfortable."
Blink…blink
Good. I'll try to make my questions quick."
Blink…blink
"You're in pain because of the injuries and trauma those injuries inflicted. You came in to the hospital with a gunshot wound to your head and several to your chest. Actually there were three bullets in your chest. That's the main reason why you required this breathing tube. Your lungs took quite a bit of trauma. Secondly was due to the bullet to the skull. We're going to need to assess what type of nerve damage those bullets caused along the way. Okay?"
Blink…blink
He again looked at the other woman again and she squeezed my hand, "There also was an extreme amount of trauma caused by the bullet hitting your skull. That trauma and the impact to the ground caused severe brain swelling. You ended up in a coma for quite some time. So because of that I need to do an assessment of you cognitive skill as well. Do you understand?"
Blink…blink
"Good. Do you know your name?"
She said it…its Jane. Blink…blink
"Is it Kim?"
Blink
"Sarah?"
Blink
"Jane?"
Blink…blink
"Good." He looks over to the woman and back at me, "Okay Jane, do you know this woman?" He gestures to the woman holding my hand.
Blink
My eyes follow the doctors as his eyes follow the woman as she quickly leaves the room. It took him a moment then he continued to ask a slew of questions. All of which I answered no to until he asked about each of my family members. The only one that was missing was my Pops.
As it turns out. I had no memory of the last five years of my life or so. I remembered my mother. My brothers Frankie and Tommy. Tommy? Wow, my injuries must have been really serious to let Tommy out of prison to visit me. I also remember my partner Vince Korsak. I know I'm a detective at the Boston Police Department and my name is Jane Rizzoli but I feel like I'm a Jane Doe. I have a great big hole missing in my life and is confusing a hell.
Dr. Cranston poked almost every part on my body asking if I could feel him touching me. Once he finished all his poking he explained to me that the reason I was unable to feel my lower extremities was due to bullet fragments and swelling. Whether this was permanent…only time would tell and as the swelling continued to go down. I thanked God as the pain medication kicked in and I went back to sleep.
It took six long frustrating days to have that stupid tube removed from my throat. Even though it had been removed I couldn't talk for another two weeks which continued my frustration because I had so many questions and they all remain unanswered. Even though I was able to write it was difficult and shaky as hell. I knew everyone could read my chicken scratch though because they answered some of the questions and gave me pain medication when I asked. Everyone's refusal to answer my questions led to several tantrums on my part. I may have been stuck in a bed but I had great aim and I could clear a table with the best of them. Everyone just kept saying how good I was doing and would celebrate what they called milestones in the progression. According to Dr. Cranston I was healing wonderfully. Though I had never felt more lost and alone in my life.
Okay, so the first milestone was that I woke up. Yeah, I'll agree with that one. It was good to be alive. Everyone kept saying what a miracle that was. The second was the removal of my breathing tube. That was a definite bonus. Then when I said my first word 'water' my mother cried. Tommy and Frankie acted Like the Red Sox actually won the World Series. Ma was a helicopter mother before but now she hardly ever leaves me alone. And crying all the time. This led to my second set of words and those were to her and her alone 'go home'. She cried again. I didn't see her for three days.
It took another week to get the feeding tube removed from my nose. Even hospital food tastes good after going so long without eating anything solid. Even bland and soft foods. I had a hallelujah moment when I moved to oatmeal and scrambled eggs.
The next big milestone according to the doctor was being moved to a state of the art rehab center. It was like being moved into a luxury suite in a prison ward. I was having difficulty speaking and when I did my voice was barely there. I couldn't move the lower half of my body so now it was time to work on those next 'milestones'. My only care was getting the tube out of my crouch so I could pee on my own and be independent enough take a shower in privacy. 'Privacy' was definitely something I had taken for granted. So much for modesty.
My frustration was only heightened when I asked scars on my hands because I couldn't remember how they got there. My entire family looked so pained when I asked about them so I knew it had to have been something really bad. Tommy finally told me that he had been out of prison for a while but wouldn't go any further. No one would say where Pops was. Dr. Cranston had told me I had been shot and I figured that it had to have been it the line of duty but no one would confirm it or say what happened to me. Then there was the woman from the first day. She only came at night now. Or should I say she only came overnight when she thought I was sleeping. I didn't know her name or who she was because no one would say but she would sit with me for hours every night before she would take my hand in hers and fall asleep. She always brought little gifts or things I might need. She was beautiful. Kind of like an angel. My own personal angel that watched over me at night. She was always dressed like she had just come from a photo shoot. I didn't know what she did for a living but she had some killer clothes. Clothes that fit her like a glove. Her honey blonde hair always perfectly done and framed her face just right. I knew she had to be someone important to me but no one would tell me who she was. Every time I asked about that mystery woman they only said that I needed to let my brain heal and let my memory return on its own. Fuck them all…I needed to know this angels name.
All I really knew was that I felt safe every time the honey blonde was around. I started looking forwards to her wordless visits. I noticed her making an appearance several times during my physical therapy sessions. She would observe from the viewing window upstairs and I also saw her talking to my mother on many occasions though she never came anywhere near me in the waking hours of my day.
I was frustrated over the gap in time I had lost but my biggest frustration was that I want to know who this mystery woman was. I couldn't say why but I wanted to talk to her. I wanted to get to know her. I felt drawn to her for some reason. She became my mission to heal and the reason I wanted to remember my life. I even lowered myself to the level of begging. Begging my mother no less.
"Ma? P-p-pleeasee…please t-tell me about t-that woo-man I m-met t-the day I woo-ke up. W-why is she s-s-such a s-s-secret-t?"
"Janie. You know what the doctor said."
"Y-es…i-it's the s-s-same t-thing everyone-e-e s-s-says. B-be patient J-jane and g-give your b-brain a ch-chance to he-alll and t-then la-later we can f-fill in the m-missing p-pieces. K-killing m-me Ma. Empty h-hole in my b-brain. Watch-ching TV I f-feel s-s-so lost."
"Janie, you are doing so well. You just need to give it time."
I whined, "F-fuck t-time MA! N-never b-been patient. P-pl-please just t-tell me. H-help me remember…pu-p-lease! Agh!"
"Janie I can't." I knew not to push any further when I saw the tears welling up in her eyes.
"S-s-sorry."
So after that day I never told anyone about seeing my mystery woman at night or the number of nights I watched her sleep next to me. And watch her I did. I felt like it was something that was special between us and in a selfish way I wanted that to be our secret. Though this went on for over a month at least that the amount of time I was aware of her visiting me but I felt it was longer. Anyway I knew she wasn't sleeping properly by staying with me like she was. I could tell by the dark circles under her eyes and her weight loose that was evident in her clothes over time even though I was only seeing her in the darken room. It was that and that alone that made me decide to reach out to her. I didn't want to make her go away but I needed to not be selfish any longer either. I needed to make sure my angel was being taken care of.
I asked Nurse Jan for a cot to be brought into the room even though she told me this mystery woman had refused it in the past. I swore the nurse to secrecy over my requests. As it turned out Jan was more than happy to do it for me and the mystery woman. Jan was a good woman and she treated me more like a friend than my caregiver. Not like the rest of the woman taking care of me.
I also had Jan start by leaving food for my mystery guest to eat. Then I started leaving little notes with the snacks thanking for her staying with me and making me feel safe.
Over the next month I was healing and making real progress but that was also when I started having nightmares and woke up screaming in the middle of the night drenched in sweat. Again everyone was happy over this new development. I didn't see it the same way. I was never so scared in my life and it made my mystery guest stop coming at night leaving me alone to fight my demons.
I started seeing a psychologist. Dr. Martha Parks and I slowly worked over these so called dreams and nightmares. As it turns out those scars on my hands were the cause of one of my biggest nightmares and I almost wished I could go back to not remembering. I say almost because I was getting back pieces of my life with each one. That made me remember that Korsak wasn't my current partner any longer. That honor belonged to a good guy named Barry Frost. Korsak and I finally had a real heart to heart over my request for a new partner. It helped me with a big chunk of healing and I get the feeling that it helped him too.
Spending time with my friends and family was like reading one of the FBI's redacted reports. I hated it. My speech was getting better except when I was upset or frustrated. That was every visit with my mother. I wasn't happy to have to see a psychologist at first so Ma and I really fought about it but as Dr. Parks helped me work through my nightmares they became almost non-existent again. This brought back the honey blondes nightly sleepovers again. That was the best reward for re-coming to terms with Hoyt.
I met two of my own personal milestones. The first was the removal of the catheter and pee bag. The second was being able to use the bathroom and shower on my own. 'Yay me…go Jane go!'
Over the next few weeks the honey blonde showed up more than in my room at night. She managed to show up in more and more of my dreams. Dr. Parks and I didn't discuss those dreams. I didn't know if they were memories or wishful thinking on my part. Whatever they were they were really good dreams and I didn't want them to stop. My independent showering made me even more thankful because those were some pretty hot dreams. Again I thanked God that I was the only one who could see how wet she made me in my dreams. Thank god for the 'Privacy' I now had while in the bathroom. Another hallelujah moment. Everyone was happier with that post morning Jane. Even me.
So back to why today was so important. I walked back to my room from physical therapy all on my own today. I was an exhausted sweaty mess in total need of a shower but proud of myself. I needed to rest a minute first before I showered and that was when I saw it. A post-it note that simply said 'Thank You'. To most people that wouldn't have meant a thing. For me it was the world. It helped me remember. I knew exactly who left that note. I would know that beautiful handwriting anywhere. It was Maura's handwriting. I had been leaving little post-it notes to my mystery woman for months but today she left that one for me. Thank you
Today I was no longer Jane Doe. Today was the first time in almost six months that I felt like Jane Rizzoli again. I was a Daughter. A Sister. A Detective. A Best friend. I was…I was… "Oh God." I pushed the call button for assistance. Pressing it repeatedly and urgently.
"Do you need something Jane?" Nurse Amy asked
Nothing
"Jane are you alright?"
My body was shaking and my voice was failing me, "I…uh…I w-want t-to s-s-see m-my w-wife." I was light headed and it was hard to breath.
"Jane?"
"Y-you her- h-heard m-me. P-pu-please."
"Let me make a few calls, Jane. I'll call Dr. Parks."
"D-damn it Am-eee! M-mauraa! Pl-please…please call h-her. I…I n-need h-her. Re-ree-member h-her. Please!"
"I'll make the call."
Amy sent one of the other aids in to sit with me. Monica was a ditz but I was glad to have someone with me so I didn't throw her out.
Dr. Parks came running into the room and immediately she had me working on the same breathing techniques she showed me when I had to deal with my nightmares.
I remember. I remember Maura. I remember my wife. Maura is my wife…my angel. I finally remember the best thing to happen in my life and I know why today was a special day. I started to sob. I don't know how long Dr. Parks and I were sitting on the end of my bed when my angel hesitantly walked into the room.
I stood on my shaky legs and held my arms open for her, "Maura"
"Jane"
"Oh baby." I don't know if she walked or leapt into my arms but it took both Maura and Dr. Parks to steady me so I didn't fall. I held my beautiful wife while we cried together. It felt so good to hold my angel in my arms.
"Thank you for coming back to me Jane. For saving me." She whispered into my chest.
"Always Maura." I whispered back.
I lifted the note for her to see. "I may…have not…remembered your name…Maura…but I knew. I didn't understand…because…my brain was…all jumbled…but my heart…it knew you. You are…my angel…Maura. You…saved me. This…this was…the last piece I needed…to…to finally find you. And I knew…when I woke up this morning…that…that today…was a special day…I…I just…didn't know why…until I saw this…your note." I squeezed her tight pulling her in closer, "H-happy Anniversary M-maur."
"Happy Anniversary Jane. Welcome home sweetheart."
I look up for the first time to see Ma, Tommy and Frankie standing just inside the room. My ma has been a crying mess since I woke up so I wasn't surprised to see her crying. But seeing my two brother's openly crying like they were really got to me and I started to sob again. Maura pulled my head into her shoulder and let me cry, "Let it out sweetie. I've got you."
After some time I feel Dr. Park's hands on my back then she and Maura help me to sit back down on the bed never loosing contact with my angel. When I calm enough to look up again I see Maura still quietly crying. I wipe her tears. Then look over to see both of my brothers comforting my mother, "Sorry about Pop, Ma." I say even though I know it has been almost two years. I needed her to know I remember. I then see Dr. Parks with tears rolling down her cheeks. I mouth 'Thank you' to her.
I look down at Maura lifting her chin for her look at me. I had things to say to Maura and for once I didn't care who heard me say them to her. I didn't care if they saw me as weak or vulnerable because this beautiful angel gave me my life back with two simple and yet meaningful words, "You gave me two words and with them you opened the door to my life again. I remembered. I remembered the day I first kissed you. Our first date. Our first…you know. The day I asked you to marry me. The day we got married. You looked absolutely gorgeous in your wedding dress and it took my breath away when I first laid my eyes on you walking down that aisle. Oh, and our honeymoon. Especially our honeymoon." I wiggled my eyebrows at her and she laughed. I heard some muffled chuckles from around the room but I didn't look away from those magnificent hazel eyes looking back at me. "And then I remembered why I'm here. The day that almost separated us forever."
"You saved me."
"Always." Was the only word I could get past the lump in my throat. Then I remember that I'm still a sweaty mess and stink, "Sorry I'm messing up your nice dress, Maur."
Maura pulls back to look at me. She realizes that I'm still in my workout clothes, "I don't care Jane. I'm too happy." She rubs my arms.
I lean in and whisper in her ear just for her to hear, "You could help me shower?"
"Jane!" she says and playfully slaps my shoulder.
"I mean…I know it's been a while but…uh that gonna have to wait. I feel dirty and I need a shower but I'm too shaky right now."
That was Dr. Park's queue, "Alright. Now that everyone has calmed and the storm is over I think I'll go. Jane, I'll stop in before I leave tonight and just make sure you're still doing okay.
Maura reaches out taking her arm stopping her, "Thank you Martha."
"Have a good afternoon everyone." She smiles and nods before leaving the room.
Now that was Ma's queue to move in and hug me, "Okay…okay Ma. I'm good."
"Oh, Janie."
"No. No more tears Ma. We're gonna move on now. I love you and everything you've done but I need some time with Maura now…Please."
"Of course sweetheart." I give her one more hug.
Then I hugged Frankie and Tommy. As they were all leaving the room Frankie popped his head back in, "Welcome back sis." And then he was gone.
Maura and I sat in each other's arms for a while longer. When I finally broke the silence, "I need a shower."
"You need to rest."
"Help me shower then rest with me?"
"Let me just call the dispatch department so they know I won't be available and know to call my back-up if need be then I'm all yours. Oh, I better text Barry and Vince too. They should really hear the news first hand."
"M'kay." I smile.
Maura was true to her word made her phone call to dispatch a quick one but we called the guys instead. I decided I wanted to tell them myself. We were on the phone with them for a bit longer than I planned but that was okay. Maura helped me shower and we fooled around for a bit, like we were two teenagers. It's our anniversary after all. Once I was dressed and Maura was changed into a pair of my pajamas. Sweats and a t-shirt. Damn she looked hot! We snuggled into my bed together and fell asleep.
I woke from a dream or should I say a memory. It took me a few minutes to relax and slow my breathing down. It was all too real remembering the day of the shooting.
"What have we got, Korsak?" I asked as I lifted the crime scene tape for Maura to walk under.
"It's a bad one." He shook his head, "I sent Frost right out to canvas for witnesses. I almost lost my lunch."
"Geez." I mumbled noticing all the blood as we walked closer to the victim. Maura walked right over to the body and I looked away for a moment to regain my composure. That was when I saw the man step out of the crowd pointing the semi-automatic handgun directly at Maura who was currently crouching over examining the dead body. I hollered, "Gun!" Just as I dived toward Maura shots rang out. It went black after that.
I woke up panting. I worked to regulate my breathing and not wake the sleeping beauty next to me. There was a light knock at the door and Nurse Jan walked into the room.
She looked over at the two of us. With a great big smile on her face she said in a whisper, "So all the rumors are true then."
I smiled at her just as Maura stirred. Smiling at my wife and giving her a chaste kiss on the lips I say, "Yes today was a really good day Jan. Because I not only remembered that I am daughter of a crazy woman and sister to two really good brothers. And that I'm a really…really good Detective by the way but I also remembered I'm a wife." I smile at the woman in my arms then back at the nurse, "Jan, I'd like to introduce you to my best friend and my wife…Maura Rizzoli-Isles." I look at the clock to see it's just after eight. Then I notice the tray on the table showing we missed dinner, "And today is our one year wedding anniversary." I give Maura a squeeze. She smiles lovingly at me.
Jan gets a bigger smile on her face if that was even possible, "Congratulations Jane and congratulations again to both of you. Happy Anniversary."
I look at my dinner tray again. I know everything on it is cold and will be like rubber if I have her warn it up, "Hey is there any way I can have you bring us something to eat?"
Her face almost splits in two, "I have just the thing but if you tell anyone and if anyone asks…I'll deny it."
Jan took the abandon dinner tray on her way out as she left the room and I looked down at my very happy looking wife in my arms. I pull her closer to me and kiss her with all the love I had for her, "I really love you Mrs. Rizzoli-Isles. I know this isn't what we had planned for our anniversary and this is definitely not our bed but I am so happy right now. Especially to wake up with you by my side again and in my arms where you belong."
"I can't wait to take you home and cuddle with you in our bed because this one is the most uncomfortable beds I've ever slept in but I wouldn't want to be anywhere else at this very moment because I'm with you and this is where you have to be. I love you Mrs. Rizzoli-Isles and I have really missed you." She pulls me in for another kiss.
There was a light knock at the door before Dr. Parks poked her head in, "I see everything seems to be going well."
"Very well." Maura says.
"The only thing you could say to make this day better is that I can go home." I say.
"Now Jane. You know I truly agree that this is your best day since you've arrived and we both know this is your biggest milestone that you've achieved so far. You also know I can't say that."
"I had to try."
"Yes you did and that is why you impress me." She smiles at the two of us in the bed together, "Well Jane. Now that I see you're are in good hands for the evening I'm going home. I will see you at our regular time. Dr. Isles I just have to say you have quite a woman here."
Maura smiles kissing my cheek, "As I told you Martha. She is one in a million."
There was another knock on the door. Jan walked in with our tray in her hands, "Oh, Dr. Parks I didn't know you were in here."
"Don't worry we're finished here." Martha looked at the tray and smiles at the three women giving Jan a wink, "I didn't see a thing." She look over at Maura and me, "Happy Anniversary ladies. Just not too much partying. And Jane, I'll see you tomorrow."
"I'll see you tomorrow." I said as the doctor left.
Jan sat the fresh tray of food on the table rolling it in front of us, "God that smells good." I say before I even know what she brought us.
"Complements from all us girl on the North wing. Since it's a night to celebrate we got you burgers and fries from the joint down the street. Best bar burgers in town and even Dr. Parks knows it."
Before Maura can object Jan said, "Though it's a celebration I still had them add salads on the side."
Maura smiles, "Thank you Jan. I couldn't have picked a better anniversary dinner to share with my wife."
I nod in agreement, "Thanks Jan. And can you thank everyone else for us?"
"Will do and I'll check in on you two a little later. Enjoy."
Jan left us to eat our first meal together in almost six months. We happily did so between kisses and light chit chat.
I know I still have a ways to go before I can officially go home but today was a true milestone in so many ways. Therapy ended early so I could finish it off with my first independent walk back to my room. The first time I was able to accomplish that walk all the way on my own and no stops in between. It was a real workout for both my legs and my lungs. Even though I was a sweaty mess when I did arrive back to my room I was proud of myself for that accomplishment. The biggest thing you could say is that when I arrived I finally found myself there. I was no longer just simply Jane Rizzoli who up until that minute felt like she was a Jane Doe floating alone in life. I was now Jane Rizzoli-Isles who found out that her angel was her wife. The woman who stuck by her side in sickness and in health. In good times and bad…some really, really bad times. And today was our one year anniversary with a future full of promises.
I know we were supposed to be in Hawaii right now laying on a beach sipping some crazy umbrella drink but instead we were cuddled together in my less than comfortable hospital bed. Yes given a choice we would have picked Hawaii over this but circumstances being what they are we were happy just being together. Holding onto each other cuddling with frequent kisses made it the best first anniversary ever. Neither of us would have had it any other way because today I came home to my Maura. And now we would work on the rest of my milestones together.
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No beta so all errors are mine. Reviews always welcome and cherished.
