Happy St. Patrick's Day! So here's the holiday one shot! Well, since it's an Irish theme, I picked Ireland from Legally Blonde! =) Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: Don't own Legally Blonde! Or Glee! I wish!
April Rhodes couldn't believe it. She was alone. Again. In an Irish pub. Listening to the freaking CELTIC MUSIC that was playing. Of all the places she imagined herself on St. Patrick's Day, this took the cake. After finishing her next drink, she wandered out of the bar and into the eating area, where there, in a corner, sat Brittany. This somewhat confused the blonde, because everyone knee the ex-Cheerio was a proud Dutch. Of course, April ignored that because she forgot that about as quickly as she remembered.
"Heyy," April greeted the blonde, taking the seat next to her.
"Oh, hi, April…" Brittany replied quietly.
"What's eatin' you?" April asked, confused by the generally happy ex-Cheerio's lack of brightness.
"Artie and Santana… I came here because I didn't think anyone would find me," the blonde said. "My feelings for them kind of confuse me…"
"Well, it's better than bein' alone all the time like me," April replied, knowing exactly what she meant.
"Alone?" Brittany asked, "I thought you and Mr. Schue were together… that's what Coach Sylvester said…"
"Uh, well I don't know who that is, but no. Will's got some other woman to keep him company…"
"Oh…"
"Look, sweetie. Don't worry about your feelings too much," the blonde said, "I'm beginning to think it would be better to go without them."
"Why?" Brittany asked, "I always thought it was better with them…"
"I wouldn't know," April replied, "I've never done it with, but I there is one thing I always do." And with that, she began to sing.
When I'm lonely and feeling dejected
I sing this, and it never fails
I pretend like I'm in Ireland
With Enya, and the whales
"Wait, why Ireland?" the ex-Cheerio asked.
"I'm a quarter Irish, sweetheart. Where do ya think my high alcohol tolerance came from?"
When my telephone gets disconnected
Or I spend every night alone
I pretend like I'm in Ireland
Where the Irish bagpipes drone
Smell the grass as a rainstorm is endin' In a bar once I met this guy Dewey If I squinted he looked like my sailor In Ireland they know how to love you Hey, you look like that poster for Ireland
People smile while I stroll past their farms
With a redheaded sailor named Brendan
And we dance without moving our arms
And he bought me like fourteen beers
And he told me that he was from Ireland
So I lived with him ten years
Through my boozy delusional fog
But he dumped me for some slut named Kayla
Took my trailer and took my dog
You embrace in the misty Irish breeze
And if your Irish boy tires of you
You're allowed to shoot him in the knees
Long blonde hair and the sweet sunny face
Oh no wait, that's the poster for Sweden
Oh screw it. I'll never see either place!
But a girl sweet as you has a future
You have hope as each new day dawns
Girls like you always get to see Ireland
Give my love to the leprechauns
With that, the song ended. As it did, Brittany looked at April as she quietly said under her breath, "But… I'm Dutch…"
APRIL EPIC FAILS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! REVIEW! HAPPY ST. PATTY'S DAY!