Back To December, an one tree hill fanfic

Disclaimer: Don't own anything

This is a Naley story, it is based off of Back To December by Taylor Swift, I hope you like it.

So the bold is what Haley sang/said, and then the italics are what has happened in the past and what Haley thought along the way. It will all explain itself and if you have any questioned please leave a review.

Should I make this into a short story?

Read and Review!

Enjoy!

"Hey everybody, how are you doing? I am here to sing the first and last songs of the night so here we go. Well here is a song that goes out to a special someone, to say I'm so sorry." Haley said standing up to the microphone.

I'm so glad you made time to see me
How's life? Tell me, how's your family?
I haven't seen them in a while

You've been good, busier than ever
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up, and I know why

February 5th 2010

"How are you doing Nate?" I asked him. I had just ran into him, literally. We are both in the cookie isle at the food store and of course I walked right into him, not paying attention like usual.

"I've been better" he said guarded, I remember tell him one that I Hate Small Talk! It's so awkward and weird, "But really busy because basketball season started up and schools been tough, I have had a lot on my mind lately."

It was February, two months after.

"Well if you ever need any help, please come talk to me, I don't want your grades to go down. But anyway hows your parents?"

"They're okay, they have actually been fighting less lately and Lucas and I are getting along better."

"That's great Nate, Luke has been telling me, I've been working at the café more, to take my mind off things. Oh crap I have to get back, I left Lucas alone at the café while I ran out for sugar because we're out. I have to go, talk to you later." I said as a cheap excuse, I really just couldn't talk to him any longer without breaking down.

Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses, and I left them there to die

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time

It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I go back to December, turn around and make it alright
I go back to December all the time

These days, I haven't been sleeping
Staying up, playing back myself leaving
When your birthday passed, and I didn't call

Febuary 12th 2010

Here is another night I lay awake tossing and turning thinking about Nathan, where I went wrong, wishing the situation was different. Then I see that its 2 am, Happy Birthday Nathan! Should I call? I guess not, that would be Awkward, right? I can't, I just can't talk to him.

Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side
And realized I loved you in the fall

August 15th 2009

Nathan and I raced down the beach and into the water. We had gone to the beach today and were having a blast; we built a sandcastle, and then played volleyball. Now Brooke, Lucas, Peyton, and Mouth we chasing us down into the ocean. After that we decided to play a game of chicken.

September 9th 2009

Nathan and I walked hand in hand into school, it was the first day. The day before we just announced our love for each other, and now most people were just finding us about our relationship to begin with. But we will stick together and make it through.

And then the cold came, the dark days
When fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love, and all I gave you was goodbye

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time

December 18th 2009

I stood in Nathan's house and said "Nathan, I need some time alone. I can't deal with all the drama right now. Its… it's just too much, too much drama. I'm not popular, I am just nerdy Haley James. I need time to think."

"Haley please don't do this, I love you, we can make it work, your all that matters to me, those girls are nothing compared to you. I don't love them, I love you. Forget about the parties and the popularity, all I need is you."

"I'm sorry Nathan goodbye." I said walking out the door leaving the flowers he gave me on his porch.

It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time

I often think about what could have gone differently maybe I could have trusted him when he said I was all that mattered, maybe I should have trusted him more, maybe I should have let the parties, the girls, and the popularity get to me.

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile
So good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night
The first time you ever saw me cry

September 29th 2009

"Hales what happened?"

"Lucas and I got into a fight, I told him Brooke was just using him then he completely freaked out saying how you were using me, then I called him a liar and stormed out. He doesn't understand that I really love you and you really love me." I said in tears, he pulled me into a hug and held me close. He rubbed my back and kissed the top of my head, at some point we moved over to the bed and he held me close to him all night.

Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right

I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understand

This is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December

And I think that, I didn't need time to think or be alone, I need Nathan! I wish I still had him, and one day I wish he will be mine again.

Then everybody started to clap and applaud me, I had tears rolling down my face as I said 'thank you' then ran off the stage and into the dressing room. I cuddled up on the couch and just cried, remembering everything from that day.

I had been getting made fun of at the past 3 parties I had been at, and the only way the would stop were if Nathan, Lucas, Brooke, or Peyton were around to stop them. Then that day when I was watching basketball practice I went to get a drink when all the cheerleaders (besides Peyton and Brooke) began to really be mean to me. I ended up running out of the gym crying. Unluckily Nathan couldn't go after me. So they planned to meet at his house later. When I walked in the door Nathan handed me a dozen roses. Saying how he loved me and he wished I wouldn't have to deal with it, and if he could he would teach them all a lesson or two.

If I could go back to that night I would change everything, it's had been exactly two months tonight. Then I heard my dressing room door open "Lucas, I'm sorry but you're not really the person I want to talk to right now." I said in full out sobs now.

"Well then I hope you want to talk to me" his voice said. I looked up, recognizing the voice. It was my ex-boyfriend looking at me. He looked upset, you could tell he had a lot on his mind.

"What… what are you doing here?" I mean my makeup is a mess from crying, and I had thrown my hair in a messy bun, I really don't want him to see me like this.

"Lucas told me you were back here, he said he needed to check on you but I said that I need to talk to you. Did you mean it?"

I knew what he was talking about "Yes every word, I wish I could go back to that night and change everything about it. I don't want freedom, I just want you. I feel so bad for leaving you like that and as soon as I walked out the door I regretted it but I figured it was too late. I'm sorry it took me this long to say it."

"But you can't just say that Haley, not after months of silence."

"I know, I know okay!" I shouted. "I realize that this was the stupidest thing I have ever done okay. I realize that you are…were the best part of me. And I'm sorry, I regret it every night! Don't you think I know that Nathan! Don't you think I know I'm not enough for you, I never was and never will be! All those girls were right when they said that you would leave me, and I realized that and I knew that when it would happen I would be too attached to you when you would finally dump me! Until after I figured out that I already was attached. Or that I have cried myself to sleep every night since!" I yelled in full out sobs until I felt four arms around me and eight eyes on me. I must not have heard the door open when Peyton, Brooke, and Lucas walked in.

Lucas was holding me and pulled me into his chest, he held me close as I let out all the tears I have been holding in, his hands around my waist. Brooke was rubbing my back telling me softly to let it all out, all my feelings and emotions, don't hold anything back. Peyton went over and slapped Nathan across the face as he just stood there and took it, I heard Brooke and Lucas let out a short laugh. Then Lucas let me go and Peyton and Brooke gave me a massive bear hug causing me to laugh as I muttered "Cant Breathe" they laughed too. Then Peyton lifted an acoustic guitar in front of me as I joked "ahh, you know me so well" then she whispered "go let it out in your music, let everything go, and let your emotions take over." I nodded then went over to the vanity and sat on the stool, facing them all.

Then Brooke told me "Hales, be who your are, that's all that matters. Be yourself, the girl we all know and love." Brooke said with a smile.

Nathan was still sitting their with his hand on his cheek, I chuckled then looked over at the other three who were giving me questioning looks. I nodded over at Nathan than at Peyton, they laughed too.

I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul

I know that you are something special
To you I'd be always faithful
I want to be what you always needed
Then I hope you'll see the heart in me

I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul

Your beautiful soul, yeah
You might need time to think it over
But im just fine moving forward
I'll ease your mind
If you give me the chance
I will never make you cry c`mon lets try

Am I crazy for wanting you
Baby do you think you could want me too
I don't wanna waste your time
Do you see things the way I do
I just wanna know if you feel it too
There is nothing left to hide

You beautiful soul, yeah.

I sang then began another song

I see your face in my mind as I drive away
Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
But people are people and sometimes we change our minds
But its killin me to see you go after all this time
Mhmmm mhmmm

Music starts playing like the end of a sad movie
It's the kind of ending you don't really wanna see
Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down
Now I don't know what to be without you around

And we know it's never simple never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand
And I can't breathe without you but I have to
Breathe, without you but I have to

Never wanted this, never wanted to see you hurt
Every little bump in the road I've tried to swerve
But people are people and sometimes it doesn't work out
Nothing we say now is gonna save us from the fall out

It's 2 am
Feelin like I just lost a friend
Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me
Its 2 am
Feelin like I just lost a friend
Hope you know this aint easy, easy for me
And we know it's never simple never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
Oh I can't breathe without you but I have to
Breathe, without you but I have to
Oh I can't breathe without you but I have to
Breathe, without you but I have to

I'm sorry.. I'm sorry.. I'm sorry

I looked up as the final tear I swore I was going to cry tonight rolled down my cheek. I saw Brooke and Peyton both crying for the pain I felt and Lucas looking at me like a five year old boy and someone stole his puppy. Then I looked at Nathan, he looked at me with regret in his eyes. Then he spoke up "Hey guys, um…could I have a few minutes with Haley, if it's okay with her?" I simply nodded as they responded "Sure"

Lucas gave me a big hug and whispered "You gonna be alright Hales?"

"Yeah I will, I will be fine Rambo!"

"Haha, Ms. Pretend S.A.T.s, and Rambo was cool, jeez I forgot about how much of a nerd you were"

"Whatever you say Lukey"

Then Brooke and Peyton gave me a joint hug, "We love you tutor girl"

"I love you guys too, Tigger, and Goldilocks! Now get going!" I said smacking their butts as they both jumped walking out of the room. Lucas gave me one longing look before walking out and shutting the door.

"I'm sorry for being so harsh, I just wanted to make you feel as bad as you made me, but now I understand that you felt the same way I did. I still love you Haley, but I can't help but think that I can't trust you because you didn't trust me… us. I loved you and only you." Nathan said walking over to me grabbing my hand and placing it on his heart. "You had something all those girls didn't, my heart. You have my heart, it belongs with you. I gave you my heart, and if that's not enough for you then I'm not enough for you."

"It is enough for me Nathan. It is! It is! I love you, I just…let my insecurities get to me. I should have believed you when you said all this to me before but I could help but doubt it. You're all I need."

"You feel that?" he questioned, my hand still on his chest and him with his illegal smirk covering his face. "My hearts racing, that's what happens when I'm around you Haley, I know a lot has gone on between us and I can't just forget about it all. But I can move on. I can't live any longer without you, I won't."

"You don't have to, you have me." I said quietly as I took a chance and leaned up to kiss him, luckily he leaned down and connected our lips. A few minutes later we pulled apart as I rested my head on his chest "I love you"

"I love you too. Always and Forever" I said lovingly, kissing his chest. "Does that mean?"

"Haley James will you be my girlfriend?" he questioned pulling away looking into my eyes.

"Yes, yes absolutely yes!"

"Good, we can talk later, I just want to enjoy this moment, and we should go back to the party."

"Okay just let me get cleaned up" I said still in a haze from what has just happened.

"You don't need to, you look beautiful."

"No I don't" I said as he replied "yes you do, you always look beautiful."

"thank you" I leaned up and kissed him then said "still" I went over to the mirror and took of all my eye makeup, applied a simple, light coat of blush, then a little lip gloss then pulled my hair out of a bun and put it in a ponytail, then straightened out my shirt. Nathan stood behind me most of the time with his hands around my waist. Then we walked hand in hand back into the main room at tric, Peyton, Lucas, and Brooke saw use. They all had giant grins on their faces, not needing to ask anything as I mouthed 'tell you later' and they subtlety nodded. Once we arrived Peyton excused herself to go help the dj. Next thing we knew she was on stage saying "this one goes out to two of my best friends, we all knew this day would come, it's about time!" we both smiled as 'More Than Anyone' By Gavin DeGraw started to play, Nathan grabbed one of my hands and led me to the dance floor. He just held me close to him as we danced together for the rest of the night until she had to sing again.

"Alright guys, I hope your night has been as amazing as mine!" I smile looking over at Nathan, he had a cheesy grin plastered across his face. "So here's to memories. Now here is the last song of the night!"

I like to say, I've made good use of my time while you've been away.
And it's true,
I've been in my piano everyday
thinking of you.

They talk around, I hear them whisper, It's the funniest thing really they think you're gone forever
I know the truth, It's just getting hard to believe it.
When they all tell me it's over
even the stars are aligned and I,

I follow the signs so clearly,
and still I've fallen
the quicksand's pulling me down.
I follow the signs so clearly,
and still they catch me
the quicksand's pulling me down.

I'm not the same, I can't sleep nights and now i'm calling your name when I do.
and yet without you, they say I get along better, better, better.
When they all tell me It's over
I'll damn the gods until the stars are aligned and I,

I follow the signs so clearly,
and still I've fallen
the quicksand's pulling me down.
I follow the signs so clearly,
and still they catch me
the quicksand's pulling me down.

Look at my life, look at my face, can't you see my heart bleeding down my sleeve,
you're holding my hand and holding my heart but I just want to feel your breath inside me so I can breath.
Somewhere in the distance I catch a spark of grace I hope it's something that makes me feel like i'm alive.

It's never to soon,
it's never to late,
so I start screaming out
I see your face
I see your hand reaching down and I yell to you and I say,

I follow the signs to clearly,
and still I've fallen
the quicksand's pulling me down.
I follow the signs so clearly,
and still they caught me
the quicksand's pulling me down.

I follow the signs so clearly,
and still I've fallen
the quicksand's pulling me down.
I know you can feel me rising,
And I'm on fire
if you keep on pulling me up.

Look at my life, and look at my face,
look where I've come to get to this place with you.
Being here to sit and lay at your feet and rest in your arms
And listen to your heart beat.

"Thank You" Haley said with a smile as she looked out onto the audience, everyone was cheering loudly, Brooke Peyton and Lucas all were cheering loudly and clapping but the loudest was by far Nathan. She ran off the stage and he met her at the side stage as she jumped into his arms.

"Was my girl awesome or what?" He exclaimed and Haley loved it my girl she loved it when her referred to her as his girl!

"Thanks Baby" Haley said leaning in to kiss him, as he twirled her around, she squealed. "I Love You"

"I love you too Hales, Always and Forever"

Everything was once again perfect.

So should I do another chapter, make a story out of it, or just leave it as a one-shot? It's up to the people! I hope you liked it!

The songs uses were: Back to December-Taylor Swift

Beautiful Soul-Jesse McCartney

Breathe-Taylor Swift

Quicksand-Everly