Ten Misunderstandings of Soul Eater Evans

A/N: Rated T because…I think there's a D-word in there somewhere…


1. He doesn't carry her books for her.

It's not that he doesn't care about how heavy they are. She made it quite clear large, lethal hard covers were a hobby of hers. And not just to read. He knows she hates when others think she's too weak to support her own weight, carrying books included. However, sometimes when the load- Maka grudgingly admits- is a bit too heavy, she will find a book or two missing from the pile in her arms on the way home, only for them to reappear on top of her overload of daily literature on her desk. She blames the evil elves because the other explanation makes her chest warm.

2. Their "bonding time" is strictly platonic.

..seemingly. He plays video games on the floor, she reads on the couch. However, the atmosphere is enough of a hint for Blaire to pretend to go to work. Just like how Soul pretends Maka's occasional touch at the back of his neck doesn't affect him when she reaches to the coffee table to grab her beverage. Just like how Maka pretends to not notice Soul leaning back to yawn so his spiky hair tickles her bare legs, even thought her heart races every time he does.

3. It is a known fact that Soul thinks Maka has no sexual appeal.

Not true at all. Soul has to admit this to himself, seeing as how he's caught her coming out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel (with little ducks stitched on the side) on several occasions when she's too eager to get back to a book. Whenever this does happen, Maka finds that whenever she does go back to the bathroom to hang her towel up, the door is locked and Soul is taking a (cold) shower. She still wonders why he does that.

4. He is one Maka Chop short of calling child services.

Which he threatens at her (and which she promptly ignores) but never will because he is a bloody masochist at heart and the world knows it. He can't help it. When she's angry her nose scrunches up and her eyes are like emeralds of fury. Sometimes he catches her glancing in her peripheral to make sure she doesn't really damage him. He's a sadistic masochist and he doesn't care. It's worth it.

5. They fight way, way too much.

Who doesn't?

6. He won't play the piano for her.

It's embarrassing and he won't do it damn it. His music isn't romantic or happy or heart-wrenching. It is daunting, creepy, sadistic, and everything Maka is not. It does not help that she tries to catch him playing every now and then (she claims he makes a weird face when he plays). He'll give her a CD if it gets her to shut up, she just can't be in the same room with him. He only plays what he feels. And he doesn't do happy.

7. He doesn't try to act cool in front of Maka.

He gave up around the first year or so. It's not like she cares, but for some reason she can get him to do very un-cool things without even trying. Like him falling off the couch and hitting his head on the coffee table leg when he realizes he'd fallen asleep next to his Meister. Or when she accidentally stumbles upon him lip syncing with much too enthusiasm for a Katy Perry song. Whenever he does try to act like Mr. Cool, she just Maka Chops him for wasting time and energy. She can be so lame sometimes.. but it's okay. Because she's Maka.

8. They don't talk much.

The point of idle chatter sort of loses its importance when she can just feel his wavelength, and he can feel hers. It's how he's already dialing the take-out place when Maka opens the oven to realize the pot pie is burnt. It's how Maka will come in to his room and help him with a math question when he's two eraser scrubs away from ripping the textbook in half. They don't talk because they don't need too.

9. He doesn't kick Blaire out.

In his defense, Maka doesn't kick her out either. She's useful for diverting Death Scythe, paying rent, and fighting evil. And for giving Maka embarrassing (to her) birthday presents. Which she actually wears sometimes. He should know.

10. He doesn't act like it but..

..he loves her. He absolutely adores her and would make a personal shrine of her if Death Scythe hadn't already beat him to it. She's his best friend, she's his perfect Meister, she's his weirdo, she's his everything. He loves when she makes his favorite dishes after he comes back from a lengthy death scythe mission. He hates it when she wakes up in the middle of the night screaming, although that's the only time he's allowed to hug her. He loves how she can't play basketball, she looks a little lost holding the ball just as Black Star is about to tackle her and he holds himself back from attacking her himself.

He hates how popular she is, how many guys are there in Death City? He loves how jealous she gets over how popular he is (she tries to hide it and fails miserably). He loves watching her train, because the fire in her eyes is enough to consume him and make him want to work even harder to becoming stronger... for her. He loves how dense she is, though it's frustrating sometimes. He loves and hates how she says his name; it makes him want to do anything for her and it annoys him how whipped he is. He loves her laugh, her courage, her smile, her Maka Chops, her nerdy clothes (don't tell her he said that), her cooking, her soul...

This is so un-cool.


+First story, yay.

+Critique please.

+Note on #6, It might have been a bit confusing at the end. When he said he plays what he feels and he doesn't play happy songs, he means Maka makes him feel happy. So it's not like he can play when she's around. It'll go against his standards, which are very cool.

+As far as imagination goes, I didn't put a lot of it in to this fic. Maybe one day... I'll edit and try cramming articulate vocabulary. Don't expect me to, and be surprised when I do.