Kendall's Moving Out pt. 1

I never understood why people would pace the floor.

It made you look ridiculous, and who could find walking up and down the same path satisfying for so long? But as I paced the floor of the living area in my apartment I began to understand.

I was nervous and a little excited. Kendall had sent me a text some hours ago saying that he was coming home late but he had something very important to talk to me about. It couldn't have been what I thought it was, but that didn't stop me from hoping.

At that moment, the only thing keeping me from jumping up and down on the couch screaming like a teenage fan-girl was that path I continued to walk.

I could hear the knob jiggling before the front door opened. I went into a small panic before, falling back onto the couch in a "casual" position. I propped up my head with my hand and pretended to watch TV.

I could hear Kendall's footsteps coming closer before they stopped all together. "Dustin," His voice was quiet and hesitant.

Worry was quickly added to my list of emotions as I looked up at him. "What's up?" I responded, sitting up into a sitting position.

"Dude, it's like three in the morning." A small smile appeared. He sat down on the couch. "Were you waiting up for me?"

I laughed, but it was the truth. "Pff. What? N-no. I was just watching TV and lost track of the time." I shrugged.

We both looked towards the TV and it was then I noticed that it wasn't on. I mentally kicked myself for not realizing it before. Before I could start spewing out excuses, I heard Kendall start laughing. Before long I was laughing too. I wasn't sure how long we were laughing and after a while I couldn't remember why we started in the first place.

After we sobered up we didn't say anything for a while. It had been so long since we had quality time like this. He would usually be too tired and go straight to bed after filming or he would be too busy on set. It was rare that it was just the two of us, just enjoying each other's company.

I didn't think anything could ruin that moment.

"Logan wants me to move in with him."

I felt like my entire world had come crashing down around me. A soft "Oh" was all I could manage.

He turned towards me, eyebrow shooting upwards. "Oh? Is that all you can say?"

"What do you want me to say, Kendall?" I shrugged. "That I'm happy for you?"

"You aren't?"

"I'm not exactly leaping for joy, dude."

He sighed. "You know, how about for once you just say what you're feeling instead of trying to make me guess and later feel all guilty when I say something wrong!" He stood up. "I feel like I have two boyfriends. I'm not a fucking psychic, Dustin. Talk to me!"

"You want me to talk, Kendall? Fine." I stood as well. "I'm not happy. I'm pissed." I began pacing again. "It's not the fact that you're pretty much replacing me with Logan, it's thought of you throwing away years of friendship for sex!"

I could see Kendall's face flush pink. "Mine and Logan's relationship is more than that...and we haven't even had sex yet." He mumbled that last part, rubbing the back of his head and still blushing. "Anyway, what does Logan have to do with us? I thought we settled that Logan would never change what we have."

"But I want it to change." I mumbled, facing away from him.

He paused. "What?"

I shook my head. "Nothing. Just..." I sighed. "Please think about this before you decide anything."

Kendall looked thoughtful as he nodded. "I will."

"I mean, really think about it, Kendall. You have to consider everything before you make a decision like this. How it could affect the show? How it could affect the band? How it could affect your relationship with Logan - what if it doesn't work out between you guys?" Was it so selfish that I wanted him to stay with me? As long as we lived together I had some sort of grip on him. I couldn't let Logan take him away.

Kendall bit his lip. "I'm gonna, uh, get some sleep." He walked past me muttering a quick "good night" before shutting the door to his room.

"I just need time to think about it." I heard Kendall tell Logan.

They were in Logan's dressing room, wanting it to be a private conversation. I stood outside listening to the whole thing. When Kendall woke up that morning, I knew Kendall would want to talk to Logan, so I decided to go with him. I couldn't help it; I had to know what was going on. As soon as I heard the words leave Kendall's mouth I did a silent rejoiceful fist pump. "It's a big step, you know?" He continued.

"No. No, I get it, Kendall." Logan said. By his tone I could tell he was disappointed. I should've felt awful for taking pleasure in that.

"Hey," Kendall spoke softly. I almost didn't catch it. "I'm not saying no. Just give me time."

I didn't hear anymore talking after that. I frowned at the prospect of them kissing. It had been almost a year and I still hated the idea of it. I was taken from my thoughts when I heard the knob turning. I quickly opened and closed the door to Kendall's dressing room to make it seem like I was walking out of it.

Kendall gave a small smile and nod as he walked away. I returned the gesture. I then turned to Logan. We had never been around each other - not just the two of us. We would usually have someone else with us so we would be distracted and never have to say two words to each other.

I also sometimes got the feeling that Logan knew how I felt about Kendall and was trying to get rid of me. That would mean he thought that if Kendall knew how I felt, then he would leave him. I let a small smirk break out on my face. It was nice to think he thought of me as a threat.

I continued to smile at him as I took the initiative to strike up conversation. "So, how's it going?"

Logan raised a brow at me, obviously shocked that I would speak to him. "It's...fine." He squinted at me for I only continued to grin at him. He crossed his arms. "Were you listening to our conversation?"

"Psh...naw dude. I don't do that." I said shaking my head. "I'm not the uh, nosy type."

"You totally were! Geez!" He dropped his arms and stepped further into the hallway. "Look, I know about your little crush on Kendall, okay?" He whispered. "I don't blame you, Kendall is...beyond words..." He let out a breathy laugh. "But I'm in love with him and he loves me too..."

I shot up my hands in surrender. "I get it dude. Chill. I'm not looking to steal Kendall from you, ok? I'm happy just being his friend." I said trying to hide the sadness in my voice as I said 'friend.'

His head tilted to the side and stared at me with disbelief. "You're lying." He said simply.

I rolled my eyes. "Look, let's just get straight to the point. You don't like me, and I sure as hell don't like you. But we can't let Kendall see us fighting and glaring at each other." I said realizing I was glaring at him. I tried to soften my expression...semi-succeeding. "So, I say we put our feelings aside, and just try to be mature about all this."

His body relaxed and he had less of a struggle softening his face. "I agree." He breathed.

I sighed, and looked down. Then I looked back up at him. "Ok. Then we're in agreement. We'll play nice, and be good. No glaring, no arguing...just semi-smiles, and non-evil expressions." I stuck out my hand. "Deal?"

"Deal." He shook my hand. "So, does this mean you're going to stop trying to talk Kendall out of moving in with me by telling him things like 'the band could be affected' and 'the show could be affected' and especially that our relationship will fail?" He released my hand and raised a brow at me.

I stared at the boy. My mouth opened and closed repeatedly not knowing what to say. I wanted to say no. I wanted to say I couldn't do it. But I knew I had to...I had to quit being the guy whose hopelessly in love with his best friend. I had to move on. And I knew that this was the first step. So, I closed my eyes and sighed. When I opened them, he was still staring at me. "Yes." I replied barely above a whisper. "I'll leave it alone. I'll stop."

He smiled. "Thanks, man." He patted my shoulder.

I forced a smile on my face, and prayed he couldn't see the sadness in my eyes. "Yeah, no problem dude."

I kept my promise to Logan. As much as I wanted to say something to Kendall, I couldn't do it. When I make promises I keep them. No matter how hard it is to do so. Over the next few weeks, Kendall was spending more time over at Logan's and less time in our apartment.

He would go over there after filming and spend the night. It happened so often that I was sure he had his own drawer over there. Once when he came over he said, "I just came over to get my mail, then I'm gonna head back over to the house."

The house?

I really should've seen it coming...maybe I would've been more prepared for it, because before I knew it Kendall was taping up his last box.

I stood watching him from the doorway of his room, hands in pockets, leaning against the door frame. "Is that it? The last of it?" I asked, my voice more steady than I thought it would be.

He stood up and sighed. "Yeah, that's it." He said taking a look around the now empty room.

I pushed myself off the door frame, hands still in my jean pockets. I took a few steps toward him, leaving plenty of room between us. "Well..." I took a slight breath. "I guess this is it." I said taking my right hand from it's pocket and holding it out towards the boy who was unknowingly tearing my heart out. "Bye dude."

Kendall looked at my out stretched hand before moving it and engulfing me in a hug all before I could even blink.

A small smile formed on my lips, and I tightened my grip on the boy. It took everything I had to let go, and not hold onto him for much longer. "I'm gonna miss having you as a roommate man." I said, not really looking at him, afraid he might see just how much I would miss him.

He smiled softly at me. "Same here."

I sighed. "Alright, well you better get going. Don't want you getting home late now would we? Logie might have a heart attack." I said, half jokingly.

"Right," He laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. He picked up the box and tucked it under his arm with a sigh. I followed him to the front door where he paused. Digging into his pocket he pulled out his key, hanging it on the key hook. He turned to me with a sad smile. "Later, man." He said softly, opening the door and walking out

I lifted my hand, giving a half wave to the figure that was no longer there. "Later." I mumbled.

End of Part One...

My heart literally broke writing that last part... -sniffle-