a/n: PLEASE READ ALL OF THIS!

this is a friendly reminder that i have a more mature or grown-up-thinking mind than most kotlc readers, since most are younger.

i am still young, and am probably actually the same age as a lot of you, but i have been forced to grow up much faster than the vast majority of you. saying that, i mean that i have become desensitized to pretty much everything.

i don't mind swearing, i don't mind smut (doing that is just natural part of life, guys), and i don't mind talking about hard topics such as suicide, sexual assault, substance abuse, etc.

as my audience, i want you to know, that going into this story, it will include lines such as "what the hell?" and "screw you". and if i make anyone kiss (i haven't decided upon whether or not i will make any characters kiss, yet) it will not be a crush-like, one second peck.

now, i'm not saying they're going to have sex or be groping each other, i'm just pointing out that i've got more maturity on my side than most kotlc readers. and that is not meant in offense, either.

nonetheless, hope you enjoy!

Sophie didn't know why the Neverseen kept her at arm's-length. After everything she'd done to try and prove herself, they still did not seem to trust her. It hurt that time, after time, after time when she tried to show that she was useful, they pushed her away.

She couldn't figure out why they did that, though. No matter how much she tried to see from their view.

Even Uncle Gethen seemed to dislike her. Sometimes he'd be almost 'proud' of her, but the happiness would deflate in her chest when, almost everytime, she'd catch him—when he'd thought she wasn't looking—eyeing her warily and occasionally glaring or rolling his eyes. His mouth was always kept in a thin line, his eyes hard and cold as ice.

Uncle Gethen had been there for her ever since she could remember, so it hurt to see that in him, whenever he looked at her. She didn't know why his expression was sometimes filled with disgust or hatred, but she did know she was glad that one of her many skills was not being an Empath. That would hurt much more to know precisely what he felt towards her.

Of course, Uncle Gethen had always been the most supportive of her, our of everyone in the Neverseen. He'd been there for her ever since she was about twelve, if her memories were correct.

She was missing a couple years worth of her memories, which was perplexing and almost chilling. She'd tried time and time again to ease through her memories and find something from before she was twelve, but it never worked.

But she had a photographic memory. So it should have worked.

Uncle Gethen tried to fill in the gaps for her and explained that her parents had died, tragically in a explosion made by a rival organization, commonly known as the Black Swan.

Sophie shuddered at the thought of the name.

The Black Swan was an evil organization against them, Gethen had said. Uncle Gethen had also explained to her that she'd been near when the explosion happened, and she'd been knocked out so hard and for so long that when she awoke, her memories failed to recall.

Something seemed off about the story, like even if she'd been knocked unconscious her memories would still somehow remain intact. She'd always guessed that maybe they had erased her memories to spare her the trauma, but then she looked back into Uncle Gethen's eyes and decided that he wasn't lying, even if something felt off.

Sophie had to believe what she had been told. It was all she knew, and if she came across something else—something they'd tried to hide—she knew her life would crumble.

Sophie jumped in her chair when Fintan entered her room abruptly, snagged from her thoughts. Her heart rammed against her ribcage and she swallowed, trying not to make direct eye contact and focus on thinking about the details of her room.

It was small, but she liked to consider it cozy, to promote happier thoughts. She had a wicker chair and a small cot, but that was about all she could fit and all she owned. The Neverseen hideouts were tiny. But Sophie still fought off a smile as she remembered Ella, her bright blue elephant, lying on her bed.

"What is it?" she asked, trying to stay cheery. Sophie had learned that she had to act eager and willing to do what they wanted if they were going to trust her. It wasn't a fun life-style, basically living a lie, but it was much better than acting out and getting punished for it.

Fintan cringed. "Wipe that stupid grin off your face, before I burn it off."

Sophie's face fell immediately and she straightened her posture, trying not to look as small and scared as she felt, standing there in the silence. Her heart did a thankful leap when Gethen appeared beside Fintan.

"Leave my niece alone," he said and Sophie couldn't tell if it was meant jokingly or in all seriousness. She brushed it off when he looked towards her, reluctance shining in his eyes as he cleared his throat and announced, "We have a mission for you."

Sophie perked up, electricity running through her veins. She never heard those words.

She was barely allowed to do anything around the Neverseen bases. A few chores here and there, but she was often even forbidden from getting food in her own, much less having a full mission dedicated to her.

"You're letting me go on a mission?" she repeated to ensure she had heard correctly. Maybe her brain was playing tricks on her. She did tend to have hallucinations whenever she'd a) been drugged recently, or b) hadn't ate in awhile.

"Well. . . Kind of," Gethen started, choosing his words wisely. "Come to the main room, so we can—"

Sophie jumped up. "Yes!" she celebrated with a small squeal. She cleared her throat when Fintan and Gethen stared at her with this dumbfounded expression like she was extremely stupid for celebrating her small victory. She folded her hands behind her back and stood up straight, buying her tongue once to remind herself to keep her happy emotions at bay. Concealed.

"Of course," she answered, voice tight, but heart squeezing with happiness.

a/n: hey, so, it's short and i'm sorry. i'm using my old chapters as an outline for revising and rewriting, and since the original chapter of my first published "double agent" was short, this one happened to be short, too.

still, i hope you enjoyed it!