First off I have to say that this piece completely grosses me out and I can't believe I got the urge to write it. I'm probably never gonna be able to read it again when I've posted it, but it came out and I just had to post it. So tell me what you think…
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How had this happened again? Alex didn't quite know, but it sure as hell had happened. The brown haired boy lying next to her was evidence enough. Tomorrow she would be gone and this was what she had decided to do her last night. Go fuck a boy. And not just any boy, but the great Ryan Atwood himself. She knew she didn't feel anything towards him and he was the same with her. Still, she had found a strange comfort in his hard kisses and forceful pushes as he pumped in and out of her. Was that what Marissa would feel when she and Ryan decided to do it? She winced at the thought and the guilt washed over her as she realized the only reason she had chosen him tonight was to see if she would be better than him and to try to understand what Marissa found so attractive about it, about him. Of course, the large amount of alcohol she had downed was helping on the choosing part too, but she didn't care.
They had met in a bar late that night when Marissa and Alex broke up, after the bonfire had ended. She didn't know why he was there, but didn't care to ask either. It became obvious enough as he came over to her and joined her on the heavy drinking she was doing. Clearly he felt the same need to drown some kind of pain or sorrow he had just like she did. They had talked about everything, including Marissa and their experiences with her and when the bar threw them out they had stumbled out of the club. Suddenly loosing her balance as they walked, Alex had fallen into Ryan who barely caught her in time. Before any of them could help it, they had kisses. It wasn't slow or emotional, just a raw kiss only fuelled by their desperation and anger. Anger towards each other, Marissa and everyone else that couldn't mind their own business and always hurt them because they weren't 'Newport people,' they were outsiders. When they had to pull away for air, they had quickly agreed to find the nearest hotel or motel. They both knew what was gonna happen, but didn't care. Again, the alcohol had made sure of that, but did it really matter? They were just two people who wanted to let out some steam and who understood each other better than they wanted to admit.
When they got to the motel and got a room, the talking completely ended. They didn't need or want to talk to each other, that wasn't what this night was for. Stumbling into their room they quickly got down to business, kissing each other desperately and throwing clothes off in a hurry. They didn't bother making time for any foreplay. After all this wasn't anything involving special feelings towards each other and they weren't here to admire or caress the other's body. Moving into the bedroom, both naked by then, Alex pushed Ryan down on the bed and climbed on top of him, wasting no time whatsoever as she quickly lowered herself onto him, moaning as he soon filled her. She could hear his own groan of pleasure at the same time as he grabbed her ass and squeezed it before starting to mover her up and down. She willingly obliged and they were soon moving frantically, both groaning loudly in a scary way of satisfaction. The blonde's muscles tightened around him and she knew, could feel, that he was coming inside her. She didn't care because they already knew the other didn't have any diseases and she would just take a pill the day after.
Alex was slightly caught by surprise when he pushed her over so he was on top and when he kept going. She would have thought he would need a break to recover or something, but apparently he was just as turned on by this as she was because he kept pounding in and out of her, his hips forcefully pressing against her every time he moved inside her and soon enough she felt herself coming. In the midst of her orgasm she felt him come inside her again and she knew if it wasn't for the alcohol making her so intoxicated she would have found it appalling.
They both lay beside each other, breathing heavily and trying to recover. After a while Alex rolled on top of him for round two and they did it all again. And again. And again.
And here she was, lying in a bed in a motel with Ryan Atwood, her enemy, having fucked each other for hours. She didn't feel ashamed or guilty. Why would she? She wasn't committed to anyone anymore because Marissa didn't want her, and she was moving away from here in nothing less than ten hours. She had just wanted some fun before she left. That's what she kept telling herself, knowing that if she really let all of this sink in she would probably die a hundred times over because of what she had just done, had let happen.
Looking over at the worn out boy next to her, she sighed quietly before getting out of bed and starting to walk around the other rooms for her clothes. If they were both here when Ryan woke up it would just be awkward and she didn't want that. She wanted to go home, take a long, cleansing shower and sleep for a few hours before starting to pack everything.
So without waking him or leaving him as much as a note, she left, knowing this would all be a part of her past. A past where she didn't belong and would move on from not matter how much time and effort it took. She would manage somehow and she would continue pretending this never happened because if it didn't, she couldn't feel guilty about it.