Part One
"Rae – I'm fine, I'm not coming!"
"Everyone in here, are hanging onto their lives by their fingertips Rae!"
"I don't mind that you've got stuff"
"In a way, I am facing my fears – I am doing the thing I'm most afraid of."
"My uncle's got this scaffolding company in Leeds" ... "I've got no other reason to stay... have I?"
"I knew it, fleshy – God, I've always wanted a piece of a larger lady..."
Rae ran through the street, tears streaming down her face as she thought about what she had just endured. She could feel his grubby hands all over her, where he had groped her in the places, that only a couple of months ago Finn had caressed. She ran over to the park. It was in this park, near the pub, where she felt the safest. It reminded her of summer, when she felt fearless. Raves. Girly chats. Camping. Hanging out.
Finn.
Even though it was now only November, it felt like a lifetime ago. She sat on the swing and could feel her make up running down her face. She had tried so hard this evening to look pretty, to look acceptable – to look worthy. After all, Chloe had forgiven her after the incident last month with Amy and Liam, Rae should try hard to please Chloe's new friends.
"Why are you dressed like Chloe?"
"I'm not dressed like Chloe."
Her hand unconsciously flew up to feel her breast, where she wished it was still Finn who had last touched her there. How could it be, that Saul and Finn had both done the same thing, but they both did it in different ways, and with different meanings. How could she have let Saul so close to her, when deep down she knew he was trouble, but yet she froze whenever Finn kissed her neck. Then, Finn had got a girlfriend, but when he came to tell Rae that he had broken up with Emily, and nearly begged Rae to give him a reason to stay – had Rae turned him away and gone to see Saul? Was her heart into things that she knew would destroy her? Maybe then, it would be easier to tell herself told you so, then if she let herself get hurt by someone she actually cared about – someone she actually loved.
Finn.
She let herself be pushed up, feeling weightless as her feet carried herself out of the park and began a sprint down the route that she knew only too well now. As she reached the door, her arm reached out and knocked, and then she waited for what seemed like eternity.
"To. Be. Continued."
"Don't say it if you don't mean it... I don't believe ya" "I don't care if you don't believe me!"
"You don't tell me, who I can and can't fancy alright! That is mine! That belongs to me! No-one else, no-one, not even you!"
"I like talking to ya, and I don't like talking to anybody."
The door opened slowly, she realised that it was 2am, and didn't care that he was standing in his boxers, with his hair ruffled into was clearly bed hair. All that she knew, was that it was him.
Finn.