Falling
Athena02
Simmons was falling, hurtling through the air as the ocean rushed to meet her.
As a scientist, she couldn't help but note how her animal instincts rose to the surface, hands instinctively grasping for something to grab on to as she plummeted through nothingness. A part of her mind fought against the inevitable, against the logical decision she knew was best. She had to jump. The virus coursing through her body would kill her as sure as gravity would now, but this way the team was safe. Coulson, May, Ward, Fitz, and Skye would live.
Skye…
She closed her eyes and gasped as the ocean impacted and everything went black.
Simmons awoke with a start, her heart hammering in her chest and her hands twisted in the sheets, cold with sweat. A few frantic seconds passed before she got her bearings.
Not again…
The sound of her heart pounding faded until it was lost in the familiar muted roar of the modified C-17's engines. She was fine. Safe. On the Bus, with the team, and no trace of the virus in her system. It has been weeks since they'd investigated the Chitauri helmet. She'd run her own labs several times, even calling in a few favors to a friend at The Hub who'd run even more tests and said they were well within normal parameters. Weeks full of sleepless nights, weeks of the same dream.
Bloody hell.
Clearly sleep was not going to happen tonight. She may as well head to the lab. She had left the DNA sequencer working on some of the virus DNA that looked particularly promising. Some aspects of the virus' replication speed could be particularly useful if she could repurpose it for use in gene therapy…
Simmons rose quickly, tossing on jeans and a sweater and slipping back into her shoes before exiting her tiny cabin. Passing by the others' rooms, she made her way to the main stairwell in the lounge area, trying to ignore the lingering feeling of unease in the pit of her stomach.
She'd pushed the dreams aside for weeks, immersing herself in her work. It kept her from thinking about the full ramifications of what had almost—
"Oh hey, Simmons. I didn't think anyone else would be up."
Simmons started, looking up quickly with a strangled yelp of surprise. Skye was peering at her from the couch in the lounge area, brown eyes dark in the low light of a single floor lamp. Her brow furrowed with apologetic concern.
"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."
"No no no," Simmons stammered, her heart still racing from the jolt of adrenaline, "just a bit startled is all but I'm fine really. Just fine."
Just fine.
"Ah, okay," Skye replied, leaning back but keeping a slightly quizzical look on her face.
Simmons attempted a small smile, taking the few steps to stand in front of the couch and looking down at Skye. The hacker was leaning against the armrest of the couch, dressed in a well-worn t-shirt and track pants with—of all things—a book resting in her lap.
"A Concise History of Super-, Hyper- and Ultra-Human Abilities," Simmons asked, lifting an eyebrow. "I didn't know you were a fan of Professor Shipwell's work."
Skye groaned, holding up her wrist so that the electronic jamming tracker bracelet glinted. "Yeah well, thanks to S.H.I.E.L.D I can't even get near a Kindle, much less my laptop. And unless you're into technical manuals, the selection of reading material on this plane sucks. I'm sure it was pretty low on Coulson's wish list for the plane, after the holotables, bar, and parking spot for Lola." She rolled her eyes, and Simmons couldn't help but smile genuinely.
"I have to say, even I find her books rather dull, and they were required reading at the Academy. Besides, that book requires serious revision after New York," she mused. It seemed as if several textbooks were rendered obsolete that day. Several fields of study, really.
"Beggars can't be choosers I suppose," Skye sighed. "I still haven't gotten used to the feeling of always being in motion," she waved her hand aimlessly at the plane around her. "And then there's all of this mystery with my past and S.H.I.E.L.D and Centipede and my brain feels like it's moving as fast as this plane is. Makes it tough to sleep when I think about all of it."
Simmons nodded sympathetically. "I can understand how that would take some time to get used to."
"Yeah, I mean, you guys all came up through the system, but I'm still just trying to understand the basics." She shrugged, looking down at the book in her lap and then back to Simmons. "What about you? Can't sleep either?"
"Oh I just wanted to pop down into the lab for a bit to check on some things. The DNA sequencer is almost done working on some samples of the Chitauri virus I've been studying. I think, with a little targeted bioengineering, I can modify it enough to harness the—"
"Wait, what?!" Skye interrupted, looking at Simmons in shock. "Simmons, that virus killed three people. It almost killed you, and now you're down there messing with it?!"
Simmons' smile, her enthusiasm at the thrill of a possible breakthrough, evaporated under Skye's accusation. "No, it's not at all like that. I've been following the strictest biohazard handling techniques and only working with isolated samples. Plus, now that we've engineered the anti-serum, on the very slight chance something goes wrong, we'll be able to—"
"What, jump off the ramp again?" Skye admonished, eyes flashing in anger.
Simmons froze, staring at Skye. The memory of the wind, howling in her ears, the sensation of falling, and the emotion of accepting her own death came crashing back down on her like an avalanche. Silence hung between them for several long seconds. Skye, her face a hard mask of fury, stared critically at Simmons, her eyes searching the biotech's face, watching as the other woman wrestled internally with her roiling emotions.
The urge to flee rose in Simmons like a wave, and as it crested over her she spun on her heel, putting her back to Skye and taking a step in the direction of the stairwell.
"Excuse me—"
There was a thud behind her as a book hit the floor, and strong, warm fingers gently closed around her wrist, stopping her.
"Jemma, wait."
In a single moment, at the sound of her name, everything collapsed inside her. All of the walls she had built to hide away her fear crumbled. Her fear at being a weakness on the team, her fear of coming so close to dying, of being unable to say goodbye, of so much left unsaid and undone. She wore the pain of it all clearly, and she knew it. Taking a deep breath, her eyes shining with tears, she turned to face Skye.
For once, Skye was speechless. She wasn't sure where the urge came from, but she pulled the other woman into an embrace, wrapping her arms around Jemma's quaking shoulders, her sobs muted against the curve of Skye's shoulder. For long moments Skye simply held her, a calm anchor in the storm of raw sorrow coursing through Jemma.
"God, Jemma, I'm sorry. You don't deserve that. I know that you only wanted to save the team. It was an incredibly brave thing to do."
Jemma took a calming breath, shifting slightly so that her forehead rested against Skye's shoulder, her eyes squeezed shut as she attempted to find her equilibrium. "Everyone keeps calling me brave, but I certainly don't feel that way," she said, her voice muffled against Skye's shirt.
Skye's reaction was visceral. Her hands gripped Jemma's shoulders and she drew the other woman slightly away from her, her gaze holding the other woman's with earnest intensity. "You are brave, Jemma. You had an impossible choice to make, and you saw a chance to save us, and you took it. But you mean too much to this team to keep trying to sacrifice yourself and take these risks. It's bad enough that some nights I hear you wake up screaming and don't know how to tell you it's okay now. You're too important to the team and important to me, and if you'd died, I don't know what I—" Skye trailed off as the last of the words came tumbling out, her eyes—still searching Jemma's- finishing the sentence for her.
In that split second, Jemma became acutely aware that Skye had drawn her closer to her, while her own hands had instinctively come to rest on Skye's hips. The few inches of space between them fairly crackled with energy, and Jemma was unable to escape the thought that if she just leaned forward, her lips could claim Skye's.
A hundred thoughts raced through Jemma's mind in an instant. Skye was a teammate and a friend, and these feelings could jeopardize that. Despite the current impression she got from Skye's behavior now, she'd seen the way Skye looked at Ward and had awkwardly watched her walk out of Miles' bedroom; it was highly doubtful her feelings would ever be returned. It had been seemingly ages since her fleeting relationships at the Academy. Pursuing two doctorates, competitive lab postings, and then proving herself for this assignment had left her little time to meet other women. It just hadn't seemed important, then. She'd been discreet back then, and she knew that most on the team had no idea about her personal life and probably wouldn't much care, as long as she remained fully focused on the mission and her job.
But Jemma realized she had too much to lose to surrender to her heart's longing that Skye shared her feelings. Her brain knew it was the logical and safest decision, but she also felt the pang of loss deep in her chest. Her hands dropped from Skye's hips and she stepped back, out from her hands. For a brief second, Jemma saw regret and confusion flash though Skye's eyes.
"Don't worry, I think I'm quite done with jumping out of planes," she remarked, looking at her feet, attempting to mask her feelings and defuse the tension between them. She paused before meeting Skye's eyes again. She had to end this, had to push the feelings away. But she didn't want to just walk away like this.
"I suppose there's no harm in waiting until the morning when Fitz can assist me. If Agent Coulson is amendable, I'll see if we can't deliver the samples to The Hub. I should be able to contribute to their lab's work remotely. It will be slightly inconvenient, but I'll try to be brave." The corners of Jemma's mouth turned slightly upwards in a wry grin.
Skye laughed. "I think that sounds good." Jemma caught herself staring again as Skye smiled, bending down to retrieve her book from where it had fallen on the floor and set it on the table in front of the couch. "Well I suppose since you're not going down to the lab, are you headed back to bed? Might as well try to sleep." Skye stood from the couch. "I'll walk back with you."
Together, they made their way back to the sleeping cabins. Jemma stopped in front of hers, her hand on the door latch, when she turned back to face the other woman.
"Skye I….well, thank you."
The hacker smiled softly, standing in front of her own cabin across the hallway. "It's okay, Jemma. Next time you can't sleep, just come find me. I want to make sure you'll be okay."
This time, Jemma's smile was genuine before she stepped into her cabin. "Oh, I know that I'll be all right from now on."
"Good to hear," Skye said, smiling to herself as she closed the door behind her.
For the first night in weeks, Jemma didn't dream about falling through the sky.
But she did dream about falling for Skye.
A/N: Unapologetic Skimmons scene that came to me after watching Marvel's "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D"'s 1x13 "T.R.A.C.K.S". Hurt/comfort and UST because reasons; hopefully I didn't veer to fluff too badly. Other story ideas branched from this one, and I'm hoping to develop and explore this relationship further, which is why I limited this story to just the initial realizations of a possible relationship to Skye and Simmons. Oh come on, you know we writers aren't all about instant gratification, right?
Much love to the Skimmons Tumblr fandom who encouraged me to write this, and for making me not feel alone in my OTP. I'd love to hear what you guys thought.
