Disclaimer: All characters belong to HiT Entertainment.
Through Sam's Eyes
Wally Wizzo
Series 11 Episode 4
It was a beautiful, hot summer's day, about two weeks since everyone had gone monster crazy. Luckily everyone had lost interest in trying to find the Pontypandyness monster for now. I wasn't too sure what the next craze would be, but I had a feeling that I'd find out soon.
I sighed as I leaned over the railing at the base of the Mountain Rescue Centre. I'd just arrived there after walking from my house. Because Tom was heading off to Cardiff for the day, Station Officer Steele had decided that we'd be better off basing our operations from a more central location. Since it was such a nice day, I'd decided to walk to the Mountain Rescue Centre instead of driving there like the others had. Jupiter, Venus and Hydrus were parked out the front. Station Officer Steele, Elvis and Penny had driven them there. Ellie was on compassionate leave while she sorted out her personal issues, and Arnold had the day off, so it was up to the four of us to manage things. We weren't concerned though, since we'd always worked so well together in the past.
"Ah! There you are, Sam," Station Officer Steele said as he emerged from the building. "Did you enjoy your walk?"
"Of course. It's a shame you missed it, sir. You could do with some exercise."
Station Officer Steele glowered. "Watch it. You're not as young as you used to be either."
"I'll always be younger than you, and that's the most important thing," I teased. The walk in the sunshine had helped to clear my head, so now I was feeling rather mischievous. I hurried inside before Station Officer Steele could think of a decent comeback.
Upstairs, Elvis and Tom were seated at the table. Tom had his laptop open in front of himself.
"Can you pass me the CD, please?" he asked Elvis. Elvis handed it over.
"Hello, everyone," I greeted them. "Doing a spot of computer maintenance?"
"It's a new operating system for the Mountain Rescue Centre," Tom explained eagerly, "with all sorts of bonza features, like a fire alarm in digital surround sound!"
Elvis and I looked at each other uncertainly. Elvis shrugged.
"Great, Tom!" I said. "Glad there's someone here who really understands technology." Okay, so I wasn't technologically ignorant, but there were some things that I knew I was a little bit behind on. Still, I knew more about technology than Station Officer Steele did
"Yeah," Elvis agreed. "This morning, I tried to make some toast in the photocopier."
I looked at Tom. Yes, and I definitely know more about technology than Elvis does too.
"Right," Tom said, standing up. "Better get going." He patted me on my right-hand shoulder as he walked past. "Off to my niece's birthday party." He paused and spun around. "Oh! Mustn't forget the party game software." And he picked up the second CD that had been on the table.
"Ooh!" Elvis complained after Tom had gone. "I wish I was invited to the party." He walked over to the photocopier. "I love birthday parties!" He placed a hand down on the photocopier's buttons, starting it. It spat out a couple of pictures of bread. Elvis picked one up. "Oh! I like toast too!"
I had to laugh. "Elvis! You can't cook toast in the photocopier!" I lifted the lid and I removed the bread. Then, I tossed it in the rubbish bin. "There's a toaster in the kitchen downstairs. But please, try not to set it on fire again."
Cringing, Elvis headed downstairs. I went over to Tom's computer. I frowned when I saw that it was still loading. Why do these things always take forever? I thought technology was supposed to make our lives easier…
The software had just finished installing by the time Elvis arrived back. I followed the prompts to ensure that it finalised everything correctly.
"Upload complete," I muttered to myself. I used the mousepad to click 'confirm upload' on the screen. The computer returned to its normal desktop screen, so I assumed that the installation had worked. "Excellent! Now to test the new fire alarm."
Elvis followed me over to the Map-Screen 700 control panel. I pressed the red button to activate the alarm. But, instead of an alarm, loud music started playing over the loudspeakers.
"Argh!" I yelped in surprise.
Station Officer Steele came running upstairs covering his ears, followed closely by Penny.
"Oh! What is that infernal racket?" Station Officer Steele demanded to know.
I went back over to Tom's computer. "Oh, dear! It looks like Tom uploaded the wrong CD!" I flicked the CD cover closed so I could read the label. "This isn't the new Mountain Rescue Centre operating system." I read the handwritten label more carefully. "It's Dance, Dance Partython." That was the CD Tom was supposed to take to Cardiff for his niece's birthday party.
"Oh, goody!" Elvis exclaimed happily. "Let's boogie!" And he started dancing as the music continued.
A new sound came over the loudspeakers. It was a weirdly distorted alert tone. Turning, I hurried over to the control panel and I pressed the button to hear the emergency.
"A spooky ghosty has pulled Norman Price out of the train window!" The Map-Screen 700 said in a groovy voice. "He's now stuck up a tree in the mountains!"
Okay, now I've heard everything! I stood still for a moment trying to process everything.
Penny finally sighed. "Oh, well, it is Pontypandy," she said, putting my confused thoughts into words.
I followed Penny downstairs. We'd just started putting on our firefighting uniforms when Elvis stumbled down the steps.
"Glad to see you could find the time to join us, Elvis," I teased. He hastily put on his uniform too.
As soon as we were ready, the three of us ran outside and we climbed into Jupiter. I drove Jupiter down the road, sirens blaring and lights flashing. It was actually a bit of a drive to the railway station from the Mountain Rescue Centre, and then I'd had to drive Jupiter off-road in order to get to the tree that Norman was stuck in.
When we finally reached the railway station, Penny jumped down to open the gate. I drove Jupiter through it, pausing just long enough for Penny to scramble back into the cab. Once she was onboard, I continued driving up the hillside to where I could see Norman dangling in the tree by his legs.
What on earth have you tangled yourself up in now, Norman? I wondered as I parked Jupiter underneath the tree.
Penny, Elvis and I jumped down from the cab. I climbed onto Jupiter's platform and Penny controlled the levers to slowly raise it into position.
"Ow! Ow! Owowow!" Norman wailed.
I removed a pair of wire cutters from the pouch on my belt. "Just keep calm, Norman," I told him. "Nearly there…" Once the platform was in position, I carefully cut the kite string that was holding Norman up in the tree. "Got you," I said as I lifted the silly boy into my arms. I put the wire cutters away before I turned Norman the right way up.
Penny activated the levers to bring us back down.
"Only you could turn kite flying into an extreme sport," I said sternly to Norman on our way down.
Norman scoffed. "I wasn't kite flying. I was making a spectacular and very magical movie."
Now I know what the latest craze is. Wizards. "Well, be careful. There's nothing magical about danger." Glancing up, I saw Norman's 'ghost' still hanging in the tree. It was a white balloon with Dilys' dressing gown hanging from it. "Or your mum's dressing gown," I added with a touch of amusement. I wonder if Dilys knows about that? I don't think she'd be too impressed if she knew that her dressing gown is now adorning a tree.
Once we had Norman safely back down on the ground, Penny checked him over for any injuries. He was fine, so I helped him get back onto the train. Sara, James and Mandy were still inside the train. Mandy had her phone out, so I assumed she'd been filming the entire rescue.
"I hope you kids stay out of trouble for the rest of the day," I said as I started to close the carriage door.
"We will, Uncle Sam," Sarah promised.
Famous last words.
…
When we returned to the Mountain Rescue Centre, I was amazed to find that the music was still playing over the loudspeakers. Station Officer Steele had covered his ears with two pillows to try and reduce the noise.
"Sam! Turn that racket off this instant!" Station Officer Steele ordered me.
Sighing, I sat down at Tom's computer and I started fiddling with the program's settings. Elvis resumed dancing. Clearly, he wasn't interested in trying to help us out of the dilemma.
"Hey, guys!" the Map-screen 700 said. "Are we all ready to conga?"
"No, I am not!" Station Officer Steele snapped. He turned to see how I was going.
Tom computer made a low pitch beep, telling me that it couldn't carry out the command I'd told it to do. "Hmm… I'm not having any luck turning it off." I glanced at my watch. "And Tom's not due back with the proper CD for hours."
Station Officer Steele turned back to the Map-screen 700. "Listen to me you over-priced, over-sized bucket of junk! Switch off now, and that's an order!"
"I'm sorry, Norris. I'm afraid I can't do that."
I had to bite my tongue to stop myself from bursting out laughing. Station Officer Steele threw down his pillows.
"Then I'll show you…"
I spun around in time to see him reach for the control panel. "No, sir! I don't think that's a…"
Ignoring me, Station Officer Steele pressed a button.
"Switching to pool-party mood," the Map-screen 700 announced.
At that moment, the overhead sprinklers turned themselves on. I quickly moved Tom's laptop a safe distance away from the spray.
"Great tangled hoses!" Station Officer Steele exclaimed as cold water cascaded down onto him.
"Oh! Tropical!" Elvis casually remarked, and he started dancing under the spray.
The alert sounded again. This time, Station Officer Steele acknowledged it.
"Oh! Oh! A wizard's battle has caused a wildfire in the mountains, and it's spreading quickly!"
And I thought I'd heard everything… "I think it's going to be one of those days," I said with a resigned sigh.
Elvis and I hurried downstairs. Penny was already putting her uniform back on. Elvis and I quickly did the same.
"Penny, you take Venus," I instructed. "Elvis and I will take Jupiter."
"What about the sprinklers, Sam?" Elvis asked.
I took my work keys out of my pocket, and I went over to a little wall-mounted box next to the fridge. After I'd unlocked it, I flicked the manual override switch for the sprinklers.
"That should do it. I'll set them back to auto as soon as we get back. I'll leave the box open to remind me."
Less than a minute later, we took off in our respective vehicles. I handed my mobile phone to Elvis.
"Can you call Tom, and put him on loudspeaker, please?"
"Sure, Sam."
The loudspeaker function on my phone connected to the Bluetooth system inside Jupiter's cab. Tom's phone rang twice before he answered.
"G'day, Sam."
"How's the party going, Tom?"
"Not too good. I seem to have grabbed the wrong CD."
I exchanged a quick glance with Elvis. "You definitely did! I think the Map-screen 700 will dance itself to destruction very soon. And, if it doesn't, Station Officer Steele's nerves are going to be shot."
Tom groaned audibly. "I'll get back as soon as I can. I can hear sirens. Are you on your way to an emergency?"
"Just another grassfire. Can you think of anything I can do to stop the music?"
"Not off the top of my head, sorry. You could try uninstalling the program."
"I tried doing that, but the system overrode it. I'm not sure what to try next."
"Maybe try and see if there's something on the Map-screen control panel that will stop it?"
"Thanks. I'll try that next. Station Officer Steele pressed something, and it set the sprinklers off."
Tom groaned again. "I'll leave here shortly. There's a mop in the storage cupboard next to the kitchen pantry."
"Thanks. We'll clean up the water when we get back. Oh, I turned the sprinklers off using the manual override. Please check that when you get back in case I forget to reset it."
"Will do. Thanks Sam. See again soon."
"Bye, Tom."
Elvis hung up my phone and he gave it back to me. Minutes later, we arrived at the site of the grassfire. It was about the size of a large bonfire, but it looked like it had stopped spreading.
Penny, Elvis and I got out the hoses, and we started dowsing the fire with water. With the three of us spraying the fire from different angles, it went out quickly.
"There! All out." I put down my hose, and I went over to where Sarah, James, Norman and Mandy were standing. A quick glance at Norman's open backpack told me what had started the fire – matches and sparklers. Norman! I groaned inwardly." Sparklers and dry grass? Not a good mix, Norman."
"Sorry, Fireman Sam," Norman apologised. "I was just trying to be extra magical." He held up the stick that he'd been using as a wand. He was also wearing a wizard's hat and a scarf.
I shook my head slightly in disbelief. He must be so hot in that scarf and hat! "You know what would be really magical?' I asked him mysteriously. "If you stayed out of trouble for the rest of the day!"
"The final scene will be danger-free. I promise."
"Well, let's hope so." Knowing Norman, I wouldn't put it past him to turn something harmless into something dangerous.
Penny and Elvis had packed up our equipment while I'd been talking to the kids, so I returned to Jupiter's cab.
…
The music was still going when we returned to the Mountain Rescue Centre. After I'd put the sprinklers back onto auto, I returned upstairs. Penny and Elvis set about mopping up the water. Taking Tom's advice, I started searching through the Map-screen 700's control panel, looking for options to at least turn the volume down. It didn't seem to have a volume control, since its primary function was to trigger alarms.
"Just make it stop!" Station Officer Steele bellowed. He had his fingers in his ears now, since the pillows hadn't worked.
I pressed another button just as an alert came through. Whoops! I hope I haven't broken it…
"Wally Wizzo, master wizard, is dangling from a zipwire above the waterfall hanging upside-down by his foot."
"I should've seen that one coming, really," I muttered wearily. This was getting to be beyond a joke now. Even Penny no longer seemed amused by it.
Once again, Penny, Elvis and I hurried downstairs. This time, we put on our mountain rescue uniforms.
"I'll take Jupiter. You two take Hydrus," I instructed. "I want you to get down below the waterfall and set up the pontoon, just in case I don't get to Norman in time."
"Okay, Sam," Penny agreed.
I could have taken Venus, but the reason I needed Jupiter was because she had all of our abseiling equipment on board. It would take to long for me to sort out and transfer what I needed into Venus.
Penny drove Hydrus, since she was the only other person who I'd taught to drive her. As I drove Jupiter towards the waterfall, I started to consider my options. I would only have seconds to make a decision when I got there, so I'd need to have several options to chose from.
When I arrived at the top of the waterfall, I found Sarah, James and Mandy standing there waiting for me. I parked Jupiter and jumped down from the cab. Norman was about halfway across the zipwire, dangling from his scarf by just one foot.
I quickly put on my abseiling harness, and I secured a short rope to it. Then, I ran over to the zipwire. I clipped the carabiner at the end of the rope to it before it started to climb upside-down along the zipwire using my hand and legs to keep me up.
In the stream below us, Penny and Elvis had already inflated the pontoon. "Hang tight, Norman!" Penny called. "Sam's coming!"
I crawled as fast as I could go along the zipwire.
"Hurry, Sam!" Norman urged. "Auntie Phyllis gave me this scarf, and it's really cheap…!"
I could see that the scarf caught around Norman's leg was starting to rip. It wouldn't be able to support his weight for much longer. He was also clinging onto a selfie stick with a mobile phone fixed to the end.
"Oh! This is a cliff-hanger," I heard Elvis say. "I can barely watch!"
"Oh! I hope Sam reaches him soon," James whimpered.
"Me too," Mandy added. "I'm almost out of storage space." She was filming the rescue again.
I had almost reached Norman, but I wasn't quite close enough to reach him. At that moment, the scarf gave way, and Norman wailed as he started to fall head-first towards the ground. Using my right hand, I made a wild grab for him almost without thinking about it. Amazingly, my hand closed around his ankle, stopping his fall. My upper body jerked as I absorbed the impact of his weight.
"Gotcha!" I exclaimed happily. But, now I had a dilemma. How to get us both to safety? I needed both hands to climb back, but I couldn't let go of Norman.
"Sam?" Penny called. "Can you turn Norman the right way up and then drop him? We'll catch him."
I hesitated. It was risky, but a controlled fall feet-first was better than an uncontrolled head-first one.
"Please, don't drop me!" Norman begged.
I looked around, trying to see if I had any other options. Wait a minute… I'm on a zipwire… "Norman? I'm going to try and get a better grip of you. Then, we'll run the zipwire to the end."
"Okay, Fireman Sam," Norman agreed, trusting me completely.
Taking a deep breath, I let go of the zipwire with my left hand, and I grabbed Norman's other ankle. I then readjusted my grip around his left ankle. I winced when I felt my left shoulder twinge in protest.
Please don't dislocate on me now… "Ready, Norman?"
"Yes!"
I let go of the zipwire with my legs. The carabiner immediately began sliding down the zipwire at a steady pace. Within seconds, we'd reached the end and safety. I set Norman down on the ground before I stood up and unclipped myself from the zipwire. Greatly relieved, I sat down, massaging my left shoulder.
"Is everything okay, Sam?" Penny asked over the radio.
"Yes, Penny," I replied. "Just taking a breather. I'll take Norman over the stream at the crossing point further up."
"Okay, Sam. We'll see you back at the Mountain Rescue Centre."
"Copy that. Out." I looked over at Norman. "Are you hurt, Norman?"
"No. Thank you for rescuing me."
"That's okay, Norman." I picked up his phone and selfie stick before I stood up. "Let's get going."
A few minutes later, we arrived back at Jupiter. Sarah, James and Mandy were waiting patiently for us. I put my abseiling gear away and then I turned my attention to Norman.
"Norman Price, that could've been much more serious!" I scolded him severely.
"I'm sorry, Fireman Sam. I just wanted to make the most spectacular online movie ever."
"Hmm…" I pondered that thought while I looked at Norman's mobile phone. "Online, eh?" These kids are fantastic with technology. I wonder if they could help us?
"I'll do anything to make it up to you, Sam," Norman added.
"Yes, you will!" I agreed. "And I know just how. You see, we've been having a bit of an issue with some new software we're trying to install at the Mountain Rescue Centre. Tom accidentally installed the wrong software, and we can't stop it."
Norman rubbed his hands together. "Too easy! I can fix it for you, Sam."
"Great! I'll even give you lot a lift. Jump in and put your seatbelts on."
"Yay! We get a ride in Jupiter!" James shouted excitedly.
I smiled as I held the passenger-side door open for the kids.
…
When we arrived at the Mountain Rescue Centre, I took the kids upstairs and I passed Tom's laptop over to Norman.
"Okay, Norman. Work your magic on this."
Grinning, Norman sat down, and he started clicking and typing away. Less than a minute later, the music stopped. The silence was blissfully amazing. I breathed a sigh of relief just as Station Officer Steele entered the room.
"What did you do to stop it, Sam?" he asked in amazement.
I gestured to the kids. "Norman owed me a favour for rescuing him three times today."
At that moment, Penny, Elvis and Tom entered the room. Tom held up the CD.
"Been looking for this?"
"Oh, finally!" Station Officer Steele exclaimed with relief. "You can give that to Norman."
Tom placed the CD down on the table next to the laptop. Norman scoffed.
"I don't need that. See? You just download the new software straight from the internet!" He pressed a button and I saw the upload finish installing. "Tada!"
"It's child's play really," James said.
"So, we don't even need a CD?" I asked, amazed.
Norman laughed as he got up from the table. "CD's are for old people!"
"Old people?" Tom gasped. "That's a bit harsh."
No kidding! I wasn't too impressed by Norman's comment. After all, I'd only just turned fifty-one. I certainly didn't feel that old. Then I remembered what I'd said to Station Officer Steele that morning. Oops. Guess I deserved that.
"New operating system installed," the Map-screen 700 announced.
"Wow! Just like…magic!" I said.
Mandy let out a loud sigh. "I've finished editing the movie! I've even made a bloopers reel to upload." And she came over to Tom's computer.
"Ah! No! Don't do that!" Norman exclaimed in horror.
But Mandy had already plugged her phone in. "Do what?"
"Upload the bloopers!"
"Uploading bloopers now," the Map-screen 700 said.
"Nooooo!" Norman wailed.
The bloopers came up on the big screen. We all watched them. First, Norman dropped a jar of his mother's pickles from a fishing line. Then, there was the moment his kite pulled him out of the train window. I frowned when I saw the moment Norman's sparkler set fire to the grass. And, finally, there was footage of him dangling from the zipwire.
"Look, Norman!" Sarah said as we watched the view counter going up rapidly. "You've gone viral!"
Norman carried his magic wand-stick, over to the rubbish bin. He let out a heavy sigh of defeat. "Disappearing spell! In a bin-io! Zap!" He touched the end of the stick to his head. And with that, Norman tipped the rubbish out of the bin and he inverted it over his head before sipping down on the floor in a slump.
"A disappearing spell? If only it was that easy?' I mused. Sometimes, I'd love to really make him disappear. But then, who would be left for me to rescue?