This story is the sequel to 'The Military Transvestite'.

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Never have, never will.

Guardian Angel Hughes
Hughes giggled wickedly as he thought about what he was going to do. After shoving 2,546 photos of Elysia-chan under the big boss' nose, he'd finally got permission to visit the mortal world.

Hughes clipped a pair of fluffy white chibi wings on the back on his glowing white robes and strode off along the clouds. Two minutes later he came rushing back, grabbed his halo and ran off again, robes flapping behind him.

Al lay next to Roy, sleeping peacefully. After a year of dating, Roy had finally convinced Al to move in with him. It had been another three months before they could convince Ed to let him.

Al sighed and snuggled up to Roy as music softly began to play. It seemed to be coming from nowhere. As it got louder, the lyrics could be made out. 'I like big butts and I cannot lie…'

Hughes appeared, dancing away to the music. Al, always the light sleeper, woke up. He sat up in bed and stared at Hughes. Then he leaned over and nudged Roy. "Wake up"

"Nnnnn… just ten more minutes…" Roy's voice was muffled by his pillow. Al poked him again.

"What? Oh, fine…" muttered Roy. He sat up, and froze mid-yawn as he caught sight of Hughes, still dancing away.

"…Hughes?" he said in a shocked voice.

"Yo!" Hughes stopped dancing and grinned. "Long time no see!"

"Uh huh" Roy was taking this fairly well. "What's with the music?"

Hughes shrugged. "I switched the tapes. Heralding trumpets are so last century"

Suddenly, the music stopped. It was quickly replaced by a slightly crackly fanfare of trumpets. Hughes looked up, miffed. "Hey!" he complained to the ceiling. "I like that song!"

"Just get on with it" boomed the ceiling in reply. It was followed by muffled voices. "…Can't believe this. This is ridiculous. You know how many photos that damn man has? Two thousand, five hun – did anybody turn that microphone off?"

There was a click, then silence. Roy and Al stared at the ceiling, severely disillusioned. Then they turned back to Hughes and stared at him. Hughes grinned at them. Eventually, Roy broke the silence. "Umm… Hughes?"

"Yes?"

"You're wearing football socks and sandals"

"Damn!" said Hughes. "I knew there was something I missed!"

"And a dress"

"It's a robe" Hughes rolled his eyes. "It's traditional"

"And your wings are crooked"

"I was in a hurry to see you"

"Is that a fluffy halo-headband?"

"It's so cute, isn't it!"

"And your dress has short-circuited"

Hughes looked down at his robe. "It has too. Damn budget cuts"

There was another round of silence, then Roy climbed out of bed and thew an arm around his friend. "It's good to see you again"

"Roy?" commented Hughes.

"Yeah?"

"You're naked" (A/N: This is for all you fangirls who missed out in the prequel )

Roy looked around desperately for something to cover himself up with. Grabbing a pillow and holding it over his privates, he shuffled over and grabbed yesterday's pants, which were lying on the floor. He quickly pulled them on.

"So why are you here?" he asked when he was done. "This is just my opinion, but most dead people stay dead"

"I am dead. Can't you tell? I'm an angel" he fluttered his hands and bounced on the spot to emphasise his point.

"Uh huh. Stop avoiding the question"

Hughes grinned mischievously. "Can't I visit some old friends?"

Roy smirked. "See, the thing is, most dead people don't"

Hughes smirked right back at him. "Most dead people aren't me"

Roy laughed at that. "True" he admitted.

Hughes strode over to Al and placed a hand on his shoulder. "I wanted to congratulate you two on getting together. And to tell you that you'd better behave, Roy, 'cause I'll be watching"

"I always knew you were a pervert" muttered Roy.

Hughes laughed. A white light passed over Al before Hughes removed his hand. It went unnoticed. Well, almost unnoticed. Roy narrowed his eyes. "What did you do to Al?"

"Me? I didn't do anything" denied Hughes, the picture of innocence. Roy stared at him suspiciously.

"Honest!" insisted Hughes.

Roy continued to stare at him, sure his friend was up to something, then shrugged and let it drop.

"Hey, since I'm here I should go visit Gracia and Elicia!" said Hughes and he headed for the door. An invisible force dragged him back. Actually, Roy and Al could see the hooks and wire, but for our purposes, it was invisible. Hughes dug his heel into the floor, resisting with all his might. Two evenly-spaced rents appeared in the carpet. "But I wanna see my family…" whined Hughes.

"No" boomed the ceiling.

A shaft of light appeared, focused on Hughes. He slowly drifted through the ceiling, nagging and complaining as the wires dragged him away.

Roy and Al were left blinking at where Hughes had been.

Well, that's the first chapter. It's a little parody about the inner workings of heaven. Hope you enjoyed it.

I know Hughes' wife's name is officially 'Glacier', but I always thought it was 'Gracia' and personally I think 'Gracia' suits her more. So it stays that way.

Please review – reviews are my virtual ramen. Even flames are accepted.