The Ubisoft Awards

by elegate1

Our favorite Ubisoft characters attend to an event to see the commemoration of their hard work. Narrating the POV of the reporters which in this case will be Rayman and Ezio Auditore. Also first story don't mind me. Oh,yes! I DON'T own ANY of the characters of this story. And finally,it has Child of Light in it (Yay!). Reviews are appreciated guys.

Rayman:"Hello everyone! And welcome to the first edition of the Ubisoft Awards! I'm Rayman and I'm here with my co-host: Ezio Auditore Da Firenze."

Ezio:"Hello man, have you seen my fruit of Eden? I think I've lost it…"

Rayman:"No pal, but you know what I've seen lately? Pictures of our new crew. The Child of Light crew!"

Ezio:"Ubisoft Montreal is the shit; they are the ones who'll steal the show tonight. Hey, look, the guests are arriving!"

Rayman:"Okay Ezio, looks like our first guest is Edward Kenway! With his son and grandson, also with Desmond. Btw… No one cares about him."

Ezio:"Indeed no one cares... Dang! Look at those hidden blades… So modern and deadly… mmmh…" *drools*

Rayman:"While Ezio fantasies 'bout hidden blades, let's receive more guests! Here comes Barbara *cough* mah girl. *cough*"

Ezio:"Mmm… Oh yes! She's looking good on that emerald-colored battle armor, even the axe is pimped up, and it seems sharp… Like a hidden blade… mmmh…"

Rayman:"Okay… Anyway, here's my pal Globox with the nymphs."

Ezio:"Yes, oh! *clears throat* Here comes an old Ubisoft star, the one beyond good and evil: Miss Jade."

Rayman:"And his uncle Piggy."

Ezio:"Yes… Hidden blades…"

Rayman:"Oh! Look at that, here's the star of the night, the beautiful, the charming, the powerful: princess Aurora of Lemuria!"

Aurora:"Just Aurora, god dammit!"

Ezio:"Wow, someone's angry… By her side: Rubella and Tristis the jesters, Robert the Bolmus, Finn the Capilli and Gen the Piscean! Hidden blades!"

Rayman:"And that Kategida that accompanies her, Óengus, don't forget about him. Well, look at Aurora; she looks, not good, gorgeous."

Ezio:"Yes indeed. Look, she's flying up to say hello! Sup Aurora, How ya'doing?"

Aurora:"Pretty good, you know? Since I'm a queen and all that stuff."

Ezio:"Are you engaged in something romantic? For the gossip!"

Aurora:"Hidden blades."

Ezio:"Mmmh… Hidden blades…"

Rayman:"So, Aurora, umm… How are you handling all the queen stuff?"

Aurora:"Fine. The humans are accepting the lemurians, they work together to help the ones who lost their home because of the flood."

Ezio:"Hidden blades… Oh, yeah! Relationship?"

Rayman:"Ezio…"

Aurora:"Actually… It's ok, but I like someone doesn't know I'm in love with him."

Rayman:"Who? Give us the premiere!"

Aurora:"Well… This guy Edward is pretty hot… But don't tell him! OMG! It's so embarrassing, I think I'm blushing…"

Ezio:"So my, like, grand-grand-grand-grand…"

Rayman:"While we wait for Ezio, let me ask you a question: Did you know that you are, by far, the most popular character of Ubisoft?"

Aurora:"Really? Who? Me? Popular? How? I'm shy, hot, clever, hot, and I'm a queen. Did I mention that I'm hot?"

Ezio:"Grand-grand-grandson is… hot...? AND WHAT ABOUT ME GODDAMMIT I'M THE ORIGINAL 1337 ASSASSIN!"

Altair:"*Ahem*"

Rayman:"Hey Altair, sup?"

Ezio:"What do you want?"

Aurora:"You're hot too."

Ezio:"What!?"

Altair:"I'm the original assassin, and yes, I'm hot."

Ezio:"And what is with that? I'm hotter than you, you piece of…"

Altair:"Hidden blades."

Ezio:"Hidden blades, mmmh…"

Aurora:"That was cool, and you're hot."

Rayman:"LOL… just, LOL."

Altair:"Here, this is my number babe… call me...MAYBE!oh,goodbye."

Aurora:"Rayman?"

Rayman:"Yes?"

Aurora:"Breaking news! Screw Edward, Altair is now my main squeeze."

Rayman:"Okay, I'm writing that."

Ezio:"Mmmm… Oh shit! Ugh, where's Altair?."

Rayman:"He left."

Aurora:"He was hot."

E:"I'm hotter."

Rayman & Aurora:"No."

Ezio:"Nooooooooooooo!"

Rayman:"Thanks for the interview Aurora! See you in the backstage."

Aurora:"Bye Rayman, I'll go call Altair first."

Ezio:"Fuck you… Fuck you all…" *breaks down in tears*

Rayman:"Come on Ezio, she isn't your type."

Ezio:"No, but I feel insulted… See ya man, I'll get out of here… Toodles."

Rayman:"Okay, as Ezio leaves the room let's talk about… Wait, what is that? Apparently a horde of rabid rabbids has arrived in the town… And they'll get here in three, two, one…"

Rabbid:"BLAAAAAVOLUTION."

Rayman:"No! Get. Away. From. Me! Nooooooodfhbviugievbgdsiuvb…" *dies*

Ezio:"What the fuck is going on here? Oh, shit! Get away! No! Not my penis! Aaaaarghhh..." *dies*

Aurora:"What the… See ya!" *flies away*

Rabbid:"WE ALL BLAAAA TO THE BLAAAA KING… BLAAAAVOLUTION!"

END

And so, the world was conquered by rabid rabbids and all the other companies broke. "BLAAAAA!"