DeathMatch Cats 2:
Next Round
NOTE: I do not own the charcaters of the Pizza Cats, nor the fanfics mentioned in this story...
DIV: Hi everyone and welcome back to Deathmatch and yes the whole one review from the last fights meant that we was given the green light on this fanfic...'cause you see, 1 review means 100 on the ratings...but anyway let me explain the three fights today...and good God, these are mouth-watering, sweet sucking and damn it's gonna be bloody, real bloody! In the first fight, we've got Bad Bird vs. Jerry...and yes we know that these two were in the first one but if you can remember, Lucille, who was the referee blow her top and her rockets killed of Bad Bird and Jerry...so this is a rematch...and how can they fight if they died in the first one??? It's not real folks...deal with it, it's a fanfic! The next fight see's Guido vs. Lucille and the Main Event...Big Cheese vs. Polly...ha, I bet you didn't see that coming. I nearly forgot, my spiecal guest today is the one and only SPEEDY CHERVICHE!
SPEEDY: About time too...I'm never a guest on anything...
DIV: Yeah, whatever...we will explain the last two fights later and why they are pitted against each other but now...it's time for our first match: Bad Bird vs. Jerry Attric...Speedy, how do you see this going?
SPEEDY: Is Lucille referee again?
DIV: Uh...no, shes in the next fight against Guido...
SPEEDY: Ah, well I think Bad Bird will win then...I mean come on, Jerry Attric? There's no contest! If anything, I should've been the one pitted against Bad Bird...
DIV: Did you hear that writer? Remember that for next time...I must say Speedy, that I agree with you...Bad Bird has skill of a-
SPEEDY: No, I didn't say Bad Bird had skill...he's up against an old man...poor dude won't stand a chance. This just goes to show how wimpy Bad Bird is...
DIV: Hmm, harsh words from Speedy...but anyway, yes I've put a wager on Bad Bird to win this...ah, I see no our two fighters are in the ring with our referee: Meowsma. Over to the ring!
Bad Bird and Jerry climb into the ring and walk to the centre, where Meowsma was ready to let th action go.
MEOWSMA: I'm not expecting this fight to last more than ten seconds...but still I want to see carnage. LET'S GET IT ON!
The crowed cheers and Meowma leaves the ring.
BAD BIRD: Shall we just stand here for more than ten seconds to shock the audience that you survived that long?
JERRY: You youngters, always got a head full of rubbish.
BAD BIRD: That's the title you'll get when I finish with you!
JERRY: Really? Try me!
BAD BIRD: As you wish, you old fool!
Bad Bird pulls out his sword and runs at Jerry, but then Jerry twists and turns, just missing the sharp blade and whacks Bad Bird over the back of his head with his walking stick. Bad Bird falls over on his front. He gets up slowly to rub his head and feels his dark green helmet cracked, it was quite a hard blow.
BAD BIRD: Luck shot, old man...
JERRY: The only thing thats old here is your stupid moves!
BAD BIRD: Up yours!
Bad Bird comes at him again, his sword glittering from the lights and rasied up high ready to slash but just as he gets near, Jerry jumps and sommersaults over him, landing on the over side, Bad Bird stops in his tracks, turns around and then...-
JERRY: No, up yours!
Jerry swings his stick upwards to Bad Birds jewels, the pain nearly bursting Bad Bird's eyes...he knelt down to the floor, the pain rushing through his body, he winched a little, trying to keep his tears in his eyes and was holding on like for dear life.
JERRY: You see, Bad Bird, what did I teach you? Nothing, thank God...
Jerry again uses his stick and whacks Bad Bird in the face, making him fall over completly...blood was finally dripping out of his beak, his face felt numb with pain but eventrally ease away and Jerry was waving at the crowed. Bad Bird finally found his sight back too and some strengh somewhere so he grabbed Jerry's foot and pulled it, bringing Jerry flat on his face. Bad Bird got up and towered over Jerry, who was just about to look up but then Bad Bird stamped on his head, he did this several time, until blood was showing and Jerry's beak broke, snapping like a twig.
BAD BIRD: You did my nuts in real good...but tell me, can a old fool like you fly??
Bad Bird grabbed the now weakened Jerry on the neck and blood soaked clothes...Bad Birds wings started flapping and he slowly rasied off from the ground and started soaring in the air...
SPEEDY: Hey, is he allowed to do that?
DIV: They can do anything they want...as long it kills...but I tell you what, this has been a good fight...Jerry did some slick moves but it looks like the old geezer's gonna have his life thrown away.
SPEEDY: That's right, Div, no one can survive from that height, not even a cartoon character!
Bad Bird was soaring in circles, heckling the crowd on.
BAD BIRD: Shall I drop him?
CROWD: YEEEAAAHHHHHHH!
BAD BIRD: What? I can't hear you, say it louder? Do you want me to drop him?
CROWD: YYYYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
BAD BIRD: Hear that you old fool? Can't dissapoint my fans now, can I?
Jerry did not answer apart from spitting out some blood, ready to reply back but it was too late, Bad Bird loosened his grip and Jerry went falling and smacked the ground hard, ripping through the ring's floor and a loud crash could be heard. Bad Bird then slowly flew to the ring and onto his feet...he walked over to the hole to see a figure covered in red blood, which was obivously Jerry. Jerry made no movement and Meowsma came to see the situtration, he too looked and still Jerry made no sign on movement let alone breathing.
MEOWSMA: Well, that's it...BAD BIRD IS THE WINNER!
The crowd cheers.
BAD BIRD: YEAH! WHO'S THE MAIN BIRD, HUH? WHO'S THE MAIN BIRD NOW? ME!
DIV: Well, Speedy, a good fight...
SPEEDY: I've seen better...but I was suprised that Jerry had some desent moves on him...I thought we was in for a shock...
DIV: But not enough for Jerry...at least I win my bet...
Bad Bird went over to the hole again, still mocking at Jerry.
BAD BIRD: Hey, Jerry, call yourself a Ninja Crow? Your just a worthless piece of shi-
Just then a wooden walking stick shoved through Bad Bird's mouth and ripped passed his head, reveiling a blooded stick on the other side.
DIV: WHAT THE HELL?
SPEEDY: It can't be...?!
Jerry poke his head out of the hole and kept pushing his stick through Bad Bird's mouth ho gasped and gagged, feeling the blood trickle every and even in his throat, then Jerry pulled out his stick and Bad Bird gagged even more. Jerry was blooded soaked and determined to carry on fighting, even through his old body had one heck of a beating.
JERRY: Do you like golf? I sure do, it's...relaxing!
Jerry swings back his stick and shouts "FOUR", with that he whacks Bad Bird with an almighty blow on the neck with snaps wetly from inside and Bad Bird was forced to fall down on the floor from the blow and died. The blood was still flowing but Jerry knew he won.
The crowd went silent.
SPEEDY: I don't believe it...
MEOWSMA: Uh...I guess...that...that means...Jerry Attric is THE WINNER EVERYBODY!
Suddently the whole areana errupts into a mighty cheer.
SPEEDY: Wow, what a turn of events...I guess Bad Bird is a wimpy wimp, right Div? ...Div?
DIV: (Crying) NNOOOO! It's not fair, damn it! IT'S NOT FAIR! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
SPEEDY: Oh, yeah, you lost the bet...well...uh...join us for the next fight on Chapter two, where it will be Guido vs. Lucille. See you soon.