Alfons knew that it was impossible.
Partly, because they were both guys, but the main concern was that he looked like his friend's brother.
He held his older friend in his arms during one of Edward's moments that he could hardly bear with the loss.
Sometimes in these moments Alfons Heidrich wanted to say, "Let me be him for now; let me be yor brother."
That wasn't really what he wanted though; he wanted so much more.
He wanted to wake up with him, and know that all was right with the world for a moment.
He longed for the moments that could only be shared with someone that had claimed your heart, not just as a lover as anything that the person feels comfortable with.
Alfons wanted his last precious months of life to be joyous, and to consist of him being loved by the man that could not love him for a wide range of reasons.
He often times felt that he wanted that more than a legacy of any sort, but when he died, he couldn't have asked for a better life.
He knew that very few would miss him, but his love would.
Alfons had always wanted his friend's happiness more than his own.
May be that was why he had never voiced his forbidden feelings that had longed to be shared, and to just get out of him.