A/N: Yes, I do realize it has been years (literally) since I posted anything on this account. I'm not saying I'm officially back (life is hectic unfortunately), but nonetheless I decided to share this with you guys. I came up with the idea while I was work (obviously I must be fully concentrating on my job). This is a oneshot and I really hope it's a good read.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Warning: Mild torture. Insanity. Character Death. Dark themes.
"I was in the darkness,
So darkness I became"
-Florence and the Machines, Cosmic Love-
Kel was not sure when the line between good and evil had become blurred to her.
At one point in her life, Kel had held one of the most honorable positions in Tortall. She was a page- a page who would be expected one day to achieve knighthood and guard the kingdom and its king until his or her dying breath.
Except here Keladry was now, plotting to murder the same king that she should have been defending. The eighteen year olds world was deeply twisted, but Keladry had to remind herself that none of this was her fault.
They had pushed her to this point of no return. They were the one who robbed her of her dreams of knighthood for the mere sake of filthy politics. They were the ones who caused her to transform from one of the most righteous people in the kingdom into a common criminal. They only had themselves to blame for unleashing one of the most lethal forces of nature in Tortallan history.
It had all started on that cursed day, when she was still Kel and Keladry was locked safely away in the depths of her mind. It was on that day Sir Wyldon of Cavall had decimated her biggest dream by dismissing her from page training and basically branded her as a failure to the entire kingdom.
Kel had been devastated beyond belief. All the time and commitment she had put into her training; all of the mornings she rose before dawn to do arm exercises just to keep up with the boys; all of the nights she slaved over her academic work; all of it had been a complete waste.
Kel ended up leaving the page's wing without even saying goodbye to Neal and her other friends. She told herself that she didn't want their pity, but to be truthful, Kel was too embarrassed to face them. She didn't want to be the one to tell them that she had failed.
So, Kel had quietly slipped away from the palace and returned to her family's townhouse in Corus. Upon greeting her parents, the eleven year olds' head had been lowered in shame, while her face reflected a void of any emotion. All of her anger, frustration and disappointment had been hidden away for her parents' sakes, but unfortunately for the young girl, it was very much there.
These tumultuous emotions would have driven a normal person to a fit of rage or perhaps tears, but Kel had instead allowed it to eat away inside of her, believing that it made her appear stronger, even braver. However, during the night, when she was all alone in her room, the girl discovered that emotional pain could feel as horrible as physical pain.
Kel's parents were no fools and they could still see, despite her best efforts to hide it, how much their youngest child was truly hurting. Ilane and Piers decided that they were going to spend as much time as they could with Kel over the next month in order to help their daughter take her mind off of things. They did some shopping, went on picnics and even spent a week in Port Cayann to vacation on the seaside. Kel was grateful for the company, but soon the King ordered the Baron and Baroness to return to the Yamani Islands to negotiate a trade agreement.
Piers and Ilane had asked Kel if she would like to accompany them, but their daughter declined their offer. It was embarrassing enough for the eleven year old that everyone in Tortall knew she was a failure. She did not want to face the judgment of her Yamani friends too.
It was in those next twelve months that Kel took the first steps into becoming Keladry. Twelve months she spent alone in her room, only emerging to eat. The girl had read a lot- Neal would have been proud of her- but she also found herself immersed in her own thoughts. Kel thought repeatedly about her own shortcomings, she thought about those who stood purposely in the way of her dreams- Joren, Lord Wyldon and the King- but she also thought about something that was quite unusual for Kel: revenge.
Revenge.
Revenge was something Kel of Mindelan always stayed far far away from. There was no need for revenge in Kel's book because she believed that everything would naturally right itself in the end. As they say, good always conquers evil.
However, good wasn't conquering evil in Kel's case. After six months, she still resided inside her own bedroom in an attempt to hide from the world. Anger and regret were a constant shadow thrust upon her. They made it hard for her to think straight, to even breathe.
Where is the fairness in all of this? Kel had wondered one day.
And that was when Keladry spoke to her for the first time…
You have to create your own fairness, a voice in the back of her mind told her. Right the wrongs against you.
At first, Kel believed that meant she had to think of other ways to become a warrior. She had to prove herself to the rest of the country that she really could do it; that she could rise above their narrow minded prejudices.
Originally, the idea had sounded innocent enough to her. Kel made a list of possible career paths such as joining the Riders or returning to the Yamani Islands to continue her training with Nariko. However, Keladry wasn't happy with any of these options. She told Kel neither of those things would right the wrongs. It would just make her appear lower in the eyes of Joren, Wyldon and the King. Their statuses as fighters would still be higher than her own. Keladry demanded that Kel formulate a new plan, a better one.
Kel tried for the next few months to think of anything that would be good enough for the voice in the back of her head, but nothing appeased Keladry…
These men destroyed your life! Keladry would remind Kel. Can't you think of anything better?
I'm trying! Kel pleaded inside her own head.
Well, try harder, Keladry had hissed back.
It was early August, when Piers and Ilane of Mindelan had returned to Corus. To say they were taken aback by their daughter's condition would be an understatement. Shock could really be the only word that could describe it. Kel was not only a ghostly pale color from the months she spent locked away in her room, but her once shortly cropped mousy brown hair was now straggly and hung bellow her shoulders. The twelve year old had lost weight too, along with the muscles she had built up from her year at the palace. It was as if the Baron and the Baroness had left behind their daughter and came back to an entirely different person.
"Piers, we have to do something about Kel. She's practically killing herself," Kel had overheard her mother say one night.
Her parents had been talking in the town house's parlor a week after their return to Tortall and Keladry had convinced her that it would be a good idea to listen in on them. Normally, Kel would never eavesdrop, especially on her parents, but Keladry had become very persuasive lately...
"I know. I can't believe how hard she's taken her dismissal," Piers had replied in a weary voice. "It's as if she's completely shattered."
Silence fell over the parlor, before Kel heard her mother sigh.
"Maybe a change of scenery would do her well," Ilane suggested. "I'm sure knowing how close the palace and her friends are isn't doing her any good."
"You're probably right," Piers told his wife. "But where should we send her?"
"I know Kel will kill me for even proposing this, but perhaps some time in the City of the Gods would help,"
Kel felt her heart drop into the pit of her stomach. Her Ma wanted to send her to the convent?
"You want to send her to the convent?" her father repeated. "Well, I guess it couldn't hurt. It would certainly take her mind off of things and it's better than watching her stay here and wallow around in her own grief."
Ilane sighed again, "So, it's decided then. We'll tell Kel in the morning."
Upon hearing those final words, Keladry had let out a shriek inside Kel's head.
No!
Kel put her hands over her own ears in an attempt to silence the unbearably loud voice inside her head. It was futile though and the twelve year old had to bite down on her lip to keep herself from crying out in pain until Keladry fell silent.
Return to your room, Keladry hissed. Now!
Kel obeyed the voice and in order to not attract her parent's attention, slowly and quietly made her way back upstairs. Once she had closed and locked her bedroom's door behind her, Keladry let out a fierce tirade,
You are not going to spend years locked away in that prison, the voice told her. We are leaving-tonight.
And go where? Kel had demanded to know. My family will find out, if I return to Mindelan.
We aren't going back to Mindelan. Keladry informed her sharply. We are going to do some traveling and in the process, we are going to get you back into fighting shape.
Kel had instantly brightened up at the idea. It had been a long time since she had trained in any way. This new confidence Keladry instilled in her must have meant that the voice in the back of her head believed that she was strong enough to become a warrior after all. Kel let a small smile slip out. She was glad that at least one person in the world believed she could do it. Even her own parents had given up on her dreams to become a warrior for Mithros sake! They were going to send Kel to the convent!
That night, Kel had packed up some of her clothes, pocket money, and weapons. Plus, Keladry convinced her to steal some food from the kitchens, all of it for her long journey ahead. Kel then took a reliable mare from the stables and at dawn, she escaped the clutches of Tortall's capital.
The next year and a half were the hardest of Kel's entire life. She wandered around Tortall, almost aimlessly. It was only the voice in the back of her head that directed Kel where to go. Keladry had given her strict commands and Kel followed them blindly and without questions. If Kel questioned Keladry's authority in any way, she discovered that severe pain would erupt in her head, making it impossible to think, to even function. In the long run, it saved Kel a lot of effort and hurt to just agree with the voice.
Keladry took them everywhere, from Port Cayann all the way to the Scanran border. Kel luckily never stumbled across anyone she knew, though it was not difficult for the twelve year old to not notice that Keladry had steered them leagues clear of her home fief, when they headed north.
The journey wasn't all about travelling though. Kel worked relentless hours to get back into the stellar shape that she once was. She ran every single day to raise her endurance, sometimes for two hours straight. Kel also worked on her glaive skills. She relearned old pattern dances and picked up new ones from the Yamani travelers that she came across.
Archery was another skill that she was determined to master once again. Kel needed a new bow and arrows and exchanged her services at a local fletcher for the weapon. In the beginning, her archery had been rusty, but her skills slowly began to return to her as time went on.
When Kel decided she was sufficient enough, she had entered an archery tournament at a nearby village. It was at that archery tournament that she met a man who would end up changing her entire life.
The Shang Wolverine was a Yamani in his early twenties. He too had entered the archery competition and unlike Kel, who had come in third, he had won the entire thing. The Shang approached the now thirteen year old after the award ceremony.
"Your skills are quite impressive," the older man had complimented her.
Kel bowed Yamani style and then replied in the tongue of that country, "Thank you very much. So are yours,"
The Shang's eyebrows had raised enough that only a true Yamani could detect that he was surprised.
"Are you from the Islands?" the Shang Wolverine asked, switching over to his native language.
"I lived there for six years," Kel admitted and then let the man look her over. He probably wondered how she went from living in the Yamani Islands to her current state. Her brown hair had grown untamed over the last eighteen months and her clothing, which had once been in pristine condition, was now covered with dirt and tears. She looked like a wild woman.
"You have the build of a warrior young one," the Shang observed. "Did you happen to train with old Nariko while you lived on the Islands?"
Kel nodded and then added humbly, "I'm rusty though."
The corner of the Yamani's mouth had turned slightly upward, before it returned to its customary position.
"I'm sure you can't be that out of practice," the older man drawled, before suddenly lashing his foot out.
Only instinct made Kel twist out of the way in time. The thirteen year old quickly recovered and tried to sneak in a punch of her own. The Shang blocked it easily and then delivered a blow towards her stomach. Kel barely brought her arm up to stop him from knocking the air out of her stomach. They struck at each other a few more times, before the Shang feinted to the left. Kel, the more inexperienced warrior followed and then he came down full force on her collar bone.
The girl gasped in pain and surprise, before landing on her behind in the dirt. The fight was over and she had lost. Kel hung her head in defeat. The girl had been thoroughly trounced.
The Shang Wolverine gave her a hand up, "That wasn't too bad,"
"Not for you," Kel retorted.
Ask the Shang if you can train with him, Keladry's voice inside her head was harsh and demanding as usual, but this time there was also an added sense of urgency. It was as if she realized something important that Kel had not.
"Where are you travelling next?" the thirteen year old had asked the Yamani.
"West," he replied. "Towards the desert,"
"Can I come with you?" the girl pleaded, trying her best not to appear too desperate.
The Yamani had then started to survey her with his dark, emotionless brown eyes. It was if he could tell just by looking at her if she was strong enough to be his student. Finally, after a few tense moments for Kel, the Shang Wolverine gave her a firm nod.
"Alright," he told her. "We leave at dawn tomorrow."
Keladry had allowed Kel to smile.
"Thank you very much," she said, before bowing Yamani style towards the man. "You won't regret it."
"With skills like your little one, I doubt I will,"
Kel had travelled with the Shang Wolverine for two long years. It was the most challenging time of her entire life, but it was well worth it. The girl soon became so formidable in hand-to-hand combat, archery and her dagger work that anyone who had the misfortune of doing battle with her would be thoroughly trounced by the fifteen year old. Admittedly, her glaive work had suffered since she had gotten so caught up with her lessons with the Shang, but Keladry had convinced Kel that it wasn't as important as her new found skills.
It was two weeks before Midwinter, when Keladry had asked,
When is Joren's ordeal?
Probably during the holiday, Kel replied inside her head. Why?
We're leaving for Corus, the voice announced.
Excuse me?
Pain started to form at the back of her skull and suddenly, it felt like a hundred knives were being thrust into her brain. Only Kel's years on the Yamani Islands prevented her from crying out in pure agony.
Tell the Wolverine you are leaving today and thank him for his time and services, Keladry growled at her. And keep your stupid opinions to yourself girl.
Kel had obeyed the voice in the back of her head without anymore protestations. She bode farewell to the Shang-who hid his surprise, even for a Yamani, very well at her unexpected announcement-, packed up her mare with her few possessions and then began her journey back to Tortall's capital.
She reached Corus a few weeks later and, at the time, had kept a very low profile. Kel missed her parents and friends and desperately wished to see them for the first time in nearly four years, but Keladry commanded her to stay far away from them. The fifteen year old was disappointed, yet she did not speak a word against the authority of the voice in the back of her head out of fear of the unbearable pain she knew would come if she did so.
It was in Tortall's capital that Keladry started taking control even more. She used to let Kel talk for herself and have free reign over her own body's actions; however, the voice had decided that the girl couldn't even be trusted to do that. Keladry seized total power, locking Kel away inside the depths of her mind to prevent her from protesting, and one night the fifteen year old found herself slipping passed the palace guards and into the grounds, completely unaware of the voice's intentions.
It was only when she stood outside of Sir Joren of Stone Mountain's door fully armed that Kel realized something was terribly wrong.
What are you doing? Kel hissed at the voice. Joren is a knight of the realm!
Isn't this what you wanted four years ago Kel, fairness? Keladry shot back mockingly. Well, you're about to see the beginning of things righting themselves again for you.
Not like this! Kel protested inside her head. Not through murder!
Pain had instantly hit her skull like a ton of bricks. She gasped and nearly fell to the floor, with only Keladry's control over her body preventing her from doing so. After a few long moments it subsided and Keladry forced her to pick the lock to the knight's room. Kel tried to fight against the voice in her head with all the strength she could muster, but her efforts were futile. Keladry was in full power.
Keladry snuck into Joren's quarters without making a single sound, before closing the door quickly behind her. Kel could only look on in horror, as Keladry padded across the cold wooden floor and actually grinned, when she spotted the blonde, handsome knight. Joren was fast asleep and completely unaware of the monster descending upon him.
Keladry pulled a cloth from the pack she wore on her bag, along with a dagger. Without wasting a single second, she stuffed the cloth into the knight's mouth to prevent him from crying out. Joren gagged and his eyes flashed open instantly. Before he could even attempt to spit out the cloth, the cold steel of Keladry's dagger was pressed against his neck.
"Don't even try to fight me Joren of Stone Mountain," Keladry had hissed. "You'll be dead, before you even can move an inch. Now get up and sit in the chair," she pointed to a wooden chair in the corner of the room, "And no funny business or you'll be sorry," the fifteen year old added in a threat.
Joren had stared blankly back at her for a moment, before obeying Keladry's commands. He shuffled over to the chair and took a seat. Keladry held him at knife point, as she tied him tightly to the chair with rope from her pack. It was only when she was finished, did she talk again.
"Do you remember me Joren?" Keladry asked. Her hazel eyes were narrowed towards the man.
The knight shook his head. He had looked anxious, as if he was going to wet himself at any moment.
"Does Keladry of Mindelan ring any bells?"
Joren's ice blue eyes widened like saucers and he suddenly spit out the cloth.
"The Lump?" he cried out, purely appalled.
Keladry had smirked at the old insult. It no longer bothered her, especially since she held power over her old nemesis now.
"So you do remember me," she said, still holding the dagger to the knight's neck. "I knew you would. After all, I'm sure you still brag to all your little conservative friends about helping drive the first known girl in over a century to tryout out for her knighthood out of page training. I bet you're really proud."
"Damn right I am," Joren had sneered at her, before spitting at her feet.
The fool didn't possess the common sense to keep his mouth shut. Didn't he realize that she held the dagger to his throat that would determine if he was going to live or die? Keladry sighed, but knew she shouldn't really be too surprised. This was Joren she was dealing with after all. The boy's weakness had always been that he had been too set in his own ways. She would have to show him how wrong he really was.
"Unfortunately for you Joren, I'm no longer a Yamani Lump who pretends that she possess no emotions," Keladry told the blonde haired knight coldly. "I'm actually quite angry with you for all the insults you dared to hurl at me years ago and for all of times you and your stupid friends beat on me for just being a girl," the dagger pressed harder against Joren's neck and the sharpness of the blade had caused for some blood to trickle down onto the man's sleeping clothes, staining it, "You know deep down inside that I would have been an excellent knight and yet, you insisted on standing in my way. You destroyed my dreams Joren of Stone Mountain and now I'm going to destroy you."
Before the knight could protest, Keladry had stuffed the cloth back into his mouth roughly and then grasped her dagger by the metal end. She drove the weapon's hilt with all the strength she could muster, into Joren's kneecaps. They shattered instantly.
The blonde knight's screams of agony were muffled by the cloth inside of his mouth, but Keladry relished in the fact that tears ran down his face and sweat had began to form at his brow. The fifteen year old had let Joren sit there in pain for a few more moments, surveying her prey with hazel eyes that were void of any emotion, before inflicting more damage upon him.
She thrust one of her longer daggers into the knight's stomach and cut down towards his bowels. A stench crept out of his body and the girl knew with a great deal of satisfaction that she had penetrated his intestines. It wouldn't be long until the bastard met the Black God.
Joren, whose face was now pale as a ghost's from blood loss and drenched in sweat, had somehow managed to spit out the cloth. The knight had begun to beg, his voice quivering out of fear, "Please stop! You're killing me!"
Instead of replying, Keladry spat in Joren's face and then proceeded to hit the knight on the cheek with the hilt of her dagger. The force of the blow knocked the blonde haired man and the chair he was tied to onto the ground. Joren's blood was now beginning to seep into the floorboards.
"You had your chance Stone Mountain," Keladry growled. "It's time for things in this kingdom to be righted again and for you to meet the Black God."
With one swift movement, the fifteen year old cut the knight's throat, instantly killing him. She had stepped out of the way of the spray of blood that had erupted from his aorta just in time. She did not want to draw suspicion from a crimson liquid stain on her tunic.
When she was certain the terrible deed was completed, Keladry had caught her breath and ran her hands through her mousey brown hair. Finally, after all these years of waiting she was finally able to take the first steps in her plan of revenge that would eventually rock the entire kingdom of Tortall.
The girl knew what to do next, since it had been a part of her plan for years. Keladry grasped the blood covered blade firmly in one hands, while supporting Joren's lifeless head in the other. She pressed the metal into the knight's forehead, and not lightly either. The blade dug into Joren's skin, until the fifteen year old carved these letters - KoM- which was supposed to stand for Keladry of Mindelan. It was her insignia, proof that she was the one who had conquered after all these years.
Kel had woken up the next morning, her head throbbing. She sat up in bed, dazed for a moment, before realizing that she was currently residing in the inn that she had been renting a room from the past week.
She had started to breathe a sigh of relief, but suddenly memories began to hit her repeatedly. It felt like her mind was a fortress and the memories were like a battering ram. They kept hitting against her mental defenses, until it ruptured and the memories poured fully in.
Joren- a dagger- the letter KoM being carved into a forehead…
Kel gasped out loud. What had she done?
You set things right, Keladry whispered from the back of her mind, before she could break out into a complete panic.
You're insane! Kel cried. This isn't setting things right. You just committed murder for Mithros sake! How does anyone set things right by killing another person?
You finally got your revenge! Keladry hissed. You should be happy. All of the pain and humiliation that Joren put you through has been brought to justice once and for all.
Kel ran her hands through her hair and massaged her temples. She couldn't believe this was happening. Sure, Joren's bullying had been wrong, but that didn't change the fact that Kel practically murdered him in cold blood. That was a hundred times worse!
The fifteen year old had wanted to vomit and she did. Kel stumbled into her privy and emptied her stomachs' meager contents.
You are so weak, Keladry told her coldly. This is why I have to do everything myself. I had to convince you to run away from home. I had to convince you to become the Wolverine's student and I had to convince you to do away with Joren. Without me, you'd probably be still wasting away in your bedroom, grieving over your broken dreams.
'Convince', Kel spat back to the voice in her head. You didn't convince me to do anything. You forced me! If I knew that you were planning to kill Joren this entire time, I would have never agreed to get back in shape and train with the Shang Wolverine. You've turned me into a killing machine!
Cruel laughter had echoed inside her mind, Are you really that simple minded to believe these years of training were only about doing away with a measly knight like Joren of Stone Mountain?
Kel felt a shiver go up her spine that had nothing to do with the blistery winter weather outside the inn. What had she unleashed upon the world? Keladry was not a supportive voice in the back of her head that Kel originally thought she was. She was a full-fledged monster.
Who else do you plan on harming? Kel demanded to know.
As if I would reveal that to you, Keladry said with an air of pompousness. You'll just spoil my plans.
I won't let you get away with this, Kel had vowed defiantly. I'll fight against you until my last breath.
Keladry laughed again and instinct made Kel cover her ears at the increased volume, even though she knew the sound was coming from inside her head. The noise was almost unbearable.
I'd like to see you try, Keladry drawled, before attacking her brain with sharp, stabbing pains that were more intense than usual.
Kel's self control shattered and she cried out before falling to her knees, clutching her head in anguish. She had never felt so awful in her entire life and soon, she was slipping into the darkness of unconsciousness. With one last gasp for air, she allowed herself to become enveloped completely in it.
The next five months, Kel continued to live as if her eyes were being shrouded by a thin veil. She could see what Keladry was doing through her own eyes, which now served the purpose as a window to the prison that was now her mind, but she didn't possess an ounce of control over the voice.
It was one day in June, when Keladry's control had slipped and Kel was allowed to gain a baring over her new surroundings. She was in a village- that much was certain. Kel was surrounded by small homes and shops, but the girl had absolutely no clue where this village was located or why Keladry had brought them here in the first place.
"Hurry up an' fetch your Papa," Kel had overheard a plump woman with an apron on telling a small boy. "My lord Wyldon just informed me he'll be stayin' in our inn tonight."
Oh gods no.
Keladry seemed to grin somewhere inside her mind.
Wyldon is good as dead.
My lord is a seasoned knight. A measly teenager like you isn't going to take him by surprise.
You underestimate your own strength and my own cunningness, Keladry told her. You don't realize how powerful you really are Kel of Mindelan and your ignorance is what makes you weak. You could seize the power, but you chose not to and that's where I come in…
Kel had felt darkness closing in around her, as Keladry sealed her back into her own mind. She tried crying out. She tried to pound against the walls, but her efforts were futile. Keladry was an unmovable object. Kel realized with a sense of bitterness that she hadn't even had a chance to enjoy her freedom fully. Keladry had seized control, before she could truly savor it.
The sun set and rose again and Keladry was now standing perched on the lower limb of an oak tree a few miles away from the village. She ignored the sweat breaking out on her bow and the lurch in her stomach that was a result from the height that she was currently at. Instead, she had closed her eyes and listened to the sounds of the woods around her. A bird sang in the distance and by the sound of crunching leaves and breaking twigs, an animal of some sort was scouring around on the forest floor below her.
Suddenly, the 'clopping' sound of hoof beats had reached Keladry's ears and the now sixteen year old girl let out a feral grin. Her prey was approaching slowly, but surely.
When a man on a stallion trotted closer to her hiding spot, Keladry recognized her former training master immediately. The scar that had marred his arm many years ago was still very visible- especially since he was wearing short sleeves on account of it being summertime- and so was the customary scowl Lord Wyldon that always graced his face. Keladry thought the man would have relaxed once he was away from the pages and lost the stony expression.
I guess Neal was right. Once a stump always a stump, Keladry had thought wryly.
The sixteen year old soon had a clear shot of the knight's war horse. She was disappointed that she would have to slaughter an innocent animal, but it didn't stop her from pulling back her bow's string and burying an arrow deep into the beast's chest.
The horse, startled about the unexpected attack, had reared on its hind legs and subsequently spilled its rider. Keladry heard Lord Wyldon let out a grunt of pain from the fall, as she leapt off the tree branch and landed nimbly on the forest floor.
Lord Wyldon's sword was already out of its' sheath by the time Keladry emerged from the thicket. When the knight spotted the girl, his eyes widened with surprise. He had not anticipated a female behind the attack.
"Do you know who I am chit?" the training master had growled, his usual cool demeanor broken. Keladry decided to let the old man talk. She wanted to gage how injured he was from his fall of his horse. "I'm a knight of the realm. I can have your head for this!"
"I'm well aware of who you are Wyldon of Cavall," Keladry replied frostily. "The real question is, do you remember me?"
The knight had surveyed her through his stone brown eyes for a few moments, before shaking his head.
"I don't recall your face."
Kel had shrugged, not in the least surprised or angry that he had forgotten the face of the only girl in over a century to knowingly try for her knighthood. It was to be expected.
"That's alright. I'll reveal myself to you in a few minutes," the sixteen year old had promised grimly, ignoring Kel's weak protestations that were starting to surface from the back of her mind. They were like a mild headache. Annoying, but they could easily be brushed aside.
Then, without warning, Keladry yanked a dagger from her belt and with great speed, she hurled it at the knight.
Lord Wyldon clearly did not possess the swiftness of his younger years. He managed to twist away to prevent the weapon from burying itself into his heart, which was Keladry's original intention, but the dagger had still managed to catch him slightly below his clavicle.
The knight's eyes had screwed up in obvious pain, but he did not cry out. Instead, wincing, he pulled the blade from his upper chest, before he charged her. Keladry had let him do it, banking that his injuries from the horse and his new shoulder wound would slow the training master down.
The sixteen year old was correct. It had been almost too easy to evade the older man's attacks, though she did receive a small graze on her left forearm, where his sword had managed to scrape her.
Keladry soon became bored with their fight and had decided to end it. Two years with her own personal Shang tutor helped her deliver a harsh blow to Lord Wyldon's sword arm. The knight dropped his weapon- Keladry had suddenly thought of Nariko on the Yamani Islands who would have deeply scolded the man for his blunder- and the sixteen year old took advantage of that. With a swift kick, she swept Lord Wyldon's legs out from under him. The knight could only blink before the metal blade of Keladry's second dagger rested on the tip of his nose.
"Do you yield?" the girl had asked.
Lord Wyldon was breathing heavily, but still managed to mutter a 'Yes'.
"Good," Keladry said, smirking, as she surveyed her former training master. She was glad that she had lived on the Islands. If it wasn't for her mask, she would have literally been shaking in anticipation. She desperately wanted to get her next kill.
"Who are you?" the knight demanded. "Any who do you want me dead?"
"I'm hurt that you don't remember me my lord," Keladry drawled, as if she were a player. The other girl she shared her mind with, Kel, would have never spoken to her former training master this way. She was too stiff and overly polite to dream of ever saying such a thing. Luckily, Keladry was in free reign now and Kel, the wooden plank, was deeply buried in her mind. "Especially since I was the scourge of your existence only a mere five years ago,"
"Mindelan?"Wyldon had gasped, his eyes nearly bugging out of his head.
"I'm surprised you even remember my fief," Keladry admitted. "I swore beforehand you would have addressed me as 'probationary page' when you realized it was me."
"Mithros, you've changed," her former training master breathed. "What happened to you? Everyone thinks you're dead."
Keladry laughed, shocking Wyldon. He had never seen Mindelan express her emotions this freely before. The girl he remembered was as emotional as a rock.
"Dead? Well, Kel probably wishes she were," Keladry had joked, leaving Wyldon quite confused. "No, I am very much alive. I've been bidding my time the last five years, waiting for Kel to get stronger- strong enough to kill you and that awful boy from Stone Mountain."
"Joren?" the knight said. "Somebody already beat you to the punch. They broke into his rooms in the middle of the night and slit his throat."
Kel smirked. Was the man that stupid?
"They shattered his kneecaps too, right?" the smirk never left the girls face. "And they carved something into his forehead…"
"K-O-M, Keladry of Mindelan," Wyldon breathed, as the pieces came together in his head, and then added. "It was you!"
Keladry had nodded, "Yes, it was me, a simple girl who brought around the death of your golden boy. How does it feel to know that a mere female could defeat a mighty warrior like Joren? Does it feel like a slap in the face to everything you believed in?"
The knight had ignored those questions and instead, asked one of his own, "Why are you doing this?"
Keladry pressed the tip of her dagger into the tip of her dagger into the training master's nose until it drew blood.
"Well, that's an easy question," her voice regained its original coldness and then she told him, "Revenge. Your death and Joren's is revenge for destroying my biggest dream- my dream of knighthood. You stole it away from me." Keladry growled angrily. "You made weak excuses why I couldn't be as good as the boys. Well, you were wrong my lord. I am as good, if not better than the boys. I was able to kill Joren and defeat you. Not even you can question my abilities now."
The knight had sighed and nodded.
"You're right Mindelan," he admitted to Keladry's astonishment. She felt Kel stir in the back of her mind also at the revelation. "You are as good as the boys and you would have been a great knight. I was wrong to dismiss you and for that I'm sorry."
Don't kill him. Please, Kel had begged from her prison that Keladry locked her into.
"Sorry won't save you now," Keladry spat, pushing Kel's annoyingly persistent voice out of her head. Her dagger was now lowered to the man's throat. "Don't you see that my life is ruined? First of all, I won't ever be a knight-"
"You can still be a Rider," Wyldon had cut in.
At the suggestion, Keladry had felt a surge of anger and kicked him across the face, causing the man to land on his side on the dirt road.
"Don't take me as a fool, Wyldon of Cavall," Keladry had hissed. "There is no coming back from something like this or Joren's death. I'm a criminal now, an enemy to the crown. I will never be able to serve them."
"But-" Wyldon tried to interject. However, Keladry instantly silenced him again with a blow to the ribs. She must have broken a few because the man's eyes watered from pain.
"Not another word my lord," Keladry growled. "You have earned your fate."
No! Kel had cried inside her head, realizing what she was about to do, but it was too late.
Without any warning, Keladry slit the man's throat just as she did to Joren. Blood splattered and this time, she could not fully avoid it as some sprinkled her breeches. The girl sighed, knowing she would have to purchase new ones.
Keladry then grasped her former training master by the back of his tunic and carved her initials into his forehead. When she was finished, she spat on his face, before leaving his body in the roadway. Someone would eventually discover it. Keladry hoped secretly that the Stormwings would. The man deserved their desecration after what he did to her.
All of these events led up to where Keladry was now, locked away in the room of an inn. The floor plans of the palace were laid out across the table and she had drawn marks where the king's quarters were and any secret passages surrounding it. Outside, the eighteen year old could hear the bustling sounds of Corus during the daytime- merchants trying to entice customers, children playing, lovers quarrelling. However, what they didn't know was that atrocities the kingdom had never seen were being planned only feet away from them.
Two long years had passed between Wyldon of Cavall's death. Tortall was now beginning to conduct war with their neighbors from the north, Scanra, whose clans had united under a new warlord.
Keladry had been lying low. The training master's death had caused a greater ruckus than she could have ever imagined. Two well known conservatives had been murdered and at court, fingers were pointing everywhere. To maintain peace, King Jonathan had offered a hundred gold crowns for the killer dead or alive. So far, no one had made any efforts to capture her, but Keladry was not taking any chances. She would get her revenge and in full.
Finally, the plans were set. Keladry had sent King Jonathan a threatening note, so she could take in the satisfaction that the king would be fretting her arrival, and then she stocked up on her weapons. For the assassination attempt, she armed herself with six daggers and her bow and arrows. Keladry decided to leave her glaive behind. It would draw too much attention.
Keladry entered the palace in the morning, disguised in the uniform of a Rider that she stole from their barracks. She hung around the indoor practice courts- since it was February- in an attempt to blend in. The eighteen year old even conducted in a few light bouts with some members of the King's Own.
However, nightfall could not come fast enough for Keladry. She was ready to complete her plans for revenge that she cooked up over six years ago. The king that originally put her under an unfair probation would perish by her hand.
Unfortunately, Kel had been acting out a lot more lately, having sensed that the king's assassination was near. This annoyed Keladry and she was forced to only lightly seal the mental prison that held the weaker version of herself. She did not want that little brat zapping her energy, when everything she wanted was so near.
The bell that signaled midnight echoed throughout the palace and Keladry decided it would be time to penetrate the king's quarters. She slinked through the hallways like a cat, checking each corner for guards. So far, Keladry had been lucky. No one was stupid or ill-fated enough to get in her way.
The door to the king's quarters soon was in sight. However, the cost was far from clear. Two knights stood guard outside. Keladry swore heavily under her breath. This was going to be harder than she anticipated.
The eighteen year old took out her bow and carefully aimed an arrow at the first knight, a man in his early forties with graying black hair. She pulled back almost silently and watched with satisfaction as the arrow punctured the knight's throat, instantly killing him.
The second knight's eyes widened like saucers, as he watched his fallen comrade fall to the floor without any warning. His hands glowed green- Keladry knew it was his gift- as he desperately tried to save the man. Keladry knew it was too late for the older knight and she descended upon the foolish knight-healer, a dagger grasped tightly in her right hand.
Keladry was about to do away with the knight with the redish-brown hair- a quick throat slitting would have done the trick- when Kel burst through her prison with surprising strength and then swiftly overpowered her. Keladry shrieked in defiance.
How dare you?
Kel ignored the voice and banished it firmly to the back of her mind. She was free for the first time in two years and it felt unbelievably good. However, before she could savor it, Kel remembered what or should she say who gave her the strength to break through Keladry's prison in the first place.
"Neal?" Kel whispered, her voice quivering. Her dagger slipped from her hand and collided against the stone floor with a clatter causing the healer to turn around.
"Kel?" the knight replied, his jaw slacked from surprise. All thoughts of his dead fellow knight flew out the window with the sudden appearance of his best friend. He couldn't believe he was actually hearing her voice for the first time in seven years.
The eighteen year old nodded slowly, not trusting herself or her alter-self. Who knew when Keladry would regain control over her mind?
"Mithros, it really is you! Where have you been the last seven years? You've had everyone worried to death!"
Kel was surprised and happy to hear that Neal was more concerned about her overall well being, instead of bring up the fact that he just caught her not only murdering a fellow knight, but also in the act of treason. Before she could savor these feelings, Kel could feel Keladry pressing against her mental defenses harder than ever before. White hot daggers were stabbing her brain repeatedly, but Kel held out against the attack. She must not let her take control again- for Neal and the kingdom's sake.
Plus, Kel had to carry out her plan- the plan that she became set on once Keladry trapped her in her own mind. She didn't like her plan- it wasn't too honorable in her own eyes- but she knew she couldn't bear to return to that prison ever again and witness Keladry murder more innocent people.
"Neal, I can't explain. It's too complicated," Kel said through gritted teeth, regretting that she had to be short with the knight. In a perfect world, she would tell him the whole story- Kel owed Neal that much after all- but unfortunately Kel of Mindelan's world was far from perfect. "If you value our friendship, you'll do what I'm about to tell you."
"I'll do anything Kel," her once best friend promised quickly.
Keladry shrieked in defiance, already aware of what Kel was about to request from the knight.
"Neal, I need you to kill me,"
"What?"
The man was clearly not expecting those words to come out of the eighteen year olds' mouth. He seemed to be in a state of shock and stared back at her with horror in his green eyes.
"It's for the best Neal. Please," the eighteen year old begged on behalf of her plan. "As long as I'm alive, Keladry is too and I can't allow her to shed anymore blood. I won't. There are too many lives at stake."
"But what about your own life?" Neal cried, ignoring the fact the she sounded totally insane. "Isn't it important to you? Because it's important to a lot of other people, including me!"
"Neal, don't you see?" Kel's voice was strained with frustration. "I'm a murderer. Why else would I turn up tonight? I was the one who killed Joren and Wyldon. I was the one who threatened the king's life. It was me!"
"Kel, you would never murder anyone in cold blood," the knight persisted. His faith in her was touching and a testament to their deep friendship, but it was also dangerous. Keladry could break free at any moment… "You're one of the most morally conscious people I've ever met."
"I might be, but Keladry isn't," Kel told him.
Neal blinked at her, confusion written across his face. He then inquired,
"Who's Keladry?"
The eighteen year old knew she would never have another chance to tell him.
"Keladry and I are the same person, but we're different at the same time," Kel attempted to explain, feeling sweat roll down her forehead. Keladry unrelenting screams inside her head were beginning to break her concentration. "This is going to sound completely mental, but she's a voice inside my head. An evil voice," the eighteen year old added in clarification, "She forced me kill Wyldon and Joren and now she wants the king dead."
For some reason, Neal didn't stare at her as if she was addled and belonged in some kind of institution. He instead asked,
"Why?"
"Because they were a part of the reason I never achieved my knighthood," Kel told him. "She wanted revenge against them," There was a long pause. The knight seemed to actually be pondering her words. The eighteen year old took a deep breath and then added, "I know this situation seems ridiculous Neal, but I swear to all of the gods above that it's the truth. You have to believe me."
Neal surveyed her, relatively calmly for a person who just learned that their best friend was not only a killer, but also mentally insane. Kel wished more than anything that at that moment that she was a mind reader. She was dying to know what Neal could possibly be thinking about her.
"I believe you," the knight whispered, breaking the silence.
Kel couldn't stop herself,
"You do?"
"Yes, I know it's crazy and so are you, but Kel I also know you very well and I know you aren't a murderer," Neal told her. "Keladry killed Joren and Wyldon. You're innocent."
"Are you sure you're not the crazy one?" Kel joked, her voice laced with relief, and her old friend actually managed to smile.
She was absolutely amazed about how well he was taking this. Any sane person would have killed her by now, but Neal's hand hadn't once even drifted towards his sword's hilt. The knight was almost completely relaxed in her presence.
"Well, I consider myself sane, though my family and friends probably share in your sentiments," Neal returned her banter. It was like old times, as if she was never forced out of page training in the first place.
Unfortunately, Keladry had to ruin the moment by reminding Kel of her presence. It now felt like claws were raking repeatedly against her brain. Her mental defenses against the voice held steady, but the eighteen year old had to bite down on her tongue to stop herself from crying out in agony.
"Neal," Kel's voice regained its firmness to remind her friend of the severity of their situation and she repeated her earlier request, "you have to kill me. Please,"
Neal glared at her, clearly appalled.
"I am not killing my best friend!"
"Your best friend would rather die now, then be hung up on executioners hill for murdering the king of Tortall," Kel shot back. She was angry at his stubbornness, but at the same time she tried to make the knight hear the desperateness in her voice. "Please, you'll be a hero. Do it for Tortall!"
Neal shook his head doggedly.
"I don't need to be a hero,"
"Do it for me then," Kel pleaded in a whisper. "I'm begging you. Keladry has kept me locked away for so long in my mind. It's like a prison Neal. I can't stand it anymore and even if I somehow do get away with murdering the king and escape the authorities, she'll regain control and I'll end up rot in the darkness of my own mind until my heart stops beating. I'm as good as dead either way."
The knight ran his hands through his light brown hair and started pacing.
"This is insane. I can't do it,"
"Neal, you have to do it."
"You're my best friend Kel!" the knight cried.
"You're mine too Neal," the eighteen year old reminded him serenely. "And I'm asking you as a friend, you have to kill me."
Neal stared at her intensely. Tears were now running down his cheeks and his entire body was shaking, as he reached down towards his scabbard. He grabbed his sword by the hilt and pulled it out. The blade reflected off the light of the torches that burned in the hallway.
Kel swallowed down her fear. She was afraid that her own body was going to betray her because just like Neal, she felt like shaking too. Sure, when Kel had thought up her plan to save herself and the kingdom by ending her own life, she had briefly considered how the Peaceful Realms would be, but death was something the eighteen year old never thought deeply about before, since she was so young. Now that Kel was staring it in the face, she had no clue how she should be reacting.
Before Kel could ponder further, she noticed that her best friend's grip on the blade was faltering. Kel whispered in the calmest voice she could muster,
"Neal, it's okay. I'm okay. Just do it."
Green eyes locked hazel in a moment of tension between the two friends. She could tell Neal was now furious for having this terrible task thrust upon him and she hoped he wasn't going to back down now. She was so close to being rid of Keladry- the murderer that lived inside her head- forever.
"I'm okay," Kel repeated, though she didn't know if she said it to comfort Neal or herself.
"I love you, you do know that right?" the knight asked abruptly. "You're like my sister."
Kel nodded, her throat constricting painfully. Why was he making this so hard?
"I love you too Neal," she told him. A tear broke free of her tight hold and slithered down her face. "I'm going to be thankful for this forever. I can never repay you."
Somehow, her best friend managed to nod. Neal then closed his eyes tightly and took a deep breath. He whispered,
"I'm so sorry Kel,"
The eighteen year old cringed, closed her eyes- she did not want to see her death coming towards her- and thus, was only able to feel it approaching her as the air part around her, before a sword cut into her chest.
Kel let out a gasp in a mixture of surprise and pain. She then staggered backwards from the force of the blow, before her legs gave out and she hit the stone floor. Unfortunately, the eighteen year old didn't die instantly. Blood flowed freely from the gash and some of it bubbled up in her throat, choking her- Neal must have punctured her esophagus. However, besides all of this, she was comforted by the fact that the wound was deep enough that the Black God would be greeting her soon enough.
"Oh gods, oh gods, oh gods," she heard Neal keep repeating. Kel watched as he let go of his sword, as if it was burning hot, and then the knight dropped to the floor in clear anguish. He clutched his hair, as if he wanted to rip it out and then, rocked back and forth on the floor. Neal clearly thought that he had killed her immediately. He wasn't aware that her heart was somehow still beating.
Kel did her best to keep quiet. She didn't want her friend to realize that she was still alive. It would only make him feel guiltier. It was better for Neal to believe that she died without feeling any pain, than knowing that her whole chest currently felt like it was on fire and that she was drowning in a pool of her own blood.
Luckily for her, darkness was clouding around her vision and she knew the end was approaching rapidly.
Keladry was louder in her mind more than ever. The voice was screaming, comprehending the fact that her revenge would never fully be carried out. Luckily, Keladry soon got drowned out by the sounds of her best friend weeping. Neal was still very distressed at her death and even started hitting the floor, as if he was a child throwing a tantrum.
"It's not fair. It's not fair," he was now mumbling repeatedly in between sobs.
He's so brave, Kel thought hazily through the pain. He'll be a great knight one day…
All of the sudden, a very tall and intimidating looking man dressed in a black cloak appeared in her peripheral vision. The eighteen year old watched as he slowly inched towards her. She took a ragged breath and absentmindedly hoped Neal hadn't heard it. This was it. The sweet release of death was coming.
Time seemed to stand still as the Black God bent down to claim her soul. However, Kel wasn't paying attention to that because a thought had run through her head,
Knighthood aside, I guess I did get my chance to protect the kingdom after all. I ended up protecting it from myself.
Her lips curved upwards in a smile at the realization. Before she could relish it however, there was a blinding light, releasing her from her inner darkness that Keladry had imprisoned her in, and then she saw no more.
A little dark? Yeah, I'm well aware. I hoped you guys enjoyed it and for anyone who is interested, I have recently re-done my one-shot "Over My Head". It no longer sounds like a ten year old wrote it. Yay. But yes, you must tell me what you think. Hate it? Love it? Let me know.