Author's Note: HOLY FUCKING SHIT FIRST AU EVER!!

Yullen Week's Dec 23rd theme: Steam. Happy Yullen Week~!

Dislaimer:….nah

"Steam Heat"

It was late December 1954 and Kanda knew that this was a bad idea ever since his cousin Lenalee opened her mouth earlier that morning. He knew that he couldn't resist doing anything that she asked him for, so he grudgingly listened as she rambled on about him, the Yu Kanda, spending the day with possibly one of the people he hated the most, Allen Walker. The Chinese girl pouted, insisting that it was Allen's birthday soon, so even he should do something nice. Since it was predicted to snow a lot later in the evening, Lenalee "merely" asked him to take the younger boy out for dinner and then give him a ride home after school.

The Japanese man stared irritably between his car and the girl, predicting that his car would break down in the cold weather, and secretly wishing that it would just spontaneously combust within the next 15 seconds. Lenalee stared at the man curiously as he glared daggers at his beat-to-shit 1946 Ford Station Wagon.

"C'mon, Kanda," Lenalee begged, "Just get him something nice at Jerry's and take him home!"

"You act like the kid's a fucking charity case," Kanda muttered back.

"You know as well as I do that he's not," the girl folded her arms over her chest, then continuing her speech when she saw that Kanda was about to open his mouth again, "And, NO, he's not a freak, either. He's our friend."

"Che. Kid's worth less than Truman himself."

"Stop badmouthing everyone, Kanda," Lenalee huffed, smoothing out her skirt and fitted jacket, which was a very outdated 1947 look, and seemed very out of place with her ponytail. Kanda could care less though.

Lenalee spotted someone behind the grumpy teen and waved, "Allen, great timing! You're both all ready to go!"

Kanda looked at the sheepish boy before grumbling a few profanities under his breath and dug into his cardigan's pocket to retrieve his keys.

Kanda twitched visibly. Physically he had gotten through dinner at Jerry's, but his wallet did not. The man absolutely dreaded the white-haired boy's appetite, and decided that the only way he was going to conserve money was if he himself ate nothing at all that night.

He watched as Allen silently turned up the heat in the car, but quickly turned his eyes back to the road, straining his eyes to see through the rapidly falling snow.

Angered by his visibility issues, he cursed, hitting the steering wheel a few times with his fist, "Why the fuck do you have to live 30 minutes away?!"

"Uhm…" Allen looked taken aback from the outburst, "This isn't my idea of fun either."

What seemed forever later, but in reality was only five minutes, Kanda heard a loud pop coming from the hood and the car stopped altogether.

"What the hell!" Kanda angrily kicked his door open, opening the hood in time for a bunch of smoke to come wafting into his face. He touched the engine, and found at it was frozen.

Allen studied the man's withering composure as he climbed back into the car, slamming the door. The young boy turned up the heat some more, seeing as that was still working. Kanda growled, rubbing the steam that was accumulating on his windshield from the warm air in the car and the cold wind and snow outside.

"I hate you," Kanda drawled out menacingly, collapsing onto his two hands that firmly gripped the wheel.

Allen shrugged and turned on the radio.

I've got…fshhhhhhh, steam heat

Allen laughed and nudged the older man a bit on the shoulder, "It's that song that came out not too long ago. Patti Page?"

"How fucking ironic," Kanda said sarcastically, returning Allen's small shove with a punch.

Allen grinned toothily, "But I need your love to keep away the cold."

Kanda deadpanned, his expression blank, "Oh, NO, you are not starting any shit in my car like that."

"But I can't get warm without your hand to hold." Allen grabbed his hand playfully. Kanda snarled loudly, yanking his hand back.

Allen leaned closed then, "The radiator's hissin, still I need your kissin, to keep me from freezin each night."

"I WILL let you freeze to death out here," Kanda warned, trying to inch himself away from the boy closing in on him.

"…but nothing I've got will take the place of you holding me tight," Allen went in for the kill, flinging his arms around Kanda. Upon impact, Kanda jumped, kneeing his offender in the stomach.

While Allen recovered, Kanda wiped some more steam off from the windshield, "Learn your place, bastard."

However, Allen recovered just in time to expressively sing the end bit of the jazzy chorus, "They told me to pour some more oil in the burner…"

Kanda tried to start the car again while cursing Allen out, "Up your ass with a piece of glass!"

Allen raised a fine eyebrow and paused for a second before jumping back into the song dramatically, trying his best to wiggle his way onto Kanda's lap, "Coal in the boiler? No good. Oil in the burner? No good."

Allen ran a finger down Kanda's chest suggestively, "Cold? N—"

"No!" Kanda barked, which fit the song.

"Hot?"

"YES!" Kanda bellowed, but then realized what he said, face turning slightly red.

"Did you just indirectly call me hot, Kanda?" Allen giggled from his place in the raven-haired man's lap.

"Fuck you."

"You just did. Didn't you?" Allen cooed.

"You're like a pot calling a kettle black. It's like you're flirting with me. It's disgusting," Kanda snapped.

"Then why haven't you pushed me off your lap?" Allen wiggled his but, letting Kanda's crotch know full well the small, squishy weight that was still there.

The only response was a low rumble from Kanda, indicating that he was too pissed off to even form words.

"Let's get this show on the road then, shall we?" Allen recommended, punching the key so that it jammed tighter into the key hole, and turning it to start the car.

Author's Note: Silly Allen…lmfao. I had to sing that song once. Not fun.