I am seventeen, SEVENTEEN how in the hell could this be happening to me, of all people.

Plain, little old me.

Isabella Marie Swan.

How…. There just too much to wrap my mind around. I would need to tell my parents but I sure as hell could never tell Edward. This would make him feel trapped, it would make him feel like he needed to love me when really he didn't. I wasn't his type of girl. His type of girl was blonde, tan, skinny but not in the extremes. I had none of that going for me I was brunette, paler than a ghost the only thing was that I was skinny. But even that didn't cut it. I am a klutz constantly making a fool out of myself. To make it worse that I am best friends with one of the most graceful people in the world, Alice. Who just happened to be Edward's sister. Edward didn't deserve any of this and I most of all didn't deserve him.

"Okay, all they had was Clearblue" Alice said while handing me a small brown bag. Inside that small brown bag was a test, a test that is going to determine my future. Not only my future but almost everyone around me.

"Alic-"my voice cracked giving away my desperate attempt to keep my thoughts to myself.

"Bella its going to, fine" she soothed "I will always be here for you, no matter what the stick says"

She stuck her key into the ignition and we slowly made are way out of the parking lot back to her house.

"You sure he's not going to be there?" I questioned

"Yeah, he's gone out with some friends… Bella he's really upset that you're not talking to him." Guilt washed over me. How could I be doing this to him, how could I be causing him so much pain.

"It's for the best, he can't know." I murmured turning my face to gaze out the window. It was fall out, my favourtie season; the weather though was less than desirable. It was raining, as usual. But all the trees were such beautiful shades of oranges and red that I totally became consumed in thought.

I slowly let the events of that night run through my head

*******

Flashback

"Edward" I sobbed "She just so cruel, she hates me!!"

"Bella, who cares what Tanya thinks, it doesn't matter, I'm here" he said while running his fingers through my hair.

"I know you here, I… I" I love you. I wanted to say that so badly. But he would never love me back he was popular, and I wasn't. He was extremely good looking, I was plain. "I really appreciate it" I smile at him.

Edward and I weren't the closest of friends…. at school, but at home it was a whole different story. I constantly would go over to Alice's house even when she wasn't home just to talk to him. He understood me more than most other people ever do. And I understood him.

He hugged me closer to his heart.

"Bella never let her make you feel worthless, you are anything but ordinary. Without you I probably wouldn't be here. You pulled me through some of the hardest points in my life" he gushed. "Life would be pointless without you."

I stared at him amazed, did he really just say that to me? Before I could think my lips were on his. He kissed me back with intensity. Maybe he really did love me. NO BELLA. He's your friend. But do friends hold friends they way he is holding me?

My hands caressed over his chest when I found myself unbuttoning his shirt. He didn't protest he just kissed me with more passion.

End

BELLA STOP. I was screaming at myself. How could I let those thoughts invade my head. I promised myself that I would never think of him like that ever again. But I constantly found myself thinking about it, imagining other outcomes. Thing were extremely awkward between us now. All because of stupid me, why did I have to start kissing him? He probably thought I was a weird freak. But would things have gotten as far as they did it he had thought that?

"Bella?" Alice looked a little worried. I hadn't realized that we had already made it to her house.

"Oh… were here? Already… that was fast." I breathed.

"The car ride was half and hour… are you sure your ok. Maybe we should get my dad to check you out." She mumbled while giving me a once over with her eyes.

"Alice I'm ffff-innee" I stuttered

Alice got out of the car and went to unlock her front door. Her house was beautiful, the sheer size of it had always amazed me, ever since Alice and I had become friends in 8th grade she would constantly bring me over to her house and ever time I saw it still to this very day, it took my breathe away.

Alice stalked up her stairs while I stumbled along behind, on the way to her room we past Edward's room were my entire dilemma started.

When I finally made it into her room Alice was already on her bed reading the instructions of the pregnancy test.

"Alice… what if it's positive?" I bit down on my lower lip.

"Bella just go take it already and then we will go from there." She replied a little harshly.

I stalked off into her huge bathroom.

*****

"Alice how much more time?" I paced impatience

"Thirty more seconds, Bella breathe everything is fine." She instructed.

In. Out. In. Out. In. Out.

"Okay you can look now." She said.

"No you look for me…" I closed my eyes as I saw her reach for the stick.

I heard her inhale.

"Positive" I opened my eyes to see her beaming. Why the heck is she smiling like a fool this is going to ruin my life.

I went to stand up but instead of raising the floor came closer and closer to my face until everything went black.

I'm screwed.