Title: Let a Little Love in Your Heart
Author: AnnieVH
Summary: Barney has a plan for this Valentine's Day.
Rating: G
Genre: humor, romance-ish, flashfic
Characters or Pairing: Robin, Barney, Ted, Ted/Robin
Prompts:
from vakair_dar : Barney, and the odd phrase of "Let a little love in your heart".
Warning: non-Robin/Barney.
Spoilers: I'd say... season two, but no major spoilers really.
Disclaimer: don't own, just borrow.
Notes: written for an LJ FicBattle.
Barney threw himself on a chair by Ted's side. "So, here's the plan."
"Wh-?!" Ted stared at him, in shock. "What are you doing here?!"
"I'll get on stage and sing. When you hear one of the girls sighing how sensitive I sound, you'll sign her to me by asking her the time."
"Barney, it's Valentine's Day!"
"Exactly! Look for the girls who just got dumped. Hot, with a little desperation in their eyes, probably eating a big chocolate cake and drinking vodka."
"I'm on a date, Barney! I can't help you-"
"So, listen, I liked the song, but I don't know if it's cheesy enough. You're the expert, what do you think?"
"What is this?"
Barney turned and smiled. "Robin! Just in time! Listen, if you just got dumped on Valentine's Day and you were already drunk, would you sleep with a guy who sang this song randomly? Would you think it was meant for you?"
"What are you talking about?"
Ted passed her the song as she took her place at the table. "Barney wants to do a little kareoke to pick up women."
"That is not kareoke, Ted. That's an Original Stinson."
"Like the rainbow fiasco?"
"I'm turning the page, Ted. Rainbows are in the past. The future is-wait for it- Let a Little Love in Your Heart."
"Let a little love in your heart?"
"Let a Little Love in Your Heart. I've put together every cheesy clichè plus everything a woman would like to hear on Valentaine's Day."
"'Cause nothing gets me out of my pants faster than 'let me hold you through your PMS'." Read Robin.
"Exactly!! Okay, so, Ted, I'd rather you focused on that table over there - any of those three would be fine, but I liked the blonde better."
"Baby, baby, I'm talking babies."
"Barney, we're a little busy here."
"Lets make love because I'm done with sex. I'm much better than your ex."
"Right. So, you gotta touch her shoulder and ask the time. Remember, touch the shoulder - ask the time. That's our sign."
"I'm ready for commitment, yeah baby, that's what I meant."
"I can't be your wingman tonight, Barney! I'm on a date!"
"I want somebody to cuddle with tonight. I want somebody to make it alright."
"Theodore Juliet Mosby!"
"That's not my middle name." And to Robin, "It is not my middle name!"
"I can't be your wingman is not something a wingman can say!"
"Lets call the wedding band, lets bond, lets reproduce. Lets buy a house, lets buy some juice..."
Barney started to sing "... just let a little love in your heart, oh girl, awww girl, just let me love you aaaall night long, oh baby, baby, be my baby tonight and let a little love in my heart. You like it?"
"I'll just say that, if I were drunk enough to enjoy this song, I'd probably be drunk enough to sleep with you."
"Excellent! Okay, kids!" He got up. "Showtime!!"
As he left, Ted whispered to Robin. "Lets get out of here when the lights are out."
"Kidding me? Dinner and a show."
Ted's chin dropped. "You're kidding me."
"I'm just sorry we didn't order tomatoes."
"Hello everybody." Said Barney, tears filling his eyes. "This next song was meant for a very speacial girl, but she just dumped me-" he chocke.
On another table, Ted heard a blonde girl sigh.