An AU of sorts on Brooke's eating disorder storyline… What if her father, Mike, hadn't caught her when he did? This fanfic takes place after Harrison John and Brooke McQueen's race for Student Council President and Harrison has been admitted to the hospital for treatment of cancer.
I do not own these characters!! They belong to the creators Ryan Murphy and Gina Matthews.
(The first part of the story was taken from episode 2.8, Misery Loathes Company and is in italics. Full credit goes to the writers of the episode- Oliver Goldstick & Deidre Strohm!!)
Brooke is alone with Harrison John in his hospital room.
"Hey… Harrison, look… I feel terrible for how I treated you during the elections, and please believe me, if I had known what you were going through, I would never-"
Harrison cuts in. "Don't apologize, Brooke."
"I want you to know how badly I feel."
"No, you want you know how badly you feel. Please, stop campaigning. Stop trying to pretend that this is about anything else than you convincing yourself that deep down you're really a good person."
Brooke looks slightly hurt by what Harrison just said, but tries to ignore it. "That's not why I'm here."
"Sure, it is. Wow, my God…Please, if you come away from this stupid election with anything, let it be one ounce of self-knowledge. You're the loneliest person I know. Behind that smile there's this desperate person who doesn't think she deserves any happiness so she goes out of her way to control every situation. Well, I've got an update for you, Brooke. You can't control what's happening to me. So, please, save the speech for yourself."
Brooke has had enough. "Clearly, you have no idea who I am." She turns and runs out of the room. She keeps running until she spots a vending machine. Brooke stares at all the options while mentally adding up the calories of each chocolate bar and bag of chips in her head. She rifles through her purse and comes up with five dollars. Shaking, she places the money in the machine and selects her options- two of her favourite chocolate bars. When they fall down, she grabs them quickly and takes off running once again, this time for the nearest exit, not even bothering to take her change.
--later that evening
"Brooke, honey, are you sure you don't want any steak?" Jane asks, concerned.
Brooke shook her head. "No. No, thank you Jane. Nicole and I ate after we went to see Harrison in the hospital."
"Oh, you went to see Harrison? How's he holding up?"
Brooke subtly rolls her eyes. "Oh, he seems to be holding up just fine." Under her breath she growls "He sure has no problem acting like a jerk to people who are supposed to be his friends. Lonely..Ha! He doesn't know me…I'll show him…"
Jane tilts her head. "What was all that?"
Brooke's cheeks turn a shade of rose. "Nothing, nothing. Harrison seems to be doing fine."
Mike comes around the corner and sits down at the table. "Apparently Sam's been held up somewhere… It looks like it's just the three of us! Are you sure you don't want anything to eat?"
Brooke shook her head once again. "Water's fine. I'll sit and keep you company." As she sips on the water in her glass, she feels overcome to take a big scoop of the mashed potatoes sitting in front of her. No, she reminds herself, you binged on the chocolate bars earlier. But you also purged them afterwards another voice commented. It would be alright to have some food now. Brooke closes her eyes.
"Brooke, are you alright?"
Mike's voice breaks the silence in Brooke's head and her eyes snap open. "Huh? Oh, sure. I'm alright. It's just a tension headache. All the stress of the elections is really taking its toll, plus with Harrison being sick, Sam running from Homecoming Queen...It's all a little overwhelming. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to take some Tylenol and go rest upstairs."
"Oh, of course, sweetheart. You've been spending so many late nights working on debates or speeches, you deserve some rest." Jane says with a smile.
Brooke returns the smile. "Thanks, Jane. Goodnight!" Brooke then kisses her father and her would-be step-mother on their respected cheeks and heads up the stairs to her bedroom.
--
Standing in front of the mirror in her room in just her matching bra and underwear set, Brooke suddenly feels a wave of disgust rush through her. "I'm so… ugly." She whispers pinching her stomach. "Starting now I will dedicate myself to becoming pure. Nothing but bones…" She feels her collarbones with the fingers on her left hand, bringing her hand down to feel the bones in her chest. "I'll be better. I'll be perfect. Then we'll see who's lonely…"
Brooke then turns away from the mirror, slips off her bra, and puts on a pair of her comfiest pajamas. Without missing a beat, she careful sits down on the carpeted floor and starts doing some simple stretches, and before long, Brooke feels almost completely relaxed. With a yawn she turns to her digital clock to see what the time is. 11:45 the red numbers blink back at her. Time to turn in for the night, she thinks. Tomorrow would be the real challenge.