Father of Her Heart
By Misha
Disclaimer- I don't own Grey's Anatomy or any of the characters, if I did then Meredith would have slept with either Mark or Alex by now. I'm not making any money off of this, so please don't sue.
Author's Notes- This is a Meredith story, focusing on her relationship with Richard. It deals with the fist three seasons, nothing from season four in here. I like the relationship between them, how he seems to care for her much more than Thatcher does and that's what this story is based on. That's all. Enjoy!
Summary- Deep down, he'd been the the one to matter, not her father.
Spoilers- Up to "Didn't We Almost Have It All?"
Rating- PG-13
Meredith barely remembered her father, he left when she was five, or they left him, whichever way you put it the result was the same: Thatcher Grey faded from her life before her fifth birthday.
Not that he'd ever been a huge part of it in the first place. Years later, Meredith could barely remember her father, but there was one male who stood out in her memories--who had filled that precious role for her.
Richard Webber.
From as far back as Meredith can remember, Richard is there. Uncle Richard she called him when she was a little girl. She'd go visit her mother at the hospital, sometimes, and would see Ellis maybe for a minute, but he'd always take time for her.
Richard would take her to the cafeteria for a snack or entertain her while she waited for her mother. Richard made more time for her than Ellis ever did.
Thatcher tried, but he was never more than a ghostly presence in his daughter's life. Meredith's not sure if she cried when her mother told her that her father wasn't coming back, but she remembers how she sobbed when she was told they were moving to Boston, away from Uncle Richard.
He hugged her good-bye and told her he'd always be there for her. At five, she'd been too young to understand adultery and heartbreak, she didn't understand the bitter way her mother laughed when he said that.
All she understood was that she was being taken away from the only person who'd always been there. Even at five, she understood that things were about to change, no matter what he said.
That was her first lesson in change, in loss. In abandonment. Because, five year old Meredith didn't understand why it was happening, all she understood was that it was.
After they left Seattle, Richard faded from her life to an extent, of course. He and Ellis hadn't exactly parted on good terms, but he did his best.
Letters, phone calls, presents at her birthday and Christmas. As time went by, contact became less and less frequent, but he was still a presence.
He never missed a birthday or Christmas, which was more than she could say about her mother at times. Still, their was a definite change in their relationship.
Somehow, even as a child, Meredith knew better than to ask for the impossible. She knew that he wasn't going to be around, not like he used to, though she didn't understand it.
But she started to withdraw. After a while, she stopped asking her mother when they'd get to see him again, stopped calling him, even stopped wishing that he'd come and make life with her mother more bearable.
Because, young as she was, she understood that things had changed and that Uncle Richard was never going to be what he was.
Oh, as an adult Meredith knows he tried and that he did more than most men would--making an effort to stay in contact with his ex-lover's daughter.
She was more sympathetic as she got older, especially when she learnt about what was going on in his life in those years, but at the time it had felt like he had abandoned her just like her father had.
When Meredith entered Med school, Richard had actually written her a letter of recommendation. By that point, he had more or less faded out of her life, at least in any significant role.
Oh, he still sent gifts for holidays--and a nice expensive one for both her graduations. She still saw him once in a while, but that was it.
He was just some on the outside of her life, which was more than she could say for her father, true. Thatcher never once sent so much as a gift or a card, while Richard never forgot.
She figured that meant something.
Of course, by the time she entered Medical school, her mother's health was failing and keeping up a relationship with Richard Webber became harder because Ellis' secret had to be guarded.
Besides, he was a part of her mother's life, not hers. She had her own life now and a lot on her plate and she knew she was the only person she could count on.
If anything, life had taught her that.
Children might be pacified by gifts and the occasional letter, but as an adult she understood it was just trapping, a surface effort and she didn't need it.
She didn't need anyone or anything.
Her Seattle Grace Residency offer came with a personal letter from Chief Richard Webber, Meredith was sure it was the only one of its kind.
Meredith,
I'm so proud of you.
Congratulations on graduating from medical school and welcome to Seattle Grace. I know you're going to be an extraordinary surgeon, just like your mother, and I'm glad for the chance to help nurture you.
We'll have to have dinner once you're in Seattle.
Love,
Richard.
P.S- Give your best to my mother, she's impossible to get a hold of these days, isn't she?
It was just a quick note, but enough to make her smile briefly. Then, the smile turned into a frown.
Medical school had been difficult for her, her famous mother setting her apart and she was sure the same would hold true for her residency and Richard's presence wouldn't make it any easier.
She knew any favouritism, no matter how slight, any affection, would just help breed resentment on the part of her fellow interns and she didn't want that.
She wanted to be accepted, to be one of them. She looked again at the familiar writing and wondering if that was even possible or if she was destined to be set apart from the very beginning.
Meredith sighed, inwardly vowing that somehow she'd convince Richard, no Chief Webber, to treat her like any other intern and she'd forget that she'd ever thought him as anything other than her boss...
Meredith's fears were confirmed.
From the first, Richard treated her different. He seemed to single her out and expect more of her. She also got away with a little more, because of who she was.
Meredith understood it better when she discovered his affair with her mother. She wanted to hate him for it, but she couldn't. Not when she saw his devastation at her mother's death or heard how much he had fought to help save her life.
Especially not when he held her after her father's rejection, after she had bombed her boards.
Oh, she still resented him a bit, but... In that moment she realized that he was everything Thatcher Grey wasn't. That her father had never mattered in the long run, but Richard had.
He'd been the one she'd missed and he was the one who'd never forgotten her. She finally understood that. He wasn't her father, but he was all the father she'd ever needed.
Finally, she was ready to accept that, to let him into her life, to realize that he'd always been there, in her heart. It wouldn't always be easy, there was still anger and regret, but...
Meredith knew it was time to stop blaming him and shielding her heart and to let him love her, like he always had. Her father would never be anything but a stranger, but it didn't anymore, because she had him. The father of her heart.
The End