pirouette
you're tired
of being Molly
aren't you?
he tries to tell you that
you're beautiful
but you don't believe him
do you?
he gives you roses
he teaches you how to wish
on shooting stars
doesn't he?
with Teddy
sometimes you feel like
it's worth it to be Molly
isn't it?
but you're done with the people telling you that
you can't fly
that
he's too old
that
you'll never do anything
because Teddy Lupin has taught you
how to fly
and
how to love
and
that you'll fly high
you want to go to London
to live amongst the stars at night
and take adventures
and be normal
and fly like he tells you that you can
"Is this really what you want?"
he asks you
but you know that he'll go with you
because deep down
he knows that he'll always be yours
and you'll always be his
because you're addicted to him
they used to tell you that it wasn't okay for him
to be with you
and you hid for a while
until your mum talked to you again
and your dad stopped frowning
and your sister started loving you again
but you don't know if you love them
(but you love Teddy, don't you)
(even though you shouldn't)
you dance
to forget
and you dance
to do something with your feet
instead of running away
you slip on your azure ballet shoes
and become Molly
not the other Molly
not 'her'
the muggles love you
so you lose yourself in them
and you dance until you're sore
or you're crying
or both
sometimes the ones you love
can hurt you more with their tongue
than with their fists
and a word that has claws
hurts more
than a week of pirouettes
and so you twirl down the hill
you descend into your world
where it's just you
and Teddy
and your ballet shoes
when you tell your parents
that you're moving to London
(with Teddy)
they just nod
and later, you pretend that you don't hear your family whisper
"Molly was never the perfect child, anyway"
no, you tried
that's what a Hufflepuff does
because of course you weren't in Gryffindor
to be a lion, you have to be brave
and you hide behind the big red curtain
praying for it not to rise
most days, the anxiety kills you
you wake up at three to make sure Teddy is still there
he hasn't left you yet
and he promises he never will
the new house has a basement
that he's turned into a studio for you
and when you're quite sure he's still there
sleeping next to you
you slip down to the dance studio
you turn on the Beethoven
and you pirouette
until you fall down
and then you stay there for a while
until he wakes up
and brings you back to bed
where you pirouette in your dreams
A/N: Written for the Hunger Games Challenge-word, emotion, dialogue, setting, and weapon; Camp Potter: Tech Discovery-write about Teddy Lupin; If You Dare Challenge-spin.
If you'd like to review, I'd appreciate anything. A few words are always loved.
For some reason, I imagine listening to Stars or Javert's Suicide from Les Mis while reading this. The tones are similar to what I had in mind for this.
Allie