Night time has descended onto our camp like an ominous shadow. Clouds cover the twinkling stars, threatening yet another bout of snow. The wind wips through the tents, flapping them in the breeze. And Ceaser is dead. It has not been but 1 hour since he left us to pass on into the other life. Yet already, hell has happened.
I had no idea. Everything just seemed to happen in a whirl of scenes.Bowing before our new Emperor, Commudus, seeing the old, worn body of Aureillus,lying wrapped in soft blankets, and feeling that horrible sense of apparation,like a cold, clammy hand working it's way up your back. I knew. The second I saw that look in Commudus's eyes.He had something planned.
Gazing at him as he conferred with another soldier, he reminded me of a young boy who had just won a game through cheating, and was quite ready to flaunt the loss in the loser's face. He tried to appear saddened by his father, but I saw past all that. This was just a game to him. I wondered where Lucilla was. Was she enjoying her father's death as much as Commudus? Surely not. If only she was next in line. I could atleast relax knowing she would never knowingly lead Rome into trouble. Commudus on the other hand still had much to learn. He could never fully appear to be the confident,intelligent, aristocrat he tried to resemble. Commudus was still a boy and had all the insecurites and fears of one. And that was why he could not take on his father's role. Atleast, not yet.
But what could I do? When you do not have the say and power to make a difference, it's best to just to keep your mouth shut and go with the flow. Especially if you value your neck!
So there I was. Pretending to agree with all my new Emperor was telling me. Most of it seemed fair at first, and I was just beginning to actually believe that he might not be too terrible........but that was when he decided to ,speaking figureatively, drop the sword on me.
His eyes had turned cold and distant. He looked as though someone had just said he was a little boy to his face, and was ready for revenge. Trying to maintain a confident outward appearance, he began telling me of Maximus. How he wanted nothing more then to forget the man existed. To be considerate and to appear fair to his people,he told me how he would offer his hand, once and only once. If he did not comply, then Maximus and his family included would no longer be residents of the Roman Empire......no.....they would be of the next life.
I felt as though someone had punched me right in the gut.
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