"You Captain Jack fucking Harkness are the most ignorant, egotistical, nihilistic arse on this bloody planet!" Gwen spat articulating every word, fire burned in her eyes.
"Shows just how few people you know, sweetheart." Jack seemed unaware of just how furious the young Welshwoman was.
"Jack." Owen cautioned he'd seen this happen before Gwen was scary when she got like this. Tosh continued working at her desk and Ianto fiddled with the coffee machine, they both appeared to not hear the very heated conversation.
"Don't sweetheart me you arsehole! Do you know how embarrassing that was?" The brunettes face was red she seemed to only be just controlling her actions.
"Gwen, it was Andy's birthday party, it's not as if it's important." The Captain wasn't even looking at her, clearly the readings on one of Tosh's many computer screens were far too important.
"How dare you! Andy is the most caring, kind..."
"Wet fish in the whole of the universe, I mean could the guy get any duller?" Jack's voice remained even and calm against Gwen's shrieks.
"Jack!" She stormed up the steps to Tosh's work station.
"Do. Not. Touch. Anything." Tosh warned Gwen under her breath, obviously frustrated with how close the argument was to her.
"What Gwen it's true! I mean why did I have to go?" The Captain exclaimed he was now beginning to feel anger bubble inside him too.
"To show that my old and new colleagues can socialise together without any angst. Obviously that didn't work out, considering you punched him!" Gwen pushed Jack, who rather comically lost his balance and fell over on the metal walkway. With a flick of his leg, she'd been knocked down too she tried to keep her balance, which resulted in her pulling Tosh's coffee cup onto the floor as well.
"I give up, Owen call me when they're done." Tosh through her hands into the air and audibly sighed, before grabbing her coat and P.D.A to find somewhere more peaceful to work.
"Will do." Owen said evacuating to his medical area, if they came down there he would not think twice about stabbing them with a scalpel.
"You can tidy that up, Gwen." Ianto called, from his coffee area, shaking his head in annoyance.
"Twat!" Gwen muttered, as they both climbed to their feet.
"He called me, insolent, and said how revolting my flirting was. My flirting is not revolting, it's very effective thank you very much." Jack pouted like the spoilt child Gwen thought he was.
"You are insolent. Do you know how hard I worked to convince Andy you should come because Rhys was away, and then you go fuck it up!" Gwen turned away from him and bent down to pick up pieces of broken cup, to indicate the conversation was closed.
"She's got a point." Ianto added from the safety of a few metres away.
"No she doesn't." Jack snapped, as he turned around. "She never has a point. It's just meaningless shouting!" Jack hated when the others got involved they always ganged up on him it was the one thing he hated about having a team.
"You promised you'd behave." The tea boy stated, as if that settled the whole argument. Gwen bit her lip wanting to say something but knowing it probably wasn't the best thing to do.
"I did behave, he didn't." He raised an eyebrow daring them to contradict.
"Oh please Jack, just admit you did something wrong." Gwen mumbled under her breath.
"If you've got something to say, darling then just say it." He turned back to Gwen, trying not to get preoccupied by staring at her arse. She took this as an invitation, stood up and faced him. She hated that he towered over her, and had to resist the urge to stand on tiptoes.
"Just admit you did something wrong, and the conversations closed." Gwen looked at him waiting for him to apologise, knowing there was only about a 1 in a million chance of it happening.
"I didn't do anything wrong." Jack stood his ground per usual. They both knew where their last argument concluded, it was probably what he was hoping for. Gwen slapped him leaving a very satisfying handprint on his cheek. Instinctively he raised his hand to retaliate.
"Go on then, Jack." She dared him to cross the line.
"Bitch." He swore as he stormed up the steps and into his office.
"Can't handle that you're going to lose an argument yet again Jack?" She goaded.
"Ianto ice." He demanded, before slamming his office door behind him. Owen walked back into the main hub area, taking the door as the signal the argument had finished, for now.
"Bloody children." He rolled his eyes at Ianto as he strolled through the hub door, and out into the street, to tell Tosh that it was safe to return now. Gwen stood looking around her not knowing what to do now, still shaking with fury.
"Gwen cup," Ianto looked down at the remaining shards.
"I know." She bent over again, picking the largest chunks up and placing them in her left hand. Meanwhile, jack watched her from his office window.
"She may have won the battle, but I'm gonna win the war." He muttered to himself. He let out a sigh bloody hell his cheek smarted, where was that ice?