Beneath Closed Eyes
By: The Demise of the Fallen Angel
Summary: Pain. Anguish. Self-hatred. Fuji has to put on a smiling mask to hide from his past. He had to hide his guilt and agony for he abandoned a very special person a long time ago…
I hope you'd like my first try on writing a fanfic! So, here goes…
Disclaimer: Yes, I wish I owned Prince of Tennis. Unfortunately, I don't.
Chapter I
"Fujiko, why do you always close your eyes?"
Trust Eiji to come up with a question so unrelated to their current topic. The two of them was in an ice cream parlor, talking about the results of the ranking matches. It was unfortunate that Inui had lost his regular position, but the talented freshman despite his arrogance was a great addition to the team.
"Fujiko! Can you stop spacing out and just answer my question?" Eiji put on his cutest pout, hoping that Fuji would answer the question that boggled his mind since their first meeting.
"Saa, I wonder too." was all that Fuji replied before focusing his attention on licking off the wasabi flavored ice cream.
-o0o-
"Syusuke! H-help me!"
A bloodied hand reached for his own trembling ones.
"I- I don't want t-to die yet. P-please help m-me."
The voice faltered. Shallow breaths came from the limp body. All energy was robbed off from the frail frame. Blood was pooling around the body.
"S-Syusuke! Please save m-me."
A small, cold hand was clutching his hand tightly as if it was a lifeline.
"Hey, where did those brats go?"
"They can't be that far away. One of them was shot."
His breath hitched as he heard the voices. It was the same voices as their captors.
Fuji felt his whole body tremble in fear. His cheek stung on the part where one of their captors hit him for trying to escape.
"Syusuke!"
The cold hand tightened its grip. He looked at the bloody mess surrounding the body. He's quite sure that even if they were to escape from here, the gunshot was too deep and the lost blood was too much, the body won't survive.
"P-please, Syusuke. Save me!"
Tightening his resolve, he clutched the small hand and brought it to his lips. He then leaned down to kiss the bloody forehead, careful not to press on the knife wound.
Blood smeared on his lips. It was salty and it made him a bit nauseous.
His tears kept on flowing out of his eyes.
"Gomenasai!"
It was all he said before he stood up and ran for his life.
"Syusuke!"
The voice rang with desperation and betrayal.
Rapid footsteps of their captors were heard, heading towards their direction.
"Syusuke! Syusuke!"
The voice kept on shouting his name.
"Syu-"
Tears flooded his vision as he ran and ran for safety.
"Gomenasai, Kazuki. Please forgive me."
Fuji whispered as he continued to run away.
"SYUSUKEEE!!!!!"
BANG!
A loud scream, a gunshot and there was silence.
-o0o-
Fuji's body shot up. Sweat trickled down his face.
"Syusuke, did you dream of that again?"
He barely heard Yumiko-neesan's voice. The voice screaming his name was still ringing in his ears.
He looked up to see his sister hovering above him. Concern was written all over her beautiful face.
He accepted the glass of water his sister handed and drank.
"I'm fine now, neesan. You don't have to worry anymore."
"Don't worry?!", Her voice rose an octave higher, "How can I not worry? You had been dreaming that same dream for 5 years! Can't you let go of the past, Syusuke?"
His gripped his blanket tighter, but he kept his calm, smiling face.
"I'm fine, neesan."
She sighed in defeat, knowing that his younger brother won't admit his true feelings to anyone.
"Fine, but you have to go back to sleep."
He nodded in agreement to indulge his sister.
She closed the door behind her and he could hear her footsteps slowly fading.
He sighed and slumped on the soft bed once again.
He touched his lips. He could still taste the salty blood that smeared on his lips. It was her blood.
Memories of that night 5 years ago flashed before his eyes clearly and vividly, as if it happened only yesterday.
Fuji closed his eyes to stop himself from crying, but still, tears found their way out of his eyes and they flowed abundantly on his pale cheeks.
He remembered the pale body, slowly draining out of blood. The bloody hand that reached out to clutch his own. The voice that screamed his name over and over again. The gunshot.
Pain surged through his heart. Memories of that night were too painful and his heart was aching, it's as if it was bounded by shackles, as if it was clenched in a vice-like grip.
He couldn't forgive himself for abandoning her, his best friend. Maybe if he didn't leave her, if he just stayed by her side, if only he was strong enough to fight his fear, if only he wasn't such a coward who ran away, maybe, just maybe he could save her. Maybe he could prevent her from dying.
He covered his face with the pillow to muffle the sobs that escaped his lips.
Once again, he remembered the pale body, slowly draining out of blood. The bloody hand that reached out to clutch his own. The voice that screamed his name over and over again. The gunshot.
He kept on playing those memories on his mind, like a lullaby to drift him off to sleep and pain once again conquered his body. Tears kept on flowing from his eyes as he slowly drifted off to unconsciousness.
Maybe he's much of a masochist as he is a sadist.
-o0o-
"Fuji!" Oishi's frantic voice welcomed him as he entered the clubroom. It was before morning practice and only regulars occupied the room. Morning practice for regulars starts earlier than the other club members.
He smiled at the vice-captain. "What is it, Oishi?"
"Fuji, have you been crying?" Oishi asked him, worried about his welfare. "Your eyes are red and puffed."
The question piqued the interest of the other regulars. They all looked at him worriedly.
"No, I haven't."
Tezuka, being the captain stepped forward. "Fuji, you're paler than usual. Are you okay?"
Before he could retort with a 'Oh, but I'm really pale.", Momoshiro interrupted him.
"Fuji-senpai, I know you're naturally pale, but buchou was right, you're paler than usual."
"Did you eat breakfast, Fuji?" Inui inquired.
"Yes, Yumiko-neesan's wasabi sushi was as delicious as ever."
"Did you have enough sleep?" Kawamura asked.
"Yes, the bed was as comfortable as ever."
"Are you sick?" Eiji reached out to touch Fuji's forehead to check his temperature.
"No, I don't think so."
"You're temperature seems normal. Are you feeling anything bad? Nausea, pai-"
"Eiji, I'm fine." He smiled at his friend then turned towards the other regulars. "Really, I'm fine."
"If that's what you say." Tezuka said and picked up his racket before leaving to start his usual warm-ups.
Fuji looked around and saw someone missing.
"It seems like our new regular is late. I hope he won't make this a habit." He said as he put on his regular uniform.
"Mou, ochibi is late! He should be here or Tezuka's gonna make him run death laps!" Eiji said as he twirled his racket on his hand.
"Hmm… I'm sure he will enjoy building his stamina with Tezuka's laps, ne Eiji?" He smiled at his friend who stepped back a little upon seeing his smile.
"Fujiko, you look creepy with that smile."
Momo, Kaidoh and Kawamura hurriedly left to start their own warm-ups.
"Oi, Echizen! You shouldn't make tardiness a habit."
"Saa, it seems that he's here." He said as he heard Momo's loud voice greet the freshman.
"Ochibiiii!" Eiji ran to greet his favorite kouhai, glomping the little boy in the process. Oishi trailed behind his doubles partner.
Fuji pulled his jersey's zipper up. Its early spring, so the weather is still a bit cold.
"Blame this idiot neesan who woke up late!" Echizen scoffed at his sister who was running right behind him.
"Oi! Don't call your sister idiot, brat!" A girl's voice was heard then a thump. The girl apparently hit Echizen's head with her own tennis bag.
"Idiot neesan." Echizen mumbled earning him another smack on the head as his older sister glared at him.
"Echizen, you shouldn't treat your sister like that." Kawamura gently said.
Fuji chuckled as he heard the voices outside. It seems that the cocky, arrogant freshman brat likes to tease his sister.
He pulled one of his rackets from his bag.
He grabbed the door handle and opened it.
CLACK!
He dropped his racket.
What greeted him was probably the biggest shock of his life.
Startling azure eyes were wide open with shock.
His throat ran dry.
His hands were getting clammy.
His stomach tightened.
His whole body trembled.
"K-Kazuki?" He whispered in a soft almost breathless voice.
The girl bickering with Echizen stopped and turned her head towards him.
THUD!
She dropped her tennis bag.
"Syu-Syusuke?"
She managed to whisper before she fainted.
Fujiko - Eiji's endearing way of calling Fuji
Gomenasai - I'm sorry.
neesan - An honorific used to regard an older sister.
senpai - This refers to upperclassmen. The opposite of this is kouhai, which is what an upperclassman would call an underclassman. Example, a freshman would call a senior senpai, while the senior would call the freshman kouhai.
buchou - captain
Ochibi - Eiji's nickname for Ryoma.
So, how was it?
Please tell me if I made Fuji OOC or if I wrote something to your displeasure. I'm hoping I could finish the second chapter soon. But I need something to stir up my drive so…
Reviews are mostly welcomed. Constructive criticism would be very helpful and flames are also accepted.