A little Bodily Pain won't hurt (much)

Disclaimer: It's simple. I don't own GS/D or Sunrise. Now go and bother someone else. (Smiles)

A/n: Hey, Hey, I'm back with a one-shot of Cagalli and Kira's B-day's present. Hope you like it. It's a little dumb with a jest, but this is just a one-shot, so I don't really have to worry about. Anyways, Review and Enjoy!

So, Take a sit, Dear Readers, The jest is just about to begin. (Laughs madly.)

Italics are the guys and normal is the girls. Bold is just emphasis.

Location: School, backyard… Period: Lunch time…

"Hey girls, so, what are you going to do this weekend?" a blond asked coming up to her friends, who were sitting on the grass, at school. They were waiting for the boys to join them. They were always late.

"I'm going nowhere. Dearka is busy with the guys this weekend." The brunette replied with a smile, taking a sip from her diet Pepsi.

"Oh, hmm… I think I'm going to the mall and get my ears pierce—" a pink haired girl replied simply and calmly, shocking both of her friends.

"WHhhaaaattT!?"

"Hey Dearka, where were you?" a frustrated brunette asked the tanned guy, who was running towards him and Athrun. His was sweating like a pig. "Ah, sorry. I was stuck in PE class."

"No wonder…you stink…" Kira mumbled, pinching his nose.

"Hey! I heard that!"

"What? You do…" Kira mumbled, trying to hold back his laughter.

"…Oh, man, the girls are going to be angry, again…" "Specially Cagalli…" The blue haired guy said shaking his head. He knows how angry his girlfriend could be.

"Sheez, fine, let's hurry before the Big Scary Blond tiger eats us." Dearka laughed. Later getting jabbed by Athrun.

Together the trio, they walked to the cool shady grass area where they usually had lunch with the girls.

"I bet they are pissed." Kira said.

"Oh don't worry. Besides, they are girls. What else would girls do while they are waiting for us, men—?" Dearka said with a grin.

They got near until they heard something been said out loud. It sounded like the girls were talking about something secretive.

"Hey!" Athrun and Kira exclaimed, as Dearka was dragging them down to the grass ground. There was a bush near by, which they hid there. "Hush! They are talking about something secretive."

"So!? They are going to kill us if we don't show up!" Kira exclaimed and swiftly a hand was placed over his mouth. "Phmph!"

"Shhh…listen…" Dearka silently whispered.

If Athrun and Kira wanted out, they would have to listen to the Joker, Dearka. They both sighed and slowly the placed their ears on the green hedge plant, they could hear clear voices of the girls. They were just on the other side.

"…Hmm…yah…what's wrong?" she asked, looking at them hesitantly.

"Lacus, what's with— aren't you the one against crucial body pain?" The blond asked, looking at her friend like she was an alien.

"Uh, I was…but I want to…for Kira."

"Wait. What does she mean?" Kira asked, his pulse panicking. He looked at Dearka.

"…Crucial body pain? …For Kira? …Oh, boy, I think I know!" Dearka laughed silently, poking Kira on the ribs. "Your girl is getting ready for you!" Kira flushed tomato red.

"Dearka, are you sure?" Athrun asked doubtfully. "OH, buddy, I'm sure." The tanned guy replied with a smug grin. "Lacus really sounds like she's—" "Oh, grow up Dearka! And stop making up stuff with your perverted brain of yours!" Kira said.

The brunette sighed. If what Dearka said is true, then he never knew Lacus was like this. They haven't even gone dirtify mode, like his sister and his so-called-best-friend Athrun Zala. He knew that they did a little more than kissing. He heard them moaning each other's name one time when he was passing Cagalli's room. But what they did was beyond Kira's kid imagination. And he didn't want to know, at all. And he wasn't yet ready to take Lacus. She's too pure and innocent. He couldn't do it, even if she asked. Kira shivered with the imagination.

"It's a weird thing you would do for my brother, Lacus. It will hurt, girl." The blond said taking a sip of her soda.

"Not what I heard. My cousin, Mia, she said it doesn't… wait… when you guys got it, did ithurt a lot?"

"Ehh?" The guy's mouth dropped at the last words. "That's a little too private, right?" Athrun asked with a flushed face.

"Hm… I don't remember how much it hurt when I got it, I was very little then." Cagalli replied.

Little, huh?

"ATHRUN!" Kira said in rage and shook his blue haired friend senseless before he could even react to his girlfriend's respond. "What did you do to my little baby sister!? Did you actually touch her, when you first met her, in elementary!? Tell me, you—" "I did nothing of that sort!" Athrun replied trying to dodge Kira's fist. "Seriously!"

While the two were dodging and killing each other the girls continued talking like no one was listening on the other side of the bushes.

"And how can you trust Mia? After what she's done to us, with all her stupid slutty pranks?" Cagalli added.

"…She's my blood-cousin, I can't avoid her… and besides, she said that she's done it a million times, well, she says."

"Wow, she really is a—" Dearka chuckled.

"OK, that's exaggeration!" Miri piped up. "There is no way that's true!"

"Well, can you blame her for being a…bitch and a slut?" Cagalli said plainly with disgust on her face.

They stop short when they saw the principal walk by talking to a teacher.

Lacus fakely coughed. "Off topic…I thought we were talking about my…"

"Oh, sorry." The blond turned to the brunette. "Miri, how about you? How was the pain?"

"Oh, my was really painful! …I got it when I was eight." Miri shuddered at the memory.

Both Kira and Athrun stopped and cringed at what they just heard. They both turned to look at the tanned guy beside them, whose eyes were ready to pop out. "I can't believe you, Dearka." "You are really sick, aren't you?" They both said.

"Hey don't look at me! I never touched her then!" Dearka protested. "I swear!"

"Right." They both said disbelievingly.

"Really!?" Lacus said surprised. "Do people who are doing it to you inject something like anesthetics first? You know…to reduce the pain."

All the guys stared at each other. "There was such thing?"

"No." Miri said. "First they clean the area. Then you take a deep breath and they will push the device on you. And it will feel like a wonderful pleasurable pain." She giggled. "It hurts like hell, let me add that."

Lacus cringed. "Uhh… I don't feel like doing it anymore…"

She felt a hand land softly on her shoulder. "It's ok. Don't be scare. If you want, Miri and me are free this weekend, we could help you do it." Cagalli said with her usual determine smile.

All the guys started to get 'ideas'. "I can't believe she said that…and she's my girlfriend…" Athrun said in disbelieve.

"Hey it's worst when she's my little sister…and that's my girlfriend…" Kira said with a drained look.

"Oh I want to see this." Dearka grinned. And sadly that brought him pain, as the guys beside him, beat him up like a pulp.

"Dearka, you have a really sick minded." "Ah, I can't believe we are even your friends…"

"Really? …But do you girls know what you're doing?" the pink haired girl asked curiously.

"Well, not really…" Cagalli chuckled nervously. "I never done it to some one, or even tried—"

"OH my god! I think my ears are going to bleed!" Athrun exclaimed. "Me too!" Kira said.

And a mumble came from behind. "…Ugh…not me!"

And yet again, another beating came on. Poor perverted Dearka.

The pink princess sweat dropped. "Uh, I think we should rethink…"

"Ah, I remember!" Miri spoke up, remembering something. She startled Lacus and Cagalli, completely. "What's wrong?" Lacus asked, worriedly.

"My mom, she knows how to. She did mine and my aunts'."

"Miri!" Dearka said sitting up in a reflex, face filled in shock.

In a sudden, Lacus's eyes gleam with hope, "Really? Oh that's great!"

"But will it hurt like you said?" Lacus added.

"Not if you are Lacus Clyne. And besides this is for Kira, right? He will be happy."

"NOT!" Kira hissed. "My friend is convincing my girl to be a les—"

"True…" Lacus nodded.

"My mom uses a great technique with ice cubes. So don't worry."

"…Ok, I guess I will try."

Miri smiled. "Ok. So, are we meeting at my house? Saturday?"

"Alright that's it! I had it!" "Me too!"

Lacus smiled and nodded. "Oh, I'm there."

"Me three!"

Cagalli laughed. "I want to see Lacus cringe!"

"NO WAY IN HELL!!" a bunch of male voices boomed from behind.

In a startle, all the girls screamed and stood up in reflex, their eyes all widen.

"Kira, Athrun, Dearka?" All the girls said surprised. "What are you guys doing—" Cagalli asked, her voice almost screaming.

"Oh, that's what I was going to ask you, little sister of mine!" Kira said stepping forward.

"Eh? What are you talking about?"

"Oh, we heard you girls talk!" Kira said, crossing his arms over his chest, his flushed light-tanned skin growing with shame.

"You guys were spying on us?" Miri asked, her brows arched in questioning.

"Yah! And thank god we did! Now we know what you girls are up to!" the tanned guy said.

"That's rude you know." Miri said plainly.

"Not when affairs are clearly in the air!" Kira shouted.

"…Affairs?" The girls said dumbly.

"That's right!" The guys retorted back.

"Oh, you mean this weekend? …So? What's the big problem?" Cagalli asked, still clueless.

"Cagalli, how can you say just 'what's the big problem'?" Athrun spoke, looking at his girlfriend in outer shock. "You're my girlfriend for god's sake!"

Cagalli looked at Athrun in a clueless yet frighten expression. "Athrun you are scaring me. What are you talking about?"

"Oh don't play dumb! We heard you say…" Dearka boomed, his sentence continued by the guys.

"That you girls are going to help Lacus to…"

"Take the pain off!!" Kira finally finishing it, "BY DOING IT!"

"HAaaahH!!!???"

Soon the meaning came to them as their cheeks turned red. They all protested with exclamation. "NO you idiots, it's not like that!" Cagalli snapped.

"Eh? It's not?"

"NO, Lacus just wanted to pierce her ear. Simple as that." Cagalli explained.

"Are you serious!?" Kira's eyes popped in realization.

"Oh my relieving god." Athrun felt pathetic for judging them.

"Thank god, my girlfriend isn't a lesbian!" Dearka said cheering. Few seconds later, he got whacked on the head by Miri. "You idiot."

Showing a pair of white teeth Dearka said, "Hey, at least I'm you idiot."

"Really? OH you cute, cuddly, wabby…" Miri rumbled on pinching his tanned cheeks, muttering cute cuddly words.

"Geez, get a room." Cagalli blushed at the sight.

"Maybe we should get one too." A guy whispered in her sensitive ears. "Athrun, we are at school." Cagalli hissed, looking at him. "So? A little hours of fun couldn't ruin our studies, could it?"

"Why do you always say the most seductive things in my ears?" she asked.

"To make you drool for me," Athrun said deeply. Cagalli giggled, playing with his uniform tie. "Well, I'm very so drooling over you now, Athrun Zala."

"Shall we then?" He asked, taking her hand in his. She giggled and nodded.

"Where are they going?" Kira asked, seeing his sister and best-friend walking away.

"I don't know. They didn't say anything." Lacus replied looking at the brunette.

For a short moment, Kira looked at the grass more than to his girlfriend. "Ah, so… the piercing… does it hurt?"

Lacus slightly smiled. "I don't know… I'm getting it this Saturday, Miri's mom is helping me."

"I see…" He said hesitantly.

"…You don't want me to?"

"Ah, that's not what I meant. I mean…"

"Do you want to come? To support me?"

"Uh, sure."

"Ok."

The following day after Saturday… Location: Burger King…

"Holy Cow! You got an earring!?" Both Dearka and Athrun hollered. There was a shiny silver earring on Kira's left ear.

"Darn, Kira how was it?" Athrun asked looking at his pale shivering friend.

"It was awful…all that blood. They…force me…for repayment…that we spied on them…"

"Ah, sorry man, for taking all the pain for us. Anyhow, how bad was it ?" Dearka asked, his eyebrows arched in surprise, and his voice not the tone of a caring person. He squeezed some red sweet ketchup onto his burger then to his fries.

"AAaahhhHH!" Kira jumped at the look of red sauce that looked like fresh blood.

"Yup. It was that bad, huh?" Dearka and Athrun chuckled taking fries from the screaming friend when he wasn't looking.

"Poor soldier. We have lost him."

"Indeed." Dearka nodded. They both looked at the shaky Kira rocking himself on the seat. "Hey, pass me the ketchup. I want to see his reaction again."

"Sure." Athrun grinned.

"AAAAHHHHH!!!! GET THAT AWAY FROM ME!!!!"

Dearka breathe out with pure laughter. "Ah, Priceless."

"Absolutely." Athrun laughed.

A/N: Ok, technically it's not a normal birthday present for Cagalli and Kira. But hey can't argue with goods! I didn't like writing the same thing as others. (I preferred something different on their birthday.)

Anyhow, Happy birthday Cagalli and Kira!

-Hmm… and I just realized this is the first time for me to write in all the characters for one-shot. Sadly, Yzak and Shiho aren't in this one. Hopefully next time.

Hope this was humorous enough for you, the readers!

Thanks for reading! Plz, enjoy pressing that colored review button!

Questions are answered so feel free to drop by and PM me.

By: Daisukiasu'n'caga