Well it's 2008 now, I haven't written anything in a year!
Another oneshot, guess what the pairing is...
Well, I tried something different. Written as Sasuke's thoughts abd is quite angsty. Also, I'm not too sure whether it makes sense. It makes sense to me but I wrote it so... Tell me if it doesn't and I'll try and edit it.
Disclaimer: I do not own any original characters form Naruto, I do, however, own the plot.
Enjoy!
The Fool's Emotion
There she goes, the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. Just look at her, she seems to project her beauty and kindness. I long to reach out and touch her long, dark hair, or maybe even feel her smooth, pale skin with my hand.
Many people think I am a spoilt and arrogant 'brat' who does not deserve the attention I receive from all those girls.
They're probably right.
But I don't care, not at all. I would gladly give it all up if only that one beautiful girl would just look at me. If only she would smile at me.
What I wouldn't give for her to love me.
But she doesn't so I guess I'm stuck as Uchiha Sasuke, the handsome snob.
Sure, I can pretend to not love.
I pride myself in that, I'm sure she even thinks I dislike her. If only she knew how wrong she is.
But, sadly for me, she seems to hate me for some reason.
Why was it?
Ah, yes, I remember!
Something about being a cold and unfeeling bastard who needs to stop acting as if everyone is below him.
What sweet words my loves speaks to me.
Well, who am I kidding? Everyone knows how much she hates me; it's just a sad fact.
And then there's the other fucking problem that stops us from being together.
Uzumaki Naruto.
The village idiot, the stupid boy wonder.
It seems my darling Hinata has a tiny crush on him, the stupid bastard.
I can see right through him, it is her that confuses me.
He uses her, he beats her yet she always goes running back to him like a lost puppy.
It sickens me to watch him abuse her, but it's not like I can do anything.
I hate her, remember?
I don't know why she likes him so much. She hates me yet I have never hurt her like he does. I don't push her to the floor, and break her. I don't enjoy watching her heart shatter and her body bruise.
Just looking at her in pain hurts me; I would never be able to be the reason for her hurt.
Just because I love her.
Even with the makeup I can see the bruises and the cuts. Even with that fake smile I can see the pain she is in.
I can see how broken her heart is.
He's killing her.
He's slowly but surely killing her.
And I don't know what to do.
Why does no one confront him?
Why don't I?
Why do I pretend like it's nothing and simply walk away.
I can see her now; she's sitting in the park alone.
I see the blood and the pain.
I will approach her, and I do.
I sit down beside her, I can see the tears.
She's crying.
Oh god, she's crying.
She's speaking, not to me but herself.
"He won't do it again, I know he won't. I love him, he won't do it again."
Is that really what she thinks. He won't do it again?
I see him standing over there with someone else.
Ah, Sakura.
She's seen them; she's seen their loving kiss.
She can see how he holds Sakura, how he won't let her be harmed.
But Hinata, she sits on this bench with me, both of us pretending the other doesn't exist.
To her, I am invisible.
To me, she is everything.
To the world, we are just two people who mean nothing more than what we are.
I get up and leave, hating myself as I do so. But I can't sit there and watch him cry for him.
I can't just sit there and let her watch me cry for her.
I know that soon he will approach her and tell her he loves her. He will swear it and she will smile.
Pretend she never saw him with another; hide it all behind her mask.
Why does he do it? Does it make him feel better?
Does watching her break under his heated glares and leaving her to pick up the fragments of her broken heart make him feel superior?
Knowing she's nothing more than a cracked girl.
She's scared of him but she pretends its love.
Why?
I love her but she's so stupid. The pain inside her must be huge.
What will happen when she finally breaks?
What will happen to me, watching her die and yet doing nothing to help?
What will happen to him?
What will happen to her?
I don't want to know, I can't bear to know. I know for sure, that if she dies I will die with her.
I return to the bench, find her still sitting there waiting for him to return to her. I sigh and sit down beside her again.
I couldn't let him do this to her again, I have to at least try to help her.
"Why," I say quietly, at last breaking the silent facade.
She looks at me, her beautiful face holding confusion. "Why?" I repeat, watching as her brows knot together.
She sighs and turns from me, all the time remaining quiet. I narrow my eyes and feel anger rising. I get ready to shout at her when she speaks.
"Why do you care?" She asks me and I pause. Why do I care?
"It's not right," I tell her. "You can't let him ruin your life then go running back to him from more!"
"But I love him," she tells me softly. "And he loves me back."
I scoff. "You don't know what love is, Hinata," I say, relishing the way her names sounds on my tongue.
"I do know what love is, Sasuke. And I love him. Just because you're incapable of love doesn't mean I am."
How ironic, the one I love telling me that.
"Then tell me. What is love?" I ask her, staring intently.
"Love is a complicated feeling that can make you happy and also make you sad. Love is what you feel when you look at someone you want to spend your life with. You need to think about things often and must talk to that person as well. Sometimes you don't even realise you're in love."
"Love is not complicated, it's pure and simple and you don't need to think about it to know you're in love." I tell her. "You just know."
"Lust is different to love, Sasuke."
"Then why do you lust over Naruto and label it as love? Why do you always go back to someone who hurts you and doesn't love you!"
"I told you already, I love him! I didn't choose to fall in love, and half the time I wish I didn't. It hurts, god how it hurts. I sometimes feel like I want to die!"
She's crying again and I feel my own eyes start water
"God, Sasuke, when he smiles at me it feels like I could explode from the happiness and then he'll go and mess it all up and then I'll feel so bad. But I can't stop loving him, I just can't!"
Why does she do this to me?
Why does she do it to herself?
"I don't expect you to understand, I mean, I don't either. But I know I can't live without him. I can't breathe without the comfort he rarely brings me. I love him and I always will. No one can ever replace him."
The rain has begun to fall and, with it, my own tears. My heart feels as if it has been stabbed with a knife and I can no longer breathe. Is this the pain Hinata feels?
Oh god it hurts. Please, make the pain stop.
"Love is a fool's emotion." I tell her through my tears. "It brings pain and lives to hurt. It does nothing but devour the heart and leaves behind only the empty shell of a person. It is the role of a biased dice to choose the uncertain future, and is a gamble not worth the risk. A person should never bet their heart for love. I did that once, now look at me. "
"Sasuke," she whispers reaching to touch my shoulder. I stand up and her hand drops. "I'm sorry."
She knows how I feel, it hurts so badly her knowing how I feel and then rejecting me.
I nod and walk away, leaving her in the rain to wait alone for the one she loves.
I gambled with my heart and lost.
Did this pile of angst make any sense? It made me feel heavy hearted so that must be a good thing... No?
Baa humbug!
P.S. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!