Authors Note/Disclaimer: Final Fantasy Tactics isn't mine, it belongs to Squaresoft. Hey, that's what it says on MY copy. Tee hee.
This is shonen ai! Just so you know. Tee hee hee. I wasn't going to post it until I finished the other stories that I was planning on writing that come before it, but since I don't think I'll ever get them done (insert anime sweatdrop here), I'll just say that Musty gets a bit demonic after a possession. Perhaps one day I'll actually finish the fic about it, but that should help this make sense. Read on if you'd like.
"Afterimage"
By Skylark Starflower
Started July 29th, 2005
Finished August 9th, 2005
Mustadio sank further into the sheets, groaning, as Ramza continued to shake him. "Get up, it's time to go. You slept through breakfast again."
"Go 'way," muttered Mustadio, pulling his pillow over his head to block out the sunlight. He had never been much of a morning person.
"Mustadio, come on. You know we can't stay here. If the church finds out your father has been harbouring heretics…" Ramza trailed off; he knew his friend knew what would happen, and he didn't want to sound threatening.
This was enough, however, to convince the young mechanic to finally get out of bed. Sitting up and tossing his blankets aside, a look of grouchy semi consciousness on his face, he hopped down to the paper-strewn floor. Neither Mustadio nor his father knew much about housekeeping, Ramza reflected with an inward smirk.
"Everyone's waiting for us. Let's go."
Mustadio replied with a grunt, and Ramza laughed. He knew his friend would be back to his normal, cheerful self in a short while, once he'd fully woken up.
Besrodio met the two young men as they headed to the door. "Take care, Mustadio, okay?"
"Hrmm…" came the reply.
Besrodio, well used to his son in the morning, turned to Ramza. "You are welcome to come here anytime."
Ramza scratched at the back of his neck, smiling. "I appreciate the offer, but it would be unsafe for us to be seen coming and going from here too often."
"But still, consider the offer. I would be glad to take the risk to see my son and his friends," replied the older mechanic.
"Foolish old man."
Mustadio's eyes widened and he slapped his hands to his mouth, now wide-awake. Ramza, who was used to Mustadio's new - for lack of a better term - habit of being smart mouthed and insulting at odd intervals, suddenly realized that his father didn't know about the remaining effect the demon had on his son.
Besrodio's expression was one of confusion as Mustadio, without another word, turned and ran from the house.
"Mustadio!" Ramza jumped forward, intending to stop his friend from fleeing, but the young mechanic was already out the door and gone.
"What's going on?" asked Besrodio before Ramza had a chance to follow. He turned around slowly, looking at the floor instead of Mustadio's father.
"I'm afraid I forgot to mention the …side effect the Lucavi had on Mustadio…" It didn't take long for him to explain.
"I see. You would probably like to know where he's gone, then."
Ramza smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, that could be useful."
"There's a place down by the ocean where he used to go when he was upset, where the tide has carved the rocks. If you head down and follow the coast, you should find the spot easily. I suspect that's where he's gone."
"Thanks. And I hope we'll be able to come by to visit again. Goodbye." With that, Ramza disappeared out the door after Mustadio. Besrodio watched him go and sighed.
X X X
Ramza made a quick stop in with the rest of his team to let them know they should go ahead without him and Mustadio and they'd catch up later before he made his way down to the water's edge. He didn't take time to admire the scenery as he travelled along, looking for the spot Besrodio had described; hoping that was in fact where Mustadio had gone. It didn't take him long to find.
The hundreds of years of tides had indeed carved the rocks, smoothing them and turning them into natural sculptures. Ramza found Mustadio lying across a rounded shelf of rock, gazing out across the water. He either didn't notice or didn't care when Ramza climbed up and laid down beside him.
"It's really pretty," said Ramza, breaking several moments of silence, hoping Mustadio would respond. He didn't.
They sat there for what seemed like hours, though it was really only about fifteen minutes, watching the waves lap the shoreline. The sunlight sparkled on the water and ocean birds swam and soared, their harsh cries echoing across the water every now and again.
When it became clear that Mustadio still wasn't going to talk, Ramza tried again.
"Your father isn't upset, you know…"
Ramza jumped as Mustadio suddenly slammed a fist down hard on the rock, then swore and cradled it. He finally looked over at Ramza and spoke. "I didn't think he would be," he snapped, and left it at that.
"Then… what's the matter?"
Mustadio didn't reply right away. "Everything…nothing…I don't know," he finally admitted, the anger draining from his voice to be replaced with weariness.
"It's the leftover effect from the demon, isn't it?"
"…"
"Mustadio…"
The young engineer gave in. "Yeah…"
"Tell me about it, then?"
"…Ramza…" Mustadio fell silent, thinking how to phrase his problem. "I…it bothers me, when I can't control what I say. I hate being rude to my friends, even if they understand what's happening, you know?"
"I understand…"
"How could you? Honestly, have you ever not had control over what you say? I…I thought I could control it if I tried hard enough, but when it happened this morning to my father… he's all I've got left, and even still… Ramza, there's nothing I can do about it, I can't control it, and it… it hurts…"
Ramza could see tears welling in Mustadio's eyes, but he honestly didn't know what to say, so he remained silent.
"Ramza… I don't know how much more of this I can take…" He rolled over onto his side, away from Ramza as he dissolved into tears. He didn't want his friend to see him like this. But Ramza didn't care. Sitting up and taking Mustadio by the shoulder, Ramza rolled him back around and sat him up as well. Mustadio hiccupped and gave Ramza a confused look as he tried to calm himself.
"You don't have to deal with this on you own, you know," said Ramza quietly, as he wiped away Mustadio's tears with his thumb.
The young mechanic nodded, sniffling. "I know…but… what if there's nothing that can be done about it? I don't want to be this way for the rest of my life…" Mustadio couldn't help it as he dissolved into tears again.
Ramza didn't know what to do. He had never seen Mustadio like this before; he was usually bright and cheerful. The only other time he could remember the young engineer being anything other than happy was when they'd first met, and that was because he and his father had be in serious trouble.
Ramza was startled when Mustadio leaned over into his chest and continued to sob. He did the only thing he could think of. Wrapping an arm around the distressed young man, he hugged him, rubbing his shoulder. It was still a long time before Mustadio finally calmed down, and for a minute, Ramza almost thought he'd cried himself to sleep, he was so silent and still. A small hiccup made him look down, where he found Mustadio looking back up at him.
"I…I'm sorry, Ramza. You must think… must think I'm –"
He didn't get to finish his sentence. Ramza interrupted him, pressing his lips against his. When he pulled back, he was wearing an amused smirk.
"I don't know what you were about to say, nor do I care. All I see in front of me is the beautiful young man I fell in love with. There might be something new about you, and it might not be a good thing, but that doesn't mean I'm going to give up on you. You should know I don't give up that easily," he said.
Mustadio watched Ramza for several long moments, not knowing whether he wanted to smile or burst into tears again.
"…Thank you, Ramza," he said finally, deciding to smile, though his eyes were still glittering with tears. Ramza chuckled and kissed him again. He was still smiling when he drew back once more.
"So you're going to cheer up now?" he asked. Mustadio laughed and nodded. "Good," Ramza continued. "I don't want to spoil the moment, but we really do need to catch up with the others now."
Mustadio nodded again and moved to hop down from his rocky perch. Ramza followed him down, pausing to look out over the water again.
"This really is a pretty spot," he said.
"I've been coming here since I was five," admitted Mustadio. "My mother first brought me here…"
Ramza said nothing. Mustadio didn't yet know that Ramza knew about his mother and what had happened to her, and he didn't want to admit it to him just yet. But he didn't have to worry, the moment passed and Mustadio turned back to him, a large grin plastered across his face. "Well, we'd better get going, huh?"
Ramza joined Mustadio as they headed off to rejoin the others. He tried to appear happy despite the worry gnawing at his gut, telling him, though he'd helped Mustadio through this tough spot, he'd have many more to deal with along the way.
The End
