Resolutions
I'd taken it hard when he told me our affair was all part of an undercover op for an organization that I'd barely heard of: NCIS. What'd I have to do with all that? Nothing, apparently I just was in the wrong place at the right time.
I'd gone to Los Angeles for a business trip. The company I work for is based there and I flew in for a meeting that my boss couldn't attend. I'm second in command and it was up to me. What I didn't know is there would be hanky-panky going on. Like I said wrong place, right time.
I flew in and immediately felt like I was not alone. I couldn't find anyone following me and to be honest there was no reason to. I drove to my hotel, checked in and went to my room, cleaned up and went down to dinner. As the hostess led me to my table a man bumped into me. He was blonde and good looking, a shade on the tipsy side and his gorgeous lady was smashed. It was only eight o'clock for Pete's sake. He hung on me for a second and then they staggered out of the restaurant. I was shown my table, ordered, ate my dinner and went upstairs to bed. It had been a busy day.
The next day I met with the people at my company. Everything seemed to be working out just fine. We set up a meeting for the next day and I was off to visit the City of Angels by myself.
I'd gone down to Malibu to see where all the pretty people live. They must have been out of town because I didn't see one. I then drove up to Rodeo Drive to check out some of the stores, not that I could afford any of them. I just went to say I'd been there. It's a culture shock. I was beginning to get hungry and stopped at a little kiosk to get fish tacos. I turned away from the kiosk and a voice spoke to me. No, not like on high, just a man's voice. "I wouldn't eat those."
I couldn't help being a wise ass. "You couldn't tell me that before I bought them?"
A man with dusty blond hair and eyes that could make you melt, stepped out from the other side of the kiosk. His sunglasses sat atop his head. He wore two-day scruff like it was his job. His jeans fit him well, but they weren't pricey, you know Wrangler or Lee, and a t-shirt that fit just right. Again nothing pricey just your everyday t-shirt. You knew he was a manly man. He chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. "I couldn't believe you were doing it. No one from LA eats at Sharky's. I guess that means you're a tourist."
I walked over and threw the tacos away. "Yes I am from out of town and I suppose that makes me a tourist. Any suggestion on where I should eat and what I should eat?"
He smiled again and walked towards me. "Sure follow me."
It shocked me that he thought that I'd just follow him willy-nilly. "Wait, I don't know you. You magically show up and I'm supposed to follow you? Just tell me where and I'll be on my way. Thanks."
He laughed at me. "Okay, but I was buying. I know this lovely little burger place that has the best fries. You do eat meat don't you? Come on, let me buy your lunch or was that dinner. If it was dinner I know a great place to take you. I let you to waste your money. Come on let me do this."
He stood there like a little boy who was about to cry if I didn't let him do this. "Okay, okay, take me to your burger joint." He put out his arm like a gentleman taking his lady on a walk. It just occurred to me that I was walking away from here with a total stranger. "Excuse me but, who are you?"
That actually got a full blown belly laugh from him. "Did I forget to introduce myself again. I'm always doing that. My name is Gary Collins, not the star, just little ole me and you are?"
It was my turn to feel stupid. "I'm Tracy Walkins, I visiting from Connecticut, here on business."
He wore that look that says 'I'm interested.' "What kind of business are you in? Cosmetics, clothing sales or computer software?"
It kind of irritated me that he could only see girly things for me to do and my back went up a bit. "Why do I look like cosmetics or that girly stuff. I work for a company that has contracts for weapons with the Navy. Sheesh."
It was his turn to look ashamed. "Sorry, I don't meet too many women arms dealers."
Wow did that sound sexist? "I'm not an arms dealer. That sounds illegal. I work to sell arms to our government, nothing illegal there."
He stopped walking and pulled me out of the mainstream of foot traffic. "I didn't mean anything by it. I just noticed, before the taco, how pretty you are and had no idea what you did for a living. No offense meant by the remark. Please can we start over?"
I nodded to him and put out my hand. "Hello, I'm Tracy. Nice to meet you Gary." I shared one of my rare smiles with him. "Can we go get lunch now? I'm starving."
He grinned, grabbed my hand and pulled me along the sidewalk to a cute little place down the street. He was right on that count. It was delicious.
We talked for a few minutes after we ate and he said he had to get back to work. I had the afternoon to myself so I asked for some pointers for sightseeing.
He told me about the Queen Mary down in Long Beach, the LaBrea Tar Pits in LA and Venice Beach to see what California is all about. "Since tomorrow is Friday and I have that day off I could show you around if you'd like."
I wasn't sure of my day and how many more meetings we'd have to have so we exchanged numbers and I said I'd call him. I didn't really know if I needed him for that or even why he'd want to do this.
He wanted to see me tomorrow. "Please call me. I'd love to show you around. I've really enjoyed this afternoon."
The look he gave me was full of fun and the pout of a little boy. "I'll try. I just have to see what is going on. We may be done early or I could be there all day. Anyway I have another week here. Hey, go to work." He hugged me good-bye and went on his way. I back tracked to my car and went back to my hotel. Once in my room I gave some thought to my new friend Gary. Where did he come from and what did he want? Everything seemed too pat. Boom. There he was all of a sudden and he demanded my attention and I gave it to him like a school girl. That's it, I wouldn't be calling him. I went down had dinner and went to bed.
The next day started pretty much like the first one. Went to the office, sat through two boring meetings were nothing much was accomplished and then they cut me loose. I had another afternoon in LA by myself. I hadn't even walked out of the building when my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller ID and it was him. I didn't bother answering. I wanted nothing to do with him. In a week I'd go home and he'd be here and no thanks.
It rang again. I give him points for persistence. I ignored it again as I drove back to my hotel. I gave my car to the valet and it rang again. How considerate to let me drive in a city I don't know well without a call. I ignored it again. On my way up to my room it rang again. This had become annoying so I picked up. "What can I do for you Mr. Collins?"
His voice came though the speaker. "I thought we had a date for today."
He sounded like my ignoring his calls hadn't happened. He sounded sincere enough but it still irked me. "Listen, I said I'd call you if I didn't have to work. I had to work. Why is this so important to you anyway?"
Gary's next words floored me.
"Hey I know that you thought I was some perv trying to pick you up for nefarious purposes but I'm not. I saw a pretty girl and made a move to get to know you. I would really like that chance. Could I come and get you and we'll go see some sights together? How about the Hollywood Bowl or may the Hollywood sign? I could take you to Joshua Tree National Forest or Death Valley for a couple of days. Wait that's too forward of me. Sorry. I will limit it to in-town sights. Will that be alright?"
He was getting to me I have to admit. I hadn't dated much in the last year because of my job. I'm almost never home. I have weekly trips to Washington, with and without my boss. I work long hours and am exhausted so weekends are for recouping. Maybe I'm a soft touch for a man because of my lack of practice. "Oh all right, come and get me at the Wyndham on Palisades. I'll be out front waiting. How long will you be?"
Gary seemed excited to do his sight-seeing service. "Half an hour, will that be enough time?"
I laughed. "Remember not girly. Half an hour is fine. See you then."
We hung up and I remember thinking. "What have you gotten yourself into now?"
On Saturday Gary drove us out to get on the ferry to Catalina Island. We got off and took a jitney ride to some of the sights on the island. It was interesting to watch Gary savor the laid back existence that the island offered. I'm not sure I'd want to live there. Around four we took the ferry back and picked up his car. He took me back into LA and we met some friends of his for dinner. It felt kind of weird meeting them. Sam and his wife, Michelle, were really nice, down to earth people. I liked their daughter. She had a laugh like little bells and we spent part of the evening with her. She called Gary, Uncle G. It was sweet.
Sunday I needed some quiet time so we put off sight-seeing until afternoon. I'll admit I had so much fun with him. He knew the city and he's a sweet man. He never made a move except to make sure I was treated like a lady. He held doors for me, took my hand in crowds.
At three o'clock he showed up at my door. We'd agreed on the time and he's punctual. I opened the door to a bouquet of flowers and a handsome man. I invited him in to wait while I finished dressing. He was dressed up a bit more than usual so I wondered what we'd be doing. He walked by me and there was a head rush of good smelling man, no, no cologne, just good manly smell. I couldn't get enough of the smell of him. I went in to finish getting ready and all the time I was in there the smell played over and over again in my memory. I almost felt bewitched by it.
Thankfully the flowers came in a vase and I'd placed them on the dresser. When I came out of the bathroom he sat in the chair next to them waiting for me. He looked very handsome and I knew then that the chemistry was between us. He wore that come hither look and I'm pretty sure that if he'd asked I would have said yes. He didn't and in my heart of hearts I was disappointed but relived as well.
We went out for a walk on the beach and dinner at Linnell's on the Beach. I had some of the best mussels that I've ever eaten, had some wonderful conversation and then back to the beach for the walk back to the car. We'd gone halfway back to the car when he took me in his arms. I had waited for this all afternoon and through dinner. When he kissed me it felt like my heart would fly. I know it sounds cliché but it is true. Growing up in Connecticut the moonlit walk on the beach is highly over-rated but not here. This was perfection. The feelings just dropped on me from out of the blue and I think I liked it like that. It felt fresh like early morning rain. I had fallen in love without even knowing it. We drove back to my hotel holding hands like school kids. I so wanted to giggle but I didn't. I'm too old for that nonsense. Who am I kidding if I could have gotten away with it I would have.
When he came into my room with me it felt a little awkward. I know I'm not practiced enough but I was pretty sure he knew where the noses went. "Tracy, I am falling in love with you. I want to take it slow and make sure of it before we do anything you'll regret. Is that okay with you?"
I was disappointed but relieved again. I didn't think that I was ready to fall into bed with him. "Yes it is. Thank you Gary for not pushing. Feelings are growing for you, just not that yet. I'll let you know when."
He gently kissed me good night and left. I still felt like I could fly but felt his loss as soon as the door closed.
Monday I was back to work. The counterparts were busy with their end of the process so I sat in a borrowed cubicle and called my contacts in the Secretary of the Navy's office to facilitate closing the deal for the weaponry. I spent four hours working on the phone when my cell rang with a text message. Gary asked if I wanted a beach picnic for dinner. I texted him back but didn't know when I'd be out of the office. He returned the text with 'whenever' is good with him. I felt so lucky. I must have been sitting there with a goofy grin on my face when the secretary came in to tell me to go home. The others had left to go see a baseball game. How sweet of them to include me.
I went down to my car and drove back to the hotel. I texted Gary when I got to my room and he said he'd be by in about an hour. That gave me time to freshen up, change into jeans, t-shirt and sandals, grab a sweater and meet him downstairs. I texted and let him know I'd be down there waiting instead of him having to come up to get me.
He took me to Venice Beach to see the sights and to have our picnic. It is a huge beach and there is much to see. People live at the beach in seedy little apartments or so Gary told me. He lived there for a while. Every weirdo is there doing their thing, whatever that might be. Vendors hawk their wares to all the tourists. Gary egged me on to buy a souvenir. I didn't really find anything that intrigued me. He made it his mission to find me something that would remind me of Los Angeles and him when I went home. I almost hated that idea now.
Our picnic consisted of good fish tacos and a waffle cone of frozen yogurt. We sat on the beach on a blanket that he carried with us. It was kind of romantic to watch the sun going down in the Pacific Ocean. I'd seen sunrise many times on the east coast; once from the top of Cadillac Mountain in Maine. It was an amazing site. This time was better because I was with someone, someone that I cared deeply for. I had to admit that I missed him that day.
When the sun went down we started our walk back to the car. Gary placed his hand on my hip and I put my arm around his waist. I felt loved and protected. I have no idea where those ideas came from but they felt good.
When he finally got me back to the hotel I didn't want him to leave. I looked into his eyes. "Please come up with me." I think I surprised him.
His turned his blue eyes to look at me and took my hand. "Are you sure?"
I nodded. He pulled into the parking garage and we went up.
He held my hand all the way up to the room in the elevator. He opened the door to my room and checked inside before he let me in. Once inside he took my sweater and laid it on the back of the chair and took me into his arms. I have no idea where the evening went after that but I woke the next morning to a note and a single rose from the bouquet on his pillow. The note said "Love you. Call you later. Had to go to work." I suppose I should have gotten up and got ready for work but it felt so good to languish in that bed for a few extra minutes, and think of all that had happened in the last few days.
When I finally got to work that morning the office was in turmoil. The men I'd been working with had been arrested for international espionage. Their boss handed me an airplane ticket and told me to go back to my hotel, pack and go home. The project had been cancelled. I believe I stood there dumbfounded and then I turned around and went back to my hotel. I tried to text Gary but he never returned my texts. I went to lunch and thought about how lucky I was to have an extra day to spend with Gary before I left the next day. I really wanted another week with him. Still no text from him.
Dinner time came and went and still no text. I worried that maybe last night was just a fling to him. Let's get the tourist to give it up. He hadn't seemed like the Lothario type, there was a sincerity about him.
The next morning, I woke in my bed and felt the loneliness. Gary had never texted me or called. I showered, packed and moved down to the restaurant for breakfast.
As I sat waiting for my tea in walked Gary. He looked exhausted and I saw a bruise on his face. He sat across from me but I felt no warmth. "Tracy, I have some explaining to do. I just want you to listen. My name is not Gary Collins. It is Special Agent G Callen and I work for NCIS. You have been part of an undercover sting against two men who work with you. They were selling the plans for the weaponry that you were trying to sell to the United States Navy to the Chinese. Were you aware of that?
I sat back in my chair. I'd been used by my own government and by a man that I cared about and trusted. "No, I had no idea of any of this. Who are you really?" I could feel the tears forming and fought them. I wouldn't look like some school girl with a broken heart in front of him. "How did you catch them?" I couldn't see where anything I did lead them to my co-workers.
Gary, I mean Agent Callen, picked up my purse and took something from under the flap. "Two of our agents planted this the first evening you ate here. The drunk couple were two of us. We listened in to the meetings that you attended and watched as they read the paper work you brought them. This little device also listened to their phone conversations and read their texts. They were communicating with a known Chinese spy and were getting ready to deliver the plans. We needed you to get into those meetings so we could plant the bugs in their phones electronically to stop that from happening. Your government thanks you."
I looked across the table at him, Gary, G Callen, whoever he was. "I'm not sure I want their thanks for using me. I think I'd would have liked to been asked to help, not been seduced and tricked into it. If you'd excuse me, I have a plane to catch." I rose from the table and started back to my room. I didn't want to talk with him. It would hurt too much.
He grabbed my hand as I walked past him. "Tracy, please listen to me."
I looked into those dashing blues and all I saw was deceit. "Why? So you can lie to me again?" I shook my head and spat out one word. "No."
I went up to my room, picked up my bag, checked out and drove to the airport.
I got back to Connecticut and for the life of me I can't remember the plane ride. My head still roiled with the pain of the deception. My cell has not stopped ringing with a California number since I returned, but it's him, and I really don't want to talk with him. I'm hurt, I'm angry and that is never a good combination. It seems that my immediate boss was in on it. While I flew home the FBI came and got him. I now was the supervisor of the unit. There had been one positive in this whole mess.
About a month after I returned I had a week at a resort in Jamestown, Rhode Island. I sat out on my little patio sipping a soda, working on a new proposal for the Navy when there is a knock on my door. I answer it and a bouquet is thrust through the door followed by a manly scent, one I knew well. "What are you doing here Agent Callen?"
He looked sheepish. "All the way here I tried to find a way to tell you how sorry I was for the fiasco in LA. Not one of them ever sounded right to me." He looked down the hall. I'm sure he didn't want anyone hearing this conversation. "I'm sorry. I never wanted it to look like I seduced you for the job, because I didn't. I don't work that way. It is never 'take one for the job'. I honestly fell in love and since you've been gone I can't get that night out of my head. I took some leave to come and figure it out with you. Can we do that? If not, I'm on the next flight out of Green."
There was that little boy again. I couldn't stay mad at him. As angry as I was I couldn't have him turn around and walk away. I still loved him. I asked him into my room and onto the patio where we talked for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. We talked for the next three days until he had to leave to return to work. We talked every night on the phone for the next few months. Since then I've received another promotion and moved to LA to a cute little bungalow in Venice and we may talk there for the rest of our lives.