Dedication: To my emoness, for without it, I would have never been able to write such angst.
A/N: Been a while since I wrote a Kingdom Hearts fic, but since I've been replaying KH2 I decided to write some oneshots. This one was very emo to me, not because I was emo, but I had just finished Twilight Town and it always makes me sad to see Roxas go - even though the beginning of the game feels like it drags on forever. It always makes me so sad to see Sora wake up and no one really notice Roxas missing... -emo tear-
Special Thanks: TMA (A.K.A: TheMysteriousAuthoress) who betas all my work. I will forever be in your debt!
Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.
In Twilight
---
By Water and Earth Alchemist
-
It had been one month.
One month since Kingdom Hearts was sealed for good. One month since Riku and Sora had returned to the island - hopefully for good this time. One month since Donald, Goofy and the King went back to their world...
And one month since the three of them (Sora, Riku and Kairi) had to explain to their parents just who they were and why Riku and Sora were gone for so long. It was rather awkward, to say the least - the three of them not even entirely sure if Riku's parents believed them or not, but they had told them… everything.
To Kairi, everything was going back to normal again - or, as normal as it could at this point. There was no way three teens could go back to being three normal teens after what had happened. Sure, they weren't fully there just yet - Riku still had the distant, adventurous look hidden in his eyes a lot - but they were getting there.
But nothing can really go back to the way it was - we aren't the same, Kairi thought as she gazed out her bedroom window at the setting sun. It glistened above the sea and radiated on the horizon, almost like a month prior.
She often found herself doing this now - just sitting around by her window, watching the sunset around this time. It annoyed her parents sometimes since she wasn't the same. They blamed Sora and Riku for her changes... Okay, they blamed Sora, Riku, the King, Donald, and Goofy for her changes, but mainly Sora and Riku.
In the back of her mind, she knew it was what she should expect from her parents even though she never acknowledged that thought. Riku and Sora were her best friends - they were a team - she knew they weren't evil. She already knew the culprit for her change of... heart. She just hated really admitting it. It had to be...
Namine.
Namine had to have brought all these new habits, new thoughts - new passions - into her life when they combined. She hadn't met her nobody up until that night, so she wasn't sure if her transformation into this... new Kairi was over or just beginning, but she accepted it and acknowledged it. She was just curious and slightly scared of what was to come.
The sudden urge to go see Sora and talk to him about this trickled through her slowly at that thought. She quickly shook off that urge, knowing she should start on her homework soon but she quickly found the feeling was too hard to shake off so simply. The trickling turned into a waterfall effect that drove her to rise and nearly race out of her room, down the stairs and out the door - yelling to her parents halfway out the door that she'd be back soon.
She walked steadily towards the beach remembering how Sora had also taken up the habit of wanting to watch the sun set; only he was a little odd going about it. He had to be outside, it seemed, and he had to be on the island lying on the paopo tree to watch it. She couldn't help but wonder if that was a habit he picked up from Roxas.
Before she knew it, she found herself running towards the beach and pushing her boat out to sea with in the blink of an eye. The need was taking over her - drowning her until it was getting harder to breath, to think straight. All she could think was to get to him, to be near him. It was almost...
Scary.
She landed on the island a few minutes later, the feeling burning through her like wildfire now, as her boat gently hit the dock. Without another thought she jumped out, her eyes darting to that same old, familiar tree. Her violet eyes quickly spotted the keyblade master and she quickly raced across the sand towards her; but when she opened her mouth to yell to him, she found her throat dry and her lips unable to move.
Finding it useless, Kairi sealed her lips and raced inside the shack and up the stairs. Her heart raced so hard now it pounded in her ears violently and her blood, scorching hot, pumped through her veins as she ran.
When she found herself at the top of the stairs she didn't kick open the door like she thought she would have - no, she knew she would have. It was like an impulse now that stopped her from doing that. An impulse that made her silently open the door and close it behind her once she walked out without a sound.
Last time she checked she wasn't trying to be quiet and yet here she was, racing up to him across the bridge silently - her shoes not scuffing against the wood nor did any boards creak as she ran. She began to wonder if it was Namine again but quickly stopped, a voice telling her deep down that that thought wasn't true.
She spotted Sora quickly while racing across and opened her mouth, yet again, to say something but she found the words just wouldn't form and her body slowing down until she wasn't walking anymore right where the bridge met the sand.
What she was shocked about more than the fact that she felt lost in herself all of a sudden was the fact that Sora hadn't noticed her yet like he normally would. He appeared lost in his own thought; his gaze was on the horizon and, - for some reason - it scared her just looking at him.
"Sora!" She tried to sound cheery, like she normally would, only for that sugary sweet voice to fail her. Instead, she sounded upset and let her fear leak through. He instantly turned to face her at her tone, the thoughtful look in his eyes quickly clearing into a thunderous cloud of worry.
"What's wrong Kairi?" He asked, quickly moving to get off the tree and race towards her - or, he would have if she didn't speak.
She quickly tried to wipe whatever emotions that were spread clearly across her face away while mustering, "Sora - I'm fine...!" He stopped by her words, his eyes scanning over her cautiously as she took a deep intake of air before speaking again, "I was worried about you. That's all. Guess I sounded more scared then I should have."
He raised an eyebrow from her comment. "You were... worried about me?"
She guiltily nodded, biting back her tongue when it came to wanting to speak about their nobodies. Not yet, a voice inside her tried to sooth her, not yet. Instead of soothing her, the voice made her feel even more insane at that moment.
"You've been..." She drawled, looking towards the sun's rays dancing across the waves, "Different."
"'Different'?" He repeated, sounding even more confused.
Deep down she felt a twinge of agony towards herself - why had she suddenly turned this conversation she thought she would be having about herself into how Sora was changing? It wasn't just Sora, she knew that, but she felt guilty towards him... She felt it a lot now that she thought about it, more then she noticed really. She usually blamed it on something she had done to him that day - like tripping him on accident or not helping him on his homework as she said she would.
But this guilt never went away to begin with. Could it be that she blamed herself for having him create his own nobody? It had been her fault really, since he gave up his heart to save her. That was how Roxas was created.
"Kairi?" He asked, snapping her out of her thoughts. She noticed he had turned from confusion to worry in the time she had been deep in her own thought.
She slowly, hesitantly, walked up to the tree and sat down - facing the sunset. The wind brushed at her hair and a few stray gulls cried out from the cove. If it wasn't for the building tension between the two she'd say that it was really peacefully out here.
"It's really nice, isn't it...?" She asked, trying to break up the tension a little before diving into the fray of her own worry and thought, praying he'd understand her. She could feel his cerulean blue eyes on her and could sense his confusion so she gestured to the sunset with her hand. "The sun set. It's so peaceful and calm."
A few minutes passed between the two. Sora continuing to watch her in confusion but after a while he too turned to look towards the sunset. "I... guess," He replied, still sounding confused. There was another pause between the two before he spoke again. "You know, you're different too Kairi."
"Yeah, but... but..." What he was saying was true and she couldn't think up an excuse. Why should she even come up with an excuse anyway? "Sora, did you ever think that... Namine is changing me?"
"What?" He yelled, nearly jumping off the tree in surprise. She normally would have giggled at his reaction but the air between them was too thick now she realized. She found she was even too nervous - maybe even a little scared - too look at him. "What do you mean?"
She took a deep, shaky breath as her eyes darted towards the sand bellow them. "I'm... I'm different now, different like Namine I'm betting. I like to draw now and I like to stay on the sidelines - and that's just occurred since we came home.
"You like to watch the sunset everyday now too, did you ever think that Roxas may be causing you to change as well?" She asked, slowly drawing her eyes away from the sand to towards his face.
He looked back at her with a mixture of shock as well as amazement at her discovery. To Kairi, it looked like he hadn't thought about this once before, and yet she found that hard to believe.
He slowly answered, "I... guess. Have I really changed that much?" She nodded, leaving him to continue, "Maybe... Maybe I didn't want to face what you were just saying - I mean, I have thought about if Roxas was slowly changing me more than once, just not really... that much."
"Did you ever think that they might be able to take our hearts one day?"
She spoke too quickly without even giving them much thought and it was only after she said those words did she realize the truth, that she was afraid of Namine taking over her this whole time. She had lost so much a year ago and when she finally got it all back...
She didn't want to lose it all again.
"Kairi..." Sora's soothing voice knocked her out of her thoughts as she could feel his hand gently grasp her's - drawing her to look at him. His hand was warm - a warmth she never wanted to let go of - and just the very thought made a faint blush swell onto her cheeks, but they both ignored it.
"Have you, Sora?" She asked, still very serious as she watched his every moment like those could possible give her all the answers she was looking for. Instead she found her eyes locking with his as she could clearly see her pain and worry was slowly, but surly, leaking into him.
But then, he did something she didn't expect - or, possible, something she expected Sora to do all along.
He smiled.
"No, I haven't Kairi because..." He paused, his free hand raising to where his heart is, "My heart belongs to me and no one else. Roxas may be half of me - and Namine may have half of you - but it's still ours and not theirs."
It felt like his words slapped her across the face - not painfully, but more as a shock. She felt every emotion drop from her features and could clearly see that Sora watched her just as she had watched him just a few moments ago.
She had never really thought about it like that - that her heart only belonged to her. Ever since she found out Namine was her nobody those words seemed to become covered in a haze until now and she could feel the relief wash over her. She suddenly felt freed of those thoughts, the unseen weight lifted off her shoulders and it made her smile back at him. A weak, gentle smile but a smile nonetheless.
"You're right Sora," She found the words passing her lips in a whisper as she could feel his happiness spreading into her, "My heart does belong to me - I guess I just lost sight of that. Thank you for reminding me."
He chuckled halfheartedly. "You're welcome."
How did you like? I want to know - I really liked this oneshot! I was different to me then all the other oneshots I've done. I might add a second chapter, but I'm still not sure. I'm just gonna see where this goes for now.
So happy New Year and hope you enjoyed!
Please review.
Later . . . Water and Earth Alchemist
