Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Girl Meets world

Hello lovelies, who find solace in the work of obsessive fan girls and boys Ths is my first fanfic. I just felt like there wasn't enough Josh x Maya stuff on fanfiction, so I thought "what the hell"

I totally accept constructive criticism. So if you want to give me your opinion just leave a review or send me a pm. OK enjoy!:D

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She was gorgeous. Absolutely stunning. Of course she always had been, always looked like something pulled out from the pages of a teenaged boys fantasy. But the thing with her wasn't always about her looks, or the way she dressed. It was about that mind. That mouth, that appeared to have no filter. Those eyes that challenge your every word. Those eyes that you counted the seconds you were allowed to look into them for. If not you'd surely drown In them- you'd gladly drown in them. The way she held up her head despite all the negative things that ran through it. It was all these things and much, much more that made Maya Heart my biggest weakness.

It's been nearly four years since we last saw each other. Last spoke. Last fought. I Remember the last thing we said to each other, the way she wore her hair. I remember the color of the lip gloss she wore. The length of her hair. I wonder if it's longer now. Or if she actually cut it for once. I wondered if she was okay. If she forgave me? Forgot me? If she even thought about me anymore? Cared? I know I wouldn't if I were her, not one bit.

Flashback

"Uncle Josh!" Riley shrieked. A light chuckle escaped my lips as I looked up at her from my seat in whatever store we were in now, I stopped paying attention around forever21 and H&M. Maybe we were at that Demolition place.

"Yes, Riles?"

"Which do you think fit me better the pink one or the magenta?"

"Aren't they the same?"

"No!" She replied exasperated.

The pink is slightly longer and has a flowy trim, while the magenta is shorter with a poofier skirt, tight around the middle, with a silver lining! "

" umm-..." I started, trying to remember how they fit her.

"I told her the magenta, it shorter for her legs, without the sluty factor, and her breast look slightly larger in a tasteful way" Maya shouted from the dressing room, making Riley's' face beet red. I couldn't hold my blush either, feeling embarrassed for her. I cleared my throat, and looked at my niece.

"Is it comfortable at least?" I asked trying to be a responsible uncle.

"Which one?" She asked

"The one you really want" I was hardly paying attention as they tried on dress after dress. So I couldn't really recall which one fit her best or the expression she held as she saw herself wear them, but I could tell which one she described with most detail, meaning she paid the most attention to it.

"Which one do I really want, Uncle Josh?"

Giving her a pointed look I took the pink one from her hands, her face slightly falling.

"The pink one it is then" she said, before smiling as I hung it on the nearest rack.

"Okay, okay. Now that that's settled. Which one should I get. Maya walked out in an elegant cremé, floor length dress. There was a slight slit rising to her soft pale thigh. The sleeves just barely reaching t-shirt length as it drifted down. My gaze found the tantalizing curve of her collarbone lowering my eyes to forbidden territory.

"what do ya think?" She asked, twirling in front of us.

Did she look like this in all of them? I internally scolded myself for missing an opportunity to stare at her, without consequences.

My breath caught in my throat as she turned her gaze to me. Raising her eyebrows. Challenging me.

She's so beautiful- Stop it Josh! She's three years younger you!

"You look... nice"

"Just...nice?" Maya's eyes fell to to the material in her hands then at herself in the mirror.

"Uh y-yeah. You look real... nice" I swallowed the lump in my throat quickly taking my phone from my pocket, pretending my attention was elsewhere. Any trace of the smile she held as she walked towards me- err, towards me and Riley, was gone now.

My ears perked up as I heard my name coming from the dressing room my niece and her stunning best friend just disappeared into.

"Don't listen to uncle Josh. It looks exceptional on you, Maya"

"He doesn't think so" Maya said in a matter fact tone.

"So you're not gonna get it, just 'cause his compliment was weak?"

"If he thinks I look ugly in it someone else will too, don't get me wrong I don't give a shit what people think of me, I just want the last version of me they see walking to get that diploma being the best one I can look like."

"Maya..." Riley started.

"Riles, I just want all those asswhole's who said I wouldn't make it, see that I did, and look fucking amazing while I do " I could hear her laugh, but it wasn't her usual lighthearted laugh. And it was my fault. And the both of us knew it.

"Hey, don't pout, peaches. I'll get the violet one it's better than just nice" I could see her smile in my head. I knew it wasn't the one she wore as she walked out here.

"Nice isn't a bad compliment, Maya"

"Nice is what you say when someone looks like crap and you don't want them to feel as bad as they look" I heard Riley sigh, knowing just as well as I did that she wouldn't win against Maya.

They walked out three minutes later, arms linked and talking about God knows what. Riley stood on line, ready to purchase her dress, while Maya walked away to put the long cremé dress away.

I don't really remember very clearly when I decided to follow her, I just know I did.

"Maya" I said grabbing her pale wrist.

She's so soft... is all of her this soft?! STOP IT JOSH! FOCUS!

"Get the dress" She just smiled at me.

"No" never saying the things I expect.

"Get the dress, Maya" I said pointedly.

"Why should I, uncle Boing?" Her grin widening the longer we stared at one another.

"Because it looks very nice on you. And I can tell that you love it." She shook her head.

"Hmmm...Nope" Her lips curly in that cute mischievous way only she could do, shaking her mess of curls from side to side. "That's not why. What is it, Josh? You wouldn't want me to just look nice, would you? You want me to flaunt my stuff, don't you?" She said with childlike humor. Bumping her hip into the air. Doing things to me that definitely shouldn't be happening.

Her eyes opened wide, with innocence you wouldn't think she had.

" I'm kidding, Josh... I just don't want to look nice. I want to look beautiful for one night. Feel as beautiful as the dress makes me look, you know. I do like the dress."

You're always beautiful. I wish you would see that.

"But if the guy I want to impress just thinks it's nice." She smiled gesturing to me. "Then I don't want it." She turned to put it back.

I exhaled deeply, probably seeming annoyed to her, but just trying to calm down my nerves.

"You shouldn't be trying to impress me, Maya."

It's working too well

"Why do you fight it?" She asks.

Because you're too young for me. Because I'm not good enough for you. Because it's wrong.

" I'm not fighting anything, Maya. The dress fits you amazing. I only said nice, because if I said anything else you would have taken it the wrong way. Buy the dress Maya, do it to impress someone your own age. Who you can actually be with." It was harsh. Yes I know but, I figured the harsher, the more she'll begin to understand.

Her eyes turned hard, and I tried to look away, but they were so fierce so strong... so beautiful, I just couldn't. She held the dress tightly in her hands.

"One day I won't be an option anymore, Josh. One day you'll push me away too hard. And I won't get back up looking for you"

She turned and walked to the checkout., as I stared after her.

...

"What made you decide to get the dress after all? " Riley suddenly asked as we neared Corey and Topanga's door.

" 'cause I like it" Maya smiled at my niece, stopping by the door, telling Riley she wanted to talk to me for a minute.

"What Maya?" I asked rubbing the back of my neck as we stood in front of each other. "You never told me what it was you really thought of the dress"

"Really,Maya?"

She bit her lip shyly. Taking me completely by surprise. I was in total awe. I didn't didn't mean to do it. Really. I didn't. But I... just did.

Her lips tasted like fresh strawberries from the smoothie she had at the mall. Her soft lips were moving just as fast as mine were from the moment they met. I was drowning in a ocean of Maya Hart, finding myself praying for a moment longer to endure this magical torture.

Just one more second, God. Please. Let me have her for one second more.

My tongue met hers in a frenzie, as if life was just barely away from obliterating.

One more second, please.

Eventually air became a necessity and we pulled away. Her hands still tangled in my hair. Bennie long forgotten on the floor. My hands at her hips where they held her as close to me as I could get her without causing her pain.

I moved my body about 3 feet away from her, suddenly cold at the loss of contact.

She grinned happily. Looking absolutely breathless and stunning. Her fingers trembling as the lightly touched where mine just were.

"I knew you felt the same",in that moment my world went crashing down around me. She was only 18. Her life was literally just starting. I'm was 21 years old. It was wrong. It doesn't matter how right it feels. Or how completely fantastic she tasted. God, that kiss. But she was 3 years younger than me it wouldn't have been fair to her. WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO!?

"That was a mistake" I whispered.

"...w-What?"

"That shouldn't have happened"

"B-but it did ,Josh. And you know you felt it too. You just had t-"

"No, Maya. I don't feel anything" I seethed through my teeth. Desperate to finish the lies I had to tell this gorgeous angel in from of me. "I'm sorry but i'm just gonna have to be blunt with you. You just won't grasp that I don't want to be with you. You need to stop obsessing over me. It needs to stop" She stared at me with wide blue eyes, and I nearly fell at the pain I saw in them. But I didn't stop.

"B-but that kiss-"

" Was to show you there's nothing between us. You shouldn't try to impress me, cause you can't. I'm sorry. I really am. I care about you. You're my nieces best friend. But you're just a kid, Maya." I hated myself then. Knowing how she felt about being seen as a child.

" I want a woman who's strong, independent and beautiful." I watched her flinch at my words, not knowing I was describing her, and my heart cried out in agony.

STOP! STOP IT, PLEASE! We're hurting her. She'll never forgive us! PLEASE!

But I didn't.

"You need to get over this crush, because it's not gonna happen. Not with me... I'm sorry." And for the first time in my life I saw Maya Hart cry. Silent tears that burned me as I looked her. I took that magnificent smile away and replaced it with this.

"I'm sorry too, Josh." She whispered, before going inside.

End of Flashback

Back then, I thought that was what I was supposed to do, now... Now I know.

I should have loved her. Should've shown her what she meant to me…

But i didn't.