Disclaimer: I don't own The Man from U.N.C.L.E. I think it's a fantastic movie, and I bet the TV show was really cool! But yeah, I don't own either. ^_~

A/N: Katie is Illya and Gaby's daughter, and she's seven years old here!

Raining on Saturday

"It's going to rain forever."

Napoleon flipped the page of his newspaper, not looking over at the little exaggerator perched in the window seat, her nose pressed against the glass. "Oh, definitely not. Until the end of the century, maybe, but not forever."

Katie made a sound that was somewhere between a sigh and grunt and flopped across the cushion in the window seat. The little Russian-German seven-year-old was spending the day with him while her parents went off and had the day to themselves. Normally she was quite willing to entertain herself, but she preferred playing outdoors. Scattered around her was an array of books and toys, but she only seemed interested in going outside even though the sky was dumping buckets.

"Gonna die of being bored."

"Also unlikely." Napoleon folded the newspaper and laid it in his lap, guessing that he wasn't going to be able to finish it any time soon. "You're certainly in a hyperbolic mood today."

"What's that mean?" she asked, rolling onto her back and propping her feet up on the wall that boxed in the window seat.

"Hyperbolic. Hyperbole. You're exaggerating everything."

"Am not. It's really, really true." She put her hands over her face and then peeked at him from between her fingers. "Can't we go somewhere?"

Most of the time, when Napoleon was babysitting, he would take Katie to the movies or an art museum or a park, but it was a downpour out there. An umbrella would be a poor defense when it was raining cats and dogs and the occasional cart horse.

He nodded toward the window and the rain that was streaming down the panes. "Not unless you're in the mood to drown."

She sat up again and lifted her chin. "I'm a very good swimmer."

"I know." He had been there when she had been taught to swim in the pool behind one of the many safe houses that U.N.C.L.E. owned.

"So…?"

"We're staying home today." Napoleon stood up and dropped his newspaper on the arm of his chair. "But I'll start making lunch. How does that sound?"

For a moment, a look of serious disappoint crossed her face, but she was nothing if not adaptable and it quickly passed. She offered a smile that he took as a consolation. "Okaaay."

"What would you like? I've been experimenting with Asian flavors lately—"

"Can we have grilled cheese sandwiches?"

Ah, yes, all of his well-honed culinary expertise plus years of kitchen experience, and she wanted grilled cheese. Of course. He smiled and gave a shallow bow. "If that's what the lady would like."

"Pleeeeease."

"As you wish." Picking up the newspaper, he gave her an affectionate light swat on the shoulder. "You know, you always could study your Spanish workbook if you've got nothing else to do."

"But it's Saturday!" she said, as if the very idea of doing her schoolwork on such an inherently lazy day was appalling. Seeing how she was homeschooled, the weekend really was the only time she could truly escape her studies, so he guessed she had a point. Still, at least he made the weekly lessons that she had with him fun. Plus, they always did something fun afterwards, such as practicing safe-cracking or making ciphers or gambling with cookies.

Honestly, he taught her all the worthwhile skills.

"It was just a suggestion."

She assumed a very wry, Gaby-esque expression. "I'd rather be bored to death."

He swatted her again and then dropped the newspaper on her head, getting a laugh out of her. Leaving her in the living room, he grabbed his apron on his way to the stove and tied it around his neck so he wouldn't ruin his clothes while whipping up these grilled cheese sandwiches.

After a while, he realized that Katie was being mighty quiet, which made him instantly suspicious. It wasn't that she was a loud child, it was just that he didn't hear her moving around or flipping pages in a book or anything really. And when she got that quiet, it usually meant trouble.

"Kat?"

No answer.

Flipping the final sandwich onto a plate, he stepped away from the stove to glance into the living room. She was gone. "Katie?" he called, raising his voice. Ah. Her rain boots were gone. Groaning, he crossed the room and looked out into the tiny patch of yard in front of the thin townhouse.

Oh, it was worse than he thought.

Grabbing his trench coat from the hook by the door, he headed outside, shaking his head as he stepped onto the stoop. He had to stay directly under the awning or he would get drenched in a second, just like Katie was already. The tiny girl was racing around the front yard, her formerly blue and white chic tunic and pants now black and grey with mud. Well. At least she was happy judging by her breathless laughter and huge grin.

But she also looked like she had climbed out of a lagoon to terrorize the neighborhood.

"What are you doing, Katie girl?"

Water dripped down Katie's hair and face, streaking the mud mask on her face. All that mud probably came from the similarly decorated creature standing next to her, the one with the floppy red hair and the buck teeth and the ratty baseball hat.

"Playing," she said, her grin so unashamed and confident that he had to melt a little. His determination to bring her inside dissolved at the edges. U.N.C.L.E. moved them around so much, she rarely got the chance to make friends her own age. Still, she was going to catch a cold out here. But, as always, he found it so hard to tell her no.

"You…" He sighed as she looked up at him, those big green eyes of hers begging for a couple more minutes. "You should come inside in a couple minutes. Lunch is ready, all right?"

"All right!" she said, beaming at him, "Got it."

That smile was worth it, even if he was a sucker. Only girl that had actually managed to wrap him around her finger.

She took off with the ragamuffin from next door, and he watched from the stoop for a long moment, his hand resting on the doorframe. He wished she could have more moments like this one, slices of normality that other kids took for granted. Yes, her life would be full of grand places and interesting memories, but she would miss out on other things. It was a difficult bargain, but Illya and Gaby couldn't just drop out of U.N.C.L.E. and Napoleon wouldn't leave until they did, even though his sentence was finished. They were a team, after all.

A few minutes later, Katie stayed true to her word and came inside, her curls plastered to her face and her clothes completely ruined, her cheeks bright red.

"Ah, ah, not a step farther." Napoleon caught her up in a massive, plush white towel before she could trail soggy boot prints all over his house. "You need a bath," he said as he ruffled her hair with the towel, drying her off as best he could. She had extra clothes in the closet, so she could at least change out of those wet things. "Did you have fun?"

She giggled and pulled the towel around her head like it was a hood. "Yes. And I got more mud on Bobby than he got on me!" Her smile was positively smug. "So I won."

Napoleon chucked her under her chin and winked. "Atta girl, Kat."

The kid needed some real, standard childhood memories, anyways. Maybe this would be one of them.