Title: Prince (ess?) Yuuri and the Pea

Genre: comedy/Romance

Pairing: Wolfyuu and hinted Gwendel /Anissina.

Disclaimer: Don't own KKM and don't own the fairytale.

A/N: Ducks from angry Backhanded Slap and Animal in You readers. I'm currently working on Backhanded Slap and a beta is looking at Animal in You so the next chapters will be posted soon! Also this story is a cultivation of living in an apartment where the central air unit is broken and the temperature all this week was in the 90's. (So I am sweating up a storm).

Queen Celi tapped her perfectly manicured fingers on the table as she took a sip of tea with her free hand. Across from her was her advisor, Günter, who was warily cupping his hands around his teacup. There was something in the Queen's normally beautiful, serene, eyes that told him that he should stay on the alert. The last time her eyes held that gaze Queen Celi decreed for an annual Royal Beauty Pageant to be held every spring throughout the kingdom but with male participants alone. The royal adviser was still plagued with nightmares of big, burly, men floating by him in a sea of dresses made of taffeta.

The violet haired man couldn't repress a shiver from the memory.

The Queen calmly stirred the sugar in her tea with a gracious smile never leaving her face; "you know I think it's time that we found Wolfram a princess to marry, don't you think?"

"Umm… your Majesty," Günter stuttered, not even trying to hide his confusement. Tilting his head to the side, he weakly smiled. "You have two sons that are older than Wolfram. Shouldn't you try and marry them off first according to age?" Günter questioned.

"Oh, that," Queen Celi laughed with a wave of her hand. "I've already arranged a royal marriage interview for Gwendel to be set with his childhood friend, Princess Anissina Von Karbelnikoff." Günter could not be blamed when he spat out his tea in surprise.

'Poor Gwendel, he shall be missed.' Günter thought as he scrambled for a napkin. The royal adviser couldn't help but feel that way as he thought back on Gwendel and Anissana's friendship. Said friendship mostly consisted of Gwendel being the unwilling lab rat to the crazed inventor's inventions before they blew up.

Wiping his mouth with a napkin, Günter asked with some trepidation, "And…and Conrart?"

"He seems more interested in the military right now." Queen Celi heavily sighed as she shook her head. "That boy has no sense of priorities."

"So what plan do you have in mind, you majesty?" he asked not wishing to know any more reasons.

The Queen clasped her hands together, brightly smiling, before she announced; "Why a ball of course! I've already had invitations sent out a week ago to the neighboring kingdoms!"

'So that's was what she was up to when she was supposed to be signing document for the new dam that's going to be built.' Günter thought with some dismay.

Ignoring Günter's twitching the blonde Queen continued, "They'll be here tomorrow night and I've already set up decorating committee and the chefs got the menu that is going to be served at the party weeks ago."

"It appears you have everything already covered, your majesty." Günter blinked in surprise. Normally the Queen wasn't so organized. Soon surprise gave way to curiosity as he asked, "What was it that you needed my help with?"

With a seductive smile the Queen leaned back in her chair and stated, "You have the most important job of all, Günter." Seeing her adviser tilt his head in confusion, she further explained, "You see my darling Wolfy deserves the best. So your job is to come up with a test that only a real princess could pass. If she passes the princess can marry my son." With that the Queen sat her cup on the table and blew her suddenly pale adviser a kiss. "Don't let me down, Günter. Now if you excuse me, I have some documents that need to be signed."

Günter continued to sit dumbfounded at the table that he and the Queen were sitting at only moments ago. A test to prove that she is a true princess? What could he possibly make the girl go through to prove that? Groaning to himself as he rested his head in his hands, he tried to think.

'At least Prince Wolfram is out hunting and won't be aware of his mother's scheming until tonight.' Günter thought.

- (o) 0 (o)-

"Gah Dang it!" A distressed voice rang throughout the densely overgrown forest. "We're lost!" the voice's owner exclaimed as the horse finally trudged through the overgrowth and into the clearing, revealing that it was Prince Yuuri of a nearby kingdom. Instead of being dressed like a prince he was dressed in commoner's clothes that were hidden underneath a brown cloak. Despite these factors his raven hair and onyx colored eyes boldly stood out. The reason why he was dressed that way was because his adviser, Murata ,felt that if they were to travel looking like royalty it would be like wearing a sign that said, 'I have money so, please, feel free to rob me!'

"I told you that you we should have taken a left at Aldershire, Prince Yuuri." Sighed Murata. He rode up beside the prince and sighed in fake exasperation, "at this rate we'll never make it to Queen Celi's in time."

"I thought it was a shortcut." The prince whined as they continued to travel aimlessly down the path. Rubbing the back of his head agitation, Yuuri worriedly sighed. "If I don't get to Queen Celi's in time then my brother will never trust me with an important task again."

Even as Yuuri spoke his adviser, Murata, tried very hard not to laugh. Yes, they were heading to Queen Celi's kingdom but not for the reason Yuuri thought. The whole story started several days ago when they received an invitation, Murata just so happened to be there when Queen Jennifer received said invite, from Queen Celi for a ball where the main objective was to marry one of Queen Celi's sons. Of course Murata couldn't help but laugh as Queen Jennifer began to bounce excitedly in her seat.

Sure, it wasn't a secret that Queen Jennifer always wanted a daughter and when Prince Yuuri was born she substituted him for the daughter she never had. Queen Jennifer dressed Yuuri in dresses, put bows in his hair, and called him her little Princess, inadvertently giving the prince the title of princess throughout the entire kingdom. Yuuri was treated as a princess until he became older and demanded to be treated as a prince and a boy. Unfortunately for Yuuri in some circles, namely those in the castle and family members, the title still stuck.

However, Murata never imagined that Yuuri's title of princess actually traveled outside of the kingdom.

So imagine Murata's laughter when the invitation asked for Princess Yuuri. Then, to make matters even more entertaining, Queen Jennifer basically said that no other princess could beat her Yuuri for Prince Wolfram's heart and hand. So when the Queen asked Murata to help her come up with a plan to get Yuuri to the ball he was more than happy to oblige. After all, not only was he an adviser to the Prince, but he was also his friend, and as his friend he knew that Yuuri was in desperate need of some lovin'. Plus he thought the whole ordeal was too entertaining for words. In the end Murata told Yuuri that his family thought it was time to prove himself and that they were sending him to Queen Celi's kingdom to discuss political affairs and Yuuri was more than happy to go.

Yuuri never even questioned why Murata was going with him.

"Murata," Yuuri growled in frustration, snapping the adviser out of his thoughts. "Were you even paying attention?"

"I was paying attention to the map before you got us lost." Murata answered in a bored tone making his friend seethe before he angrily look down at the map again. Murata wasn't worried; he knew exactly where they were and all was going according to plan. He knew if they arrived to the castle a day early and the prince found out what he was really called for was a ball for princesses Yuuri would leave right then and there. If they got lost and stayed in a hotel though….

"Aha!" Yuuri called out triumphantly breaking Murata from his thoughts. "I know exactly where we are!" Yuuri exclaimed, stuffing the map back into his pocket. He then took off full gallop to the path on his right.

'This can't be good. 'Murata thought as he followed the energetic prince down the path. If Yuuri found his way to the castle then all Murata's hard work would be ruined but how was he going to stop his friend?

Yuuri couldn't help but smile at his good fortune. He found a way out of the maze they called a forest all on his own with no help from Murata! He was so ecstatic at the thought of getting back on track that he wasn't paying any attention to his surroundings. As Yuuri turned down the path he didn't see a blonde haired boy dressed in a royal blue uniform until it was too late. The blonde's eyes went wide when he saw that they were going to hit head on.

'Crap!' was the only thought that ran through his mind as he grabbed to horse's reigns and tried to move the horse to the side in a lame, last minute, attempt to avoid the blonde on the white stallion. Instead of moving out of the way, the horse rose on its back hooves throwing Yuuri harshly to the ground.

The blonde, however, expertly maneuvered his horse to get out of Yuuri's path and easily regained control of his horse. Yuuri gritted his teeth at the blonde as he lied on the ground. Sure he landed hard on his right leg and was hurt but he knew it wasn't anything serious. It wasn't the first time he was thrown from a horse and he knew it wasn't going to be his last. If anything he was going to walk with a limp and be covered in bruises for a couple of days.

"Where did you learn how to ride a horse? Who just runs through the forest without looking where they are going?" The blonde admonished from his horse as he glared down at Yuuri.

"I'm sorry, but if I'm not mistaken you were galloping around haphazardly too." Murata interrupted, finally catching up to Yuuri in time to witness the boys almost crash into one another. Getting off his horse, Murata went over to help up his friend and replied; "I apologize for Yuuri's blunder though, Mister…?"

The blonde looked between the two strangers before he snorted, "Wolfram. Prince Wolfram"

'Uh-oh' Murata thought as Yuuri's face brightened up at the fact that they were face to face with Queen's Celi's son and, therefore, not far from the castle.

Before Murata was able to think of something Yuuri sighed in relief, "You're Prince Wolfram? I am—"

"Now, now, Yuuri," Murata quickly said as he covered the prince's mouth with his hand successfully muffling whatever it was Yuuri was trying to say. "I am sure that the Prince doesn't care who we are considering we are trespassing in his forest." He continued politely as Yuuri flailed his arms around.

Wolfram raised his eyebrow at the scene before him before he asked, "Is your friend okay?"

"Yes he is thank you." Murata said politely as he showed a limping Yuuri to his horse, with his hand still over Yuuri's mouth of course.

"What do you think you're doing Murata?" Yuuri demanded in a hush tone once Murata took his hand away from his face.

Rolling his eyes, he answered lowly so Wolfram wouldn't be able to hear, "Just thinking it wouldn't be good for you if you got on his bad side." Yuuri was about to protest but Murata cut him off, "just trust me."

Turning around, Murata attempted to undo the damage that was done. "Sorry, Prince Wolfram, but we somehow got lost and we were trying to find out way to town." Wolfram rolled his eyes and let out a "humph" upset that that this guy Muarta didn't give him a decent apology and that he was trying to ask him for help without actually asking.

Yuuri sighed at the two before he politely smiled and bowed his head slightly. "Prince Wolfram I am sorry that I almost ran you off the path but we'll go ahead and find out way to town on our own."

Wolfram pretty much felt something snap as he heard Yuuri's words, "I never said I wasn't going to help you find your way to town." He harshly admonished almost making Yuuri fall of his horse again in surprise. After taking a deep breath in order to clam himself down Wolfram teased, "Besides I can't expect a wimp who can't even control his horse to get into town without a problem."

"Hey," Yuuri demanded as Wolfram rode up beside him, "I am not a wimp." Murata rolled his eye in annoyance s at the two Princes' behavior before following the two down the path.

- (0) 0 (0) -

Wolfram had been kind enough to take Yuuri and Murata to the edge of town and Yuuri had unexpectedly discovered that he and the hot head had a lot in common on the ride. They both liked to sword fight, hunt, swim, and be outdoors. So riding into town Yuuri and Murata were alone and there was nothing more that Yuuri would have like that to ask what it was Murata was up to. However, knew the only way to get Murata to talk was to corner him.

"Okay Murata spill." Yuuri demanded when they arrived to a local tavern and hotel. "What was that all about in the forest? Why wouldn't you let me say that I was Prince Yuuri?"

Murata was actually at a loss of words for a minute but only a minute. Murata then of a quick lie. "Well, how good would it look for you to come into Queen Celi's, who is protective of her sons, saying that you almost ran her son off his horse? And you come walking in, limping no less?" Yuuri at least had the decency to look contrite much to Murata's relief. All he had to do was keep this up until tomorrow.

'Plus I think Yuuri has a good chance of getting the prince's hand' Murata thought as he flopped down on one of the straw filled beds and shifted around to find a comfortable spot. 'I mean Wolfram was flirting with Yuuri while we were on the path.' Murata inwardly smirked in victory when he realized that he knew that Wolfram at least found Yuuri attractive and that he had a little bit of an edge over the other princesses.

Now, how was he going to get Yuuri into that dress that Queen Jennifer sent with him for Yuuri to wear?

- (o) 0 (o) -

To be continued….

This wasn't supposed to be multichapter but a one-shot but it was getting way too long so I have to split it up . ^^;